• Published 13th Dec 2012
  • 4,264 Views, 57 Comments

Oh, you - MidnightDancer

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The Entire Thing

“It’s a twister!” The mares screamed at the farmpony’s exclamation, clutching each other in horror as the pegasus-born tornado careened out of control towards their hot air balloon. Moments later, the cords to the basket snapped, flinging the hapless mares through the air towards their almost certain doom. Turning over and over, Applejack screamed, looking frantically around for Rarity as her legs pinwheeled through the air.

Her panicked hollering stopped suddenly as the five friends landed with a gentle flump onto the thick, dense cloud the friend they came to visit had made. Rainbow, a cocky grin on her face, spun the cloud to release them all upwards. The girls wailed to the sky, hearts in their throats, before finding themselves caught in the arms of the other Ponyville pegasi that entered into the Academy. Applejack herself had been caught by a white pony named Milky Way, his scraggly mane draped ever so slightly over his face.

Applejack sighed, relieved. Whilst she recovered her smile, she looked over and froze.

The white mare of her current affection was draped shamelessly-shamelessly!-over the black pegasus Thunderlane, clinging to him, even batting her eyes. The orange mare felt her temper rising, and looked away as they were deposited to safety. Cheeks burning, she tried her level best to focus on the safety of her friends and the fact that Rainbow had saved them-again.

Tipping her hat kindly to Milky Way in thanks, she joined the others, trying to shove aside her resentment. Pinkie’s tearful face at her reunion with her marefriend softened her heart, and she allowed a smile to slip across her face for a moment.

“But, what are you all doing here?” came the voice of Rainbow Dash who was currently holding a relieved Pinkie Pie in her hooves.

“We wanted to give you a care package,” Applejack responded while trotting towards her pegasus friend, “didn’t realize you’d be in the middle of some crazy tornado drill." Her grin quickly diminished as she saw Rainbow moving to confront the pony that had apparently been responsible for their near-fatal accident in the sky, and she gulped.

Standing protectively in front of her friends-even that hare brained harlot I call a fillyfriend, she thought-she listened to this ‘Lightning Dust’ try to justify her nearly splattering them across the runway of the Academy, and felt her temper ping right back up to the high regions. Figuring something of a talk was in order, she turned back to her friends; one white mare in particular.

Rarity appeared fully oblivious to Applejack’s true reason for being upset, and offered a comforting smile. “Well, that makes...three times now that Rainbow has saved my flank! I’m starting to think I should keep my hooves on the ground.” Chuckling self-deprecatingly, she fluffed her perfectly coifed mane with a hoof.

“Looked to me like you were appreciatin’ somepony else,” the farmpony grumbled, turning away from Rarity to look out across the training grounds.

Azure eyes widened in confusion for a moment before she had the grace to finally blush. “Ah, yes, well, when a dashing stallion prevents one from falling to one’s doom, I don’t think a show of appreciation is entirely out of order.”

Grudgingly, Applejack had to admit she was right. She herself was mighty thankful to that Milky Way for snagging her out of the air-but then, not so grateful as to throw herself at him like some common streetmare! Snorting, she turned back to Rarity, fixating on her with her steely green glare. “Maybe not, but I was thinkin’ more along the lines of complimentin’ his flightsuit, not tryin’ to get him out of it!”

Recoiling as if she had been struck, Rarity’s legs shook for a moment before she took a deep, steadying breath. She gave a little ‘humph’ to her fillyfriend, her nose high in the air. “I apologize Applejack, but there’s no need to stoop to such petty insults. I will be with the other girls, should you wish to come apologize and discuss this like civilized ponies.” With that proclamation, she took off at a high-stepping trot to join the others, leaving Applejack to stew in her anger.

After a moment’s internal struggle, Applejack followed in the sweet scented wake of her very miffed marefriend, head down and eyes straight ahead under her trusty Stetson. We’re here for Rainbow, near death experiences aside, she reminded herself.


Deciding that it would be best if they stayed for one more day before returning to Ponyville, the friends rented out a small group of three hotel rooms at a place called ‘Over Night’s Lodge’ for the one night.

Sapphire eyes scanned the page in front of her, sweeping over the words, but not taking them in. An alabaster hoof prodded worryiedly at the bedspread beneath her-hardly a high thread count, but I suppose it will do-as she chanced a sidelong glance to the other end of the room.

Nothing but an orange mare with a stetson pulled over her face. She sighed. Applejack had been stonewalling her all evening, from the Academy through dinner all the way to their shared hotel room. Her eyes drifted back to the utterly dull romance novel she had found hiding inside the drawer of a wooden side table that sat between two beds. While always excellent at navigating the complex social circles she spent her life moving in, matters of the heart were a completely different minefield.

She tapped her chin, humming under her breath to herself as she pondered the situation. Obviously, she had INITIALLY been at fault in this situation, but surely Applejack’s overreaction had her shoulder some of the guilt for their mutual silence-

“Do ya mind? Some ponies are trying to sleep,” came a bitter growl from the side of the room.

With a roll of her eyes, Rarity turned to her. “Come now, Applejack, we both know perfectly well that you weren’t asleep. Besides, we all know that you snore.”

“S’why I said trying.” After a second, another grunt from the orange mare. “And I most certainly do not.”

“You most certainly do.” The white unicorn gave up on pretending to read her novel and slammed it shut with her hoof, lifting it back to the bedside table with her telekinesis. “It hardly matters. I suppose we should try to get some sleep.” With a huff, she slid herself beneath the covers, ignoring the feel of hard jade eyes drilling into her back.

Unable to keep the roiling snake of emotion contained any longer, Applejack snapped her head up and looked across the room. “I see. Well, I’m glad that somepony will be gettin’ her beauty sleep this evenin’.” A light snort met her words, but the white pony did not move from her place beneath the covers.

Seconds spun out to minutes, each tick of the clock cutting through the silence like a knife, making it harder and harder to breathe. Hat shoved down over her face once more, Applejack willed sleep to come.

It didn’t.

And she could tell from the sound of the other mare’s breathing, the sound she had become so intimately acquainted with in the past year, that sleep did not come easy to her either. The orange mare chanced a look up, her eyes running over the violet curls that felt just like spun silk, the white fur that rubbed so softly against her on so many nights back at the farm. It may have been a matter of four feet between them, but to the farmpony, it felt like a canyon.

Standing suddenly, she planted her hat back on her head with a snort. “I can’t take this. Rarity, there’s one thing that my Ma always told me back before she-before.”

Out of respect, the white mare turned, eying her lover.

“She always told me when I grew up and found my special somepony, to never go to bed angry. Ever.” A saffron hoof stomped the floor for emphasis. “You and me, we’re hashin’ this out, here and now, because I’m not gonna be gettin’ any shut eye until we do.”

Rarity sat up in bed, levelling a stony gaze at Applejack. Her mouth opened, then snapped shut just as quickly as her ears perked up at the sound of the door next door opening and slamming shut. Both pony’s ears pricked up at the unmistakable sound of Pinkie Pie’s giggling accompanied by a raspy whisper that could only be Rainbow Dash. Both mares rolled their eyes, feeling the seriousness of the situation being slowly mutilated by their friends next door.

Rarity recovered quickly. “Well, as I was going to say, darling, I do think your mother has a point, if only because I don’t think I can sleep with us at odds this way either-”

A bump to the shared wall between the rooms, and the sound of bedsprings contracting sprinkled with hushed giggles interrupted for a mere second.

“I know what you mean, sugarcube, but listen, you hurt me mighty bad earlier today. Seein’ you throw yourself at that stallion-”

A loud screech, followed by exaggerated hushing noises and more...bedspringyness.

Gritting her teeth and glaring at the wall, Rarity tried to reply. “I can understand that, and I am sorry, but you spoke of me as if I were some common harlot-”

A slam, and the rhythmic sound of bedsprings.

Jade eyes studiously ignored the wall in favor of catching the white mare’s sapphire ones. “I know, but I was awful upset at the time and not thinkin’ straight-”

Rarity cut her off fiercely. “And how do you think I felt after flying through the air and thinking I was about to die-”

Thump. Squeak. Thump. Squeak. Thump. Squeak. Thump.

Applejack stomped the floor with a hoof, frustrated, as Rarity stood on the bed and glowered at her. “Well I’m sorry, Rarity! If’n you’d taken two seconds to let your self-awareness catch up with the rest of ya, then maybe-”

ThumpSqueakThumpSqueak

Shivering in irritation, Rarity tried her level best to keep her mind on the conversation. “Maybe what, Applejack? Maybe I need to run all of my stress reactions by you beforehand? Twilight did mention there were time spells in the Canterlot Archives-”

“D-Dashie!” thumpsqueakthumpsqueak

“Oh, bein’ a smart-flank now, huh?” Applejack thrust her face directly into Rarity’s to keep the mare’s attention. “I just wish you’d not default to hangin’ yourself all over whatever stallion is in the vicinity when you need somethin’-”

“I BEG YOUR PARDON, APPLEJACK! Watch your tone-”

thumpthumpthumpthumpthump-

“I will NOT! I am angry! I can use whatever sort of tone I like!” Applejack made sure to shout this last towards the wall, so there could be no bones about how many directions her anger was currently flowing in.

“Well so am I!”

thump.

A beat of silence. The two mares squared off at each other, eyes locked. A voice floated through the walls, high and clear.

“Wow Dashie! You really ARE the fastest in Equestria!”

Applejack and Rarity both froze, eyes still locked, trying desperately to keep their angry countenances.

SLAM. stompstompstompstomp “Dashie, wait! It’s a good thing! You’ll make the Wonderbolts for sure!”

A snerk.

A giggle.

A matter of seconds found the two mares falling together, faces collapsing into gigantic grins and inappropriate laughter.

Giving in completely, they laid together on the bed, forelegs around each other as they laughed at Pinkie’s more and more confused pleas down the stairwell and then out the window with that novelty megaphone she had. The tension released, and the two finally felt at peace for the first time since the twister hit the balloon.

Laughter slowing, Applejack giggled once more and shook her head. “Hey, Rares?”

“Hmm?” A white hoof covered her mouth as she tried to keep more of her giggles from pouring out.

“I really am mighty sorry for overreactin’”.

“And I’m sorry for behaving in such a manner and hurting you.” Blue eyes met green, locking with a look of love instead of anger.

A crooked smile wound it’s way across the farmpony’s face as she took a deep breath. “THANKS PINKIE, GET SOME SLEEP NOW, Y’HEAR?”

Gales of laughter washed across them again, Rarity shushing her marefriend, but for once not really minding a bit of uncouthness. Movements interspersed with giggles, the two slid beneath the sheets together, tangling together in a soft pile of limbs.


Pinkie Pie slowly trotted back into her now empty room. Her megaphone fell against the floor and she jumped onto her wreckage of a bed. She sighed.

“Well I guess it’s true. She’s not a wingpony, she really is a leader!”

Author's Note:

Hey everyone, I'm glad you're enjoying the story! This was written in about an hour by Coz and I, and he did the brunt of the polishing, so you should go watch him/read his stories because he's very talented.

My own more serious stories will be updating once I feel better and can concentrate on them.

Spoilers in the comments? Spoilers in the comments.

Comments ( 50 )

Is that picture and those tags implying a RarityxThunderlane ship?

Ahahahahah LOLNOPE!

SoarinXThunderlane forever, why else would he want to join the wonderbolts?

Now to actually read the fic...

1792950 SoarinMac forever man

1792952 BigmacxBreaburn. usosillehdancah.

What am I even doing here

1792959

InsertrandomshipinvolvingBraeburnhere

Hahaha, surely you musn't be serious, as the ship I just stated is truly the greatest.

1792958 i love you too

1792959 ew, relation relations, no thank you (unless it's shininglight)

1792963 oh, you

1792966 InsertshippinginvolvingwhoeveryoushippedwithBreaburnherewithsomeoneelse

YOUSOSILLEH, MAHBOI. Clearly the shipping I stated is OTP.

1792971

inb4Regidar.

1792970 everypony's gay for brae

1792969 Ohrly? Done. :3... Crap, now I want to write that out...

1792979 Except that one fuck. That one fuck who's a dog.

1792982 do eeet. i can edit the clop part if you want :rainbowwild:

1792983 winona is female so that's irrelevant

THIS COMMENT THREAD IS NOW CIRCLEJERK

1792985 Ehh.... I might do it this weekend if I can get the motivation to do it. Who knows. (Yes, I am actually discussing the possibility of creating clop. WHAT HAVE YOU DONE TO ME.)

1792994 HAHAHAHAHA~ No.

1793000 YOU ARE DRIVING ME TO WRITE CLOP. MENOLIKEYTHIS.

ALRIGHT EVERYPONY, STOW IT

1792994

THAT'S RIGHT!

Stow it away and save it for later.

1792992 nothing you can complain about

YAY HORSE WORDS

HEY DANCER IT GOT PUBLISHED ALREADY

BET YOU WANTED IT TO HAPPEN WHEN YOU WOKE UP BUT LOLNOPE

NOW IT'S UP WHEN NO-ONE'S ONLINE

HAVE FUN WITH OBSCURITY

SHIFT KEY IS BEST PONY

NOW GOODNIGHT

1793079
Raise the moon with that voice will ya? I mean for reals man, you're going to wake up MD

Also, best fic is best fic.

:moustache: : I am Spike's moustache, and this is my favourite fic on FimFiciton

Wow, you work quick, good fic.


That totally rhymed

Just because everypony else is doing it...

inB4Regidar, mofos! :pinkiecrazy:

Oh God that ending!

1793079 I DON'T ACTUALLY SLEEP ARRAY, YOU KNOW DIS

1793141 We remembered that with every new episode, there was a fic up within an hour of premiere/the leak of the episode, so we thought we'd try it :)

1793803 ...is the best ending! :raritywink:

1794033 Oh mirror pool and all your fanfic possibilities

1794068 I'll add it to the pile

and to be totally fair, most of the good writing in the first part of this fic was all Coz, while the sex joke in the last half was mostly me haha, so I bet Coz could do that story idea too if he weren't my favorite lazy lord of chaos

Five fucking stars man.

1794075

I would do it if I weren't trying to write three other things.

Why did you make a fic about an episode that's not officially released yet?

1795084 Because I've already watched that episode. And I put that it's spoilery, so after that point if you read that's on you tbh :rainbowkiss:

i dont get it. was pinky in ajs room to or did she go to rainbow then back to her room?:pinkiegasp::rainbowwild:

1799279 AJ and Rarity shared a room which was next door to Pinkie's room. Dash showed up to Pinkie's room while AJ and Rarity were fighting. All of this was audible because hotel rooms have the shittiest walls ever, which I know from experience.

o ok now i get it. doink:derpytongue2::twilightblush:

Named off the famous comment by Regidar.

1828574 Then why is it an option to tack it onto a Teen story? The option opens up if the rating's higher than Everyone. Same with Gore.

1794068 psst, writing it now :3 giving you credit for the inspiration. Not telling which pony I'm using, though ;)

2121623 Huzzah! I hope you enjoy it when I post it/it gets approved.

This was absolutely hilarious! I had a seriously good laugh while reading this story. Excellent writing and spot-on humor. :pinkiehappy:

This is exactly the humor i was looking 4 nice job:pinkiehappy::pinkiehappy::pinkiehappy::pinkiehappy::pinkiehappy::pinkiehappy::pinkiehappy::pinkiehappy:

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