Chapter 8
& & &
Everypony gathered in a circle as the game of Truth or Dare got underway. Pinkie Pie giggled. "I'm so excited, are you excited, 'cause we're gonna have a great time doing a bunch of silly dares and some silly truths...hm, can the truth be silly? I dunno...but anyway we're all gonna bond together and be really close friends forever and ever and ever!" She squeed. "You'll see, nothing brings pony together like laughter!"
"Heh, whatever you say, Pinks." Rainbow Dash grinned. “I’ll go first!”
Twilight’s love of order couldn’t help but object. “But shouldn’t we start in alphabetical order? Or what about Cadence? She’s a princess…”
“Twilight,” Cadence smiled, reaching over to give her a nuzzle. “When I’m with you, I’m not Princess Mi Amore Cadenza. I’m just Cadence.”
The lavender unicorn beamed and nuzzled her back. “Okay…” Rainbow felt something stir in her gut as she watched Twilight and Cadence interact. First Shining Armor, now her friends? A quick stab of resentment made her flinch before she shook her head. She was being stupid, Twilight knew Cadence before they had ever met. And Cadence was a great pony. There was no need to be…“Cadence!” Rainbow blurted out, trying to cut her own train of thought off before it arrived at its destination. “Truth or dare?”
Cadence looked up at her, her eyes twinkling with mischief. “Dare.”
“I dare you…” Rainbow’s face lit up. “…to do that thing. You know the one.”
The pink unicorn flushed, looking surprised at her. “That silly thing?” She chuckled. “Only for you, Dash…” the princess stood up and cleared her throat. Taking a deep breath she began belching the Equestrian anthem. “The fiiiire of friiieeendship liiiives in our heeeaarts! As loooong as it buuuuurns, we can noooot drift apaaaart!”
Every jaw in the train hit the ground at Cadence’s considerable skill and volume in burping. Rainbow was the only one not watching in horrified awe as she hugged herself with glee and started rolling on the ground with laughter. By the time Cadence reached the end, Dash was in tears.
“C-cadence.” Shining Armor was dumbstruck. “That—you—how?!” Everypony else nodded as he spoke for all of them.
Well, almost all. “I can do that!” Pinkie announced. “But only it comes out of the other end. Wanna see?” She started to get up.
“NO!” Everypony shouted at once, making Pinkie sit back down with a pout.
Blushing brilliantly, Cadence rubbed her neck. “Well, back when I was foalsitting for Rainbow Dash she liked to have a lot of contests and games. It was just about the only way to get her to agree to do anything. One night we were drinking sodas and well, one thing led to another,” She grinned. “It was one of the few times I could beat Dashie. She had to keep running to the bathroom after every soda.” Cadence winked at Rainbow, who was now blushing as the princess gave a falsetto whisper. “She has a tiny bladder.”
“H-hey!” Rainbow blushed furiously as everypony giggled. “That’s not true!”
“Really? Remember the reception for the Saddle Arabian ambassador?” She reminded her. “You asked me if anypony would mind if you used a potted plant!” Everypony laughed as Rainbow shrank down, but Cadence mercifully moved on. “Applejack, truth or dare?”
The cowpony dipped her head. “Truth.”
Cadence thought for a minute. “What’s the best and worst part about having a big family?”
“Shucks, that is a good question!” Applejack nodded appreciatively, ignoring Rainbow mouthing ‘boring!’ AJ took off her hat to scratch her head for a moment as she thought it over. “Ah guess the best part is jest having so many ponies around that care ‘bout you and love you. Back home our family albums have t’ be labeled in volumes and the cards we get ‘round the holidays…heh, poor Ditzy has to make two trips out to the farm to deliver ‘em all!” She fiddled with her hat. “Even when…well, even when things were about as bad as they could get…A-Ah wasn’t alone.” She sniffled, very softly. Her friends all looked at each other. She didn’t like to talk about it a lot, but it was no secret that Applejack’s parents were gone.
Shining Armor and Twilight looked at each other at the same time and fell into a wordless hug, sad for Applejack and grateful that they still had their own parents. Everypony else had the same thought. Fluttershy slowly unfurled a wing around Applejack comfortingly as Pinkie Pie leaned over to give her a hug. Rarity sniffed, dabbing at her eyes with a silk kerchief and Cadence leaned her head in to gently rest it atop of the farmpony’s own. “And you’re not alone here, either.” She murmured gently.
Rainbow Dash bit her lip. Was this the time to bring it up? She opened her mouth but Applejack wiped her eyes and continued. “Thanks y’all…I ‘ppreciate that.”
The cyan pegasus looked and promptly closed her mouth with a click. The moment had passed and AJ was talking about the other half of her question.
“Ah guess the worst part is that you ain’t got any privacy ‘round a big family. ‘Specially when you’re a growing mare and…well, Ah ain’t about to go into details.” She flushed. “Anyway, ev’ry little story gets passed around and brought up every time you run inta yer kin. Baby photos are passed ‘round like old bits, always turnin’ up when you least ‘xpect it. They ain’t never gonna let me live down that one time Ah ended up hogtying myself and falling into th’ pig pen.” Everypony giggled as Applejack tried to hide beneath her hat.
“Got any favorite relatives?” Rainbow asked. Technically this wasn’t in keeping with the rules of Truth or Dare, but nopony objected.
Applejack grinned. “Heh, shoot. Ah love all mah relatives, even though some of them can be grumpier than others. But Ah admit, Ah have a special place for my cousin Braeburn. He lives out in Appleloosa and boy, is he a hoot! Got more energy than a pack of rabbits that got into th’ coffee. A real great pony. He stayed with us for a while after, well...after. Then he headed west and helped found Appleloosa. Ah should go pay him a visit when this is all settled.”
A thought occurred to Rainbow. “Heh, your family being so big, did you ever have a crush on any of them before finding out you were related?”
“Ah already answered mah questions!” Applejack snorted, her red face giving the others all the answer they needed. They giggled as AJ did her best to ignore them. “Shining Armor! Truth ‘r dare?”
“Truth.” The captain nodded. “But no state secrets.”
“Well, Ah’m hoping that doesn't include telling us about how you and the Princess got together.” AJ’s eyes flickered over to Dash. ‘Sorry, sugarcube but you need to deal with this…’
Shining Armor rubbed his head. “Wow, wouldn’t you know? That’s a state secret. Sorry, you’ll have to try something el—”
“Shining Armorrrrr….” Twilight and Cadence said in unison, stretching out his name menacingly. He winced. This could only mean bad things.
He sighed. “Okay, okay. It all started the way most things around the palace do...” he shot a knowing look towards Rainbow Dash.
& & &
I was still going to West Hoof, but because I was at the top of my class I was granted the opportunity for field experience by getting a guard shift at the palace. That’s where I first met Rainbow Dash. My very first shift, she poured itching powder down my armor. Ugh, that shift was a nightmare! The palace regulars nicknamed me Scratchy Armor...hey, it wasn’t funny! Okay, maybe it was. A little.
Anyway, I became her favorite prank target and I got to know the little demon-brat pretty well. Oh, don’t look so pleased with yourself--it wasn’t exactly a compliment, Dash. When Princess Celestia was too busy to watch Dash herself, she used to have other ponies foalsit her. But Rainbow...well, you can imagine. She was always slipping in and out of trouble, flying circles around the palace staff and driving the last two foalsitters into early retirement. That’s when the Princess turned to Cadence.
I already knew Cadence from when she used to watch Twiley, but I didn’t see much of her since I went to West Hoof. It was good to see her again, but between Cadence trying to keep up with Dash and my guard shifts, we really didn’t have a chance to talk. That is, until one evening...
Shining Armor stood impassively in front of the throne room. There were times when it seemed like that was all he ever did around here. Of course this time was marked by the inevitable sniggers from his fellow guards and the palace staff as they went past. To be fair, the sight of a royal guard in bright pink armor will do that. Being on duty, he couldn’t even acknowledge their laughter. All thanks to--
“S-shiny!”
He winced. Right on cue, a small blue blurr with a high, scratchy voice plowed into him. He grunted, his armor producing a loud clatter as he fell over. “Gah! Rainbow Dash....” His admonishment was cut off by a small blue hoof inserting itself in his mouth.
“Shhh!” She whispered. “Cadence is lookin’ for me! She wants me to go to bed, but it’s waaaay too early!” She flapped her wings eagerly. “So I challenged her to a game of hide ‘n seek. If I win, I get to stay up as late as I want!” The filly grinned eagerly at him. “So I need you to distract Cadence for a bit while I get to my perfect hiding place.”
The put upon stallion groaned. “Dashie...” He got to his hooves and looked down at her. “I...” he trailed off. The tiny blue pegasus filly was looking up at him with her wide pink eyes, a hopeful smile on her face and....grah, he was such a sap! He kicked himself. If Equestria’s enemies ever harnessed the power of cute, he’d be done for. “...Fine.”
Rainbow Dash beamed and took to the air. “Great! Thanks Shiny! Remember! If you tattle, I’ll whoopee cushion you!“ He suppressed the urge to wince. That would be all he needed, a new nickname.
Throwing the filly his best parade-ground salute, Dash took her leave and zoomed off. Shining resumed his post only for another pony to run up, Princess Cadence. She looked at him oddly, her eyes widening in recognition. “Shining Armor? Is that you?”
He nodded and curtly replied in his best professional guard voice “Princess.” His ego took a hit when she started giggling instead of taking him seriously. Shining’s shoulders slumped.
“S-sorry.” She apologized. “It’s just....you were being so serious...and in that armor!” The pink pony started laughing again. Confused, Shining looked down at his armor and...oh yeah. Pink. Thanks a lot, Rainbow Dash. As if reading his mind, Cadence inquired, “Rainbow Dash’s work, I assume? Or do you simply have a thing for pink?”
Chuckling, Shining Armor shook his head. “It was Dash.”
Cadence smiled, knowingly. “Have you seen her? She’s supposed to be getting ready for bed, but she insisted on playing hide and seek first.”
“Erm...” Shining’s face twisted as he weighed the pros and cons of this situation. On the one hoof, telling the truth was generally the best policy and it would be the right thing to help Cadence out. On the other hoof, Rainbow was going to torment him if she found out he blabbed. But he didn’t have to say exactly where she was, did he? “She did go by this way.” He confirmed. “Need some help?”
“I won’t say no.” Cadence shook her head, idly straightening out her mane. “I love Dashie, but trying to keep up with her can be exhausting!”
“I know what you mean.” He fell into an easy step alongside her as they walked. “How’s Twiley doing? I don’t get to see her as much as I’d like.”
Cadence gave him a sympathetic smile. “They keeping you colts busy at West Hoof? Imagine that.” Then she gave a sad sigh. “She misses you, you know.”
“And I miss her,” Shining bit his lip. “Is she...doing any better?” He asked hopefully, only to be disappointed when his companion shook her head.
“I’m afraid not. The nightmares are becoming less frequent as are her, hm, nighttime incidents, but every attempt I make to get her to play with foals her own age ends up failing. She just digs in her her hooves and buries her muzzle even deeper in her books. It’s not healthy.” She frowned. “A filly her age should be having fun!”
Shining smiled at her supportively. “She tells me that she has lots of fun with you.”
“Flatterer.” Cadence smiled, but only for a moment. “But that’s not enough. She needs friends her own age. Besides me and you, who else does she have?” She shook her head. “It isn’t right. Twilight is punishing herself because of what happened at her entrance exam. She thinks that she’s just going to end up hurting anypony who gets near her and....Shining, it’s breaking my heart.” She sniffled, closing her eyes.
Without thinking, Shining reached over and put a hoof on her withers. “It’s okay....she’ll be all right.” In that moment he forgot that she was a princess and he was just a guard. “Twiley’s tough...you’ll see. She’ll get through this.”
Cadence wiped her face. “I know...thank you, Shining Armor.” She let out a chuckle.
Shining looked at her curiously. “What is it?”
“It’s silly.”
“Go on.”
“Okay...I can’t believe I’m going to say this...but sometimes I wish Twilight could be a little more like Rainbow Dash.” Cadence admitted with a guilty smile.
Shining Armor snorted with laughter before he could control himself. “S-sorry...didn’t mean to laugh.”
“It’s okay,” Cadence winked. “I know it’s funny. But honestly, Twilight could stand to be a little braver, a little more adventurous. Like Dash.”
“I agree,” Shining nodded. “And I wish Rainbow Dash was a little bit more thoughtful, patient and studious, like Twiley.”
Cadence tilted her head in thought. “Hm, maybe we could arrange a playdate for them?” She clopped her hooves together. “It’d be so cuuute!”
Shining chuckled. “Yeah it would. Can you imagine Dashie at a tea party with Smarty Pants, wearing a sunhat and sipping tea?” He winced as Cadence practically squealed at the image.
“That would be the most adorable thing ever!” She pronounced. Then she looked at him. “‘Dashie?’ You call her that too? Not very professional, Mr. Guard Pony.”
Sheepishly, Shining shrugged. “What? It fits. Besides, I like the little filly. She’s got a lot of spunk.”
The princess nodded. “Do you also think it’s cute how hard she tries to sound and act tough?”
“Incredibly,” he chuckled as they turned a corner.
Cadence nudged him. “Aww, you big softy.”
Blushing, Shining looked away. “Well, I-I think it’s great, what you’re doing for Dash. And for Twilight and all the other foals you sit for. Everypony loves you.”
“Really?” Cadence shot him a half-lidded smile. “Everypony?”
Blinking in confusion, it took a moment for Shining to fully absorb that. When he did, his face turned the same color as Cadence’s. “I, um, well, I suppose I--HEY! I think I know where Rainbow Dash is!” He grinned widely, running ahead. “Follow me!”
“...Don’t have to ask me twice.” Cadence uttered softly, eyeing his swaying flank.
Shining Armor led her through the winding corridors, down the steps, and out into the courtyard maze. Some quick navigating, marred by only a few missteps (Cadence grumbled when Shining Armor refused to let her lead or ask directions), and the two of them arrived at the center of the labyrinth. And there was Rainbow Dash, curled up and fast asleep on a stone bench.
Cadence walked over and gently nuzzled her. Rainbow yawned sleepily and rolled over. “Awww, her battery’s run out.” She giggled. “All that running and hiding to avoid bed tired her out!”
“Here, I got her.” Shining concentrated, his horn glowing as he carefully lifted the sleeping filly up and onto his back. She fidgeted and murmured softly in her sleep, burying her face in his neck as she snuggled up to him.
“You’ve never looked more heroic.” Cadence whispered gently as they made their way back to the castle.
Despite the pink armor he was wearing and the tiny filly gently snoring on his back, Shining Armor had never felt prouder. “After we put Rainbow Dash to bed, would you like to, um, catch up on old times?”
She leaned over and gave him a peck on his cheek. “I’d love to.”
Shining beamed and straightened his armor. Perhaps he did have a thing for pink after all...
& & &
Everypony awww’d as Shining Armor and Cadence leaned over to nuzzle each other. Everypony but one, Rarity and Applejack noticed. Rainbow was dispirited. She knew how well the two of them went together but...she gritted her teeth silently. She couldn’t let him go!
The game went on. Rarity admitted to wearing false eyelashes. Pinkie Pie was dared to act like a proper Canterlot lady for the next round. Then Twilight was dared to grow mustaches on two random ponies. It took forever to get Rarity out from under the covers. Shining Armor couldn’t even look at Cadence without shuddering. They even went around again before coming around to Fluttershy’s turn.
“C-can I just pass, please?” She asked softly.
“Aww but Fluttershyyyy!” Pinkie pouted. “I was gonna dare you to fly upside down while drinking a bottle of hot sauce!” Fluttershy meeped.
“Oh darling, Rainbow Dash already did that.” Rarity reminded her.
“I know, but it’s fun to watch!”
“Fluttershy…” Rainbow groaned, giving her a look. “Come on, everypony else is doing it! It’s really fun, I promise!”
“I—I don’t know…” she squeaked softly, crouching down. “What if I get dared to do something scary?”
Rainbow rubbed her muzzle thoughtfully. “Tell you what, what if I give you your first dare?”
“Well, I don’t—”
“Great!” Dash grinned. “Fluttershy—I dare you...”
Fluttershy bit her lip and brought her wings down over her face. “Oh really Rainbow, can’t you see that you’re scaring—” Twilight started.
“…to be as brave and assertive as I am for the rest of the night!” Rainbow announced grandly. Everypony blinked in surprise. “I know you can do it.” The blue pegasus urged. “You’ve got the right stuff.”
“O-okay, Rainbow Dash. If you say so...” Fluttershy slowly got to her hooves, determined not to let Rainbow down. She looked around. “A-Applejack, w-would you like a truth or a dare?”
Applejack nodded encouragingly. “Ah pick dare. Go ahead, Fluttershy.”
The yellow pegasus gulped. “I uh, dare you to…walk around with your eyes closed!” Seeing Rainbow facehoof, she quickly added. “And, uh…act like a bunny. Um, if that’s okay with you…”
“Heh, it’s fine, sugarcube.” AJ got up and crouched down on her hindlegs, hopping around in a circle with her eyes shut. “Uh, consarnit, what else do rabbits do?”
“Try to get to Albuquerque!” Pinkie helpfully tossed in. Applejack continued her blind-hopping circuit, occasionally bumping into a pony or a bed along the way.
“T-this is fun!” Fluttershy giggled, flapping her wings excitedly.
“Take another turn then.” AJ said encouragingly.
“O-Okay…Rainbow Dash! Truth or Dare?"
Rainbow grinned. "Dare. Hit me."
"Oh, no, I wouldn't do that!" Fluttershy exclaimed softly. "But um...I dare you to...spin around in a circle until you get dizzy."
"Come on Fluttershy!" Her friend groaned. "You can do better than that! Be daring! Bold!"
Fluttershy gulped. "O-okay! I d-dare you to...oh my...kiss Cloud Kicker when we get back home!” Everypony’s jaw hit the ground. Fluttershy gasped and almost gave herself a bruised lip as she brought up her own hooves to her mouth. She dove back to her seat, cowering under her pillow. “Sorry! I didn't mean to, I mean oh my...” she continued rambling as everypony remained frozen in shock.
“I did, but---she, I---” Dash was babbling. “Cloud Kicker will totally think I’m trying to hit on her! Oh geeze, she’s bad enough when I’m telling her I don’t like her that way and if I went up to her and kissed her she’d think, ohmygosh...”
Fluttershy meeped. “I-I’m sorry! You don’t have to...”
“Hey now, a dare’s a dare.” Applejack nudged Rainbow. “Unless of course, yer chicken.”
“Hay! No pony calls me chicken! But CK isn’t here and it’s a stupid dare...so I’m not gonna do it, so there!” She stuck out her tongue.
Twilight frowned as she thought aloud. “Hm, according to my book on slumber parties, the truth or dare section says that if you fail to perform a dare or tell a truth, then there’s a penalty.”
Rainbow grunted, hating the idea of losing. “Ugh fine ... whatever. Let's just move on." She then dared Applejack to stick her head out the window for three minutes solid. By the time she put her head back in, her mane was blown back and her eyes seemed stuck open. After helping herself to some warm tea, she was ready to continue. “Cadence, truth or dare?” Applejack asked her.
“Truth.”
“Why would a princess spend her time foalsitting when she could be doing anything else she wanted?”
Smiling beatifically, Cadence replied, “Because, foalsitting is what I wanted to do the most. I love children…being a princess really doesn’t require you to do all that much. And unless you’re like Prince Blueblood, having ponies fawn all over you get’s really irritating, really fast. But children don’t worry about what’s proper or all the worries and concerns that adults have. They just saw me as Cadance, their foalsitter. They liked me, trusted me...plus I got fridge privileges.” She smiled, chuckling. “One day I hope to have lots of foals of my own.” Off to the side, Shining Armor winced as if deeply pained. Fortunately, Cadence didn’t seem to notice. “I would trade all the balls and galas in the world to get to read bedtime stories with Twilight snuggled up next to me, or scrubbing down a filthy Rainbow Dash after she spent her time splashing around in mud puddles.”
“Awwww….” Everypony sighed as Twilight and Rainbow blushed adorably. “Heh, I bet you got some great stories of foalsitting these two.” Applejack commented.
Cadence beamed. “Oh, tons! Why I remember this one time when Twilight kept trying to sneak out of bed to read by her night-light…she wanted to get to wear glasses because she thought they looked neat!” Twilight’s cheeks blossomed red as she squirmed.
“Well, they do…” She pouted adorably.
The pink unicorn nuzzled her. “You look amazing enough without having to ruin your eyesight.” She smiled. “And Rainbow Dash, oooh the mischief that filly got into! Once she crashed a reception thinking that it was really a surprise party for her birthday! Fortunately Fancy Pants was most understanding...” Rainbow rubbed her neck, coloring as everypony chuckled at the cute image of a little filly Rainbow Dash bursting into a grand reception. The foalsitter chuckled. “I could go on for days. When Twilight was young, every night she would—”
Rainbow hissed. “Cadence!” She looked at her reproachfully. “Um, isn’t that a bit private?” She spared Twilight a glance. After Trixie rubbed her nose in it when she came to Ponyville, Rainbow wanted to spare Twilight any further embarrassment.
Nonplussed, Cadence blinked. “I don’t think it was that big a deal…you did it yourself when you were younger.”
That made Rainbow’s cheeks heat up. “No I didn’t!” She protested heatedly. “How can you even SAY that?”
Genuinely confused, Cadence tipped her head to the side. “But you did! You used to sleep with a stuffed Wonderbolt toy just like Twilight used to sleep with her Smarty Pants doll. It’s not a big deal, Dashie. Everypony does when they’re little.”
“Ooohh.” Rainbow wiped her head, sagging in relief. “Heh. So that’s what you meant.”
“Of course, what did you think I meant?” Cadence wondered.
Dash chuckled at herself. “Heh, I was afraid you were talking about how Twilight used to wet the be—”
“RAINBOW!” Twilight wailed, her face reddening in embarrassment as she ducked down in shame.
Shining Armor and Cadence shot Dash a synchronized glare that made the pegasus wilt in place. “I-I’m sorry, Twi—I didn’t mean to…” She reached out with a hoof only to have Twilight shy away.
“It…it’s okay.” Twilight bit her lip. “I know you didn’t intend to…” She rubbed her snout as her face was still lit up in a fierce blush. The rest of her friends shot Rainbow Dash a disapproving glower.
“Twi, I—look, I’ll do anything you want to make up for this. Really, you name it and I’ll do it.”
Cadence leaned down and whispered something into Twilight’s ear. The smaller unicorn giggled and nodded. “Okay!” She looked over at Rainbow Dash. Smiling sweetly, with just a hint of mischief, she announced. “I dare you to do the special Ladybug dance!”
“What?!” Rainbow sputtered. “B-but—that’s just for fillies!” She objected without thinking. The last thing she wanted was for Shining Armor to think of her as a just a little filly! Unfortunately she forgot about one important detail. Twilight lowered her head and let out a whimper before she could help herself. “No, no I’m sorry, I’m sorry!” Rainbow apologized quickly. “I’ll do it, I’d love to do it!” She gave a sickly smile as she stood up, not noticing Cadence’s horn glowing.
Seeing Twilight smile again, Rainbow went on to do the dance with the most forced expression possible. “Sunshine, sunshine ladybugs awake. Clap your hooves and do a little shake.” She turned around and started shaking when everypony started bursting into laughter. “What?”
“S-sugarcube,” Applejack wheezed between breaths. “Y-ya forgot to do up yer rear flap!”
Her cheeks reddening, Rainbow turned her head to check for herself. Sure enough, the back flap of her hoofsie was hanging open. Right after she had finished shaking her rump at her friends and…Shining Armor. Letting out an impressive Fluttershy-like squeak, the red-faced pegasus lowered herself to the ground as if trying to sink through the floor. “I--I knew that! It was all just...a joke...”
Cadence reached over and gave her a hug. “It—it’s okay.” She bit down a giggle, her horn glowing again as she did it back up. “You okay, Dashie? It was just a little prank, okay?”
“O-oh yeah. Heh, yeah. Good one.” Rainbow flushed, her eyes refusing to meet Cadence's. Her former foalsitter frowned, reaching out a hoof to comfort her. But the blue pony turned away to look at the lavender unicorn. “So, uh, we cool Twilight?”
“Yeah,” her friend nodded as she walked over to give the cyan pony a hug. “We’re cool.”
“Awesome.” Rainbow hugged her back. “Of course, if it’d been me, I would’ve given you a totally wicked dare. My dares are the best.”
Twilight gave a conciliatory nod and smile. “I know…”
“And not every pony is as awesome with dares as me. I'm fearless!” Rainbow grinned, flexing and shooting a grin Shining Armor’s way. He shook his head and chuckled at her antics. Same old Rainbow...he failed to notice the disappointed look on her face at his casual dismissal.
“You haven't tried a truth yet.” Fluttershy observed. “I mean...it’s okay if you don't want to...”
“Hah! I can take any truth. I'm an open book. Ask me anything!” Dash pounded her hoof to her chest.
Rarity’s eyes gleamed. She surreptitiously whispered something in Pinkie’s ear. The party pony’s eyes lit up. “Ooooh that’s a good one!” She whispered back before pulling her head away. “Hehehee. O-kaaaay....” Pinkie grinned mischievously at Rainbow Dash. “Any stallions in Ponyville you liiiike?”
Rainbow gulped, her eyes darting quickly to Shining Armor and away again. “Uh...can I change it to dare?”
Pinkie thought about it. “Hmm…m’okay!" Rarity frowned at Pinkie's willingness to let her off the hook. At least, until the pink pony added. "Dare you to kiss him when we get back.”
“...You are evil.” The pegasus gritted her teeth. “Completely evil.”
The pink pony giggled and threw her hooves around her, smothering her with a big hug. “Aww Dashie, I'm just funnin ya. I'm sure Big Macintosh will be so happy to see you, he'll smooch ya himself.”
Rainbow Dash and Applejack wore matching expressions of shock and horror, their faces turning identical shades of red. “What?!”
Applejack recovered first. “Where'd you get a fool idea like that?!”
“He's a catch.” Pinkie shrugged casually. “Bet he gets Hearts and Hooves letters all the time, right?”
The orange cowpony felt something snap in her brain as she realized what those bags of mail Ditzy had dropped off last Hearts and Hooves Day were about. Then the thought of Dash fussing over her brother filled her head. “Oh Celestia, the horror…” She shuddered, thinking of a horde of lazy or over energized Mini-Dashes alternatively wrecking the farm and napping in the trees.
Rainbow’s face turned the color of a ripe apple as she spied Shining Armor chuckling. “I—it’s not like that! I mean, he’s a…and…”
“Should Cloud Kicker be jealous?” He teased gently, making her squirm. “When we get back to Ponyville, I’ll have to meet this Big Macintosh. See if he’s good enough for you, threaten to break his legs--the usual. It’s in the big brother rule book.”
Twilight and Cadence giggled. “Ooh, you!” Twilight chuckled as Cadence cuffed his ears playfully. Rainbow didn’t know whether to feel buoyed by Shining’s concern for her...or to be dismayed by the fact that he said it in a big brother tone. Oh right, then there was the embarrassment factor. That won out over both. She groaned.
“Come now, Rainbow.” Rarity purred like Opal. “It’s not as if there’s anypony else you’re holding a torch for, is there?”
In a matter of seconds, the prismatic pony’s face went from bright red to a ghostly pale white. Applejack bit her lip. She felt that Rainbow needed to talk to Shining Armor and Cadence about her lingering crush as much as Rarity did, but this wasn’t the way to go about it. “Twilight!” Applejack almost shouted. “Truth ‘r dare?”
Fortunately, it appeared that Twilight was quicker on the uptake than her brother. “Dare.” She paused. “If it avoids hot sauce.” She added.
Rainbow, grateful for the distraction, snorted at her. “Wimp.” She teased.
“I don't like hot sauce.” Twilight fidgeted. “I get...gas.” Shining Armor gave a brief nod in confirmation.
“I dare ya...to hogtie Rarity!” Applejack grinned, grabbing her rope out of her saddlebag.
Rarity shrieked. “WHAT!?”
Twilight smiled as she used her magic to float the rope over to her. “No problem. Relax, Rarity this won’t take a minute…now, this goes under here, or is it over and then under? Hmm…” Amidst mumbled fussing and general laughter, the two unicorns soon found themselves trussed up back to back. “This isn't right.” Twilight noted with some dismay.
Shining coughed, trying to suppress his laughter. “Oooo!” Pinkie waved her hoof in the air. “Me next, me next!”
After another minute, punctuated by grumbling and squirming, Twilight and Rarity finally freed themselves. Twilight in particular was in a real mood for being laughed at. “Okay, BBBFF...Truth or Dare.”
“What'd I do?” Shining asked, clueless.
“Truth. Or. Dare.” His sister repeated, her eyes narrowed.
“Dare.” Shining responded with a grin…one Twilight returned with twice as much force.
“I dare you....to do the Ladybug Dance, followed by your best Princess Celestia impression.” Rainbow’s wings flared open in shock right before she fell over on her back, kicking her legs and laughing madly.
Shining Armor’s jaw dropped. He was dimly aware of Cadence giggling. “You can't be serious.”
“It’s in the rules. You have to.” Twilight smirked. “Or do you want to pay the penalty too?”
Rainbow Dash looked far too pleased at the prospect. Shining groaned. “Fiiine…” Putting on his bravest face, he took a step forward into the circle of young mares. He did his best to act very suave and unconcerned…but he was blushing up a storm as the girls laughed and cheered.
“Yeehaw! Getalong little pony!” Applejack hooted, waving her hat in the air.
“Shake it! Shake it!” Pinkie giggled as he came to the final part of the dance. He moaned, hoping his guards never found out about this.
Cadence was holding both her hooves over her face as she giggled as well. “Anypony have any bits?” She teased, only to act surprised when a hooffull of bits landed at her feet.
Twilight giggled but there was some awkwardness in seeing her big brother get hit on by...well, essentially everypony present but her. Shining Armor had the same thought. “C’mon you guys.” He pleaded. “My little sister is right here!”
At the words ‘little sister’ the manticore in the room that everypony had been doing their best to ignore pounced. “Sweetie always enjoyed a good slumber par--” Rarity started before falling silent. “I’m sorry.”
Applejack sighed. “Ah reckon Apple Bloom does too. Not a pony fer frilly frou-frou dress up s'far as Ah know. But she could really pack away the vittles.”
The happy atmosphere leaked out of the train like a punctured balloon. Fluttershy looked at the ground sadly as she gently leaned against Rarity. Pinkie’s eyes watered and she hugged Applejack fiercely. Twilight put a hoof on Rainbow’s back, but the dour pegasus refused to acknowledge that she needed any such support. But she didn’t reject it either.
Cadence and Shining Armor exchanged a look. The stallion nodded. He knew what must be done...though he may pay a heavy price in the bargain, it was his duty as a defender of the realm. “So, now for my impression of Princess Celestia.” Shining Armor’s cheeks stretched painfully as he tried to smile nonchalantly. “My little ponies…” he made his voice as light and airy as he could manage. “How wonderful it is to see you all…”
Everypony started chuckling softly as he began delicately walking around on the very edge of his hooves, trying to make himself seem taller. “Come on Shining, you can do better than that.” Cadence teased. “Shake those flanks a little. You'll never get a stallion if you walk so stiff.” Wincing at the blow to his dignity, Shining did as his fillyfriend bade and was rewarded with chuckles circling through the room.
“Just pretend you are at the ball.” Rarity offered helpfully, a smile gracing her face again. “Your prince charming is casting his eyes over you…leaving him breathless….” she purred.
“And, um mmmaybe a l-little p-pout?” Fluttershy offered helpfully, giggling slightly.
Despite plastering a wide smile on his face, Shining felt a tiny piece of his soul die. Fluttershy was teasing him now. Testosterone levels...falling...falling...gone. Could this get any worse?
“Y’know Ah don’t think he can really pull off actin’ like Princess Celestia.” Applejack mused.
“You’re just saying that because he doesn’t look the part,” Rarity returned. Then her face lit up. “Ooh, that’s an idea! A make-over!”
Somehow Shining Armor’s white-coated face became even paler. “W-what?!”
“Um, well, he does have a nice mane.” Fluttershy noted demurely.
“Twilight...” Shining looked to his sister, to see her looking upwards as she tried to remember something.
“Well,” she mused. “It IS in the official book on slumber parties...” a tiny little grin crossed her muzzle.
“Whooee!” Applejack chuckled, patting Shining Armor’s shoulder. “Sorry sugarcube, you’re plumb out of luck. Better you than me anyways.”
Seeing the grinning circle of mares start to close in on him, Shining desperately cast his eyes about looking for an avenue of escape and, finding none, looked for allies. Pinkie’s wide grin and the merciless smirk on Cadence’s face doomed that hope quickly. “Dashie...” He pleaded imploringly.
Rainbow Dash thought about it. Normally the idea of having Shining owe her one was something she’d enjoy having. But after the bomb he’d dropped on her yesterday, plus all the needling he’d done that night, she was going to enjoy herself. This was the prank to end all pranks. “Don’t forget the hooficures!” She smiled. For once, she was going to take part in a makeover, willingly.
Before Shining could get another word in, Pinkie upended a container of glitter into his mane. “Ooooh! Shiny! Heehee, really shiny! He’s shiny Shining Armor! No wait, he’s Bedazzled Armor!”
“How marvelous!” Rarity agreed as she applied an emery board to his hoof. Twilight giggled as Cadence held up a container of hoof polish with her magic and started dabbing it on his hooves.
“D-do you think he looks better with red lipstick, or pink?” Fluttershy asked as she held the implement up.
“Ah got the, lesse here...” she looked at the label. “Mascara.”
Rainbow Dash stood over him, holding a powder puff with her wings. “And the blush! I got the blush!” Not that Shining Armor needed any by this point.
As the train continued chugging northwards, the sound of merriment and laughter accompanied the rattling train tracks. Everypony (save perhaps a certain captain of the guard) made sure to enjoy this moment of fun to the utmost, suspecting that it might be the last one they would have on this quest.
They didn’t know how right they were.
& & &
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Man Pinkie, if you think Big Mac is such a catch, you should go after him yourself.
loved it keep up the awesome awkward humor
denver.mylittlefacewhen.com/media/f/img/mlfw2604-Luna_saw_what_you_did_there.jpg
So many feels!
And we're only just getting started!
Bear with it, Shining Armor. It's for a good cause.
That last line made this go through my head:
Fluttershy gulped. "O-okay! I d-dare you to...oh my...kiss Cloud Kicker when we get back home!”
Fanservice. Fanservice everywhere. Not that that's a bad thing, I'm actively hoping we get to see it happen.
"Aww Dashie, I'm just funnin ya. I'm sure Big Macintosh will be so happy to see you, he'll smooch ya himself.”
Good thing this game didn't go on much longer, Dashie might have had to kiss half the town.
This chapter was much more adorable and much less awkward than I had anticipated. Filly Dashie makes every story better. Incidentally, after that scene with her taking out the aristocrat girl in the first story , her mother/daughter relationship with Celestia, reading A Camping We Will Go, and seeing her reaction to Applejack talk about her parents I am 99.999% sure Rainbow is an orphan in this story even if I don't think it's been explicitly stated yet.
Hm, Pinkie started the tickle dogpile... I suppose that just because Dash is (probably) heterosexual in this story doesn't mean that Pinkie is, and given her feelings for Dash in the Winningverse, hm. Of course Pinkiedash is my OTP so I'm probably just hanging onto any scraps I can get and probably seeing what isn't there. A guy can hope, can't he?
Very funny and heartwarming, looks like the intrigue is going to spike in the next few chapters though.
I can't help but feel that these chapters are little more than filler.
Yes this was funny...but can we get moving?
Looks like the adventure gets back on track next chapter, but this was an entertaining little side trip.
And maybe Pinkie should change her name to Pervy Pie. With those dirty, dirty thoughts hidden behind those sparkling blue eyes
and the voluminous hair of a temptress... *cough* sorry, got a little off-track there.
*flash forward*
Look CK, before you get the wrong idea, this is just business.
Just let me get this over with quickly!
Go Dashie! Make those tongues dance!
CK: Hey boss, looking for a celebratory banging?
CK: Huh?
1873260
now there's one I haven't seen, pinkie/mac... MacinPie?
1873703
you keep your horseshoes on, this is some quality filler here!
Oh yes. fc04.deviantart.net/fs70/i/2012/216/4/5/tea_party_dashie_by_johnjoseco-d59unmv.jpg
Huh, so Pinkie ships MacDash, interesting.
1874189 I prefer Kinky Pie.
1874237
Macinpie?
...yeah, there'll be be a Mac in a Pie to be sure!
1874417 Ooh, you're right. That is much better, and I feel ashamed of myself for not remembering it sooner.
There's something I've been wondering. Does Cadence not have wings in this universe? Because she's just been referred to as a unicorn so far in this story. And if she doesn't have wings, than how's Shining going to throw the Heroic Hail Mary like he did in the climax of the season premier?
Oh god, that was hilarious. The whole mess of truth and dares were all fantastic, and the ending with Shiny getting a makeover was perfect.
Also, I am really hoping to see some more action with Cloud Kicker down the line because she is always awesome and it looks like a real relationship between her and Rainbow could very well happen down the line which would be fantastic.
I just had a question pop up about this that is unlikely to be directly answered in the story. I am wondering what you are planning on doing with Cloud Kicker now that you have broken the normal timeline which had her get into a relationship with Fluttershy and then explode in a fight with Rainbow Dash. It was fairly clear that this mess caused CK some serious emotional trauma which prevented her from getting into a real relationship and heavily influenced her attitudes towards sex, but with Celestia grabbing Rainbow right after the Rainboom those events would be drastically changed so I was wondering how things played out there and how the changes will influence the characters.
That all went better than expected.
Poor Dashie, though... Or should I say "Flashie"?
At least it's nothing that doesn't get displayed normally for a pony.
Whoo, now 100% caught up with the Dashverse. Another solid and hilarious chapter. Though hopefully the train ride will end sooner or later, there are foals to save!
Also I'm a bit curious if any of this ship teasing will amount to anything.
1875479
Not the author, but I'll offer an opinion on the matter. I'd say that Dashverse Cloud Kicker is probably much less commitment-phobic thanks to the absence of the Flight Camp Incident in this timeline. She still likes banging around and having lots of fun casual sex, but she wouldn't have Winningverse Cloud Kicker's massive commitment issues. Given the way CK generally thinks pretty highly of Rainbow Dash, I could definitely see the two of them hooking up if Dash were interested and willing.
As for Dash's apparent heterosexuality, she wouldn't be the first straight mare to end up in Cloud Kicker's bed. CK has something of a knack for convincing ponies to make an exception to their normal orientation.
1876796 No problem, you are kind of the authority on Cloud Kicker anyways.
I was kind of figuring she was less concerned about commitments (although she did still freak out about joining the guard) so a relationship with Rainbow is a very real possibility that I very much hope to see explored down the line.
That said, it does leave a huge question about Fluttershy because without RD and that fight the relationship would not have ended there, and without that it makes me wonder what happened between the two of them and where they stand.
1877772
I'm not sure if the relationship between Cloud Kicker and Fluttershy happened at all.. After all, their hook-up in the Winningverse was a fairly spur-of-the-moment thing, so with all the changes you'd get in any AU it's certainly possible that the two of them just never got together in the Dashverse.
1878060 That makes sense, and it would tie up most of the loose ends there. Just not having any of that happen at all makes things a whole lot easier, and the only major change (outside of the obvious changes in Rainbow Dash) is that Cloud Kicker does not have as strong a fear of commitment.
*Sigh*... I'm not going to say that this chapter wasn't good. As a matter of fact, it wasn't not good, but...
Trinary, is there even a point to Chapter 8? I mean just look at it. The whole group does sleepover stuff, laughs are had, often at the expense of others (And when I say others, I mean that Rainbow Dash gets a disproportionate amount, especially compared to Fluttershy who gets off scot-free). At best, certain sources of tension and anxiety are alluded to, and a few might just fester a bit, so maybe there's a tiny bit of plot development in here. At worst, this entire chapter is nothing but a rehash of the last one. When I reached the end of Chapter 7, I thought that the game of truth-or-dare would force Rainbow to reveal her lingering feelings for Shining Armor to Cadance, but nothing happened. This entire chapter is filler, and I can't help but think that Chapter 7 is also filler.
Aaarrgghh this is so cute that my brain is exploding.
It's nice to see something this adorable among all the clop and grimdark. Moar please! 
You read Burlap too, didn't you?
[ you gets ]
This chapter was brilliant, and I feel bad for Shining.
Oh Celestia. Feels. Feels from nowhere. How did I no see that coming?
Missed a period.
So would I...
Misses a return.
I was laughing so hard in places that I couldn't read... Good job! And to everyone that complained that it was filler: so what, it was awesome funny filler that was enjoyable to read.
This...went better than expected. Looks like Dash'll have to practice her make-out skills for when she gets back to Ponyville
And oh God, the cringe humor. When she unknowingly dropped trow and did the ladybug dance I had to take a break or subject my computer screen to an impromptu Gatorade shower. This was a nice little break (I'm partial to Mane Six sleepover fics, just because they always result in so much shenanigans) and I'm glad you included it before the serious business adventure part starts. Well, I think I can fit one more chapter in before bed... onward!
1878679>>1878060
While at the making of this comment I am not up to date in the Dashverse, I am in the Winningverse. The problem, imo, that sunk the CK and FS relationship was FS not talking to CK about her misgivings about what was going on between them. Without RD there to be FS's go-to-gal the next best choice would have been either Ditzy or an other councilor. Seeing as how hard it was to find a regular councilor I think FS would have asked Ditzy about it. The real question being how long would the CK+FS thing would go on before FS finally went to Ditzy about her questions? Even if Ditzy handles it well it could have still have ended the relationship between FS and CK if FS thought it was wrong. That would still be fuel for CK to have commitment issues if she handled it poorly.
I am not a proofreader or helper in either of these stories, but it seems like this would be the most reasonable circumstance to still create a vaguely similar CK between these two verses. Being not involved in the creation process also means that I have no expertise in the matters of either characterization of these two and could very well be mistaken.
“O-oh yeah. Heh, yeah. Good one.” Rainbow flushed, her eyes refusing to meet Cadence's. Her former foalsitter frowned, reaching out a hoof to comfort her. But the blue pony turned away to look at the lavender pegasus. “So, uh, we cool Twilight?”
This needs to be edited, Twilight is a Unicorn (at least in this universe) and not a Pegasus. XS
DAMN YOU AND YOUR CLIFFHANGERS!!!
You mean alicorn?
This reminds me about my first and last time playing Truth Or Dare. That was the same occasion:
It was back in Junior High School, we stallions saw Truth Or Dare as an opportunity to loose our virginities. We dared the mares to have sex with us. Not only did we not get laid, but the mares refused to play Truth Or Dare with us ever again.
1873482
In the previous story, the rest of the Mane 6, Cloud Kicker, Dinky Doo, and Ditzy Doo met her parents, so not, Rainbow Dash is not an orphan in this universe.
First time reading this story, and it's great so far, and boy do I gotta tell ya.
Rainbow doing the ladybug dance was HIlarious, and it hit me like a ton of bricks, mainly do to the fact that I had seen the pic before reading the story.lol
Anyway on to moar good story!!!
This chapter=
so many references, especially Bugs Bunny! You sly dog, you!
Why not?
"ANTIE APPLEJACK ANTIE APPLEJACK ANTIE APPLEJACK ANTIE APPLEJACK ANTIE APPLEJACK..."
R.I.P. Shining Armor.
lol, okay. This seemed a lot better than last chapter to me. Nice recovery. ;)
Padding padding padding, padding padding padding.
also pinkie, stop fueling my tory pet peeve, The Misunderstanding. stop it.
1876796
That is true for both things.
Which is why I like Dashverse CK (I may have said this already), and would really like to see more stories with her in them.
And adorkable Twilight is adorkable
And Shining summons Murphy ...
That's not ominous at all ...
We all know Cheerle sent them all
Maturity, maturity...
When will Dash get over Shining and realize Twi is her soul mate?