Ch 02
Just one week.
Fanfic by englishwitch
Disclaimer: The following is an entirely fan-created parody. My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic, it’s characters and all other affiliated merchandise are the intellectual property of Lauren Faust and Hasbro. Please support the official MLP: FiM show.
I make no profit, or money at all, for the production and distribution of this fanfiction.
Now edited by DerpyDash2131
Chapter 2
The sun was beginning to set in the west, and the moon was rising in the east. Despite the emergency, the princesses were keeping up their usual duties.
Twilight looked to the distant mountain where Canterlot clung like perching dragon. The whole city had been sealed in an enormous shield. The giant sphere of glowing pink light, which was almost invisible in the glow of the sunset, was slowly becoming more noticeable as the daylight faded. When she looked closely, she could see small holes appearing and disappearing, like ripples on a pond. Chariots were still leaving, as the last of Canterlot’s citizens were being evacuated.
Spike sat at her side on the bench, napping. The poor dragon had been tired out after four hours of frantic, non-stop, cleaning, lifting, and carrying, as they’d made the library fit to receive her parents. Twilight had set up the double guest bed, which she hadn’t used since her very first slumber party with Rarity and Applejack. While Spike had made the beds, Twilight had spent a frantic afternoon buying some of her parents favourite foods. The hardest part had been finding the one brand of tea her mother liked to drink. Apparently, it was near-impossible to find outside Canterlot. Luckily, Rarity had a supply she’d been happy to give away.
Being uprooted from your home, even for a brief week, would be hard on anypony. Twilight had made a long list of home comforts for her parents to ease the burden. When they arrived at the library, they were going to be welcomed by the smell of apple cinnamon rolls, made according to Great Granny Twilight’s recipe. It was pretty much the only thing Twilight could make, or at least make well. Cooking had never been a talent for her, but it was tradition for the women in the family to make the delicious pastries and the recipe to be passed down, mother to daughter. Twilight fondly remembered her fillyhood, carefully following the written instructions of the recipe. Cooking wasn’t her thing, but she could follow instructions like a boss. When Mother Twilight saw her daughter didn’t have the chef’s instinct for improvisation and measuring by eye, she had almost worried she’d never be able to pass on the famous recipe. All it had taken was a little adaptation. A stroke of genius on her mothers part. She’d practically turned the cooking session into a full-blown potions lesson, with precise steps, measurements, temperatures and everything carefully marked and written down, right down to the number of times the dough needed to be stirred. Under the lesson plan, Twilight had flourished and, while her cinnamon buns were never quite as good as her mothers cooking, they were still good enough to live up
to the reputation set down by Great Granny Twilight.
Twilight looked left and right; the train station was still quite busy. Ponies had been arriving from Canterlot all day. Many stayed on the train and rode to other cities, but a fair number did get off in Ponyville. Almost all of them just milled around the small station without a clue what to do or where to go. Some of them had caught onto initiative fast enough, and they had found the local inn, or had found information on the spare rooms being offered. Others, however, just stood around waiting until somepony who had a clue what was happening took it upon themselves to guide them.
“Hi Twilight,” Applejack’s drawl cut through her thoughts. “I jus' got word from the guard, the last train jus' left Canterlot. First stop, good ol' Ponyville.”
“Thanks Applejack,” Twilight smiled. “I was getting worried.” Then she looked at the orange mare as she said, “What are you doing here?”
“Pickin' up my lodgers.” Applejack explained. “Couple of hours ago, this stallion came to the farm askin' about the room. He seemed nice enough, and when he said he was willin' to work to earn his keep,” She laughed lightly. “Granny Smith couldn’t get him inside quick enough. Heck, I think she was tryin' to set me up with him. Well, before she started bookin' the church, he managed to say he’s got a wife and a filly comin' in on the next train. He’d gone on ahead to find a place to stay while she took the time to get the little-un ready and make the move all proper like.”
Twilight nodded. Traveling quickly and traveling with a young kid didn’t often go hoof in hoof.
“I hear Pinkie is plannin' a party for your parents.” Applejack said casually.
“Tomorrow.” Twilight said with a nod. “I finally managed to persuade her my parents would want to rest tonight.”
“You managed to stop Pinkie puttin' on a party?” Applejack said doubtfully.
“Not stop, just postpone.” Twilight clarified. “I don’t think anything could stop Pinkie putting on a party. The world could be ending and Pinkie Pie would still be Pinkie Pie.”
The two laughed at that. It was easy to imagine Pinkie hosting a party as Equestria fell apart.
“Hey, you heard Rainbow Dash got a whole family of pegasus ponies livin' with her?” Applejack changed to subject to keep the conversation moving. They had time to waste until the train arrived.
“So much for giving the Wonderbolts a place to stay.” Twilight laughed.
“Oh, it gets better. They got newborn foals. Twins.” Applejack laughed along with her. “Ah heard the screamin' and cryin' on the way over here.”
“Well, it’s to be expected, babies do cry.” Twilight nodded.
“T’weren’t the babies crying.” Applejack laughed harder. “It was Rainbow. One of the foals got ahold of some of her Wonderbolt dolls and was usin' it as a pacifier. She was cryin' harder than Applebloom after she got that flu shot at the doctors.”
Twilight sniggered, trying and failing to hold back the laughter at the thought of poor Rainbow Dash. “I guess living with my parents for a week will be a breeze by comparison.” Twilight said with a sigh. “It’ll be nice to see them again, I haven’t visited them since I left Canterlot. We’ve sent letters, but it’s not the same. And we really didn’t get a chance to catch up at Shining Armour’s wedding, what with the changeling’s and all.”
“Yeah, ain’t nothin' like an invasion of evil shape shiftin' pony-bug things to kill a conversation.” Applejack agreed. “Ah did get a chance to exchange some small talk with your dad. Ah think. It was getting late, an’ we’d all been at that punch. We was more than a little tipsy by then.”
Twilight blushed. She remembered that she’d drunk a few large cups of that punch before she’d learned alcohol was in it. She’d ended the night trying to borrow Princess Celestia’s crown to try on. Celestia had been understanding enough, even finding it funny, but Twilight had been sending apology letters for days afterwards.
“Is it true your mom’s named Twilight too?” Applejack asked, as the random fact bounced into her conscious memory from out of whatever dark back corner it had been hiding away in.
Twilight nodded. She suddenly realized she hadn’t told her friends all that much about her family. She’d discussed all kinds of other topics at length, subjects she was studying, books she was reading, even her days at school being taught by Celestia herself. Yet almost nothing about her family. It was sad, but it just seemed to be one of those things that never came up. Now that she thought about it she didn’t know anything about any of the parents of her friends. She’d never seen Applejack’s mother or father, despite the closeness of her family life on the farm, they were never around. She wondered why that was, but decided to approach the subject at a later date. Applejack had been waiting a full ten seconds for her answer.
“Yes.” She said finally. “My mother’s name is Twilight Velvet. It’s a family tradition. The first filly born get’s named Twilight-something. I’m the fourth generation Twilight in my family.”
“Fourth?” Applejack said with some amusement. “I woulda thought it’d be more than that. Family tradition usually go back a long ways.”
Twilight smiled and nodded. “Great Granny Twilight started lots of family traditions. She said ‘Every tradition has to start somewhere, so I’m starting some of my own right now.’ Well, that’s the story I was told anyway. She was supposed to be odd like that.”
“Heh, well families is like that. Granny Smith got us doin' all kinds of odd things at one time or another. Some she forgets, but others, she’s kept up. Ah still ain’t hundred percent certain she needs to put on a bunny suit to hop over water durin zap apple season. Ah mean, the hoppin over water ah get, but the bunny costume?” She shook her head.
“Well as granny smith says ‘Magic is as Magic does.’” Twilight said. Applejack smiled at that. Twilight reminding her of her of her own family sayings was all kinds of amusing.
They were interrupted by a loud whistle in the distance.
“Train is early.” Applejack said.
Twilight nudged the sleeping Spike with her hoof. “Come on, Spike, wake up.”
Spike blinked slowly several times, confusion on his face as he tried to remember where he was. “Whaa?”
“My parents are here,” Twilight said. “Come on.”
Spike grinned and hopped off the bench.
Two train guards came out onto the platform and ushered everypony who wasn’t waiting for somepony away. There would be a rush of passengers getting off the train, and the platform was already packed with Canterlot refugees. By the time the train came to its screeching halt, there was just Twilight, Spike, Applejack and half-dozen cab drivers left.
The doors of the train carriages opened and a guard stepped onto the platform. “Ponyville. This stop is Ponyville.”
About twenty ponies, several families, climbed off the train. They looked tired, which was to be expected. They had very little luggage, taking only what they could carry.
Applejack approached a unicorn mare with a lavender pink coat and a royal purple mane. She was carrying a sleeping filly on her back. “Miss Amethyst?” Applejack asked. The unicorn nodded, a confusion playing on her face.
“Yes.” She said unsurely. She was trying to remember if she’d ever seen Applejack before. The mare knew her, she’d called her by name, but Amethyst was drawing a blank.
Applejack smiled. “Name’s Applejack, ma’am. Me an my family are playin' host to you and yours. Your husband sent me to escort you. He’s back at my family farm getting our guest room all ready for you and your young'un”
The mare’s expression relaxed, and she smiled. “Well, thank you very much.”
Twilight moved her way through the crowd of ponies, and smiled as two figures emerged from the crowd. Her parents. Her grin widened significantly.
Her father, Night Light, is a unicorn with a sky blue body and dark royal blue hair. His cutie mark is a yellow waxing crescent moon with a smaller, waning crescent moon inside.
Her mother, Twilight Velvet, is a white mare with purple and white striped mane and a cutie mark of three purple stars.
“MOM, DAD!” She cried. Racing up to them, she threw her hooves around the pair and pulled them into a tight hug. The two parents nuzzled the cheeks of their daughter, each wrapping one leg around Twilight.
“Twilight, dear.” Her mother smiled. “It’s so good to see you.” As she pulled out of the hug she looked her daughter over. “You’re looking well.”
“How are you two?” Twilight asked in return. Her parents looked a little tired but otherwise alright.
“We’re fine, kiddo.” Her dad said with a casual laugh.
“ ‘Kiddo’?” In her entire life her father had never called her ‘Kiddo.’ Twilight looked at her mother for answers. The mare just shook her head in an exasperated way.
“Don’t ask. He’s been doing that a lot lately.” She finally looked down and noticed Spike, her grin widened. “My, you’ve grown Spike.”
Spike grinned sheepishly. “Thank you, Auntie Velvet.” He said politely.
Velvet laughed lightly. Her horn started to glow, and the flap of the small saddlebag on her back opened. “Such a gentlecolt, as always. Here, I brought your favourite.” Out of the bag she lifted a small chunk of turquoise. Spike’s eyes widened with glee as the blue stone landed in his hands.
“Thank you, Auntie Velvet.” He stared at the stone for a few seconds before throwing the whole thing into his mouth and munching it down with a wide smile on his face.
Twilight shook her head, both approving and disapproving of her mother giving treats to her assistant. “You’ll spoil his dinner.” She said with a sigh. “Anyway, let’s hurry back to the library. I’ve got buns in the oven.”
Her mother gasped, then squealed. Twilight was so shocked she jumped. Spike started coughing on his gem. Night Light gave him a very solid hoof to the back, clearing the blockage.
Twilight was grabbed by her mother and made to look her in the eyes. The mare looked both angry and shocked. “We don’t see you for months, and THIS is how you break it to us that you’re pregnant?” She yelled at her daughter. As suddenly as it had arrived, the anger gave way to joy, a wide smile breaking out on Velvet’s face. “OH, I don’t care!” She pulled Sparkle into a tight hug. “Oh, a grand child. Who’s the lucky stallion? I’m so happy.” She pulled out of the hug and looked at her daughters midsection. “I thought you were just getting a little chubby.”
“MOM!” Twilight jumped back from her mother, blushing furiously as she became aware of the stares they were attracting from the station staff and the ponies of Canterlot who were still hanging around. “What the hay you talking about!?” She looked back over the last few minutes to try and think what had put such a dumb idea into her mothers head. The answer clicked a second later and Twilight Sparkle facehoofed. “Mom. I said ‘I have buns in the oven.’ Cinnamon buns. At home!”
Twilight Velvet grinned sheepishly, a blush rising on her own face. “Sorry. I guess I misheard.” She laughed nervously.
Twilight shook her head and glared at Spike, who was laughing so hard his face was turning a deep royal purple. She took the guffawing dragon in her magic and carried him in a levitation field. “Let’s just go before you mishear anything else.” She groaned. “You really think I’d tell you like that?” ‘Shining maybe, but not my parents.’ She added in her mind. Keeping her head low and trying to ignore the sniggers of the ponies around them, Twilight led her parents out of the station and into Ponyville.
“Let me take Spike, dear.” Twilight Velvet took Spike in her own magic and lay him down on her back. Spike relaxed as Auntie Velvet gave him a free ride without any fuss or complaint as to his laziness or his weight. “You’re looking so thin Spike. Are you getting enough to eat? You’re a growing dragon after all.”
Twilight sighed inwardly. Spike had a round belly but he was skinny, meanwhile she was as fit as she ever had been (she had done an awful lot of running over the last couple of years, mostly in fear of her life) but she was looking chubby? How could she have forgotten her mother had such a blind spot when it came to Spike. She would spoil him rotten if Twilight Sparkle didn’t keep an eye on things.
Her father came up beside her, looking left and right and taking in the features of the town. “Is there a good night spot around here?” He asked his daughter.
“What?” Twilight looked at him confused. “Well, I guess the park is nice at night. A great spot to stargaze.”
Night Light laughed lightly and shook his head. “No honey, not what I meant. I mean is there a good bar, or night club? A place I can get a drink, maybe do a little dancing, meet some of the locals.”
Twilight stared opened mouthed. Her dad drank? She’d never seen him take more than a single glass of hard cider on Hearths Warming Eve. She looked to her mother who just shook her head.
“It seems to be his latest hobby.” She said as though that explained everything. Her tone was one of a pony who was tired of trying to explain the situation and had just accepted the situation for what it was.
“Well, we do have the inn.” Twilight pointed down a street as they passed. A tall building was at the end of the road. The inn was packed with more guests than it had ever seen in its life before. “I don’t really go in there, and I wouldn’t call it a night club or anything, they usually close around eleven.”
“Well, maybe I’ll check it out all the same.” Her father said. He started to make a beeline for the inn, only to be cut off by his wife.
“We’ve only just arrived.” She said sternly. “Let’s unpack and get a good night’s sleep. If you want a drink so much you can visit tomorrow night.”
Night Light looked disappointed but relented. “Okay dear.” He tried to nuzzle Velvet’s cheek but she turned her head from him and walked on by her daughters side. Sparing the inn one last look, Night Light followed on close behind.
“He’s been so childish lately.” Velvet said in an annoyed tone. “Ever since Shiny’s wedding.”
“Has he taken to drink?” Sparkle asked, concerned.
“I can hear you two you know.” Night Light said from behind them.
“We know.” Velvet said in a light-hearted teasing tone. “We’re talking about you, not to you.” She looked to her daughter. “He’s drinking more than he used to, but I don’t think it’s a drinking problem, if that’s what you’re asking, dear. The real problem is the parties. He’s out almost every night at one night spot or another. He comes home not long after Celestia raises the sun and sleeps all day. Whenever I ask where he’s been he usually says ‘Out having fun.’” She shook her head. “He’s been trying to get his friends to go on a road trip to Los Pagasus for a 'vacation,' he claims.” She looked over her shoulder and spoke louder, so that Night Light couldn’t fail to her. “But I know he just wants to spend a week emptying our bank account of bits to play in the casinos.” She turned her head away from him and looked to the younger Twilight again. “Enough about your father making a fool out of himself. What about you? Have you met anypony lately?” She smiled knowingly. “Is there a special stallion in your life?”
“No, mum.” Twilight said, shaking her head. The library was in sight, and she was actually happy their journey was coming to an end. She had never felt comfortable discussing her personal life with anypony. “There’s nopony. I don’t really go out much, except with my friends. Most evenings I like to stay indoors and study.”
Twilight wasn’t against the concept of dating. She did someday hope to meet that special somepony and maybe even have a foal or two. There just never seemed to be time for it. She had such a busy time on her hooves, running the library, continuing her studies in both the arts of Magic and Friendship, not to mention the occasional adventure or two to save all of Equestria. There was just never enough time left over for the whole 'searching for a mate' thing. She’d never let it bother her, because she was still young. She had her whole life ahead of her to find somepony and have foals. Shining Armour was almost ten years older than she was, and he’d only just gotten married. Surely that gave Twilight a similar timeline before she had to start worrying?
“You really should try and make more of an effort, dear.” Her mother said kindly. “Time has a way of slipping through your hooves, and, before you know it, you’ll be my age and still looking for that special somepony.”
“I understand mum.” Twilight said in a neutral tone. She pushed the door of the library open. “Come on, let’s get you unpack-”
“SURPRISE!!!”
The lights came on, confetti and streamers fell in front of Twilight's eyes. She was blinded momentarily by the assault of the dozens of multicoloured balloons tied to everything string could be tied to in the library. A huge crowd of ponies were in the main room, and a bright pink mare with a cotton candy mane was in the middle of it all. Hanging from the ceiling was a huge banner that read "WELCOME TO PONYVILLE!"
Twilight had a momentary flashback to her first night in Ponyville. Pinkie had gathered everypony for a surprise welcome party in the library. She feared this one would go on all night, too.
Before Twilight could say anything, Pinkie pulled a strange contraption into the middle of the room. It looked like a cake stall on wheels; two shelves were full of cupcakes and pies, there was even a small portable oven, and the whole thing was covered in flags, trumpets, bells, whistles, and, Twilight noticed a new addition, a flugelhorn. Pinkie’s welcome wagon, which could only mean...
Pinkie jumped into the middle of the room, a space forming around her quickly as all ponies knew what was coming. Pinkie jumped up to her welcome wagon and kicked a big red button on the side of the device. Loud music started playing and Pinkie bounced around manically on the spot.
“Welcome welcome welcome
A fine welcome to you
Welcome welcome welcome
I say how do you do?
Welcome welcome welcome
I say hip hip hurray
Welcome welcome welcome
To Ponyville todaaaayyyyyyyy!”
Pinkie did one impressive flip that looked like it should be impossible without wings to hold her in the air for so long. She landed on her knees in front of Twilight Velvet and Night Light.
Twilight ducked down and, seemingly from nowhere, found an umbrella hat to place on her head. Her parents didn’t notice; they were still staring at Pinkie, who was grinning knowingly.
“Wait for it.”
The tiny oven of the wagon exploded, showering the group with a cloud of confetti. A second later, the confetti cannons fired, releasing a torrent of raw cake batter that splashed over them all, covering Pinkie, Spike, Twilight, and her parents.
Pinkie just laughed. “Whoops. Looks like I put the confetti in the oven and the cake in the confetti cannons. Again!” She laughed and licked the batter off her body with a tongue that, somehow, stretched and reached her from ears to tail.
Twilight rose up again between her parents. They were covered in the same batter but, thanks to her umbrella hat, Twilight Sparkle was clean. “I should have warned you.” She said. Even Twilight wasn’t sure if she meant warning her parents about the party, the cake cannons, or just warn them about Pinkie Pie. “I thought I had more time.” Her horn glowed brightly for a second. In a flash of light the raw cake mix vanished, leaving her mother, father, and dragon spotlessly clean again. Then Twilight turned her attention to her manic friend. “Pinkie, I thought I asked you to postpone the party until tomorrow.”
Pinkie nodded along, her smile never fading. “You did and I was going too but then I figured, what better way for a surprise party to be a surprise party than for even the pony who wanted the party to not know when it was going to happen?” She laughed. “I think I’ll call it a Super Surprise Party!”
“Well it certainly was a surprise.” Twilight Velvet said, she looked shaken, but amused. She stepped up and held out a hoof to Pinkie. “You must be Pinkie Pie. Twilight has told us all about you in the letters she sends home. I’m Twilight Velvet.”
Pinkie’s grin widened and she put her hoof against Velvet’s. The older mare jumped in the air with a shriek. Her hair stood on end as a bolt of electricity ran through her.
“PINKIE!” Twilight yelled in horror, rushing to her mothers side. They both stared at Pinkie who held up her hoof apologetically. Attached to the end of her leg was a small hoof buzzer.
“Oopsie,” She giggled. “I forgot about that.”
“Pinkie!” Twilight scolded. “You can’t just-” She was silenced as she realised her mother was laughing along with Pinkie Pie. “Mum?”
As Twilight Velvet’s laugh trailed off she sighed contentedly. “I can’t believe I fell for that. That trick’s older than Granny Twilight.”
“Don’t worry about it.” Spike said as he walked up to them with two bottles of sarsaparilla. “Pinkie’s an expert prankster. She always manages to trick me.” He held the bottle out to Velvet who took it in her magic.
Twilight looked back to the door, expecting to see her dad still standing there. To her surprise he was gone. Looking around the room she finally caught sight of him on the other side of the room by the table filled with different bottles of drinks. She hoped, but doubted, that was apple juice in his glass.
“Ooh Twilight.” Pinkie’s voice grabbed her attention again. “Would you like a cinnamon bun? I found them in your oven. They’re a little burnt, I think you had the temperature too high, but they’re still good.” Pinkie held up a plate of things that were more carbon than baked goods.
“No thank you Pinkie.” She said with a sigh. She looked around the room. “Where are the rest of the girls?”
“Well Applejack said she had to stay at the farm and help her new guests. Rainbow Dash said something about protecting her stuff from drool monsters, which is funny because I thought she had pegasus ponies staying with her not monsters. I wonder what drool monsters look like. I’ll have to ask Rainbow if I can see one of them. I wonder if they’re nice. Ooh I wonder if-”
“Pinkie!” Twilight clapped her hooves together to break Pinkie out of her rant and back on subject.
“Oh right.” Pinkie giggled. “Fluttershy said she couldn’t stay up late because she had some poor sick bunnies to take care of. Rarity said she was busy handing out blankets she made for the poor ponies of Canterlot who didn’t bring anything with them. So that just leaves me and I’m here with you.”
“Would you like a drink honey?” Night Light appeared, levitating two large cups in his blue magical aura.
“Thanks, Dad.” Twilight took the cup in her magic and took a long gulp. Her eyes widened and she spat out the drink, dropping the mug to the ground. She gagged and coughed as her throat and stomach felt like they’d just swallowed fire. “Wha-” She tried to talk but coughed more. Pinkie appeared with a glass of water, Twilight drank it down in two large gulps. She took deep breaths and stared at her father. “What the hay was in that?”
“I only made fruit punch.” Pinkie said in confusion. She looked down at the puddle on the floor that had spilled out of Twilight’s cup when she’d dropped it. She gave it a cautious sniff and wrinkled her nose. “That’s not fruit punch.” She said darkly.
Night Light laughed. His horn glowed and he pulled a large glass bottle from the saddlebag on his back.
Silver Horseshoe White Rum
product of
Horseshoe Bay
151 Proof
“Are you crazy?” Twilight stared at the bottle in horror. “You spiked my punch?” She felt the heat of the drink starting to spread through her. She wondered how much her dad had put in the cup. Enough to get her tipsy? Enough to get her drunk? Or worse: enough to get her grabbing-at-Celestia’s-crown-blitzed-out-of-her-brain!
“It’s a party.” Night Light said defensively. “A party isn’t a party without a few strong drinks.”
A blur of pink passed in front of both of them. Pinkie had grabbed the floating bottle out of the air. “Really?” She asked, looking the bottle over. “I’ve never served alcohol at any of my parties. Does that mean I’ve been doing it wrong all this time?” With a kick of her hoof the cork flew out of the bottle. Pinkie took a sniff, her nose wrinkling “Yuck!” She stuck out her tongue. “That doesn’t smell good...but I want my parties to be the best they can be so-” She titled the bottle up and took a long swig.
“PINKIE, NO!” Twilight threw herself on her friend, knocking the bottle across the room.
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This oughta be good...
Heh. Buns in the oven.
Drunk daddy and impulsive mommy? Ohh, lovely shenanigans WILL ensue...
Alt. Title: It's Been One Week Since I've Gotten To Read...
1765018>>1772317fc05.deviantart.net/fs70/f/2012/061/7/f/picture_unrelated_by_madnessabe-d4rhxp9.jpg
i.imgur.com/Q3B5b.jpg
Welp. There goes that.
I can Quite interested,
Silver Horseshoe White Rum
product of
Horseshoe Bay
151% Proof
Oh my! Twilies going to have her hooves full tonight haha!
1782705
Thank you
I hoped fans would notice and like that line.
Drunken Pinkie Pie.
Not sure if hilarious or terrifying...
Yup, mid life crisis all right. All Night Light needs now is a motercycle and it will be complete.
Putting on my Read Later list for when finals are over.
Funny, but few noticeable and easy grammar mistakes.
Also snickered sounds better.
Other than that good job.
If Pinkie gets drunk, Ponyville will never be the same.
oh god, the idea of a drunk pinkie terrifies me
1782872
I hear yah
1783316 Saturday can't come fast enough.... and yet slowly because then I'll feel like I have more study time for my last thing on Friday...
What a great premise for a story... Velvet is surprisingly unconcerned that her husband stays out all night doing Celestia knows what. I shudder to think what he'll find to do in Ponyville. As for finding Twi a stallion, as the CMC know from singing about it, the pickings around town are slim. Maybe the odds have improved with all of the Canterlot visitors though
Midlife Crisis Daddy and I want Grandkids Mommy.
Good luckmTwilight Sparkle. You're gonna need it.
My dad is going through the exact same thing right now. I hate it.
With a fiery, burning passion.
Oh, boy. This is going to be good. And Twilight's mane is going to be a mess at the end of all this, I bet. It may even spontaneously combust again... at least, I hope so. I like those moments.
I knew someone would put in the 'buns in my oven' bit I was waiting so long for that.
Ahh, nothing like a good mid life crisis to spice life up. My dad is through his right now.
Wait, wait, wait...
Every single stallion in Equestria... or every single stallion in Equestria?
... Wait...
I should just... read it.
I really like this idea, and so far the style. I especially like your 'family tradition' explanation for the name Twilight.
Oh boy, meddling moms? Haven't had that yet, but mid-life crisis dad I've had to live through.
Rainbow must protect her stuff from drool monsters!!!
Proof and percent are different things but similar. Percent is how much alcohol is in the drink as a percentage. The most you can get with 'natural' distillery methods is something like 98.9% or something. Everclear - nasty stuff. If you really chemically work it, you can get 99.999999% (effectively 100%) ethyl alcohol but that's considered a chemical and not a drink. Proof is percent times two. So 151 proof rum is really 75.5 % alcohol.
pinkie + alchol = apocalypse *packs suitcase* i'm going to whinnypeg.
I just thought of something,
someone should write a fic with Pinkie getting drunk and her friends try to sober her up
mylittlefacewhen.com/media/f/img/mlfw261_like_a_boss.jpg
Cinnamon rolls
I see what you did there, writer.
Twilight, you live in a tree, that's also a library, and you left the oven on while you leave the house to go pick your parents up from the train station. Fail.
% and proof are two different things % means the % of alcohol in the drink proof is twice the percent. You put both. Sorry to be a booze natzi but I don't like that clerical error!
1782555 and I've still got rug burns on both my knees!
Taking a long swig of 151% proof alcohol cannot be healthy...
Oh Celestia... If Pinkie puts alcohol in her parties...
Twilight wasn’t against the concept of dating. She did someday hope to meet that special somepony and maybe even have a foal or two. There just never seemed to be time for it.
Oh, Twilight Twilight TWILIGHT.....
Wasn't that exactly what you said about having FRIENDS?
1787898
Was going to point that out. To the author-the easy way to remember it is that percent is always half of the proof number. 200 proof would be 100% alcohol, but that's not really possible, lol. Rums iirc tend to be 40% (80 proof) to 50%(100 proof), and what's the author mentions as a 75% (150 proof) I think is an overproof rum. Source: am a waitress and deal with the liquors sometimes.
Drunk Pinkie Pie...
iambrony.steeph.tp-radio.de/mlp/gif/dramatic_rarity_by_mezkalito4p-d4d68u8.gif?1320514660
When mother Twilight had seen her daughter didn’t have the chef’s instinct for
improvisation and measuring by eye
Not trying to be mean here but i think you meant twilights mother, could be wrong though considering the whole twilight per generation thing.
Just a quick note, you might want to do a bit more proofreading with a focus on your capitalization. Not only are there a few uncapitalized instances of "spike" and "twilight" but family titles should be capitalized when they're part of proper names. A lot of those "auntie Twilight" and "granny Twilight" should be "Auntie Twilight" and "Granny Twilight."
Pinkie Pie+ Alcohol...
Excuse me while I run for my life... I'm sure the tiger and George Clooney will make sense in the morning
Buns in the oven. Hah!
Is this a A Slice of Life Reference?
lol that bun in the oven thing is the best, I actually fell out of my chair
Pinkie drinking alcohol?!!!!!
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WE ARE ALL GONNA DIE!!!!!!!!
1837371 But it's already past 12/21/12.
Twilight Velvet sure LOVES Spike. Great Chapter
Drunk Pinkie? This is not gonna end well
So that's the famous middle life crisis? Twilight's gonna get a lot of troubles
A drunk women who has the ability to defy the laws of the universe,is likely a nut, and possibly a depressed,psycho, or just plain average drunken person
Well we are all f#*$ked