Elements Change the Dark Hearts

by Nightmare_0mega

Cotton Candy Land

Elvis' eyes fluttered gently as he returned to the waking world once again. The area around him felt familiar, and by the time his sight adjusted itself, he was able to confirm that feeling. He was back at the Four Devas Headquarters. Same dark atmosphere. Same blue flames lighting the tan pillars. Same extravagant purple and gold table. Same bottomless pit beneath them.

"I'm back?" he uttered with caution. His hand stroked the table gently, testing whether it was real, or some really well crafted illusion. In doing so, his hand bumped into something very welcoming. His old cigar tray. In it, a small pile of ashes and-

"Es cierto?" His hand wearily reached forth, and quickly clutched a still lit cigar, his favorite brand no less. Lifting his head off the table and leaning back against his red cushioned high quality seat, he took a slow drag of his smoke. With a satisfying sigh, he let the fumes escape his lips as he spoke, "It really is." He took another long drag of his cigar, relaxing in the sublime sensation, when he heard someone call to him.

"El~vis..." sung a feminine voice.

Elvis coughed at his name being said in such a way. He turned to the right, and noticed possibly his most favorite succubus in the world. "Oh, Dios mío..." he couldn't help but utter with a smile. Shannon, the fair skinned, green tattooed, rose colored fetish outfit lined with gold wearing she-devil was approaching him. With a look he couldn't mistake.

She giggled lightly, stepping up upon the table, and gave a small twirl on the intricately designed furniture. Elvis panicked a bit. "'Ey 'ey 'ey! Shannon, you're not supposed to be on the table! Belze would have your head if he ever found out."

She pouted but soon stopped with a smile, and sat at the edge of the table's surface right next to him, kicking her feet lightly, "Belze isn't here," she cooed, "As long as neither of us tells, he won't know about it either." She hopped off the table, and expertly climbed onto the chair Elvis sat upon, her high heals tip toeing against the edge. She gracefully shimmied and danced about the chair's edge in a way only a creature such as her could do.

Elvis began to relax around the odd but welcome display. He felt even more relaxed as her arms began to wind around his large set body, his arms and all. Shannon's grip on him was nice and tight. Actually, maybe a bit too tight, he thought, and she hasn't yelled at me once since she showed up... Suddenly, things seemed a little off now. Everything was too perfect. WAY too good to be true. Shannon's grip began to get tighter.

"'Ey! Let go!" he began to try to wiggle free, but it was no use.

"Shh," she hushed against his ear, whispering, "Just relax. Everything will be alright." Her arm got so tight that it was now hardly possible to move his arms properly. Shannon spoke again, but this time, her voice changed from sultry to mousy, "This is for your own good, big guy."

Elvis kept fighting against her stranglehold on him, but a wash of fatigue enveloped him. Quickly loosing energy, he looked back into Shannon's face one last time, a face both perfect but incorrect, and slowly passed out. The whole room of the Four Devas Headquarters began to blur from his vision as darkness took over once again.

-o-v-o-v-o-v-o-v-o-

Elvis jerked awake, the light of the morning shining directly in his eyes. He shifted, trying to get away from the accursed light, but ended up falling sideways. With an indignant and embarrassing thud, he assumed a couple of things. The first was that he was bound to a chair. He didn't know of any mortal chair that could hold his weight, but that wasn't important. The second thing was that while the atmosphere felt very off, it also felt VERY real. With the blurriness of his eyes fading, he shifted himself back upright and began to finally take in his surroundings.

"I'm in a tree," he stated flatly. To be more accurate, he was inside of what seemed to be a hollowed out tree used as a home and library. He noticed neatly ordered books, various furniture, and even a kitchen off into the distance. The issue, however, is that everything seemed a bit too colorful. Too vibrant. He looked down on himself, and saw he was indeed bound to a chair. Oddly, it was only a piece of rope tying him down. Los necios, he thought to himself, a little rope can't hold me. He chuckled darkly as he began to flex his arms. The rope stretched, but only got tighter. He tried again, and the same result occurred. Again and again he tried until he wore himself out. It was useless.

"Qué está pasando aquí?!" He uttered in his natural tongue, repeating in English, "What th' HELL 's going on here?!"

"Oh, you're awake!" exclaimed the familliar mousy voice from last night and the end of his dream.

Elvis looked upon the top of the stares, and saw the purple unicorn thing he encountered- "Last night..." He grumbled, staring daggers at the little equine. "Chica, I suggest you let me loose, before I get real angry."

She slowly moved down stairs, addressing his hostile suggestion with, "I'm sorry, but I can't quite do tha-"

"WHY NOT?!" He spat, interrupting her.

"Let me finish, and I would have told you." She cleared her throat, and spoke again, "As I was saying, I can't let you out right now, because letting you simply run loose would put yourself, and everyone in Ponyville, in danger. We don't know who you are, or what you're capable of, but if you're anything like Bael..." She trailed off for a moment, "Anyway, I WILL free you. However, only after you've answered a few questions."

"Chica, you must be loco if you think I'll talk." Elvis said defiantly.

"My name is Twilight Sparkle." She said with a deadpan. "If you prefer," she continued in response to his defiance, "You can ask the questions first. I'm sure you are seeking a lot of answers."

Elvis mulled over the offer for a moment, "Ok, fine. Why are you a poco caballo?"

"A what?"

"A little horse, pendeja!"

Twilight scrunched her nose at the rude attitude. She had no idea what 'pendeja' meant, but it didn't sound pleasant. Regardless of his behavior, she answered, "We prefer to be called 'ponies', and we are the dominant species in Equestria."

"Equestria?" He questioned, "Where is that?"

She beamed, "I'm glad you asked!" With a flash of her horn, a stand with a chart of the world was produced, with Equestria at it's center. Elvis watched, mouth agape, at what she just did. Summoning an object out of thin air was something only the most magically powerful of his kind were capable of doing. "This land mass," she explained, pointing with a pointer stick in her hoof, "is Equestria. To the east is-"

Her words were drown out by Elvis' thoughts. He was stuck in a children's fantasy land, and they had power. Lots of it. Maybe even enough, "-to get me home..." He looked back up to the purple unicorn, whom was still trying to lecture him. "Uhm, Chica? Uno momento, but mind if I ask you another question?"

She stopped mid speech, replying with a slightly annoyed, "It's Twilight." She sighed, and forced a smile at him before asking, "What is it you'd like to know?"

"Twilight, I'm just a lost and lonely traveler in an unfamiliar land," he pleaded half honestly, "All I really want is to go home. Is there anything you or anyone else here can do to send me back?"

With a puff, her stand was gone, as she approached the large suit clad being. "I'd love to, I really do, but the problem is we can't. Not yet at least." Elvis was about to bark back indignities, but held his tongue, lest he lose his one chance. "You came through a magical anomaly that I've been researching for the past month. It has such a complex set of sequences and weaves, with a high energy output, that it is very much out of our reach right now in recreating it. You can't go back until I've figured it out."

Elvis growled at the statement. He was stranded here, according to the little mare, and there was nothing he could do about it. He sighed with a sarcastic "Bueno..."

"In the meantime," she started, "It might be best If we get you used to life around here. Before that, though, I want to ask you a few questions."

Before he could bark back a 'no', there was an ecstatic series of knocks on the door. Twilight approached it, and was suddenly knocked over by a pink blur. Why do I have a feeling this happens a lot here, Elvis thought.

"Pinkie!" Twilight grumbled, "What are you doing?"

"I came to see our new guest, silly!" She said exuberantly, as if it were the most obvious thing in the world.

"Right. Uhm, mind getting off me?"

"Oops! Sorry Twilight!" She promptly got off her friend. As soon as her attention was no longer on Twilight, she noticed Elvis. They locked eyes, and he wished he never had. With a sudden, lengthened gasp, she raced up to the large being, tackle hugged him, and knocked him back onto the wooden floor.

"'Ey! Get off me cabrona!" Elvis yelled, but his demand fell on deaf ears, as Pinkie just hugged her new 'friend' tighter. Finally letting go, she began bouncing in place.

"Oh my gosh, I can't WAIT to show you around Ponyville. I know I should give you a 'Welcome to Equestria, Extra-Equestrian Guy' party, but a tour first would be much more appropriate. We could go and visit everyone and get you introduced to the whole town! I'm SO-O excited for you to meet every one of my friends and-"

"Make the chica stop!" Elvis whined.

"Chica? What's a Chica? Is that another name for a chick? I'm not a bird, silly, but I did dress up as a Chicken one Nightmare Night. Had to spend a whole week with Fluttershy's chickens just to be able to learn about what a chicken does to make it believable. I think I nailed it though, if I do say so myself-"

"U-U-U-UGH!"

"Pinkie?" Twilight called out. Her friend turned in attention, as Twilight continued, "Maybe things are a bit overwhelming for him. It probably be a good idea to just leave him be for a moment."

"Aww. I wanted him to see the town. Maybe we could've been friends by the end!"

"Friends? HAH!" Elvis scoffed. "Unless you can find me a smoke, I don't see it happening. Like I'd befriend a scatterbrained puta like you."

"I don't know what a scatterbrained peta has to do with anything, but if they're as nice as they sound delicious, then we could get along just fine." Pinkie reassured with her trademark unfaltering smile. Twilight, however, didn't miss the insult directed at Pinkie, and decided to turn the tables.

"You know what? Pinkie is absolutely right." She started, as Twilight untied the rope binds that held Elvis down with her magic. "It might do you a little good to go around town for a little. We can do the interview later. Besides, I still need to get back to work with my research to send you home."

"Cabrona." Elvis uttered in warning as he slowly got back up.

"YAY!" Pinkie cheered as she gripped the big guys hand and began dragging him out the door.

"THIS ISN'T THE END, PENDEJA!" He said, just before he slammed his head against the top edge of the door frame. A small 'sorry' was heard outside. As Elvis rubbed his head tenderly, he was tugged outside once again.

Twilight sighed. "I have a feeling that this will all end in disaster. I hope Ponyville can handle it."

-o-v-o-v-o-v-o-v-o-

It took Elvis a couple seconds to realize what had transpired. He was free. He could do whatever he'd want. There was only one catch. Considering how things went last night, and considering he didn't want to be tied up again, he figured it would be a good idea to play it safe for now. After all, either they were all stronger than him, or he became considerably weaker after his resurrecting experience. Confronting or aggravating them beyond a turning point right now might not be in his best interest. He could always burn down the town later.

To say that he received a couple awkward stares would be an understatement. To say that there was light gossip about his arrival floating around would be a bigger one. He could see and hear their abject terror. One wrong move, and they would be heading for the hills. It was as he liked it around most mortals. What made the situation bizarre and a little uncomfortable was the pink pony leading him around. She bounced the entire duration of the little trip, stopping long enough to point something out. Normally a location or another pony like her. Anyone introduced to him gave a weak, quivering, forced smile, a small 'hi', and then a cloud of dust as they ran back to their homes. It was a quick and exceedingly repetitive song and dance that got on his nerves. Made even worse by the fact that she hadn't stopped talking since they left the house tree.

"So, what's you're name?" Pinkie asked. Elvis didn't say anything, believing that she'd continue talking at any moment. Silence lingered between them. Elvis looked towards the pink pony, and found she was staring directly at him, expecting an answer. By the time he said anything, they were approaching a park with the fountain in its epicenter. "We~ell?" She sing-songed in anticipation.

"Tch, like I want to tell you," he sneered finally.

"Aww, come on. Telling other ponies their names is the first step in becoming friends!"

"You are NOT my friend," he huffed.

"That's because we don't know each other yet! I've been babbling away this whole time, telling you about the town, but not once have I let you talk about yourself, or even told you about me. That was rather rude of me, don't you think? SO, to make it A~ALL better, I figured I'd start fresh and ask you, what's you're name?"

"You want to know my name?" He grumbled. Pinkie's head bobbed up and down with vigor. "Fine." He leaped upon the edge of the fountain, which cracked slightly due to his weight. "I'm Elvis!" He made a series of hand gestures, which vaguely looked like 'Buck Fu' formations to Pinkie. "Mighty Mouth of the FOUR DEVAS!" He announced with pride.

"Wow!" She said in awe. "So, you're part of some superhero group?"

"What? NO!" He jumped off the fountain and back onto solid ground.

"Oh oh oh! You're part of a traveling circus act?"

"Gah, NO!" He roared.

"Wait, third times a charm." She sat there thinking for a moment, before saying, "You're a former member of a dark organization bent on taking over the world with the help of a sassy dominatrix, and old guy in a business suit, and a punk that holds one half of the key to your guys' victory, but there's a lone hero continuously hampering your progress?"

"N-" he was about to shout at her for being wrong, but she was absolutely right. Frighteningly so. How did the little chica do that?

"So what happened? How'd you end up here?"

"I don' wanna discuss it with you, Rosa!"

"Ooh! Is that a nickname?" Pinkie beamed.

Elvis huffed, and began walking towards a dirt road.

"HEY! Where are you going?" she asked, pursuing him.

"Away from you!" He shouted back.

"But don't you want to hang out for a little while longer? I'm sure you could tell me all about you when we do!"

"I refuse to spend another minute with you annoying me, ESPECIALLY if I don't have my smokes!"

"I know where you can find some."

Elvis stopped dead in his tracks. He turned around, and marched back up to the pink mare, looming over her like a doom filled shadow. "You lie."

"Nope. Cross my heart, hope to fly, stick a cupcake in my eye." She punctuated with a series of complected hoof gestures. "Not many ponies smoke, but there is a cigar shop in town. If you want, I can show you. And maybe I can take you back to Sugarcube Corner for some cupcakes."

Elvis' belly rumbled at the idea, while Pinkie only giggled at the peculiar timing. "You better not be wasting my time." He growled in warning. Pinkie turned and began bouncing back towards town, Elvis slowly following her at the prospect of sweets and cigars.

-o-v-o-v-o-v-o-v-o-

"GAH HAH HAH HAH HAH HAH!" Elvis rumbled with joy, "And the morons thought they could just dump the human and disrespect him. You should have seen the looks on their faces when I showed up! HAH HAH HAH!". It was nearly two hours later after Pinkie's promise. Happily munching on a pastry small enough that fit between his thumb and pointer, Elvis seemed to be enjoying himself more as time went on. With a long silky drag of his new, quality cigars, he blew the smoke from his nose, and laughed a little more. "After I smacked those bozos so hard they flew into the stratosphere, I gave the poor cabron a small salute. You know, to pay respect for the dead. That's when the God Hand showed up. Guess he knew something was up, but it weren't my doing this time. Never the less, I don't back off a challenge, or a fight."

"You do a lot of fighting. Aren't you worried you might hurt someone?" Pinkie asked.

"Chica, that's what we do. It's our pleasure. Our duty. Our entire livelihood. I'd go loco with boredom after a while If i couldn't flex and test these babies," for emphasis, he pumped his biceps. "I'd likely go soft too... well," he rubbed his gargantuan belly, before continuing, "softer than normal. Shannon always said I aughta lay off the snacks."

"Was Shannon your best friend?

"No no no. Any normal pendejo, demon or otherwise, would be smart to stay clear of that loco capulina. Guess I'm a special case though." He said fondly as he took another cupcake and popped it into his mouth.

"Is she a special some-"

Elvis choked on his pastry, slamming his hand against the table. Pinkie yelped, and remained silent for a moment. Very little startled her, but after the stories he told and the things he said about himself, she reasoned it would be a good idea to be careful around him. Despite her drive to make him a friend, she knew that being totally relaxed around him might be a bad idea. Elvis stopped chocking, and cleared his throat again, before taking a calming drag of his cigar. "Don't finish that sentence."

Pinkie quietly nodded, and smiled once again. "I'm sure Twilight will find a way to send you back sometime. If not, we can try to make your life here as super duper as we can!"

Elvis slowed in chewing yet another cupcake, and averted his eyes for a moment. Was she really considering having him around? More importantly, was HE considering staying? It seemed way too quick to him. Barely a day, and already he was loosing himself to this brightly colored land. He went from refusing this pink annoyance to actively recounting his life to her. From utterly despising his situation to somewhat enjoying it. It made him a bit nervous. "I'd rather go home..." he muttered finally.

"I hope it isn't too soon though," she continued, excitedly, "'Cause I still have to throw you a Welcome to Equestria Party!" She jumped up on the table, which was emphasized with a sudden gust of confetti and the sound of noise makers.

How in the universe does that chica do that? Elvis shook his head. "Anyway," he said, standing up, being careful to lean forward a tad so his head didn't collide with the ceiling, "I best be going."

"Where?" Pinkie asked.

"Eh, it's best I stick around town until your friend sends me back. In the entretanto, I'll just find a tree to sleep under. I've slept in worse places after all."

"Nope nope nope! I can't let you do that. Just stay right there!" She said before bouncing up to the counter. "Mr and Mrs Cake?" Out from behind the counter, eyes peaking over the edge, the two ponies slowly emerged. One was a sky blue mare with a pink mane, and the other a yellow stallion with an orange mane. Both were Earth Ponies. Both were absolutely terrified.

"Y-yes deary?" Mrs. Cake answered.

"You know that cellar that we hardly use anymore?"

"The one we haven't used extensively since your mishap the first day you moved in?" questioned Mr. Cake.

"The one where we spent months cleaning out the pink 'super jelly' you tried to make for the shop?" added his spouse.

"The one we use only in emergencies, due to its overwhelmingly sweet smell?"

"That's the one!" Pinkie grinned ear to ear to the fond memories. "Could Elvis use it to sleep in? Until we can find him a good home?"

The Cakes looked beyond their eccentric young relative, directly at Elvis of the Four Devas. Elvis, for whom they just spent an hour or so listening him talk about his exceptionally vulgar life. The same Elvis that had just possibly given them nightmares for the next couple weeks, likely about gobbling up ponies whole, or burning their poor defenseless little town down. Worse, nightmares about him terrorizing their children, Pound and Pumpkin cake. They understandably weren't too keen on the idea.

"He won't cause any trouble. Pinkie Promise!"

Eyes locked onto the pink mare. The Cakes were well aware of the infamous Pinkie Promise. Despite the cosmic horror that was sitting at their table, huffing that disgusting cigar, they knew they could trust a Pinkie Promise. They sighed in unison, before nodding in agreeing defeat.

"YIPPIE! Elvis, I've got you a room to stay in!"

As the pink mare bounced away, Mr. Cake turned to his significant other, and said, "Hun, what have we just gotten ourselves into?"

Author's Note:

Elvis

Comments

[Joey JoJo]

"Wait, third times a charm." She sat there thinking for a moment, before saying, "You're a former member of a dark organization bent on taking over the world with the help of a sassy dominatrix, and old guy in a business suite, and a punk that holds one half of the key to your guys' victory, but there's a lone hero continuously hampering your progress?"

Pinkie really needs to lay off the God Hand don't she?

[nightmaster0]

Great chapter.