A short journal styled short story of a castaway learning the true story of the Houyhnhnms.
My first love of reading was when I discovered old sea novels. This is a bit of a tribute piece to Gulliver's Travels.
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Rocinante
Joined 7th Oct, 2012 ·
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Now THIS is a clever story! I liked it a lot! Thank you!
I was wondering how long it would be before someone did a crossover style of thing of Gulliver's Travels and ponies.
(I was also starting to think Id have to write it myself, but I had no idea how I'd have managed that, as I can't write worth beans.)
Very cool.
(Loved the ending.) No matter how many times I read the word "Houyhnhnm," I don't think I'll ever be able to pronounce it. 
I really liked everything to do with the language-learning.
Of course the land of the Houyhnhnms was Equestria! In retrospect, how could have it been anywhere else?
I suspect that Celestia was quite pleased to learn that her old friend Lemuel found his way home and was even able to chronicle his adventures.
Just for connecting FiM to a literary classic, you deserve entry onto my favourites list.
1798402 Headcannon for this story: Houyhnhnm: pronounced/ who-when-knee-nay-hum; (who-when, pony) (knee, conjugation to imply smallness) (hum, possessive suffix)
That's quite a turn towards the dark at the end there...
Sorry to say, your character has pretty crap editors (is "bock" supposed to be "Bach"?). The way you approach this, especially then end, they're necessary; but they're also the least explained part of the entire story and it'd feel better if they could be removed.
Overall well-done, though!
1799395 Thanks. Fixed the Bach typo, I knew better than that. Really, you think the end is dark? I suppose his superstition in regards to the story of Persephone were well founded after all. But, maybe he's happier.
1799429
It's darkness is a bit of a perspective thing. The increased easy of speaking Equestrian, the crick or whatever in his back, the quadrapedal instance, and the garbledygook posted at the end all appear to indicate that he's been turned into a pony. Meanwhile, there's no indication that he knows he is/consented to being turned into a pony; and his reactions to the vocal cords thing and the quadrapedal instance suggest that he wasn't expecting it. Whether I'd jump on something like that and whether I'd be okay with it being done without my knowledge are two entirely different things. I'm sure Equestria is the best place to have to integrate in such a maner, but I'd infinetly prefer to be told "this must happen if you're to stay here" than have it done to me without warning.
It's slightly unfortunate that the Bach error was only the biggest and most egarious. If you still care come Monday, this would benefit from an editing pass then. If you can, get your computer or a friend to read it to you for that; it'll make many errors more evident. Make sure you look at it too though, and don't do it before Monday -- you need the time to ignore it and let it get out of your brain between now and then.
Will read later because of earliest recorded Brony.
was not disappointed. favorite and upvote.
This was way better than I expected! I'm surprised that it hasn't been featured; it really deserves it.
I'm not sure did he die or turnd to a pony? But I guess he turn pony. Anyway awesome story and deserve much more viewer and all.
I never thought of this crossover, but I did't know he was on a island with horses. I only knew about the small people. So now I most read the real book. Fav and thumbs up.
2102292 I know how the story ends in my mind. But, I left it open for the reader to project their own ending.
'Gulliver's travels' has 4 adventures in all. little people, Giants, Houyhnhnm, and floating island of overly smart people. You should really read it. It is a very easy read and loads of fun. There was a 2pt miniseries made in 1996 staring Ted Danson that you can find online for free, that dose the story justice.
Hi I'm the administrator and prereader of fics under 100 likes that are given to Mr.Stargazer. I review stories that don't meet requirements and I also will leave behind comments that will not only help you improve, but also allow you to potentially make changes in the future. (Oh and I won't go all out on you...if you were wondering)
The group I represent is "The Good HiE List" and today I'm giving my review. (nothing wall-o-texty)
Just got to this point and so far nothing really to kick and scream about. Although I can tell already the first pony he'll meet is Twilight.
Edit: +10 points for me! I was right!
That's a very bold statement considering he only has a grasp of their language. And I doubt they've already taught him what magic is.
I'm positive that's not how you die on a keyboard.
asf\jkllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllll[continues]
yea...ANYWAY just if you're wondering...I won't pass this.
There is no grammar errors to really complain about. And the logs kinda look atrocious if they were in story narrative (I don't even know what that means) then I'd say you're bad at this...but this isn't that bad.
I can say for sure that it was pretty slow at first, in fact it also felt rushed. I've not really seen stuff like this since Apollo 18 fic and he did it even better than this. His actually had better story telling with his logs. Yours however are a little rushed. Although it is understandable that he would write like this. He isn't obligated to post logs of every little change in atmospheric pressure, nor is he obligated to make contact or research stuff and document it.
But the bottom line is, there was just way too much happening...I could write a detailed chapter for each of the logs alone. Each might be more interesting then the last...(actually I guarantee it). But as nice as the story is, and as tragic as the ending (isn't) is. I don't think I can add this.
If this weren't a one shot I'd continue reading, you've actually killed off the main character the moment I was beginning to get into it.
But all and all it's a good fic.
Just not...well the plots ok...GAH IT'S HARD TO CRITIQUE SOMETHING WITHOUT REAL DIALOG AND DESCRIPTIVE PARAGRAPHS!
Anyway I don't believe there is enough here for me to say "Yes it deserves to be in group." but looking at the logs I also say "Possibly the worst format ever" and I don't really feel it's worth it.
Edit: Ok I've realized that this fic doesn't have enough to make me want to pass it. The plot is ok but the moment I begin enjoying it you remove the character. I can't think of "What could have been." when I blatantly see "What has happened."
Anyway. Sorry if this bums you. But I honestly think your story won't make it. But good news! I took the first two paragraphs as the way you write and you're a phenomenal writer.
I'm sure you can make a story I will pass some time in the near future.
2412591 Looks left. Looks right. "Ugh... Hi. Did this get put into some folder somewhere to be review?"
Maybe he died, maybe he got turned into a pony, maybe Lyra was messing with his stuff.
Thanks all the same for looking the story over. I wrote this only because it got stuck in me head. I would not call it a proper narrative. Though I always hoped someone would take it as an outline and write a proper narrative with it. I just don't have the inclination myself, too many other ideas in my head.
Now a story I put a lot of love into and I generally get good responses form is Clastic Glow. If you only read one of my stories read that one, not this little doodle.
Again, thanks for your comment.
2413392
Yea stuff like happens all the time.
Me being the 'assigned' fic reviewer with all the fics lower than 100 likes I get stories like this that some people think need to be appreciated.
It's honestly a good attempt and this almost made it.
Even if you didn't submit it. More information is on my profile if you want to check out the group.
Awesome! Reminds me of Arrow 18 in a lot of ways. The only downside is that it needs some editing for spelling and grammar in a few places.
Still, fav and follow
3267113 Thanks. I should really clean this story up. It was written because I couldn't stop thinking about the idea. I did two or three entries a night, then published it whit no real editing.
I have a ch2 brewing in my head now, where I'll write a journal from Twilight's perspective.
3268873
I look forward to it. If you an editor/proofreader, I'm fairly experienced.
3268873 omg yes do it do it now
3896406
That's still on the table. I have a little done on it, To be honest I've just recently figured out where I want this to go, when I pick it back up.
Till then, check out my other HiE that I'm currently working on.
3896442 there is a severe lack of gullivers travels inspired stories on this site
Really enjoyed this. I found the middle bits of Gulliver's Travels to be a little dry, but I pushed through to the end, and glad I did.
As for the ending... I suspect, considering Twilight's concern, that Luna did this without anyone else's agreement, possibly in response to her sister missing her old friend and how much he wished he could've stayed. If I remember right, he left because he didn't want to be treated as an animal, and couldn't really integrate properly with their society. Been a very long time since I read it though. In any case, Luna's little potion would've solved that... though with the extinction of the Yahoos, it may not have been a problem at all and she'll have some 'splainin to do. Well, more than she would anyways.
Great fic, well done!
4561829
You actually guessed the exact narrative I had imagined going on behind the scenes.
One of my favorite stories on this site. I have only and exactly two complaints about it. One, lotsa typos that need to be fixed. The fact that this is written in the style of a journal makes the problem seem less severe somehow, as if the errors belonged to the narrator, and not the author somehow, but they're still very distracting. Second, it's way too short! I normally can't stand the 'human in Equestria' formula, but I was thoroughly absorbed with this story, and longed to see more. It really felt like rediscovering this world of ponies all over again, and from a new perspective.
Well, well done. If this is what comes on a whim, you've not far to go to start finding a place among the larger literary world. The story itself is nothing spectacular, but that's what made it so charming and satisfying, especially with that ending. Kudos