Archivist's Notation:Two things: 1. You may as well Like it if you Fav it, since ya know Favs count towards the feature box... 2. What you're about to read was inspired/stolen from comments by Huganis and Nihatclodra. Many thanks to BronyBozly for his awesome editing.
---Apples and Wheat---
“Be yourself; everyone else is already taken.”
― Oscar Wilde
---Apple Eyes---
------
"Oh whistle round the world
I'm a little wolf inside a pony, you say
And off I’ll go from June to May."
A certain brown maned mare sang, swishing her magnificent tail as she watched a large handsome red stallion of the Apple Clan till another acre for wheat. "Well the Apple clan does seem to be quite serious about the wheat, and they are giving me such a pleasant sight to watch," she said mischievously.
Big Mac paused his tilling and glanced around the field. He could swear he felt eyes on him again.
Probly just my imagination 'specially after the other night, Big Mac thought, dismissing his suspicion and wiping the sweat off his brow.
------
Applejack liked to consider herself a practical pony. She knew Big Mac had more down to earth wisdom and one liners, but still Applejack thought of herself as a reliable, mature, and hard working pony. Granted, Applejack knew she was headstrong at times about doing things on her own, but what was a mare without her pride? Yet, when needed, Applejack would seek advice, if a bit reluctantly, from her friends. Hence her visit to Twilight's library.
"A wolf that lives in wheat?" Twilight Sparkle asked looking up from a thick book filled with esoteric symbols.
"That's what Granny said," Applejack replied with a shrug. "Ah figured if anypony would know more about somethin' like this, it'd be you Twi'."
"Hmm, it definitely sounds like it's from old agricultural folklore or maybe some kind of superstition," Twilight thought out loud, tapping her chin. "Although I've never heard of an agricultural myth with a wolf in it."
"Me neither. Usually wheat gets tied with Princess Celestia on account the golden color of it," Applejack offered as she sat on a cushion.
"That definitely fits in with most earth pony folklore," Twilight said as she started floating various books to her study desk.
"Think it might be some kind of unique Ponyville lore?" Applejack pondered, glancing over at her studious friend.
"With how close we are to the Everfree it wouldn't surprise me," Twilight responded as she exchanged glances between a few book titles.
Applejack let out a small sigh as she looked at the shelves full of books. Hoping there was answer somewhere in the mountains of text.
"Ah really hope this ain't a literal thing, Twi," AJ said with a hint of worry as she fiddle with her hat between her hooves. "A wolf ain't exactly something I want hanging 'round the farm."
"That's understandable, but there hasn't been a confirmed wolf attack on ponies in well over a thousand years."
"Unless ya count timberwolves," Applejack interjected.
"Well yeah, but timberwolves aren't true wolves. They're more plant than animal." Twilight explained as she shuffled a few books around in her search. "Plus, Equestria does have a treaty with the Wolf Tribal Council. And with the closest wolf settlement being on the other side of the Everfree, which is at least three days of travel by pegasus flight, that makes wolves are a very rare sight here in central Equestria."
"That maybe true Twi', but it's still got me a worrying if..."
"Aha! Found it!" Twilight exclaimed triumphantly, levitating an eight inch thick tome off a high shelf. Its dark blue book cover resembled the depths of the night sky with its gleaming silver crescent moon on the cover.
AJ whistled. "That's a mighty thick tome ya got there, Twi'," Twilight smiled and levitated the book onto the desk, then montioned for Applejack to sit beside her.
"This is The Book of the Moon. It's a collection of traditions, lore, and history of the Wolf Tribes that were collected by the wolf emissary Fianna. Princess Luna gave it to me a few weeks ago to study," Twilight explained, as she started to switch into lecture mode while her magic flipped through the pages. "It also covers all the major deities and spirits of Wolf Tribe. It's one of the very few books about their lore since the wolves still largely go by oral traditions, they call Song Lines. Did you know that they..."
"Whoa easy there sugar cube," AJ interrupted Twilight's lecture. "Ah'm sure it's plenty fascinatin', but Ah was hoping for somethin' more specific."
"Oh right. Sorry just got a little carried away" Twilight said, grinning sheepishly as she flipped through the book, stopping toward the middle. "Okay here we are, Spirits of Legend," Twilight said as she ran her hoof tip over the chapter title.
"Anythin' that might explain what Granny was goin' on about?" Applejack asked, trying to keep up with Twilight's speed reading.
"Hmm there are only two entries about a 'Wolf of the Wheat'." Twilight cleared her throat then began reading aloud to Applejack. "And I quote, 'Among the old Wolf Spirits there is one who is known to freely converse with Ponies and Griffins. In the past she has made agreements to help wheat grow in exchange for a harvest feast in her honor, for her wisdom concerning the soil is greater than any other's wisdom. She will often sleep near where she has made these agreements and will awaken when the agreements are to be renewed or made null. If She makes an agreement to aide a village's wheat crops She will stay near that village until the agreement is forgotten.' She was last seen going into the woods known as the Everfree, stating that She wished to learn more about the Pony Tribes that dwelled beyond it." Twilight finished, then looked to Applejack.
"Sounds like this is same wolf Granny was talkin' about." AJ said with a nod.
"Good, that means we're on the right track," Twilight smiled then looked back to the book.
"And the other part ya mentioned?"
"Well it switches to a short account written by a pony who signed only as 'a traveling Peddler' and he wrote, 'At certain times, in a village that the Wise Wolf has made an agreement with, she will appear in the form of a pretty young mare, and she is always seen as a late-adolescent. A lovely figure, she has a long flowing mane as well as wolf ears and a beautiful brown tail with a splash of white at the ends of both ear and tail.' And that's all that's written about this Wolf Spirit," Twilight said as she flipped over a couple pages double checking the accounts.
"Well that's mighty vague," Applejack said as she scratched her head, "It doesn’t even say what this wolf's name is."
"Oh, it has her name written in it at the top. See right there," Twilight said, pointing to a small heading that read "ホロ".
"Uh Twi' that's just a funny looking "T" and a square somepony scribbled in," Applejack deadpanned.
"What?" Twilight said with confusion plastered across her face, before realization dawned on the young scholar. "Oh sorry. I forgot it's written in pictograph."
"If by picture graph ya' mean chicken scratch, Ah agree."
"No, no it's a type of language derived from pictures in place of letters," Twilight explained as she floated a translation reference book over. "Wolves originally used pictures they clawed into the wood of the giant redwood trees where they live in order record important names and dates," she explained as she leafed through the translator book.
"Makes sense Ah suppose," Applejack shrugged.
"Okay let's see, if I'm reading this correctly," Twilight mumbled, exchanging glances between the books.
"That's an "H" and that's translated as "O"s."
"So what's it say?"Applejack inquired, leaning over her bookish friend's shoulder trying to read.
"According to this pictograph the wolf's name is 'Holo'," Twilight said as she glanced between the two books double checking her translation.
"Holo," Applejack repeated as though she was trying to get a taste for the word.
"Hmm it sounds familiar," Twilight said squinting in concentration trying to remember only to sigh in defeat then look over to Applejack, "I think there might be more about her in some of my other books, but I'll have to do some serious digging."
"S'alright Twi'. It maybe vague, but it was a bit informative," AJ said as she got up, "Thanks fer the help sugar cube."
"No problem Applejack." Twilight said as AJ left the library.
"Holo, the Wise Wolf. That sounds so familiar", Twilight hmm'd as she levitated over her, rather thick, personal scholastic diary flipping to some notes on a brief discourse from Princess Celestia on non-equestrian spirits.
--- Sweet Apple Acres ---
Big Macintosh is a stoic stallion of common sense and full of good old down to earth wisdom, not prone to flights of fancy, so for him the feeling of nervous paranoia was definitely a rare and unwanted experience.
"Ah'm tellin' ya Ah got a feelin' that there's somepony poking around the edge of the property and spying on us," Big Mac drawled, glancing out the kitchen window.
"Yer actin' more nervous than a hen whose caught wind o' a fox," Granny Smith chided her grandson as she rolled dough for some apple pies.
"Ya Big Mac ain't nopony dumb enough ta try and steal apples from the farm," Apple Bloom agreed with Granny Smith, pouring diced apple filling into waiting pie crusts.
Big Mac sighed, knowing that there was no point in wasting his breath trying to convince Granny Smith or Apple Bloom of his suspicions. Instead, he opted to just get some cider from the ice box and sit on the porch.
Big Mac slowly trotted out on the porch and sat down to rest his hooves. He sighed, looking over the tilled soil and planted wheat. His paranoia fading as he felt a bit of pride at the work that he and Applejack had accomplished over the past couple of days. Big Mac looked over the planted field with a satisfied smile.
"Ain't nothing like seein' something ya done with your own hooves comin' along nicely," the red stallion said, holding up his cider mug, offering a silent toast to his Ma and Pa before he took a long drink of the cool sweet refreshing cider.
"Oh I most certainly agree with thee," a sweet mischievous voice said from beside Big Mac.
"PFFFFFFT!!!", Big Mac replied in startled, terror spitting his cider in a panicked geyser.
Big Mac hacked and coughed trying to catch his breathe and clear his throat of cider as that same voice laughed hysterically at his reaction.
After a few moments, Big Mac finally caught his breath as he leaned against the one of the porch's beams. He looked down at the still laughing mare. He saw she was short young looking earth pony mare her coat was a light --almost cider tinted-- tan with a brown mane and tail, but what really caught his attention was her ears. They didn't look like pony ears, they were too pointed, too high up on her head, and had white on their tufted tips same as her long tail. His eyes lingered on her Cutie Mark of a single ripe golden wheat stalk.
"Do you enjoy what you see?" the youngish looking mare inquired with a devilish smirk as she flicked her tail suggestively while she laid on her side in the grass.
"Well, I, um," Big Mac stuttered, realizing he was caught staring and blushed --quite a feat for the red stallion-- as he looked anywhere, but at the pretty mare laying on her side with most of her belly exposed.
"Macintosh!" Apple Bloom shouted as she barged out the screen door causing Big Mac to startle and turn around frantically."Granny says she needs ya ta...", Apple Bloom trailed off mid-sentence, eying her big brother with a confused look. "Big Mac, are yew blushin’?"
Big Mac shook his head then quickly turned back around to show the Apple Bloom the trespassing mare. Only to end up pointy his hoof at empty grass.
"Where'd she go?" Big Mac asked no one in particular as he glanced around the porch.
"Where'd who go?" Apple Bloom asked while she watched her big brother looked around the porch.
"A mare... She snuck up on me and startled me while I was drinking some cider," Big Mac explained while looking under the porch.
"Well, what'd she look like?" Apple Bloom asked, as she trotted up to Big Mac.
"Tan coat. Brownish mane and tail with a wheat stalk Cutie Mark," Big Mac answered, peering over at the tree stump by the porch, noticing the small pouch of wheat grains that Granny Smith had set out by the wolf statuette was gone.
"A wheat stalk!? Are ya' sure?" Apple Bloom asked excitedly, looking up at Big Mac with a beaming smile plastered on her face. "Did she have funny looking ears? Was her tail all bushy? Were her eyes apple red? Was she pretty?"
"I, um, ...maybe?" Big Mac replied uncertainly as he tried to keep up with Apple Bloom's rapid fire questions.
"She was here! She was here!" Apple Bloom cheered, hopping around the porch then dashed back inside the farm house shouting. "Granny Smith! Granny Smith! Big Mac saw her!"
"Eh? Who saw who?" Granny Smith asked, as she looked up from the apple cabbage stew she was cooking.
"Big Mac saw her! Out on the porch!" Apple Bloom excitedly explained, trotting up to her grandmother with an ear to ear smile on her face.
"Who'd ya see now?" the Apple Matriarch asked Big Mac as he trotted into the kitchen.
"Big Mac saw her on the porch!" Apple Bloom said excitedly as she pointed at her brother, "Big Mac saw Holo!"
"Let me guess she prodded ya than ran off?" Granny Smith asked Big Macintosh with a sly smirk.
"Um maybe?" Big Mac answered hesitantly.
--- Apple Road ---
Apple Road was at first a simple trodden path that lead from Sweet Apple Acres to Ponyville. With time and daily use by previous generations of the Apple Family it became a well worn dirt road that lead from Sweet Apple Acres to Ponyville proper.
So Granny ain't just pullin' our legs on this one, Applejack thought to herself as she trotted back to the farm at a leisurely pace pondering what she had learned from Twilight.
As Applejack was trying to figure out just what kind of a feast a "Wise Wolf" could even want, she heard something very faint that made her paused and gave her cause to look around the old Apple Road.
"...apple eyes...."
"Singing?" Applejack thought out loud, her ears perked and twitched as she turned her head left and right, trying to find the source of the faint singing.
"...sunshine pie...."
Applejack looked around the edge of the road and found a small opening in the bushes by the road. It wasn't the first time she had heard singing coming from the woods before and it was usually just Fluttershy singing to herself as she tended to some of her critters, but this was definitely not Fluttershy's melodic voice. This voice, while obviously female, had a sweet, almost youthful quality with just a hint of haughtiness.
"Ain't none my business," Applejack muttered to herself, but as she turned to walk away, something inside her stirred as she heard the singing. Like a long forgotten memory washing back into her mind.
This is a bad idea, Applejack thought as she sighed in resignation then trotted into the bushes, to follow the trail and faint singing and even fainter trail.
--- A few minutes later ---
Cautiously and curiously Applejack made her way down the small winding trail. The voice was becoming a bit clearer, enough that now Applejack could make out a certain mischievous tone or quality to it as well, like the singer knows things that no pony else knows.
Applejack followed the trail until the bushes finally opened up to reveal a small glen. The opening amongst the tree tops was just large enough to allow sunlight to bath the small glen in a soft, warm glow.
Strange how Ah've never noticed this place before, Applejack thought to herself as she looked around the small glen.
Growing in the center of the glen was a young wild apple tree and sitting with her back against the apple tree was a young tan coated mare singing to herself between bites of an apple.
"O seven apples on a zebra’s tree
With seven seeds to plant inside of me
In springtime I grew a magic song
Then trotting along, oh I sang the song to everyone,"
The brown maned mare sang as she tossed an apple core over her shoulder.
"I looked at the world through apple eyes
And cut myself a slice of sunshine pie
I danced with the peanut butterflies
Till time went and told me to say hello but wave goodbye.
A thousand sugar stars
Oh put them in a jar
And then whistle round the world
Oh whistle round the world
I'm a little wolf inside a pony, you say
And off I’ll go from June to May."
Well she's got a pretty voice whoever she is, Applejack thought, listening to the soothing singing for a few moments, before walking slowly towards the singing earth pony. Applejack eyed the tan mare carefully as she approached the tree, noting her strange pointy ears with their white tufted tips. As Applejack got closer she tried to spot the strange mare's cutie mark, but couldn't spot it on her flank while she was leaning with her back against the tree.
"Enjoying the view my dear Apple mare?" the tan mare asked with a smirk, startling Applejack.
"What!?" Applejack blurted out almost falling back with fright.
"Well you were staring at me quite intensely," the brown maned mare turned her head to face Applejack as she smirked deviously. "Specifically at my ears and flank."
"Ah wasn't starin' like that!" Applejack growled out between clenched teeth glaring down at the strange mare.
"Please be kinder to me", the younger mare whimpered as her eyes watered holding her hooves in a pleading fashion.
Applejack gasped softly and stepped back at a loss of words, her stern expression replaced with a faint blush of embarrassment.
"I believe you to be adorable", the tan mare smirked slyly.
"What?" Applejack asked confusedly taking another step back.
"I do believe the word you're thinking of is 'Hello', my dear Apple mare," the tan mare said causally, standing from the tree and stretched, revealing her cutie mark of a single ripe golden stalk of wheat.
"Ah ain't no pony's mare", Applejack retorted feeling less suspicious and more annoyed.
"Well of course not", the smaller mare chuckled, "Equestria has always had the strongest willed females."
"Who are ya?"Applejack asked eying the other mare with suspicion and annoyance as she walked around the wild apple tree. "And where'd ya get that apple?"
"Hmm to your second question first, the apple is from this lovely tree I was resting by," the tan mare said as she rubbed a hoof affectionately against the tree's trunk. "And if you are wondering, no, it is not from your farm."
"And how do ya know about the farm?" Applejack asked, keeping her emerald eyes fixed on this strange mare.
"Because I have been here long before your family was known as Apple, when it was still known as Smith" the brown maned mare explained matter-of-factly as her white tipped ears twitched and her tail swayed lazily.
"That can't be true! You'd have ta be over a 105 years old for that ta be true", Applejack declared in utter disbelief, "Mah family practically founded Ponyville!"
"Ugh, they truly we went with that name?" the tan mare said with disdain, "I much preferred Appleton."
"What are y'all babblin' about?" Applejack asked confused, "Ain't no way you can know all that and be as young as ya look."
"Presuming I am only a mare as you see me," the mare smirked, slowly circling Applejack.
"Who are you?"Applejack asked in a firm tone as she slowly followed the strange mare, for the first time noticing the small pouch on a thong around her neck.
"I am Holo The Wise Wolf," the cider tan mare explained as she sat down, tossing her long brown hair with a hoof as she flicked her bushy white tipped tail. "I have slept for many years, awaiting the time for the renewal of the old promises of wheat."
"Y'all don't look like no wolf to me," Applejack snorted as she sat down as well.
"I am Holo The Wise Wolf" ,the mare smirked as she explained. "As such I am wise enough to know when to wear my proper form and when to not."
"Or you're wise enough to know how to tell a proper lie," Applejack said, glaring a bit at 'Holo' suspiciously.
"Oh ho, you have a sharp wit." Holo grinned widely in amusement, showing her teeth and revealing that her teeth were not a pony's teeth.
Applejack's eyes widened as she saw that Holo had a pair of fangs; one set on top another on the bottom. However, what really caught AJ's attention were the other mare’s eyes. They were a shade of apple red and they danced with not only mischief, but honesty; pure honesty.
"Y'all really are Holo, ain'tcha?"Applejack asked with a hint of awe.
"Oh you believe me now?" Holo smirked, swaying her bushy tail. "How can you be so sure?"
"Your eyes," Applejack said, looking into Holo's apple red eyes. "Ain't no lie in them."
"Ah you must be nearly as good a judge of character as I." Holo grinned, looking into Applejack's emerald eyes.
"Well Ah'd like to think Ah'm a good judge o' character", Applejack replied as she relaxed a bit, mentally checking off the features Granny Smith had told her the 'Wheat Wolf' had.
"I can certainly attest to it," Holo giggled as she eyed the apple farmer. "Now that introductions are over, I admit I am a bit hungry. Wild apples are not nearly as filling as ones that are tended to by skillful earth ponies such as your family. Will you show me the way to the farm house?"
"Well y'all are a guest of the Apples," AJ said as she stood up. "So come on to the house Ah'm sure we can get somethin' cooked up fer ya. Plus we got a good warm bed for ya t’ sleep in as well. Y'all ain't gonna stay in the woods if 'n Ah got a say in it."
"Oh ho such a bold mare to invite one such as myself to a warm bed," Holo smirked deviously as she rose up on her hooves. "At least offer me some hard cider first."
"That ain't what Ah meant and you know it!," Applejack declared, blushing a bit as Holo trotted down the trail, filling the silence of the forest with laughter.
hmm.. I may have to watch this anime. Is it very long?
Haha Holo x AJ
OMG i love spice and wolf, you re so awesome. YES YES YES YES YES
Okay before ANYONE complains. I chose Holo instead of Horo because there is no L in Japanese. Secondly, if it bothers you that much you're just nit picking with the comb of personal opinion. And thirdly there's about three references in this chapter. See if you can spot them all.
1777034
Two seasons around 24 episodes I think.
1777044
Hmm to ship or not ship. That is the question.
1777050
I'm not that good of a writer, but thanks anyways.
1777080
Do it
1777080 your awesome, i haven't said anything about your writing yet
FIRST POST BITSCHES
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bMgI2kknAPyzVN/bR3GgNa2ehXEeprIWa+LRBWyxLEEPu8wJHw+vOK1cnJbPPSqDwr4/eoEmqR2U11p91admrmCzt2zdQt3INwuV2gASEHBGeSKtuO7LvNp+kz2cXibaUWzd2GcxyKzEYcrkhQBkjpTSbmwbPuKruf8Alh9KATtDfSalrumXtxod62nwbhcW8jQ7psq23aBIQcMQeSOlE6Z3Ye7ktbCSxt5Zt0dvJt3DyKCcKxHJB9aVySOdSskLtt54zxT+3+Cg/9k=
oh... sry didnt see all the other posts
Yeah that is certainly Holo, you got her spot on. I look forward to seeing more
Spice and Wolf crossover? Auto-win!
(Too bad there's no romance tag for her and Big Mac. XD)
1777109
MAYBE.....
1777110
I am my own most brutal critic.
1777139
Good effort.
1777142
I was SOOO worried that I didn't get her character down. Thanks.
1777180
You got her mischievousness, her wisdom, and her haughtiness as well. Just keep on it, and hell as if you think she is done right
1777210
Thanks!
1777236
WHERE? HOW?
TELL ME!!
1777080 ... You seriously have to ask us that? Seriously? Are you new around here or something? We ship EVERYPONY. Heck, Someone has even shipped Rainbow Dash with THE KITCHEN SINK. Tru story. So yeah, what do YOU think we want? xD
1777351
You're just the readers though. No offense, but to me the readers are just here for the ride.
I am the law. The law is me.
Since you took what I wrote I'm kinda sad that I didn't write something better.
Well anyway the good ground layed in the first chapter holds. Faved and liked.
Keep up the good work, and make this even more awesome.
1777366
Easy there Judge.
1777398
It worked out damn well though. So no worries.
1777399
Hmm that kinda makes sense, BUT I am writing and assuming AJ has a west Texas feel to her country-ness. I live in south Texas so I hear west Texas accents more than you would think and bro isn't too uncommon. HOWEVER I will take your opinion into consideration for future chapters.
1777363 Well, no offense, you shouldn't have made it into a question then! People want to answer questions! If you want to make a statement, then you have to start with 'The thing about shipping is...'
Just so you know. :3
(And yes, that little rant WAS taken directly from a movie. Plus one internet to whoever can name it first! :3 )
1777427
Hmmmmmmmmmmm AJ x Holo, but what about Big Mac???
Hehehehehehe idea!
1777254 Never got this notification, sorry! xD Umm... pretty much everywhere. XD Like its and it's, your and you're, etc are all pretty bad... And I'm seeing a lot of "blah blah blah?/!", blah blah blah. (Regardless of WHAT punctuation you end the phrase with, you don't put commas outside of the quotation marks. :3)
In general, I'd say you need a pre-reader. It's not like the entire fic is bad, just some of the basic grammar type stuff. :3
(Also, could always make it a love triangle or something. XD (Trying to guess at your 'idea'.))
You continue to impress me. I will certainly be following this story closely. Though if I remember the anime correctly Holo was never quite this open with her information. Either way I'm really enjoying the story and can't wait for chapter 3.
1777459
Oh that. Ugh that's because I'm writing all my stuff on my phone which has shit-tastic auto correct feature that I cannot turn off.
1777472
Well it's a different universe. Plus she's known the Apples for a long time.
1777478
Alright give me a sec.
Coolio
1777846
Not bad. Roots within the original S&W but (so far) an original in it's own right.
1778044
I'm just taking the premise and a couple characters (most of which will be revealed later) from the magna/show Spice and Wolf. I will mostly be drawing from the magna.
Liking it more and more.
1778351
Thanks.
When a reader favs a fic and doesn't thumb it, it means that the reader is interested enough to want to know when it is updated (As the fav is the only way to know that) but is waiting for more content before thumbing it (Because the only way to cancel an upthumb is to turn it into a downthumb).
1779892
Fair enough I suppose.
Spices and wolf was a great manga that i had completely forgoted about until i started reading this, and at the start it was a bit hazy in my head since i have read it years ago (Heck i readed it on one manga), but your awesome caracterisation of Horo made me remember everything so good job at getting a new stalker.
1780820
Thank you
1777080 No ship please, I'd prefer to swim.
1785070
Fine I'll just scrap these 2,587 words I typed out.
Well, someone wrote it before I got off my lazy ass to do so. Kudos!
Also, spice and wolf is an economics lesson in anime form for those who don't know.
1788175
That'll show up in chapter 5 or 6 I think.
I had written a much more in-depth review, but what with Firefox crashing, I lost it and my enthusiasm to write the whole thing up once more was drained away. If anything however the point I wish to make is that this story fits a very good niche: whimsical wise wolves & good Apple Family stories. There's just so many things that make the pairing of these two mesh quite nicely, and I'm surprised I haven't heard or seen anything like this until now.
There are definite improvements that can and should be made to make this a more engaging read and you a more developed writer. Spelling and grammar for one (you should take more effort to do a final review before publishing a chapter) spacing (such as when Twilight reads from the handy-dandy wolf book) and pacing.
The pacing, in fact, is my greatest qualm because there is continuing sense that you're rushing toward a part that you're eager to write about. Or that you need to get this out post haste. Don't do that. Take a calm breath, and rather than a mad dash toward the "exciting parts" let's take a stroll through this wonderful story that you've conjured and enjoy the sights...such as a certain wolf's wonderful tail. In both the light novel and anime (it's a bit harder to tell in the manga since you can zoom through reading the panels at your own speed) everything was done in a deliberate fashion rather than hurried, unless it was an action scene. The wheat festival was itself a very suspenseful lead up of Lawrence and Holo's meeting, which you've tried to repeat for the Apple Family but the jerky cut-offs at Holo's name reveal until her own introduction I feel were unnecessary. Since Applejack doesn't know what to make of Holo's appearance revealing her name to the audience at the very least won't change AJ's reaction when pony!Holo makes her introduction.
The scene transitions are jarring to me. No escaping that. I would've liked you to put more detail into a scene before going ahead, y'know? Give my mind something to stand on before moving the story along. In fact, at one point you literally wrote
DUN DUN!
As for the song, I feel it would be served much better to be stretched out in small excerpts over the course of the whole story rather than used to such an extent as you have in the first two chapters. Don't want to overuse it and wear out its novelty, plus I feel there needs to be more Holo antics and everypony's reactions to those antics. There's quite a lot that can be done plot wise, so I'm intrigued with what direction you plan to take.
Overall it's rough around the edges and there are a few potholes, but the premise is solid, the world building you're doing is enchanting (wolves writing in Japanese, what will they think of next?) and simply put, there's a decent foundation to your writing style that just needs experience to improve. Which means you should keep writing. Might I suggest you visit the Editor's Dreamland for some writing help?
Liked, watched, faved.
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A real review? Seriously? A real review for the dribble I wrote?
In all seriousness thanks. I really do appreciate the detailed feedback. As for the pacing yes I know I suck at it due to my weird laziness of not wanting to pound out a wall of massive text (anything over 5k just seems like too much) and my other fault is yes I get one scene in mind and I rush to it.
I'd be glad to join a writers help group that ya know actually helps, since most just seem to do a whole lot of nothing.
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Don't be so harsh on yourself, it's a very poisonous habit. Have some Holo
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Thanks. I'm one of those writers who is their own most brutal critic.
However I am now seriously considering a major rewrite and re-editing of the two chapters I posted already and I'm liking the idea more and more.
The reason I managed to pick that out is because I have the same problem. Now quit bellyaching or else I cut you (with kindness.)
Please no AJ shipping, PLEEEAAASE! You don't even have a romance tag.
As for Big Mac, he gets all the mares anyway, so I couldn't give less fucks. But even if anything happens with BM and Holo, I sincerely hope it's strictly fooling around or stress relief, nothing serious.
Once again I remind you, there is no romance tag.
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Honestly, I doubt I'll toss a romance tag on this one and I do not plan on writing any clop with this story. The next chapter or two should clarify the extant of the "feels" this story will have.
1796150 As for the "fooling around" in my last comment, I meant it as implied (meaning, something happened, we just didn't get to see it.), not clop.
Now for the "feels" to which you are hinting, I assume it's more of a familial, not relational thing...which would be AWESOME!