Act II - 04 - God's Lonely Mare
Act Two:
"You Better Run"
Chapter Four:
"God's Lonely Man"
Twenty Years Later:
Days Without Incident: 230
Fluttershy quietly organized the shelves in the local supermarket in the border town of Greifstadt. Being on the South Griffinhiem side of the border, the town’s population consisted mostly of griffins and ponies that, more often than not, were not welcome in Equestria.
Fluttershy herself was one of those unwelcome ponies. She had spent the last ten years on the run from the Equestrian government, hunted like a wild animal.
All because of New Fluttershy. New Fluttershy had appeared in Fluttershy’s life, and with her appearance, everything Fluttershy held dear was completely and utterly destroyed. But, finally, she had managed to scrape out a simple existence, and had settled down in the small border towns, hoping from town to town as necessary, usually every three months or so. Better to move constantly then to risk being found out again.
Of course, being in such close proximity to Equestria still meant she used a pseudonym. Currently, she had settled on the name Swift Breeze, which she had picked out at random from a crossword puzzle.
Her current job mostly consisted of organizing the shelves, cleaning the floors and bagging groceries. It wasn’t exactly the highest paying job, but the manager of the story didn’t ask any questions and it at least was enough to feed her every night.
Suddenly the voice of the store manager crackled over the PA system.
“Swift Breeze wanted in manager’s office, Swift Breeze wanted in manager’s office.”
Fluttershy’s heart stopped. What could she want with me? She thought. What if she found out about…Her? Various other paranoid thoughts raced through her mind as she stopped what she was doing and shakily started to walk towards the manager’s office.
The manager’s office had the name of the manger stamped on, “Penny Pincher, Manager”
Fluttershy took a deep breath, doing her best to calm down. Calm down Fluttershy, she hopefully hasn’t found out about Her Fluttershy mentally cringed at the next thought …and we don’t want to let Her out either…
She raised her hoof and gently knocked on the plate glass window of the door.
“Who is it?” the muffled voice of Penny Pincher asked from behind the door.
“Um, uh…it’s m-me Fl-Swift Breeze.” She quickly caught herself from revealing her real name. Get it together Fluttershy…
There was a pause. “Oh, yes, come in Swift Breeze, it’s unlocked.”
Fluttershy looked down at the door handle and gently pushed the door open, revealing Penny Pincher’s office.
Fluttershy had rarely, if ever, been in Penny Pincher’s office, so she was rather surprised by the look of the room. It didn’t really look like the office of a store manager at all, but more like that of a teenager’s room. The walls were adorned with various old pictures and posters of some old rock band, along with a plaque declaring Penny Pincher’s status as Primary Store Manger, five years running.
A small CD player sat tucked in the corner, with music playing rather quietly from its speakers. Penny Pincher herself sat at her desk, arms crossed.
“Ah, Swift Breeze, here, have a seat.” Penny Pincher motioned towards the front of her desk.
Fluttershy nodded and quietly sat down, being sure to hide behind her mane as much as possible.
“Care for a cigar Swift Breeze?” Penny Pincher asked, pulling out a rather large cigar and holding it out towards her.
Fluttershy shook her head. “N-no thank you. I d-don’t smoke.”
Penny Pincher shrugged. “Eh, suit yourself.” She lit the cigar and puffed.
There was a long silence between the two as the griffin smoked her cigar and Fluttershy simply sat there awkwardly, hiding behind her mane.
“Now, Swift Breeze,” Penny Pincher said around the cigar. “You’re probably wondering why I’ve called you into my office today...”
Fluttershy nodded. “Um, y-yes...I am…”
“Well, as much as it pains me to tell you this…” Penny Pincher paused, taking another puff from her cigar. “It seems that we’ve been forced to make some cuts around here, and well…” another puff. “It seems your name came up.”
Fluttershy felt her heart plummet like a stone at the griffin’s words.
“W-wait, you mean y-you’re firing me?”
Penny Pincher nodded. “Yup. Sorry, Swift Breeze, but it’s just how the ball rolls. I apologize with all my heart, but we just have to let you go.” She emphasized the last words with a flick of her talons.
“B-but what a-about my p-pay? How am I supposed to pay for my motel room, this job is all I have.” Fluttershy said, her emotions starting to get the better of her in the form of tears welling up in her eyes.
Penny Pincher gave Fluttershy a good long once over.
“Well….” She sighed, “I guess you can take home one last check, something to hold over until you can get a new job.” She put the now much smaller cigar out.
Fluttershy slumped her shoulders and sniffed. “Oh…okay then.” She got up and quietly walked out of the room, the now somber music oddly matching her gait.
“Once again, I’m very sorry.” Penny Pincher said as Fluttershy closed the door of the office as quietly as possible.
Once the door was shut, Fluttershy started to cry quietly, her tears forming a small pool on the ground.
However, her sadness slowly began to transform into another emotion.
That of anger and frustration; anger at the world for bullying up on her so much, and that every time something was starting to look up, the universe would drag her down again.
Stupid griffin. She thought. Why did they have to fire me? I’ve worked hard, obeyed the rules and yet they still fired me. Why? What did I do? Why I should... She suddenly stopped herself. She could feel it coming on.
One of her turns.
The distinct feeling of losing control began to cloud her mind. Panicking she looked in a window.
Oh no.
Her eyes were starting to turn a strange bright shade of green.
She closed her eyes and took several deep breaths.
Calm down Fluttershy...don’t get angry…being angry will only make things worse. Just breath in, breath out… She silently coached herself down from her angry wave. She opened her eyes again and checked her reflection. Her eyes were once more their normal beautiful shade of blue.
Letting out a breath she didn’t even know she was holding, she headed off to collect her paycheck, hoping it would be enough.
After all, things could be much worse.
//////////////////////////
“No please, you can’t!” Fluttershy begged as the motel manager forcefully pushed her out of the small motel.
“Um, yes, yes I can.” The griffin said, slamming the door in Fluttershy’s face. “If you don’t pay, you don’t stay.” His voice muffled by the glass door.
“But please, you don’t understand! I have nowhere else to go!” Fluttershy sobbed, pounding against the glass.
The griffin shrugged. “That sucks. But you were three months behind on your rent. Sorry pony.” He turned away and shuffled behind the front desk, pulling out a rather tattered old backpack, a hoodie and a small bracelet heart monitor and threw them out to Fluttershy.
“That’s yours right? Ain’t nothing else in your room I need to know about?” the griffin asked, crossing his arms, an impatient look on his face.
“N-no, that’s everything…” Fluttershy sniffed. “But p-please, I just g-got paid today, please take it.” She shuffled through her backpack, and pulled out a few bits, holding them out to the manager.
The manger’s eyes lit up at the sight of the money and he greedily snatched the money from her hoof. He counted it, muttering calculations.
“Well…” he continued to count the money, with Fluttershy watching and praying it would cover her bill.
“Nope. Still not enough.” The griffin sighed, pocketing the money.
“But please!” Fluttershy feel to her knees. “Please don’t throw me out…where will I stay?”
The griffin shrugged. “None of my business. Sure sucks to be you.” And with that, he turned around, and slammed the door of the motel behind him, leaving Fluttershy crying out in front.
///////////////////////////
Fluttershy pulled her hoodie tighter over her shivering body. It was a cold, cold night. Her breaths formed small clouds of mist in front her.
She had wandered for hours, hoping to find somewhere, anywhere were she could stay the night or until she had another job. But everywhere she went she was turned away. So, now, with nowhere else to go, she had been reduced to hunker down under an old deserted bridge on the edge of town.
She was completely and utterly alone in the world. She let out a quiet sob as she considered the state of her life.
Suddenly four shadows fell across Fluttershy’s body, distracting her from her dark revere.
“Well, well, well. Would you look at that?” Fluttershy looked up to see a young looking earth pony stallion with a bowler hat and dressed in a white suit. Tucked under his foreleg was a black cane.
To his left stood a large griffin, and a pegasus. To his right stood a unicorn. They were all wearing the same bowler hats and white suits. They all wore the same expression, one of malicious bemusement.
Fluttershy turned pale.
“W-w-what do y-you want with m-me?” she peeped, barely able to speak.
The earth pony laughed. “Well, my little darlin’, we figure that you might have some money to spare, eh?”
Fluttershy couldn’t quite get her head around what the pony was saying, but deep in the depths of her soul she knew it wasn’t good.
“I’m s-sorry, b-but I d-don’t t-think I have a-any m-money.” She panted.
The earth raised an eyebrow. “Oh ya sure?” He leaned in close to Fluttershy. He had a wicked smile on his face, and his eyes glinted with malevolence.
“Y-yes, q-quite sure.” Fluttershy whispered.
Suddenly the pegasus spoke up. “I don’t think the mare has any money Alex.”
The earth pony shot the Pegasus an angry look. “Shut your rot.” He spat and turned back to Fluttershy.
“Well,” he sighed. “It seems this mare don’t have any money, my friends.” He stood back up. He looked at his fellow goons. “What do you guys think? Should we have a little fun with this little mare?” he cast another wicked smile in her direction. “Oh!” his eyes instantly widened as they fell on her backpack.
“Oh well, well, well!” the earth pony reached down and picked up Fluttershy’s backpack in his teeth and chucked it in front of his companions.
“Would you look at that my droogies?” he chuckled. “It seems the mare was hiding something.” He turned towards the griffin. “Dim, check that will you?”
The griffin nodded, and picked the backpack up and rummaged for a few seconds. “Nothin’ here.” He spilled the contents of the backpack on the floor. “Just a bunch of pills.”
The earth pony cast a quick glance at the pile of bottles now laying on the ground.
“Hmm…” he huffed. “That won’t do now will my friends?”
The others all nodded and muttered their agreement.
“Well then. It seems we’ve got a bum on our hooves, do we?” His voice taking an even disturbing tone if that was possible. The others chuckled, sounding like a group of lecherous dogs.
“P-please,” Fluttershy begged. “D-don’t h-hurt me, p-please.” Her mind quickly becoming overwhelmed with fear.
The earth pony simply laughed louder. “HA! Don’t worry darlin’, we’re only gonna teach ya a little lesson in generosity eh?” He pulled out the cane from under his foreleg, with a twisted grin on his face. “Ready boys?”
And with that he brought the cane down hard onto Fluttershy’s side.
Before Fluttershy even had a chance to respond the three others let loose with their respective weapons, sending sharp bursts of pain through Fluttershy’s body. She felt herself beginning to lose control as the sound of her heart rate monitor mixed with the sound of various weapons impacting her body.
Her vision suddenly went a strange shade of bright green.
Oh no. Was Fluttershy’s only thought as she felt her fear and pain transform into another, much more deadly feeling.
The feeling of pure unbridled rage.
Then everything went black.
///////////////////////////
Flutterhulk felt countless pinpricks of pain. Instantly it shot a foreleg out in the general direction of the pain.
A shriek cut through the air as the unicorn thug went flying and slammed into the wall across the way.
Flutterhulk then grabbed the griffin by the tail and slammed him into the wall, his body going completely limp in Flutterhulk’s hooves.
The pegasus tried to flee only to be slammed by a swipe of Flutterhulk’s hooves. He went flying into the bridge above, his body falling to the ground like a rag doll.
This left the earth pony that had already begun to run as fast as his legs could carry him. He didn’t get far before Flutterhulk turned and thundered after him.
Flutterhulk slammed a hoof down on the fleeing pony’s leg, completely crushing it.
He screamed in pain and turned his face now completely pale.
“NO! Please!” he begged.
“FLUTTERHULK SMASH PUNY EARTH PONY!!!!” Flutterhulk roared, and brought it’s fists down directly on top of the trembling pony, crushing him like a bug.
Again and again, Flutterhulk slammed it’s hooves down onto the pavement until the pony below was nothing more than a bloody pulp.
Flutterhulk then let out a defiant roar, and, with that, galloped away.
Days Without Incident: 0
///////////////////////////
A rather small slate grey unicorn mare with a slightly messy dark red mane stood in stood in the general's office.
She wore a rather well worn black windbreaker with the NEIGHS' logo on the back. Tucked in the front pocket of her windbreaker where a pair of aviator sunglasses and her badge. On her flank was a pair of closed hoofcuffs.
She was Equestria's finest fugitive hunter and expert on all things related to her job. Never in her entire ten year career had a fugitive escaped her grasp. In fact, she had been so good at her job, that she eventually was promoted from the Equestrian Marshall's to Equestria's top tier security organization, NEIGHS.
She was Hoofcuff, and she was bored out of her mind.
Director Armor had ordered her to the office of the general for reasons that were unknown to her. She had spent the better part of an hour scanning along the walls where various decorations, paintings and old photos, all showing off the military exploits of past generals. One painting in particular was now the center of Hoofcuff's attention.
It was a rather nice oil painting that showed an orange earth pony mare in what honestly looked like an outfit from a comic book leading her platoon into battle.
On the bottom was a label which read, "Captain Equestria in combat, 1944" and the name of the artist, one Clean Canvas.
Huh, Hoofcuff thought. Interesting….
"Mighty proud of that painting there. It's an original." The low voice of the general caught Hoofcuff's attention. She spun around and was met with a tall Minotaur with the build of a football linebacker.
"Oh, hello General Iron Will, nice to meet you." She reached a slate grey hoof out in greeting. General Iron Will nodded, and shook her hoof.
"Welcome, Agent Hoofcuff, please. Sit down." His voice was welcoming as he motioned to in front of his lavish desk.
"Don't mind if I do." Hoofcuff sat down and started to make herself comfortable, while the general himself sat in a opulent leather chair. Scattered along his oak desk were several dozen manila folders that looked like they were about to explode, several small pictures showing him with various important political figures, boxes of pens and pencils and a jar of Sugarcube Corner's Finest Caramel's.
"Now, Miss Hoofcuff-" Iron Will began, picking up one of the manila folders.
"Please, call me Agent Hoofcuff." Hoofcuff said, her expression hardening slightly. She had spent a good ten years working to be an equal with stallions, and as such, she had developed an intense dislike of the term 'Miss'.
Iron Will smiled. "Okay then Agent," he opened the folder he held in his hands. "I'll be the first to say I don't really like it when Director Armor starts poking around in my business, but, the guys up top like him. That's really the only reason I let you on. Understand?"
Hoofcuff nodded. "Yes. Yes I understand that perfectly."
Iron Will nodded slightly. "You're probably wondering why I've called you into my office today." He started laying the various papers out on the desk.
"Yes, yes I am." Hoofcuff replied as she eyed the papers. All the papers were covered in a red stamp that said 'Top Secret'. This caught Hoofcuff's attention.
"Do you need me to find somebody, because if so, then I'm the mare for the job."
Iron Will nodded, not looking up from the papers. "Yes, as a matter of fact we do. We need you to find this mare right here. She is the single most dangerous mare in Equestria, and is responsible for the deaths of at least twenty ponies." He pulled out a paper and handed it to Hoofcuff, who took it up in her magic.
On the paper was a rather old looking color photo of a yellow pegasus with a long, flowing pink mane.
Hoofcuff raised an eyebrow. "Fluttershy Braveheart?" she thought aloud as she read the name of the pegasus. She had learned from her years of experience that it was often the quiet ones that where the most dangerous. But this mare? For one thing, up until now, she didn't even know this fugitive existed. And second of all, never in her life had Hoofcuff seen such an innocent face on such a killer. In fact, innocent might not have been the right word for it, but fearful. The pony in the picture looked almost as if the very idea of being photographed frightened her.
Hoofcuff paged through the folder, carefully taking in every detail about this mare.
Apparently, five years ago, this mare had stolen some government secrets, and, during her escape, had somehow managed to kill an entire squad of guards. Then, she seemingly dropped off the face of the planet entirely, popping up rarely, leaving a trail of dead in her wake.
As strange as this all seemed, this pony was obviously a grave threat to Equestria and needed to be dealt with swiftly and efficiently.
"Well, are you up for it?" the general asked.
"General…" Hoofcuff said, finally closing the folder. "It seems to me that this just might be the catch of my career. Are you sure this is all the information you have on her?" She set the folder down on the desk.
"Yes. This is all." Iron Will said, his face determined. "So…are you up for it."
Hoofcuff got up and saluted. "Of course. Me and my boys will find her, wherever she is, and make sure she is brought the justice she deserves."
Iron Will smiled. It looked like a confident smile, but something about it made Hoofcuff suddenly feel uneasy.
"Excellent Hoofcuff. I do have one important thing to tell you."
"Really? What?"
"The Equestrian government is obviously greatly concerned and expects that this mission will be a success, so, in order to make sure that you are able to properly complete your mission, me and a special commando unit will be aiding you in this mission."
Hoofcuff nearly did a spit take at the general's words. "What?! Why? Me and my boys are perfectly able to catch this pegasus."
Iron Will shook his head. "Unless you forgot, this mare singlehandedly killed more than twenty ponies in the space of an hour. You'll need all the help you can get on this mission."
Hoofcuff groaned. "But I work best when me and my boys are uninhibited. I don't need any special ops unit."
Iron Will stood up straight, his tall bipedal frame suddenly towering over Hoofcuff.
"Agent Hoofcuff, you will rendezvous with my unit at Canterlot Airfield at exactly 06:00 tomorrow. Or do you want this murderer to escape?" His voice was low and cold, bearing no semblance to the welcoming voice from before.
There was a pause between the two, neither saying a word. "No sir I do not." Hoofcuff finally said, taking a step back.
"Good." Iron Will said, picking up the folder from the desk and walking towards the door. "See you tomorrow."
"Yes sir." Hoofcuff replied as she followed him out of the office.
///////////////////////////
Hoofcuff stood near the entrance of the hanger. Canterlot Airfield stretched out before her, covered in a thin veil of morning mist. Despite the early hour, the airfield cluttered with various pegasi and hot air balloons that were either landing or descending. A tremendous zeppelin loomed behind her, ready to be taxied out to the airfield.
Stupid general... She thought. This is exactly why I like to work alone…always late…
Next to her stood a rather tall and thin unicorn pony with a salt and pepper mane and an off white coat. He wore a brand new pair of aviator sunglasses and windbreaker that matched Hoofcuff's and chewed a piece of gum. On his flank was a flashlight and a starburst pattern, indicating his cutie mark.
"Starlight, where the hay is the general? He said he'd be here." Hoofcuff grumbled taking a glance at her watch.
The unicorn shook his head. "Don't know Boss." He scanned the airfield. "Wait, is that him?" He pointed towards a small closed in jeep with tinted windows driving towards them.
Hoofcuff took a long look. "Yeah…that's him alright."
The jeep came to a stop in front of them, and the doors opened to reveal General Iron Will, in fatigues and a hat. Behind him stepped out a well toned snow white pegasus with a blonde mane cut in the standard military mane cut.
"Ah, Hoofcuff, nice to see you came." Iron Will said, extending a hoof in greeting. Hoofcuff shook it rather tersely.
"General, you said that I should be rendezvous with your unit no later than 06:00 and its 06:30. What took you?"
The General scoffed. "Oh don't be such a bitch Hoofcuff."
Hoofcuff tensed up at the remark. She hated being called that.
"I needed to pick up my most crucial team member." The General motioned towards the white pegasus, who simply stared at Hoofcuff, his eyes covered by his own pair of sunglasses.
"And this is?" Hoofcuff asked, giving the mysterious pegasus a once over. Iron Will turned and looked at the pegasus. Something about him made Hoofcuff feel uneasy, almost as if he was wound far too tight and he might suddenly explode at any moment.
"Oh, right. Hoofcuff, I'd like you to meet Snowflake, former Black Ops." The General said.
At this, the white pegasus nodded and extended a hoof mechanically. "Pleasure to meet you ma'am." He said in a vaguely Scoltish accent. Hoofcuff shook his hoof.
"Same here." She turned to Iron Will. "So you were saying?"
Iron Will handed her a portfolio. "In there are his credentials. You will see that he is one of the most decorated ponies in the force right now, and he has agreed to aid us in our search for the target."
Hoofcuff was silent as she paged through the portfolio. Iron Will was right. It seemed that this Snowflake here had singlehandedly managed to acquire almost every possible military honor. He had been in almost every military operation in the past ten years and in each one seemingly went out of his way to be noticed.
Maybe he's making up for something. Hoofcuff mentally snickered at the thought.
"Impressive." She finally said, levitating the portfolio back to Iron Will. "So, General, when are we setting out?"
"Today. We've just received some crucial information regarding the whereabouts of our fugitive."
Haoofcuff raised an eyebrow. Finally, something that was relevant to her interests. "Really? What?"
General Iron Will motioned towards the zeppelin behind Hoofcuff. "Come aboard and you'll find out."
Hoofcuff nodded and motioned towards Starlight, who followed behind her. The three ponies and minotaur entered the zeppelin and the ramp retracted and the door sealed behind them. Their way down the halls and into what looked like a small conference room.
"Sit down." Iron Will motioned to the table in the office. The three ponies sat down. The lights in the room went out and a projector showed a simple slide show on the screen across the room.
Iron Will cleared his throat. "Okay then. Two days ago, we received some reports of a mare matching the description of our particular little filly coming from the border town of Greifstadt." The sound of the slide projector changing slides was accompanied by what looked like crime scene photos.
Hoofcuff nearly jumped up at the sight.
In one of the pictures, several police officers, a mix of pony and griffin, stood at the edge of the photo. In the center of the photo was a pummeled pile of pulp that looked disturbingly like a body of a pony.
"What in Celestia's name caused that?!" Starlight's voice came from behind Hoofcuff.
"That, Agent Starlight, was caused by our fugitive." Iron Will's words were accompanied by the same photo of Fluttershy that Hoofcuff had seen in the portfolio from the day before.
"Seriously?" Starlight said, his voice betraying his skepticism. "She's the one?"
"Do not be deceived by her apparent innocence. This pony, as you've seen, is capable of incredibly sadistic acts of violence." Once again, Iron Will's words were followed by a new slide, this time showing a griffin in a body cast.
"I take it she caused that as well?" Snowflake's voice came from the left of Hoofcuff.
"Yes. Yes she did." Iron Will responded.
The muffled voice of Starlight saying "Holy crap" greeted Hoofcuff's ears.
Hoofcuff said nothing; instead, she intensely studied each and every slide. She had hunted her fare share of psychopaths and sadists over the course of her career, but the one thing they all had in common, besides their blatant disregard for pony life, was patterns.
Every killer had a pattern, a modus operandi. And, no matter how many slides Hoofcuff saw, that was the one thing lacking from Fluttershy's killing sprees.
It seemed that whenever this pony killed somepony, they would do it in the most violent and out of control way as possible. Almost as if they had no control of their actions.
The only thing that linked said deaths together was one thing. All their injuries were almost always in the form of massive blunt force trauma, like that of a baseball bat or a punch. Except on a scale never before seen by Hoofcuff.
One victim, a griffin, had apparently his entire beak shattered and his legs completely shattered as well.
Iron Will all the while continued to talk, narrating each slide in detail.
"Excuse me General." Hoofcuff raised a hoof.
"Yes?" Iron Will paused.
"Would you happen to have any information regarding this fugitive's life before she was hunted? Something like family members or an old home address?" she turned to face Iron Will, holding a hoof up to block the light of the projector from hitting her square in the face.
Iron Will was quiet for a moment. "You don't need to know anything about that. Haven't you seen enough? This mare is obviously a threat to the entire nation of Equestria. Now your job is to find her, wherever she is, and capture her, ALIVE and bring her back to Canterlot where we can then decide for a proper punishment for her crimes. Understand?" He snapped.
Hoofcuff nodded, taken somewhat aback by the General's sudden showing of aggression. "Yes sir, I just like to have all the information I can get on a target before I set out for them. That way I can more accurately predict their next move."
Iron Will scoffed. "You don't need any of that for her. As I said, she is a sadistic killer and that is all."
Suddenly the screen went blank and the light turned back on, causing all the ponies' eyes to blink rapidly as they adjusted to the sudden presence of light. Iron Will rolled up the screen and turned to Hoofcuff, Starlight and Snowflake.
"Now, this zeppelin is taking us to Greifstadt where you will be filled in on all other details. You are dismissed." He waved his hand and the three ponies got up and exited the room, leaving Iron Will alone.
He looked down at a large portfolio that sat on the table. He opened it, revealing its contents. Various photos of Fluttershy, taken over the course of the ten year hunt. One in particular was at center of his attention.
It showed Fluttershy, wearing a baseball cap and hoodie, looking over her shoulder, almost as if to make sure nopony was following her. A look of fear and unease was on her face.
"Soon I'll find you…and when I do…" Iron Will picked up the photo. "Equestria will be safe from you. Forever…"
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Wasn't expecting the Clockwork Orange reference. Nice.
So:
Iron Will=Thunderbolt Ross
Snowflake=Emil Blonsky
2148327 Yeah pretty much.
And yes, it came to me when I was watching the movie.
Whoa
2148427 Any part in particular?
2148459 The whole chapter was good it's just at the Flutterhulk part, I read it and all I could think was wow
2148669 Wow that's so awesome!
Thanks1
2148970 Hey, this is a bit random but can Flutterhulk fly?
You know, when you said Pony Floyd was playing in the manager's office, I thought it would be something like this.
2149160 Oh my god I so totally should have made it Money....but I was hearing Wish You Were Here....f this I'm going to fix that RIGHT FREAKING NOW *goes off the change the link*
2149114 Um, no I made her unable to fly. her wings are too small to carry her body weight.
But Fluttershy can fly.
2149182
I know, it just sort of made sense - her name is Penny Pincher, after all.
Also, I know that Flutterhulk increases in size when she changes, but how big is she when compared to normal Fluttershy?
2149189 Ah okay, thanks.
2149218 Hmm.....
Well, I guess it depends on how angry she is. But let's say Fluttershy is about 4 feet tall, if she's really angry, she can be up to four times her normal size. So that's up to 16 feet, but that's only when she's REALLY MAD. Usually it's more around 8 feet.
Damn, I can't wait to see who Flutterhulk's enemy is and badass...aw, I was hoping Flutter's would enjoy a smoke, oh well. At least you mentioned it
And I think you meant Hoofcuff
damn, Iron Will and Snowflank, now that is badass...hoping Derpy will have a part even if it's minor in this
Can't wait for more
Great update As I can't wait to read more.
2149802 OH MY GOD HOOFCUFF YOU'RE RIGHT!
And actually I'm still trying to figure out who cast Derpy as. Ugh.
2149819 Actually the next chapter should be coming soon.
Since most of it consists of a scene I wrote awhile back that I think would fit in here nicely.
i can't wait to see when she says the classic line 'please, don't make me angry, you wouldnt like me when i'm angry'
2149992 Oh it'll come...sooner then you think, but longer then you wish.
2149824 It happens bro
and AWESOME!!!!!!!!!!! ALL HAIL DERPY HOOVES!!!!!!!!!!!! Just do us both a favor and don't kill her
2150038 Why would I want to kill her?
She's awesome.
Oh, you teaser. Seriously though that was good.
2150794 Well thank you my good man.
Is Iron Will related to Strong Will? cause if so I can see his motivation being somehow related to that.
2151490 Nope. Strong Will is a pony, he's a minotaur. Any similarity between the two of them is purely chance. Seriously. I needed a name that sounded like an assertive name and "Strong WIll" was the first that came to mind.
When I started reading this I thought of AppleJack as Captain Equestria right away and I'm glad you did a reference to it, Great chapter and its following the movie rather well.
2152161 Well thank you very much.
At first I was thinking of writing my own plot, but then, I figured that I could afford to stick rather closely. Not a carbon copy obviously, but something similar.
Okay, just want this off my back. But I'm uncomfortable that this Flutterhulk, well, kills. Although this is more realistic and dark, I don't think it prevails much, why? Well yes in some versions of Hulks, like Ultimate Hulk (Who gobbled up nurses during an escape), Hulk has killed, but this is only known to modern comic book readers, not casual fans like those who watch the TV series or read the books before the 90s, so you're making these fans like me feel much less comfortable with the Hulk we know and love. A misunderstood beast that just wants to be left alone, why should we leave him alone when he's going around kill people, regardless of his motive. Soldiers doing their duty and Criminals inappropriately punished doesn't do favours. Also it's based in a comic book world reinvisioned by cartoon characters, so you don't need it to be more realistic.
Storywise, you'd have the same effect if you simply left it that Flutterhulk maimed and badly hurt them like the TV series and golden time comic books did. It lets a wider range of readers feel much comfortable, makes us more sympathetic towards Fluttershy (I've only read Act 2 chapter 4) for trying to escape from the government and I assume that Flutterhulk does become a hero, but it's hard to feel she can be one if she's gotten away with man(Pony)slaughter/murder.
Just wanted that off my shoulders anyways, so you can ignore me now if you want your character Flutterhulk off murdering people. But yes the story is a kick-ass so far, but I am distracted that Flutterhulk kills.
Iron will takes the place of that stupid army leader from Hulk. Fluttershy I don't want you to hurt him, well much.
2151542 So does that mean no Betty Ross character?
So who's running Sugercube corner? After all, Pinkie Pie's a secret agent and the Cakes are Professor X and Magneto.
Ok then...
2747076
He likely based mostly drew from the 2008 movie. Hence why it is so dark, and besides, it’s supposed to be played for horror, right?