Less of Me
“Surprise! What do you think, Dash?”
“Uh, what do I think about what, Twi?”
“This, silly! I filled out your official application to the Wonderbolts. I put together your whole curriculum vitae complete with supporting documentation. How do you like it?”
“It’s … okay, I guess.”
“I know, I know, I fibbed a little. I said I was working on an important project all this time, and I even left all my beakers out and left my test equipment turned on to make it look like some grand experiment, but really I was working on this. Sorry if I …”
“No, Twilight, it’s not that. I mean, have you really looked at all this stuff? All these newspaper clippings, and articles, and - sheesh, where did you find all this?”
“All over Equestria, really. That’s what took so long, I had to write to dozens of different ponies and places to pull all this together. So you mean you didn’t want to apply after all? I thought that was still your goal, after your term as Regional Weather Director was up.”
“It is, Twi, it’s just … here, let me show you. Take a look at this journal article, for example. Cloudsdale Aeronautics Monthly, Volume 35, Issue 7. Let’s see, where is it? A Study on the Effects of Varying Tail Lengths on Maneuverability, no, that’s not it … The Bumblebee Effect: Obesity and Early Wing Stress, that’s not it either. Ah, here we go: Use of Negative Pressure and Countercurrents to Disperse Class 5+ Storms, by Prismatic Charge.”
“That’s you, Professor Dash! Do you have any idea how hot it is seeing your name in print in a peer-reviewed academic journal?”
“Yeah, you might have mentioned once or twice that it’s totally smokin’, except that’s not me.”
“What do you mean? You’ve always used ‘Prismatic Charge’ as your pseudonym when you write these intelligent, erudite … “
“Whoa, Egghead, stop right there! The fact that you used the word ‘erudite’ to describe my writing completely reeks of un-coolness. That’s exactly why there’s no way I’m letting the wide world of ponydom know that I got a little more education than I let on, and that I occasionally use it. I’d rather stay Rainbow Awesome Dash, thank you very much, and let Prismatic Charge keep her bylines.”
“Well, what about all the newspaper reports from our trip to the Crystal Empire? Defeating King Sombra and restoring Princess Cadance to the Crystal Throne has to rank right up there for lines to include on every résumé.”
“Did you actually read the articles? I did. Check out this one: … Princess Celestia’s personal student braved the horrors and snares of the Crystal Castle to retrieve the Crystal Heart. Trapped in the tower, she gave the Heart to her dragon assistant, who delivered it to Princess Mi Amore Cadenza in time to … See?”
“But everypony helped, Rainbow! Without all of us working together, we’d never have made it!”
“Let’s be realistic, Twi. While you and Spike were saving the world, the rest of us were doing face-painting and making straw hats. We weren’t even there as the Element Bearers! That whole gig was your mission and your test. We were there for you, not to get our names in the papers. That’s what friends do, right?”
“Loyal to the last, eh, Featherbrain? You know, I never wonder why I love you, Dash.”
“Maybe ‘cause I’m the postermare for stupendousness?”
“Aaaand the romantic moment dies. So, what about the Ponyville-to-Cloudsdale water-lift? You almost set a record, and you did it with Spitfire watching!”
“She knows I was there and she knows I was coordinating the lift. I still can’t put it on the Wonderbolts application, though. Read the official report, about three pages from the end.”
“Okay, let’s see … total wingpower hovered at 795, threatening integrity of the final lift attempt. Finally a late entrant arrived in the form of Ponyville resident Fluttershy, whose incredible last-moment efforts pushed her group beyond the 800 wingpower barrier and ensured success of the attempt … Wait, you wrote this report, Dash. You actually wrote yourself out of the official report and credited Fluttershy with the success?”
“Shy needed the confidence boost more than I needed the fame. I sent her a framed copy of that page afterwards.”
“You get more incredible by the day, Rainbow. I mean it.”
“I hear ya. There’s this hot little librarian I gotta keep up with in the amazingness department, you know?”
“There has to be something here we can use. Maybe this whole magazine article about the changeling attack on Canterlot and the defeat of Chrysalis?”
“Zip, zero, nada. Every official account says ‘the Element Bearers fought bravely but were outnumbered and overwhelmed before they could bring the Elements to the battle’. Which was true, of course. Totally not cool, but still true. Cadance and your brother get the biggest share of credit for turning the tide, along with you.”
“The Princesses can vouch for you, can’t they? And we took down Discord - there’s no denying that one!”
“Getting into the Wonderbolts is about flying skill and attitude, not about who you know. Even if the Princesses all swore that I was there and fighting my flank off, I refuse to mention it because don’t want anypony saying that I got in because Celestia was pushing for it. And let’s not talk about Discord.”
“We were all there, Dash, we worked together to …”
“No, Twilight, we weren’t all there. If I mention that I helped fight Discord, then I have to answer why even though all of us were crazy-fied by Discord, yours truly was the only one who abandoned her friends completely and left. Took off, bugged out, and bailed.”
“That wasn’t your fault, Dash! Discord made you …”
“No, Twilight, just - just stop. Even if I’m the only one who knows it, it still matters to me. We can say ‘the Elements won in the end’ but I know what I did, and I don’t want my name mentioned next to that.”
“I’m … I’m sorry, Dash. I guess I should have asked you about all of this first. I didn’t realize that the wonderful Rainbow Dash I know isn’t the one you want the public to see.”
“Don’t get me wrong, Twi. I love what you did for me - it was a ton of work, and I really appreciate it. It’s not like my vitae is empty. I still saved three Wonderbolts’ lives while winning the Best Young Flyer competition. I went to Wonderbolts Academy, told off Spitfire to her face, and still graduated at the top of my class. And I’m still the only pony in the modern era to do a Sonic Rainboom. Three, really, but who’s counting?”
“All true. Anything else I should include?”
“Something I’d want to admit in public, right? Well, then, you forgot the most important testament to my awesomeness of all! Here, write this down: ‘Rainbow Dash is totally nailing Princess Celestia’s personal stu …’ OW! Hey, what was that for?”
Stats
Page generated in 0.079 seconds
Total duration
943 users online
218,155 hits today, 2,814,898 yesterday
FIMFiction
My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic Fanfiction
Designed and coded by knighty & Xaquseg - © 2011-2024
Follow & Support Us
Support us
SubStar
Chat!
Discord
Follow us
Twitter
MLP: Friendship is Magic® - © 2024 Hasbro Inc.®
Fimfiction is in no way affiliated with or endorsed by Hasbro Inc.®
Great chapter once again. Egghead and Featherbrain is my favourite out of all your stories.
This double-sided take on Rainbow -- i.e., she's actually very smart and "academic" beneath her affected nonchalance -- is pretty interesting, and plays well against Twilight's overt intellectual-ness. (Plus my inner shipper finds them to be ridiculously cute together, but we needn't go there.)
Fun chapter but it's the ending that really cracked me up.
Glorious!
Caught all the. References
That was sooo cute lol.
It was nice to RD being humble for once 
looking forward to the next update.
//dl.dropbox.com/u/31471793/FiMFiction/emoticons/misc_Rainbow_dealwithit.png
This is a common fanon aspect of Rainbow Dash and I think I can see where it comes from. Maybe, on a certain level, Rainbow might be embarrassed of certain parts of her life. She wants to be the carefree, self-sufficient lone-wolf stunt-mare. Unfortunately, she isn't that pony but it won't stop her from trying to appear like that. It's even increasingly reflected in canon - look at Rainbow's surreptitious farewell to Tank in "Strictly for Sidekicks"!
It's odd that she and Scootaloo should be so similar in that respect - both desperate to appear 'awesome' and both terrified that they do not.
I love the ending. Nothing else to say xD
lols to the "Totally nailing Princess Celestia's personal student"
I love the concept of this story, using snapshots of Twidash to propagate it instead of a standard narrative.
And I love, love LOVE mature Rainbow Dash! Cudo's to you, author!
Very nice chap. The whole 'real Rainbow' vs. 'the image of Rainbow' is a really interesting concept to play with. I actually have always liked the idea that there's another side to ALL the Mane 6 that we don't see in the show, and I love how you used it here.
I gotta say, though, most of the chapter got 'my goodness' or 'd'aww' reactions...until that last line. Turned the entire chapter into pure comedy.
I love this story, keep up the awesome work
Loved the ending. XD
Thanks for using my favorite word. You sound so erudite when you say "erudite".
To be fair, that seems like a pretty good marker of how far you've gotten in life. Also, as others have said, I like the way you portray Rainbow. Guarded and egotistical, but far more mature than she ever lets on.
I'd put that on my resume. Under "Achievements".
That ending is great, if it was me I would totally think that statement (but not say it out loud) she has guts.
Awesome chapter, blah blah blah want more blah blah keep up the good work
Laughed at the end :D
Even though the chapters are short, you keep me entertained. And that's good. This story is very cute :D :)
Most comments already say this, but that ending
amazing, good sir.
Whenever I get an email saying a new Egghead and Featherbrain chapter is available, my day is always made better. :)
Why. Are. You. So. Good. At. What. You. Do. There is no narration in this chapter WHATSOEVER. It's all dialogue. AND IT WORKS. IT'S ADORABLE. It's a beautiful thing, what you have done. Keep it up, man. These are just fantastic in every sense of the word.
2051571 I wouldn't have known it was all narration untll you told me
2051571 HOLY CRAP! You're right! Not a single word is outside of a pair of quotation marks! How does that even work!?
2047372
wait, how do you subscribe by email?
I have to know