• Member Since 30th Nov, 2012
  • offline last seen Jul 21st, 2016

A T L A S


It's just a hobby, something I enjoy doing. Maybe one day people will enjoy it too.

T
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(Version 3.0 Updated July 11th 2016)

Spain is my home, and the brotherhood has raised me.
But now I'm lost. Not only in a foreign world, but in myself, and the beliefs I once was raised with.
I've got to go back home.
My name is Jonathan.
This is my journey.

Chapters (1)
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Comments ( 26 )

Well, this is my first story and I'm working really hard on it. "Mi lengua natal es EspaƱol". These episodes are the first ones and I hope you enjoyed them. At some point of the history this fanfic crosses with another one.

Just like the clapper clouds. :rainbowkiss:

This interests me.

Maybe the first episodes could be lame for you, but at some point at the story, Jonathan makes a new friendship, acquires unexpected powers, crosses with another history (fanfic), and becomes mentor... or that is what I'm planing. Episode 10 will involve one of these things. This is my first history, I know that maybe it looks bad, but this kind of histories always have lame beginnings.

And those are not spoilers.

Keep coming with these, it makes a great crossover! Plus it is entertaining. :yay:

omg it was fluttershy =0

I'm editing some chapters, they need more content, I feel them empty. I'm also uploading another one soon....very soon...

Why the dislikes? Very simple: I uploaded it days ago, was very empty and it had many grammatical errors. (I bet it still has).

Comment posted by A T L A S deleted Dec 20th, 2012

But why he still talking

1838216

About what?

Edit: If you are talking about the third/first person narration, it is something you will have to discover at the end of this story.

No i mean he still talk to pony, when celestia have say he cannot

OH MY GOD It's interesting

No i mean he still talk to pony, when celestia have say he cannot

1839603

With "can't" Celestia meant "must not", but Jonathan is a persistent bastard that usually break the rules.

1839718

:rainbowlaugh:

i like this character

This fic would be pretty good if a couple things were different.
1. This guy is a real JERK! He plays hide and seek with Pinkie and just leaves her for 2 days, TOTALLY UNEXCEPTIONABLE! He steals a book from Twilight and doesn't even return it. He was going to freaking INTERROGATE an innocent pony. He tried to shoot Fluttershy!!!:twilightangry2: He has brought nothing but bad things to Equestria and suddenly Celestia helps him out (Not to mention ignoring the whole starving Pinkie for 2 days).
2. There are common errors in the writing (usually minor like 'i' instead of 'I')
3. Everything seems a bit rushed and has far to many links. Maybe 1-3 links a chapter is fine but anymore and your seriously wrecking the Immersion.
4. It's more of a personal qualm but whenever criminals are introduced in Equestria it seriously puts me off. Misunderstood or stylish masterminds are fine, but any petty thieves and stone-cold killers seriously kills what I love about Equestria.

Overall it lacks the dedication and constancy that would make a good story. Also, I'm not very happy with the main character being a jerk. He really hasn't done a single thing that endears me to him. The story feels like it could be good but ends up just leaving a bad taste.
Good Things:
1. Above average descriptions (At least in the beginning)
2. Decent plot line (though its a bit random)
3. Links to music to set the scene
4. A few references (perhaps a bit to many)

Comment posted by A T L A S deleted Jun 26th, 2013

This project is actually on hiatus. I really don't know what to to with this.

Edit: Screw that I'm working on chapter 2 already.

I used to be an adventurer like him...:moustache:

3 years nothing...................................................... yeah its dead

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