Hello! My name is Silver Moon, My favorite pony is Princess Luna, and my OC is Silver Moon. I am fairly good at writing clop.
It was just a regular day in the peaceful town of Clear Water. Human children like me wandered through the streets on this fine Saturday. But I had no friends, other then that boy named Cal, and Charlotte. They knew I was a brony. They were bronies. And on that eculiar Saturday something changed our lives forever...
Yes, the Mane Six fillies, me, and my two best friends meet! Are girls pegasisters? Im a girl. And yes, Im ten. =/
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hnng! dat cover
denver.mylittlefacewhen.com/media/f/img/mlfw4955-1337026609406.gif
Interesting concept you have here. I'll read this tomorrow.
Not bad for a 5th grader.
"Im a girl. And yes, Im ten. =/"
I'M OUT
1717967
Agreed.
i swear i read a story with the exact same title and premise as this one before...
Whoa. Top notch for a 5th grader. Keep going; you've got promise.
Well, for a fifth grader, you've definitely got promise.
The idea is, well... unoriginal. (Ha! Look who's talking) The idea has been done before with many, many of these kind of things. But, you've given it an interesting twist alright. I just hope you can keep it up. Since it's only the first chapter, I don't really have an educated opinion on where this is going. But, that's what's reading it is for, right?
As for the writing itself, a few grammar and spelling mistakes, but it was actually good overall. The pacing was a bit quick, so you may want to watch that. Try drawing your sentences out with more detail to give the reader a picture of what you're trying to give them. Like, try describing more of the scenery, or how the characters feel, not to mention why they feel that way. However, don't draw it out too much, that makes the story boring if you go on for three paragraphs talking about the same thing. Also, watch for the show vs. tell rule. Always remember to SHOW the readers what you're trying to saw, rather than just TELLING them. For that, description is key!
But, you're a ten year old, I can't really ask that much out of you. You're still learning, yes? Truth be told, I'm only four years older than you, so I'm still learning myself. Gender doesn't have anything to do with it, in my opinion. I'm a girl as well, so don't worry about it. However, you're doing well, so keep it up! Good luck!
Yes, a new chapter! I felt actually kinda good about this one! Especially since the Legend part. Thats my favorite legend - The Tale of The Four Dragons.
1718038 me too..
Hmm.. this story has potential.. i shall watch this and see how it goes
After rereading this, I have to say that this reminds me a bit of My Little Dashie...
1720053 i wonder why?... is it because its the same idea? but all things aside this is a pretty good story especially for a 10 year old, so here take this mustache
I really liked the fact that you made Derpy and Dr Whooves here parents, at least i think you did it might just be a trick 
I am a 5th grader too but a boy and from a diffrent contrey so i dont speak or write very well
1728413
Actually, I did make Derpy Hooves and Derpy their parents. I wanted to include them somehow, so....
u know that all this stuff of fillys on earth is becuse of MLD
There needs to be some thing like i don't know GTA V ONLINE! that would be awesome
I realize that this comment is VERY late, considering when this chapter was released, but...
I think that you did a good job, especially considering your age at the time of writing. You are very descriptive, using specific color names as well as incorporating emotion. If you decide to pursue writing, I think you would be good at it.
P.S. I don't know if you've heard of FIMfiction's School for New Writers group, but if you haven't, here's the link. They have a lot of helpful resources for writers, including how to create OC's, World building, and all kinds of other topics, with more added all the time. Just a thought,if you decide to continue writing (be it fan fiction or original stories.)