Clouds

by Phantom Shadow

Clouds

They found themselves lying on the grass outside of their clubhouse staring at the blue sky overhead. It was Saturday, so they didn’t have any school that day. Because of this, the Cutie Mark Crusaders had agreed to meet at the clubhouse to try out some new ways to earn their Cutie Marks. However, Scootaloo and Sweetie Belle found themselves waiting for Apple Bloom to arrive so they can begin their escapades for the day.

“How much longer?” asked Scootaloo as she stared, blankly, at the sky.

“A little while, I hope,” said Sweetie Belle, “She just has a few chores to finish up around the farm. When she’s done, she said she’ll meet us here. At least, that’s what she said when I went to go get her.”

Scootaloo moaned in annoyance and rolled onto her side. “What are we even doing here, anyway? Why can’t we wait in the clubhouse?”

“Because there’s nothing to do there,” explained the unicorn filly, “Since it’s such a nice day, I figured we could wait for her out here.”

“There’s a lot less for us to do out here, you know,” said the annoyed Pegasus as she rolled on her back again, “I’m so bored!”

“Oh come on. It’s not so bad.”

“Speak for yourself.”

After that, the two fillies stared at the sky in silence, watching a few clouds beginning to roll by. When Sweetie Belle saw the puffy white pillows in the sky, she smiled and stared at them, turning her head a little to investigate one in particular a little more. When she did, the smile on her face grew a little bit wider.

“Hey, Scoots,” she said, pointing a hoof at the cloud for her friend to see, “Look at that cloud!”

Scootaloo stared at it for several moments, not sure why she was staring at a cloud in the first place. Several seconds went by before she directed her attention to her friend, an eyebrow raised in a mix of confusion and annoyance.

“It’s just a cloud, Sweetie Belle,” she said flatly, “What’s so special about it?”

“Tilt your head to the left,” the white filly instructed.

Rolling her eyes, Scootaloo did as she was instructed and cocked her head to the left. When she did, she looked at the cloud again. Her feelings for it didn’t change as she stared blankly at it. She quickly glanced over at Sweetie Belle, who was staring at the cloud with a smile on her face. Scootaloo looked back at the cloud, the same look as before still there. This time, she squinted her eyes, hoping to see whatever it was that her friend was looking at.

After several seconds of seeing nothing but a white cloud slowly rolling past, Scootaloo said, “It still looks like a cloud to me, Sweetie Belle. What do you see that I can’t?”

Letting out a small giggle, Sweetie Belle said, “Don’t you see it? It looks just like a bunny!”

Wide-eyed and full of surprise, Scootaloo looked at the cloud again. Tilting her head again, she looked at the outline of the cloud. She couldn’t really see any resemblance between the furry animal and the cloud, but she tried nonetheless.

“I don’t see it,” she said, raising an eyebrow again, “It doesn’t look anything like a bunny.”

“Sure it does,” giggled Sweetie Belle as she pointed her hoof at it, outline certain parts of it, “See, that small part there is the head, there’s the long ears and right there is the legs! Do you see it now?”

Again, Scootaloo squinted her eyes at it and focused her attention to where the white filly had pointed out. As she did, the look on her face relaxed a bit and a small flicker of a smile came across her mouth.

“You know, it does kind of look like a bunny, doesn’t it?” she said, looking at her friend.

“I told you it did,” said Sweetie Belle as she smiled back at her.

Silence dawned on the two of them as they stared at the sky some more, staring at the clouds above them. Now that Sweetie Belle had mentioned something to do, Scootaloo wasn’t as bored as she was nearly 10 minutes ago. So, the two of them found themselves staring at clouds some more, determining the looks of each one that passed them.

“What about that one?” asked Scootaloo as she pointed a hoof in the air, “What does that look like to you?”

Sweetie Belle stared at the cloud her friend pointed at, looking at it from any angle her head would allow. Soon, she smiled and said, “It looks like a spaceship!”

Scootaloo raised an eyebrow at her, turning her head to face her. “A spaceship? It’s clearly an ice cream cone, Sweetie Belle.”

The white filly blinked twice at her friend before redirecting her attention back to the cloud. She tilted her head from left to right, narrowing her eyes as she did. After a few moments of investigating, she smiled and nodded.

“You know, you’re right,” she agreed, “It does look like an ice cream cone. Silly me, thinking it was a spaceship!”

The two of them let out a laugh before they directed their attention back to the puffy white cotton balls in the sky. They watched as the slowly made their way across the blue sky, almost as if they were slowly being pulled by some imaginary string, slowly and gently. The two fillies could only smile as they watched two clouds beginning to merge with one another, making a different shape entirely.

“What do you think that one looks like?” asked Sweetie Belle as she pointed to the newly formed cloud.

Scootaloo tapped her hoof on her chin, trying to decipher what the shape of the cloud was. She turned her head left and right, narrowed and widened her eyes, and shifted to her left and right. She even sat up and looked closer at the cloud, trying her best to make out what the cloud was. No matter how hard she tried, she just couldn’t figure out what the cloud looked like.

Eventually, after several minutes of looking at it at every angle she could possible muster, Scootaloo threw her hooves in the air and said, “I give up! I can’t tell what it is!”

Sweetie Belle let out a small giggle, catching the attention of the orange Pegasus.

“Don’t you see it?” she asked, suppressing her giggles as best as she could, “It looks just like you!”

Scootaloo’s eyes widened as she slowly turned her attention back to the cloud. She stared at it for what felt like an hour, trying her best to see the resemblance between herself and the white puffy cloud above them.

“I really don’t see it, Sweetie Belle,” she said, looking confusingly at her friend.

“Don’t you see it?” the unicorn filly asked as she sat up with Scootaloo. Then, she pointed her hoof at the cloud and continued. “Right there is your head, right there are your wings, and right there is your tail!”

Scootaloo decided to look at the cloud again, still skeptical that the cloud looked anything like her. She focused on the spots that she pointed out to her, adjusting her eyes so that she could see what Sweetie Belle meant. All the while, she kept her own image in mind, trying to plaster herself on the cloud to see if there was a match. When she did, she stared at it, her eyes slightly more widened than they were before. Shortly after that, a smile had found its way across her face.

“You know something,” she said, turning her head to face Sweetie Belle, “I think I see it!”

“Really?” asked Sweetie Belle, her eyes beaming and a smile across her face.

“Yeah,” she said, “I can see me in there. It’s a little disorientated, I must admit, but if you really look, it does look like me.”

The two fillies let out a laugh at Scootaloo’s statement, cupping their hooves over their mouths to try and suppress the laugher as best as they could.

“What’s so funny?” asked a voice from besides them. When the two of them looked up, they saw that Apple Bloom was approaching them, a smile on her face.

“There you are, Apple Bloom,” said Scootaloo, “I was beginning to wonder when you’d show up! What took you so long, anyway?”

“Sorry ‘bout that,” said the yellow filly, “Ah got caught up with my chores, is all. Now that they’re all done, we can go Crusadin’, just like we agreed!”

The two of them nodded to Apple Bloom and began to make their way to the clubhouse. However, they noticed that Apple Bloom wasn’t walking with them. When they saw this, they stopped their trotting and stared at the southern earth pony.

“What’s wrong, Apple Bloom?” asked Sweetie Belle.

“Well, ah had asked ya’ll a question,” said Apple Bloom, an eyebrow slightly raised and a smile on her face, “What were ya laughin’ ‘bout earlier?”

Scootaloo said, “We were just looking at the clouds. Sweetie Belle said that the one right there looked like me.”

She pointed a hoof at the one in particular and continued, “I didn’t see it at first but, after closer examination, I can see it, sort of.”

Wasting no time, Apple Bloom looked up at the cloud that the orange Pegasus pointed at. When she did, she too let out a small giggle.

“Ya know, it does look like ya, Scoots,” she said, “And that one there looks like a turtle...sort of. Ya know, this is actually kinda fun!”

The Cutie Mark Crusaders let out a laugh together. Then, the three of them sat together on the grass and continued to watch the small white clouds roll past through the sky.

~End~

A/N: Song of Inspiration

Comments

[Seether00]

Dawwww!

[Regidar]

DIABEETUS

[Church]

Curse you, you've found my weakness. I love anything about clouds.

Not too bad at all! Just a sweet little tale, nothing extravagant, simply a pleasant read. I like that.

There was one thing that was off. The clouds in Equestria can't move on their own (you probably know this). But for the sake of this story, I don't really care about that.

Another thing, I don't think Scootaloo would say "disorientated". But that's just me being picky.

You got a like and a fave from me, so keep doing this. The fandom needs more stories like this.

- Church

[Someguy987]

It's a nice story. No romance no drama no sex no violence. It feels good just to sit and watch the world end isn't it

[fluttershywriter]

Why am I so in love with this fic?

[The Rarispy]

So simple, yet so fulfilling.

I love slice of life one-shots like this one.

[Draco Dei]

A nice enough little story. A little boring, but that is OK.

[NeutronStar]

I like it! Short, but really sweet.

1713649

I don't think Scootaloo would say "disorientated"

After seeing the ending of the episode "One Bad Apple", it's not hard to imagine Scootaloo saying something like that.

[Something Eight]

i1.kym-cdn.com/photos/images/newsfeed/000/225/378/sweetie%20belle%20that%20is%20beautiful.jpg

[Phantom Shadow]

1713633>>1713635>>1713649>>1713817>>1713927>>1713944>>1714022>>1714050>>1714527
Thank you all for the support! I honestly didn't think this story would be that good, but you all have proven me wrong [again]. It didn't need anything extravagant to happen; just a simple, soft, cuddly story will suffice from time to time!
Thanks again!

[BronyDerp117]

They watched as the slowly

You mean 'the clouds'?
Short and sweet. I liked it.
Wait...
ZOMFG A CLOUD SHAPED LIKE A TURTLE!!!
Sorry, I just LOVE turtles.

[Diamond Sparkle]

That fic could be in the show, it's so sweet.

[punisher143]

Adorableness.

[CluelessFilly]

Aw man, you hit me where it hurts!

I mean that this was adorable!

[Knight of Cerebus]

Hnnnnnnnnnnggggggg

[Bradel]

This was very nice. Thumbs-up. I particularly liked Apple Bloom's accent (which can be hard to get right, but which I think you've absolutely nailed here) and the concrete descriptions relative to the clouds, the "Right there is [X], over there is [Y], and then there is [Z]." It's pitch-perfect. Gives you just enough information to envision the characters in the scene without overloading the reader by providing too much detail. Good rhythm and sentence structure, though that pretty much goes without saying if you're getting certain descriptive passages pitch-perfect.

I do think this could benefit from another editing pass, though. There's a tense agreement problem in the last sentence of the first paragraph, and just below that there are two lines of dialogue which seem logically incompatible. I noticed a couple other places with word choice issues or confusing detail, the sorts of things that a thorough editing pass should be able to find and fix.

Thanks for the story!

[Phantom Shadow]

2050943
Thanks for the feedback, mate. I really should get a pre-reader or two to help with the editing! Thanks for the tips!

[RibaBian]

Sweet. Cute. Simple. Love it

[Phantom Shadow]

2185762
thanks, mate

[TwizzleDragon]

That was adorable.
Have a like.

[Themaskedferret]

Very sweet.

[Phantom Shadow]

4757314
Thanks, mate! I appreciate it!

[Starlight Nova]

Why isn't there an Apple Bloom tag?

[Phantom Shadow]

9193447
She wasn't the central focus, so I didn't feel she should be added. If you feel she should, I'll be more than happy to add her

[TheFlint44]

Hello! I'm a Chinese brony and I did a little translation of your cute story. Here's the link. Hope you like it.

This is what I call real slice of life.

[Phantom Shadow]

11055031
I don't know what I feel more: honored that this story is worth translating it for Chinese bronies to read, or horrified that the Chinese are going to come after me now

LOL! J/K!

Thank you for taking the time to translate this story, as well as enjoyed it! It means a lot to me!