• Published 19th Nov 2012
  • 6,812 Views, 791 Comments

The Missionary - Radon18

Follow a man, surviving in equestria with nothing but his wits and his faith, oh and his own town.

  • ...

Chapter16: THE END of the beginning

Chapter 16

(Reminder that I own nothing!)
“Words in a foreign language.”
“Quoting in thought”


The Crusaders stared at the implacable white barrier that was the yellow house’s door. Sweetie Belle stuck her tongue out in concentration and reached for the doorknob with her magic. The brass sphere was enveloped in a tentative, minty-green aura and began to rotate. A beads of sweat formed on Sweetie Belle’s forehead as she concentrated on the doorknob. Inexperienced as she was in magic, it was all she could do to maintain a standard telekinesis spell. Slowly the mechanism turned... slowly...


The doorknob sprung back into place as Sweetie Belle’s aura evaporated. She let out a breath she didn’t know she had been holding.

“Aw, c’mon Sweetie Belle,” Scootaloo moaned. “Can’t you just open the darn thing already? I wunna see what’s inside!” She was bouncing up and down on her hooves in anticipation. This was the home of the alien. They were right on the doorstep of the home of the first alien ever and Sweetie Belle couldn’t even open the door.

“Sorry.” Sweetie Belle gave Scootaloo a look. “Moving stuff with magic isn’t like ordering it around or something. You grab it with your magic just like you grab stuff with your hooves. Only... I guess you aren’t really touching it.”

Scootaloo arched an eyebrow. “So...?”

“So? It’s a really smooth doorknob!” Sweetie Belle huffed. “... and I maybe haven’t gotten very good at magic yet,” Sweetie Belle finished as she sat back on her haunches and rubbed her hooves together in embarrassment.

Scootaloo snorted and stamped a hoof in impatience. “C’mon Sweetie Belle. You’re the only one who can reach it!” She tapped the cloth packet hanging beneath her chin. “You wunna try using the marble?”

Sweetie Belle looked like she’d just been asked to handle a live snake. “Are you nuts?” she asked. “What if I accidentally blow the door up?”

Apple Bloom gave her a look. “What makes ya think ya’ll are gunna go blowin’ stuff up?”

“I’ve seen what you two can do with that thing. And how hard it was to control on the first try. I don’t want to scare-”

Scootaloo, apparently fed up with being stuck on the edge of what was going to be the most awesome discovery in pony history, gave her wings a mighty flap, popped up just high enough to wrap her left hoof around the doorknob, and let her own weight turn the knob. The impenetrable barrier yielded and swung open.

Scootaloo laid a hoof against the marble’s bag; it was lukewarm. She gave her two friends a flat look. “I told you two that it wouldn't burn the bag if we didn’t use it too long.”

Apple Bloom and Sweetie Belle each gave Scootaloo an apologetic shrug before the three Crusaders entered the yellow house.

The room beyond the door was as sparsely furnished as it was bizarre. The left half of the room was dominated by a massive green couch while the right side was taken up by a pair of bookcases supporting a myriad of glossy black boxes, all varying in width, length, and depth. Around the boxes were other items that the Crusaders could actually recognize, namely picture frames and actual books with an odd bauble stuck here or there. There were two doors branching off of the room, one on the far wall and one leading off to the right, beside the bookcases. Everything looked stretched out and elongated, like it was made for ponies that were at least as big as the princesses.

The only sign of life was a single, warm yellow light that shone from the portal to the right.

“Hey guys look at this!” Scootaloo hissed in a whisper. She hopped up to one of the higher shelves and snatched a picture from its perch before falling back to the floor. The photo in the frame was of two alien creatures, one with a long black mane, wearing clothes that were pink and fuzzy looking; the other had a very short brown mane and was wearing a blue garment with plaid pants. The one in pink was kissing the other one on the cheek as the other blushed and smiled, they were both sitting on the green couch on the other side of the room and were holding mugs full of some sort of brown stuff.

“Aww, they look like special someponies.” Sweetie Belle couldn’t help but squeal a little as such an obvious romance between the two odd looking aliens.

“Bleh, you’re right. They sure do look funny.” Scootaloo looked like she had just swallowed something sour. “Hey, wait. Doesn’t your older sister have pajamas like that, Sweetie Belle?”

“Wha-? How would you even know about that?”

Apple Bloom was staring at the photo, deep in thought when shuffling noises from the lit room drew the attention of the three fillies. Apple Bloom poked her head through the doorway next to the shelves looking for the source of the quiet noises. Her eyes opened wide at the surprising sight.

“Girls, come’re, and hush.” Apple Bloom whispered at the other two crusaders peaked around the plain white door frame and gasped.

There, struggling back to its strange upright posture, was one of the creatures from the photo. It was tall, the only thing the girls had ever seen that rivaled its height was a minotaur that had passed through town a while back. The tall, brown maned alien was wearing a thick, blue jumpsuit with hard-looking black pieces strapped onto it. Around its torso was wrapped an oddly bulky tan vest. It had bandages wrapped around its form in several places, almost all of them soaked through with the same red fluid they had followed all the way from the mechanical monster. The three girls grimaced and glanced at each other, they had unknowingly followed the alien’s blood trail all the way here.

“Should we go get Fluttershy?” Scootaloo was the first to speak up, trembling a little at the sight, the past few days were finally getting to her.

“Yeah, it looks really hurt.” Sweetie Belle whispered.

“Good idea girls.” Apple Bloom whispered back before turning to get one more peek at the alien creature.

The alien was staring right at them. Apple Bloom gasped and started to back away, the creature was leaning heavily on the wall and its eyes were locked on the Crusaders. Apple Bloom couldn’t help but see the flat look on its face it was almost as if it had known they were there the entire time. It raised its arm, the strange grasping paws holding a shiny lump of metal. Just as the three girls turned to dash out of the house, a loud ear splitting BOOM echoed through the quaint house. The girls panicked and ran for it, bits of the ceiling raining down on them like a plaster hailstorm.


The newly minted Eleison Melrose skipped and twirled down an empty street. One fascinating aspect of her masterpiece that she failed to anticipate was the sense of feeling. She had never before inhabited a body that amounted to more than bones and tendons. To be bound in skin and to touch with the sensations of actual flesh was euphoric.

Now that she really had true senses the world was so much brighter, so much more vibrant. She wanted to see and touch and smell and taste everything! The events concerning John and the pony invaders was almost shoved into the back of her mind, almost forgotten in favor of skipping down the delightfully cold street, reveling in the feel of the cold breeze in her long shaggy red hair, or the warm rays of the sun, even the feeling of the clothes she had garbed herself in was adding to her wonder.

“Laa la la dee dee da... la laaa de dee daaaa de da~!” Eleison sang loudly, unsure of where the song had come from, it didn’t really cross her mind that she should even care. She just wanted to give a voice to that happy feeling that was coursing through her being. A thought hit her in the middle of a verse and she quieted for only a moment to listen to her own thoughts.

‘I think this day could only get better if John were here!’ Elieson nodded in appreciation of her own brilliance, that was a wonderful idea! ‘I’ll just have to go get him!’ She concluded and resumed to dance in the direction she felt his presence, only slightly faster than she was moving before, taking time to caress the rough, dormant limbs of a shrub, or the smooth door panel of a car as she passed.


Luna, Princess of the Night, looked over the crippled piece of machinery that the alien had used to assault the convoy. Her Night Guard had spread out and taken up sentry positions around the partially collapsed building to make sure nothing would interrupt her investigation. The Wonderbolts had come as well and had, with the exception of Fleetfoot, stuck to Luna like glue. Fleetfoot had simply vanished several times without explanation only to return minutes later.

The machine lay broken and lifeless on a mound of rubble. The alien construction intrigued Luna to no end. She imagined that Chris’ race had to have been naturally talented in machining and construction. Who else but a culture dedicated to craftsmanship would be able to produce a device of this size and complexity?

While Luna was preoccupied with examining the strange construct, Fleetfoot vanished behind the machine for a small while. When she reappeared she was holding a small, white and red bottle in her mouth. She quickly handed the item off to Spitfire.

“What the hay is this?” Spitfire mumbled as she examined the little empty container. Fleetfoot only shrugged.

Luna managed to tear her attention away from the machine long enough to witness Soarin detach a wooden case from his side. He opened it to reveal a set of fine, glass instruments and several reservoirs filled with miscellaneous alchemical reagents.

“Hmm, smells fruity,” Spitfire intoned as she sniffed, scrutinized, and examined the small amount of thin, red fluid that had been left behind in the bottom of the bottle. There was little more than a sip’s worth left. Holding the white and red container upright, Spitfire carefully picked a wide-necked glass bottle from the case and placed it upside down onto the foreign container, so that the wide bottle’s edges were flush with the interior of the glass. Slowly, she upended the two bottles, pouring the red liquid into the new container. Carefully, she set the white bottle on the ground and handed the filled glass off to Soarin.

Soarin took the glass from his commander and, using the rigid tip of his longest flight feather, scooped a small portion of sandy yellow powder from one of the case’s reservoirs. He poured this down the neck of the bottle and waited.

The fluid bubbled vigorously for several moments and turned from bright red to a muddy brown before it settled. Soarin blinked at the concoction in his hooves. “...Wow.”

“You got a result already, Soarin?” Spitfire asked as she sauntered up behind him.

“Uh, yeah. Big one too. Don’t drink any of this stuff.” Soarin poured the product of the test into the dirt and began wiping down the dirtied glassware with a rag from the case. “This... whatever it is has a lot of caffeine in it. Like, way more than the legal limit.”

Spitfire arched an eyebrow. “How much more?”

“Uhh...” Soarin traced several numbers in the air with his hoof. “If the reaction fits in with that chart the Academy gave us, a bottle of this stuff will probably put you right into the muscle spasm stage of caffeine poisoning, plus all the nasty magical side effects.”

Spitfire looked at the unassuming bottle like it was about to explode.

Several of the Night Guard cast incredulous looks at the off-white pegasus. Alchemy was not yet a trusted science among the masses, not even the Wonderbolts themselves believed very much in its validity, but they were willing to make an exception when dealing with a completely alien substance.

Luna listened with great interest. Truth be told, despite her commanding position in Equestrian politics, Luna was relatively ignorant of the nature of caffeine. It had only become a health concern once Equestria had begun importation of coffee, around a year ago. While ponies had ingested caffeine for as long as anyone could remember, it had always been in small amounts, usually in tea. The concern was that the concentration of caffeine found in stronger coffees could be lethal to most ponies.

“Commander Spitfire, I am not sure I completely understand. Exactly how much caffeine would that require?” Luna asked.

“This stuff's got as much as two big cups of pure Dragon Country Black,” Spitfire replied, trotting over to the machine and starting to dig through the wreck.

Luna cocked her head slightly, that was a lot but it was still within the legal limit, if only barely. “I fail to see how-” She was interrupted by a sudden cascade of white bottles.

“This much could kill a large pony a few times over, and they’re all empty.” Spitfire commented, her head poking out of the top of what Luna assumed was the driver’s position of the machine.

“Woah.” Soarin kicked a bottle. “So not only did the guy hit us with this thing,” He gave the twisted metal arm a swift kick, earning a metallic thunk, “But he was also drugged up while he was doing it! I knew that thing was no good.”

Luna frowned and was about to voice her displeasure with Soarin’s attitude when Soarin was suddenly bowled over by three fillies. The sentries looked at each other sheepishly, all having failed to notice three screaming panicked fillies.

“Theresaalienwefounditithadthisthingitmakesstuffexploaditsrightdownthestreetyouhavetogogetit!” The fillies were speaking with such panic that not even Luna herself could understand their babbling.

It took several minutes to calm the foals down enough so that they could be understood. The trio claimed to have spotted the creature, alive and tending to its wounds in a dwelling not far away. Luna thought it was a little strange that it had chosen to hide in a little yellow house. ‘Oh well, it is not like Discord never hid in stranger places. In the end, it does not matter, I have a creature to catch.’


Applejack sighed and massaged her temples, listening to Twilight blather on with the slightly grating Professor Beaker could drive anypony to break into the cider cellar. The two brainiacs had been arguing for hours about the similarities between the runic language of the diamond dogs and the written language of... whatever it was Chris happened to be.

“That is correct, but if we assume the diamond dog ruins are perhaps a precursor or a primitive version of the alien script it fits with Quick Quill’s theory of language morphologie.”

“Perhaps, but what of the uniformity and perfection of the alien script? How could they have printed all of this material so neatly? It certainly isn't handwritten and even a printing press would have worn out its dies by the time half of this was printed. Recasting them always leaves subtle differences.”

“I don't know Professor, perhaps it’s all-”

Applejack put her hoofs over her ears. ‘Yep still going at it...’

Having had enough mind numbing babble for now, Applejack trotted over to the now conscious Celestia’s bedside. “How you doin’ Princess?” She remarked casually as she sat down next the pile of cushions.

“Much better,” Celestia rasped, her laboured speech made Applejack wince a little. “I will be back on my hooves in no time.”

“Pardon mah manners Princess, but that looked like it wasn't something that can be trotted off in ah day.” Applejack looked on with concern, shifting her eyes to take in the angry red abrasions on the alabaster alicorn’s side.

Celestia sighed, she had already had this very conversation with Twilight. “Applejack, you are right. It was a painful experience and I was ill prepared for anything on the magnitude of what we faced. I paid the price for it, but far better it be me than any of you.” Celestia looked at Applejack with the same motherly expression she often showed to Twilight.

“What ya think got inta that critter anyway? Its not like we were gonna kill it or anythin’.” Applejack kicked her hoof back and forth looking at the ground with a scowl, nothing in her mind could justify the creatures behavior. It just didn't make any sense.

Celestia was surprised at the question, the other Elements had responded to the attack with anger, worry, or even indifference, but only Twilight had sought to understand the creature before the Element of Honesty and she was going about it in her own way, failing to try and understand the alien’s true motivations. Only Applejack had taken the time to ask the simple question of ‘Why?’

“I fear... that this whole incident is my fault,” Celestia rasped, a sudden look of sorrow and weariness creeping into her eyes. “I did not anticipate that the short incarceration would be so detrimental to the... to Chris. He even told us that we had not fed him properly. I thought little of it at the time. He was alive, looked healthy, I thought that was all that mattered. I knew he was like a pony in his mind, I focused so intensely on how he was the same that I discounted his differences.” Celestia ignored the sudden look of anger on Applejack’s face. Before Applejack’s pride and patriotism compelled her to ignorantly defend her Princess, Celestia cut her off. “He was afraid, dear Applejack,” the Princess said sadly.

Applejack understood. After all, the quickest way to get bit by a timberwolf was to corner it, and Chris certainly had been cornered for just about his entire stay in Ponyville. Chris must have been terrified when he saw the Princesses’ escort waltzing up to his home all armored up and mean. Applejack wondered if Fluttershy had figured all this a long time ago. Probably, she’d spent an awful amount of time with Chris, if anyone had known then it would have been her.

“Ah understand Princess...” Applejack looked at the ground, feeling more than a little bull headed for not noticing earlier. “He asked us to let him go, ya know?” Applejack finally spoke up, suddenly sounding a little downtrodden. “He promised not to hurt anypony if we would just let him go home..."

Celestia looked saddened by that little bit of knowledge, if he had immediately sought to try and bargain his way to freedom after the fiasco that occurred after he was first released then it spoke volumes about his current attitude.

"Ah didn't come here to help Chris. Ah felt like ah was wastin’ time chasin’ after some dumb critter when ah could be protectin’ tha’ farm. Tha’ only reason I came was in case Twi an’ the girls needed me. But ah understand what you mean.” Applejack looked a little more at ease now. “Everthin’ will turn out fine, just like it always does. We’ll get the critter back and make em feel right at home with a little ol fashioned Ponyville hospitality!” Applejack hopped to her hooves, apparently raring to go.

Celestia looked a little surprised but smiled at the Element of Honesty's admission and determination to make amends. Her thoughts were interrupted by a sudden commotion as a Night Guard burst into the room and instantly rushed to Celestia’s bedside. “Your majesty!” The mare looked like she had sprinted the entire way.

“Yes, is there a problem?” Celestia asked, still managing to pull off her usual royal countenance despite her wounds and hoarse voice.

“Princess Luna is on her way to apprehend the alien, three fillies tipped us off one of the wonderbolts is bringing them in now.” The mare reported, breathing through her nose as she managed to give the report without gasping for breath between every other word.

“And just what were three fillies doing out here all on their own?” The Princess allowed her gaze to harden. A loud groan come from where Applejack sat.

The Night Guard glanced at the orange mare, who was grumbling angrily. “Eh, We don't know. They were hysterical when we found them, not much of a state to give many details.”

“I need to go.” Celestia stated simply, hissing slightly as her movement agitated the numerous angry red abrasions scattered over her body.

“Your majesty! You need your rest, Princess Luna will handle it, The Night Guard pleaded, flustered.

“My sister is neither the most subtle nor the most gentle of ponies and this is a very delicate situation. I need to prevent any further misunderstandings.” The Princess of the Sun headed for the doors without so much as a glance back at the other two ponies.

Applejack and the Night Guard looked at one another in silence for a moment before scrambling after her. “Princess wait!” they both shouted. The rest of the Elements scattered around the concrete room noticed what was going on and made to follow, only to stop as three fillies rushed into the room, shortly followed by a harried looking Soarin, and practically tackled Applejack to the ground, still scared out of their minds. All three were waving their hooves around and talking in a jumbled mess about an alien that could make things explode just from pointing.


I groaned as I pushed myself off the wall I was leaning on and stumbled into the living room of what once was my home. My eyes lingered on the cold wood of a door at the end of the hall, where our bedroom had once been as I passed. I had long since given up on a happy reunion with the woman I wanted to spend my life with, but the memories still hurt and I had no desire to ever go in that room again. Finally making it into the living room, I slumped down against the wall exact opposite the front door and slowly sank to the floor. I wasn’t going to let them sneak up on me again. I was lucky that it had only been curious children this time, but I knew they would come for me soon. They would probably execute me for killing their princess, and to be honest, I wasn’t as scared as I thought I should be. I craned my neck back and looked at the hole blown in the roof, already regretting scaring innocent children so badly.

I pressed the cold metal of the side of my weapon against my forehead, letting the cool metal sooth my growing headache. I breathed a sigh of relief as the cool metal did its job and let me drain some of the tension from my battered body. I was still incredibly exhausted from my three day long trap building frenzy and my body was letting me know that it didn’t appreciate being forced to run on almost nothing but caffeine. I could feel my eyes sag and I might have fallen asleep right then if it I hadn’t heard the sound of someone stomping up the wooden stairs that led up to my porch.

I snapped my head up, followed quickly by my gun, pointing it at the door I knew would any second spawn four legged soldiers to take me away. That was until I focused on the gait, the distinct, greatly missed sound of two legs coming up to my front door accompanied by a faint humming of a cheerful tune. My heart soared with hope despite the cynical thoughts running through my mind.

“I must be insane, there isn’t anyone else left.”

A silhouette appeared against the pale white curtain that laid over the door’s window, a human silhouette.

I held my breath as the door swung open.

The woman standing in the open doorway was one of the most beautiful things I had ever seen, whether it was from her actual beauty or the fact that I hadn’t seen another human in almost three months I couldn’t tell. She had a long mop of frizzy, red hair that hung about her attractive face like she hadn’t combed it in weeks and, from what I could see, almost reached the small of her back. The eyes that looked back at me were a dull green and accented her hair perfectly. The clothes she wore were surprisingly clean and were a few sizes too big for from what I could tell was a trim, athletic body. I don’t know why, but my mind screamed that this wasn’t a hallucination, this was real, there was an actual human woman standing in my living room.

After the first few days of searching I had given up the rest of the town as dead, as much as that had hurt. I hadn’t dared dream of ever seeing anyone again after that, resigned to my loneliness. But here she was, staring at me with a straight face, and I could only stare wide-eyed in return. Without a word she suddenly darted to my side and wrapped her arms around my shoulders. I slowly, almost delicately returned the embrace, praying that she wasn’t some dream that would fade the moment I touched her. She had buried her face in my shoulder, hiding her face from view and I placed my hand gently on her back as if to comfort her. Suddenly a crushing weight settled on my soul and in my stomach as I realized how big a fool I had been. How long did she have to fend for herself because I had been too lazy and given up? What kind of horrible run-ins did she have with the local wildlife because I wasn’t there to protect her? Were there others I had failed to save and had become dinner for some demonic monster? I was disgusted with myself. I couldn’t tell if she was crying into the heavy blue police uniform I had nicked from the station but there was no mistaking the feeling of my own tears running down my cheeks to leave dark spots on the blue fabric.

There was a sound, the clatter of hooves against wood interrupted my thoughts. I sprang to my feet as quickly as my battered body would allow, the red haired woman rose with me. The front door flew open and a dark blue nightmare waltzed into the room like it owned everything it saw. Its bright cerulean gaze was currently locked on the two of us. It took a moment for me to recognize it as one of the pony-like people, it bore a heavy resemblance to the large white ‘princess’ that I had seen before. She (it looked so much like the ‘sun princess,’ so I figured it was a she) was tall and slender compared to the other ponies and had an ethereal mane, although this one’s looked like something out of a Hubble photo.

The lead X-ray vest helped, apparently. Instead of being rendered into a gasping heap like my first encounter with the Sun Princess it only felt like I had been punched in the stomach. ‘Hooray for progress.’

“Creature, you are under arrest for assaulting the Royal Family and those under their protection!” The blue pony shouted, the armored guards behind her leveled spears. I recognized the two of them flanking Mrs. Yelling. They were two of the three who had tried to capture me in my church, the orange and yellow pony and the blue and white one. Some part of my mind wondered where the Jerk had gone.

I pushed the unidentified woman behind me, hoping my body would spare her the pain of feeling the magic flowing off the equine in front of us. Just as freakish, dark purple plated guards made to move around their dark blue leader I snapped my gun up and pointed it right at the blue pony’s face. She reared back in surprise.

“Go away!” I said, a sudden angry snarl in my voice that surprised even me. I felt a surge of emotion, anger at the pony people for threatening us and fear the woman behind me would be harmed, or worse. I glanced over my shoulder at the girl behind me, her face was still buried in my shirt. Would they do the same things to her that they had done to me, lock her away, make her a science experiment? Would she end up in some alien zoo? I grit my teeth, determined not to let any of that happen.

“I don’t like to hurt people!” I bellowed my sudden fury at the large blue pony. “I hate hurting people, but we won’t be your victims anymore!” I forced my aching back to stop slouching and stood a little taller. I was through running from them, finished with being intimidated, and done backing down. I raised my weapon and shot another hole in the ceiling. White plaster rained down on the blue pony and her guards.

The large one’s eyes flashed a bright white and her horn lit up. I reacted and made to aim for her face but the gun was ripped from my fingers and flung through a window, adding shards of glass to the mess on the floor of my living room. I tensed my weakened body for a fight but, just like before, her horn flashed and I was crushed to the ground and held there. I groaned. “Magic’s cheating...”


Eleison was confused. Why was John on the ground? Why was there magic all over him? Why was he bleeding so much, didn't he need that stuff? She looked up and saw the collected ponies in the room. A spark connected in her mind, John was bleeding on the floor, ponies were here, Luna was doing something with magic. The ponies made John bleed...


The princess of the night looked at the creature on the ground with a superior air. “Nopony hurts my sister!” She growled at the fallen thing.

The other creature had not moved during the whole exchange. Luna looked up at its face to see profound confusion in its eyes. It was staring at the pinned creature called ‘Chris’ and looked as though it was trying to figure out the secrets of the universe. When the creature looked up at her Luna witnessed a strange transformation, after a moment of staring the look in the creature’s eyes went from confused to enraged in an instant. Its eyes held an anger that made Luna feel like a filly meeting the gaze of a monster. Luna, for all of her experiences in the past, had never seen rage like that in anypony’s eyes, not even Discord had been so enraged when her and her sister had interrupted his first carnival of chaos.

The other creature actually growled at her. As the creature growled an angry, high pitched keening sound filled the room, the sound was enough to make Luna’s hair stand on end.

“Guards.” Luna commanded, managing to keep the fear from her voice. The Night Guard moved in, brandishing short, razor sharp spears. They encircled the pair, the enraged one still emitting that furious screech. Luna, as calmly as she could, observed them. The one still standing was interesting, if a bit unsettling. It did not shy away as if it had been burned like the other creature, even now when the other creature was not shielding it. The creature on the ground was armored in a thick fabric and armored plating made of some strange material. It was weakly thrashing around under her magical grip, feebly trying to fight its way out of her spell. Luna briefly wondered if the one still standing could pose any real threat without weapons, as the other now seemed totally helpless.


The Princess of the Night turned to look behind her at the sound of somepony calling her name.

“Sister!? We were not aware that thee had awoken.” Luna said, slipping into her old habits in surprise.

“Luna, you're doing it again.” Celestia smirked making her way to the front of the group and surrounding herself and her sister in the isolation spell, making Luna shiver a bit at the strange sensation. Even though her approach was filled with light hearted jokes Luna could see a certain edge in Celestia’s eyes. She was aware of the entire situation and she was not happy about it at all.

“Ponyfeathers!” Luna cursed. “I don't suppose you’re willing to let it go this one time?” Luna said, deciding to go along with Celestia’s joke. She tacked on a saccharine smile to complete the illusion. Truthfully, she would have much preferred to take in the alien and pursue retribution, but if her sister felt otherwise...

“No, I'm afraid not. No cinnamon buns for a week.” Celestia smiled at her sister’s annoyed frown. “We didn't have you go through all those language lessons just to have you forget them on a whim, after all.”

Annoyed with her sister’s punishment, Luna turned her attention back to the enraged creature and its companion only to see that its face had gone from angry to down right dumbfounded. Luna huffed, Tia was always so good at that, draining all the tension in a room as if it had never existed in the first place, sadly the means by which she did this were so often at her own little sister’s expense.

The gathered Night Guard had a similar expression to Chris’s companion, few really understanding what had just happened. The more experienced members quickly motioned for the rest to stand down and the spears were withdrawn. “Well that was anticlimactic...” Spitfire mumbled earning a few chuckles and snorts from the guardsponies.

“Just who do we have here?” Celestia trotted right up to Eleison, barrier slightly coloring the space between them, and looked over the second member of Chris’s species. ‘No wonder he was so anxious to get back... and to keep us away.’ A small wave of fresh guilt passed over the Celestia’s face and her eyes fell, only to snap open again at the state of Chris, immobile out on the floor with what looked like several bleeding wounds. She had known he was going to be injured, she had followed a blood trail here afterall, but she was surprised by the severity.

“Sister, call for the medics, tell them to come as fast as possible.” Celestia said, a sudden shard of ice in her voice. Luna swallowed nervously. Celestia sounded angry, which was something she had only had the displeasure of witnessing on very rare occasions, only once having it directed at her. Hoping that her sister’s ire wouldn’t be directed in her direction Luna hurried out the door before vanishing in a pop of teleportation.

Celestia turned her attention back to Eleison, taking in the appearance of the red head. She could feel a powerful stink of evil around the second alien, though she remembered a similar sensation surrounding Chris when she first saw him so she tried to not let it bother her. “What is your name?” Celestia asked in as gentle of a voice as she could manage.

The alien looked at her and croaked out “Eleison.” in a voice that, while obviously feminine, sounded like she had been bucked in the throat.

“Well, Eleison, we would like to help your friend Chris heal, can we please?” Celestia cooed as though she was speaking with a foal. The alien stared at her for a second and then sat down behind Chris pulling his head into her lap and holding him possessively and sent her a warning glare. Celestia translated it as As long as you don't try to take him away. Celestia tossed her head at the guards and Fleetfoot stepped forward with a some bandages and proceeded to begin working on the fallen human, stripping the dirty blue jumpsuit away to get at the bleeding lacerations.

Eleison watched the process like a hawk. She was so absorbed in the process that she almost didn't notice when the clatter of many different sets of hooves began bounding up the front steps.

“Princess! Is everything ok?” came the voice of Twilight from the doorway. Celestia turned to beckon her inside, spotting the rest of the elements behind her and three downcast fillies behind them.

“Everything is under control Twilight. Come in, there is someone I would like you to meet.” Twilight and the other elements cautiously stepped into the room, taking in the state of the room, the holes in the ceiling, the guards standing around, and finally the two aliens, one lying there while one of the wonderbolts tried to staunch its bleeding wounds, while the other held onto him possessively.

Twilight stared at the red headed alien and the alien stared back warily. Celestia’s voice broke the stalemate, gaining both of their attentions. “Twilight, this is Eleison, a female of Chris’ species.”

The other elements filed in through the door behind the scene taking place. “You sure Princess? They look tha same ta me.” Applejack quipped moving to the front of the small group. Celestia nodded at her and she trotted up next to the still staring Twilight, thrusting out a hoof at the alien. “Howdy, ah’m Applejack.” Eleison stared at the outstretched hoof warily before slowly grasping it in her hand. “We got a lot ah makin’ up to do with you folks, so ah’d like ta start bah offerin’ ah big welcome to ya from tha Apple family.”

Pinkie Pie chose that moment to appear from over Eleison’s shoulder. “Hi I’m Pinkie Pie and I can't wait to throw you both a welcome to Equestria / we’resosorrywelockedyouupforthreeweeksandchasingyouallovertheplace party!” Eleison looked up at Celestia with a slightly panicked face, hoping for someone to save her from the strange pink pony.

Rainbow Dash offered the female a casual wave of her wing before setting down next to the Captain of the Wonderbolts.

Rarity was visibly holding herself back from rushing over to Eleison with a mane brush.


Fluttershy was smiling at the two aliens, especially at the cute look on Eleison’s face as Pinkie Pie acted like Pinkie Pie. She was about to help Fleetfoot with the bandages when her hoof bumped against something on the ground. She picked up the black picture frame and looked at the photo inside. The first alien in the picture was an obviously smiling Chris, the other was a dark haired female that was wearing some very comfortable looking pink pajamas. ‘Doesn't Rarity have some like that? Maybe I should get some, they look soo comfy...’ Fluttershy looked around at the rest of the photos on the tall, black shelves. Every single one had John or the Dark haired female with a variety of their species, but the overwhelming majority featured the two of them together. Fluttershy wondered where the other female could be hiding. Was it just him and the dark haired one or if the red maned one lived here too? Quietly slipping out of the slightly noisy living room, she peeked through the rooms one by one, hoping not to frighten Chris’ other friend away.

‘The other...aliens in those photos, where could they be hiding? This place is way too big for just two, did they all hide when Chris told them we were coming?’ Fluttershy thought as she looked into a closet in bathroom. ‘Maybe they are like ants and only send out soldiers to fight while the rest hide?’

Fluttershy was fully aware of what had happened with Chris and why he had tried to harm them. The ponies, at least according to her, had harassed the poor thing until he was convinced he had to fight for his life, although why he would come here specifically was a mystery to her, there were plenty of other buildings that looked much more secure than this... cottage? House? The dwelling was so different from all the others Fluttershy had seen that she did not have a proper name for it. The walls and ceiling were so straight and had the strangest covering over them. It looked like they had been painted, but the finish on them was bumpy, like wax had been splattered everywhere and left to dry. And there weren’t any supporting columns either, were the walls strong enough to hold the entire house?

Fluttershy poked her head through the last door she hadn't checked, on the other side was a bedroom. She trotted into the room, noting the little puffs of dust her hooves kicked up as she went. She looked under the bed, in the closet, and even in the drawers but there was no sign of any more aliens, although the dust seemed to have found its way into everything.

Disappointed she looked around the room. ‘Well least we can do is tidy up,’ She thought and trotted back to the bathroom to get a rag. She stopped and looked around the corner at the gaggle of ponies in the living room, noting that Luna had arrived with nearly every medic in the escort. Confident that Chris was in good hands, she returned to the dusty room, damp towel in hoof.

Fluttershy started with the night stand, wiping dust from the table and cleaning off the items mounted on it. First was the coaster, a small piece of white ceramic work. Next came the pictures, both of which showed Chris and the black maned alien together. In this picture the black maned alien was blowing out a group of candles on what looked like a birthday cake with Chris standing over her shoulder, he looked ecstatic. Fluttershy wondered if alien birthday parties were the same as pony birthday parties.

The second picture looked like it was from a fishing trip. Chris was standing on the left holding a bass that was so long that it almost bridged the gap between his elbows. The black maned alien was glaring at him from the right. Judging by the picture, her largest catch for the day was just barely a quarter of the size of Chris’. Her jealous expression made Fluttershy giggle.

Last on the nightstand was an object Fluttershy had not seen before. It looked like a black, rubber half-dome with a glass front, except the rubber refused to bend when she applied pressure to it. Five circular buttons were arrayed over its top, labeled with white letters in the alien’s own language. Unsure of the object’s function, Fluttershy contented herself with wiping the dust from the glass portion of the device before moving on.

From the nightstand, Fluttershy went to the closet. She was astounded at how neat it was. All the clothes were hung up in perfect order, shirts on one rail and pants on another, all of them pressed and wrinkle free. It would have made Twilight jealous.

It made Fluttershy wonder how exactly all those clothes had gotten out onto the streets. Aside from the scarecrows, there had been a great number of clothes just piled here and there around the city, each one consisting of a shirt, pants, and shoes and normally with an undergarment. They’d found the piles everywhere. Stores, houses, even in the machines out on the roads or half-in and half-out of chairs. If all the aliens were as organized as Chris, then why were there things scattered everywhere?

Content that the closet was neat enough without her help, Fluttershy at last made her way to the bed, the last piece of furniture in the room. It was odd, she thought, how only half the bed was covered even though it was easily large enough to fit two aliens of Chris’ size. There were even twin pillows beneath the headboard. The blanket had been folded over on one half, like somepony had climbed out of bed and simply left it there for a very, very long time.

Scrunching her nose some at the dust, Fluttershy decided it would be best to wash the blanket before she did anything else. If she moved it around like this then she would just get the whole bedroom dirty again. Slowly, she took the top of the blanket and began to fold it backwards. She noticed that there was something pink resting on the mattress. She pulled the blanket back further and found she was looking at a set of frilly, pink pajamas.

But how had they gotten here? They looked just like the pajamas the female alien had worn, but they couldn’t have been hers, could they? Surely she would have taken them with her when she had gotten out of bed. And the belt of the robe was still tied, too. Why would anypony just leave a pair of pajamas covered up on a bed?

Fluttershy just looked at the pajamas for a while. There was something odd about them. There wasn’t a reason for them to be here, and there wasn’t a reason for them to be laid out like they were. The arms and legs curled inward nearer to the midsection, just like Chris would do when he slept...

They were posed in the same way Chris was when he slept...

Fluttershy noticed several long strands of long, black hair still clinging to the pillow.

It all clicked. All at once. This was his home. Their home. Only there wasn’t a ‘they’ anymore. And all those clothes on the street, those had been people too, only they had all left and Chris hadn’t left with them. Had he been all alone? All this time?

Tears blurred Fluttershy’s vision and she managed to strangle a sob. It wouldn’t help anything if she worried her friends. She had to calm down. She had to think. Why would he come back here? There were so many places safer than this in the Everfree City. So many places farther from the pony’s base camp. And Chris had had ample time to run, even with his injuries. Why would he go to his home when something like this was waiting for him?

His home...

Fluttershy couldn’t stop a long, mewling cry from finding its way out of her throat. Rainbow Dash was in the room in an instant.

“Fluttershy! What happened?” Rainbow Dash was holding onto her friend now, trying to support Fluttershy as sobs shivered their way up and down her body.

“Dash. It’s horrible,” Fluttershy worked out between sobs. “He thought- he thought we were here to kill him, Dash.” She collapsed against her friend’s shoulder, her words dissolving into more sobs.

“What? Fluttershy, get a hold of yourself,” said Rainbow Dash, not unkindly. “I’m sure he doesn’t think that. I-I bet he just wants to be left alone...” she grasped for something more to sooth her friend’s worries, “What even put that dumb idea in your head?” she asked, again not unkindly.

“W-when an animal knows that it’s going t-to die,” Fluttershy hiccuped out, “they look for the spot that’s the most familiar to them... and then they just wait.” Fluttershy paused to wipe her eyes with a wing. “There were so many other places he could have run to, but he came here. If he had really wanted to get away then he would have just kept running and running until he couldn’t anymore, or he would have left when the children had found him, but he stopped here, at his home. He waited for us to... to...” Fluttershy began to sob into her friend’s shoulder again.

By now, the remainder of the Elements of Harmony had drifted into the bedroom, drawn by Fluttershy’s cries, they had heard enough to understand. Twilight and Rarity wore looks that bordered on horror, Applejack looked ashamed, and Pinkie Pie was close to tears. Rainbow Dash was just staring at them, helpless; she didn’t know what to say.

Pinkie Pie was the first to move. She trotted right up to Fluttershy and wrapped both her up in a hug, right on top of Rainbow Dash’s. “Don’t worry Fluttershy. What Chris thought of us before now doesn’t matter.”

Fluttershy looked Pinkie in the eye. It was all she could do to keep from breaking down again. “Are- are you sure Pinkie? What if...”

Pinkie laid a hoof on Fluttershy’s nose. “It doesn’t matter anymore because we aren’t going to let it matter. Right now Chris is being fixed up by all the best ponies Celestia’s got. He’s going to be just fine.”


“And then we’re going to apologize to him. All of us... except maybe you, I think he likes you.” Pinkie shook her head back and forth and focused. “And then, after we tell him we’re sorry, we’re gunna do everything we can to make it up to him, kay? We’ll show him just how much we actually do care.”

Fluttershy’s tears finally stopped flowing, subsiding into quiet sniffles. “If you say so Pinkie... You’re sure?”

Pinkie Pie gave Fluttershy a beaming grin and nodded. “Mhm! Oh! And we should probably all get moving. I bet the guardsponies have gotten him all fixed up now, we should go so we can apologize as soon as he wakes up!” And with that bounced out the door, supporting a newly cheered Fluttershy with the rest of the Elements of Harmony in tow.


I could hear movement around me as I slowly returned to consciousness. I could feel someone moving me around, an occasional rough push. I heard muttering and felt gauze against my skin. Finally the movements stopped and I cracked my eyes and took in the blurry surroundings, there was one of the blue ponies from my first encounter holding my arm. It took a moment to recognize the sensation of a needle stabbing into my vein as a small vial filled with my blood. When she finished her task the pulled the needle from my arm and quickly trotted away.

I blinked the bleariness from my eyes and found half a dozen pastel faces peering down at me. I groaned pathetically, sounding for all the world like someone had just run over my dog right in front of me. The ponies gasped and backed up, the butter yellow one, Fluttershy, looked a little teary, the other, more serious looking faces began to poke and move my body again in ways I couldn’t really see.

“Princess, he is waking up.” I heard the voice of Twilight coming from somewhere outside of my field of vision. I tried to turn my head and look but I couldn’t move much more than an inch in either direction.

Suddenly my vision was filled with the face of the unidentified woman from before. Her hair fell like a frizzy, red curtain to tickle and irritate my nose. I puffed air out of my nose and tried to blow away the pesky strands but only succeeded in getting a mouthful of the stuff for my trouble. All of this aside, I was so relieved she hadn’t been a dream, that there was more than just me in this place. She shifted her weight as someone else entered my view and I was surprised to learn that my head was cradled in her lap. I blushed in embarrassment only to be distracted by the kind voice that reminded me of my mom.

I looked up, thinking that it was the woman speaking but her mouth wasn’t moving.


“Chris, how are you feeling?”

‘Oh great, it’s Princess Pain.’ I groaned in my mind.

“Whaaat?” I groaned, unintentionally venting my thoughts.

“How are you feeling?” Celestia asked again.

“I feel like crap, thanks for asking, now please go away.” I hissed at her. Hey, it was worth a shot.

“I'm afraid we are not going anywhere.” another voice came from next to Celestia and I cracked my eye to look at the smaller, navy blue pony that had taken a seat next to the larger white and…err rainbow-y pony.

‘Jesus, I’m talking to a rainbow pony princess and what looks like her angsty sister, greeeaaat.’

I didn't really have the energy to be properly angry so I settled for as much of a glare as I could muster, which, coming from the comfy lap of a frizzy red head, probably wasn't very menacing at all.

“I think what my sister Luna means to say, is that we are very sorry for the way we have treated you and we meant no insult by it.” Celestia interjected with a small hip bump and a sidelong glare at her sister.

“Look, I don't know why you keep on with this charade. Its obvious you're here for something and we-” I motioned to myself and the redhead “-aren't necessary for whatever plans you have, so just take what you want and leave us alone.”

Celestia looked stunned but her face quickly returned to her practised, stony expression. “You are partially correct, we are here for more than the two of you.” The other ponies in the room stared at her, startled by her admission. “There is a dangerous substance we believe is abundant here and we need to secure it to prevent disaster.”

“Fine. Take it. I don't care,” I growled out. The sooner they were gone the better.

“But,” Celestia interjected, “We are also here to make peace between our respective peoples. I realize that we have gravely insulted you and we wish to make amends. The time you spent in captivity was only due to the delicate situation our country is currently experiencing. If it were not for that I would have fully supported openly and peacefully approaching you, this entire situation is my doing and every insult against you was on my orders, if anypony deserves your ire it is me. Please let us, let me make it up to you.”

Celestia had so much sincerity in her voice when she spoke I was compelled to listen, but I, with my decades of experience listening to talented actors spout lies of all kinds, lies capable of swaying whole nations, was not impressed.

“Yeah, sure, I forgive you. Now will you go away?” I spat.

You could see the disappointment in Celestia’s eyes from a mile away.

“How dare you!” The venom filled whisper came from the navy blue pony next to Celestia, the one with the night sky in her hair. Luna, I think her name was.

“HOW DARE YOU SPEAK TO MY SISTER LIKE THAT AFTER WHAT YOU DID!” She was suddenly in my face and screaming. My eardrums felt like they would burst and I could swear I felt a breeze. Her sudden closeness and the violence of her presence forced me and the unknown woman to react. She pulled me closer to her and actually hissed. The blue translator in my pocket converting it into a horrific screeching noise that brought back memories of various horror films. I, on the other hand, lashed out with all of my strength, flailing my arms in an attempt to push her away. Needless to say I wasn't very strong at the moment and my mighty blow accomplished nothing but making a tiny ‘smeck’ noise as my gloved hands impacted the side of the night princess’ face.

The woman was far more effective.

She reached out and placed her hand on Luna’s head and with a simple shove sent the blue pony tumbling backwards to crash into the shelves on the opposite side of the room, books, movies, and photos raining down on her.

“P-please don't fight!” Stuttered a small voice from next to us, we both turned simultaneously to see the small butter-yellow and pink pegasus move in between us and an enraged Luna who was picking herself up out of the pile.

Before the navy blue princess could find her way to her feet, her older sister hit her with an almost imperceptible glare. “Luna, control yourself,” She whispered, Luna nodded and looked at her older sister apologetically. Satisfied, Celestia turned back toward the two of us and bowed her head. “I am again truly sorry, if your wish is for us to go and never return, we will take what we have to and not bother you any longer.”

“We never meant to hurt you, I am so sorry.” Fluttershy turned back to us with pleading tear filled eyes. “I’m sorry we didn't realize how alone you are.” Her lip started to tremble and even in my anger I couldn't stay upset with her. “What was her name?” She asked and it took me until she held up a photograph of Rachel and I, the morning after we moved into our new home, to realise that she had figured out what had happened.

I felt my anger dissipate, pushed aside by the almost crushing sadness every time I thought about her.

“Rachel.” I squeaked out my voice suddenly thick.

Fluttershy seemed to deflate slightly like a small bubble of hope she had had been burst. “She is gone?” She asked softly and I nodded very slowly. The other ponies in the room traded glances, the few who knew what it was like to lose someone dear to you shot us sympathetic looks. Fluttershy had wrapped her hooves around the two of us. Suddenly the hug was joined by Pinkie Pie who looked like she was on the verge of tears. Then Applejack, Rarity, Twilight, and even Rainbow Dash joined in. At that moment I saw one of the photos that lay by Luna’s feet. It was the night I had met Rachel at my cousin’s wedding, she looked radiant and I had done an alright job at not looking too goofy.

“And be ye kind one to another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, even as God for Christ's sake hath forgiven you.”

The words echoed through my mind and I realized that this is not the way she would want me to think, cold and callous, unwilling to forgive. It was true that they had hurt me, and chased me, but was it possible that it was all just a terrible misunderstanding?

I sighed and looked up at Celestia.

“I don't understand. I tried to kill you. Why do you want to forgive me?”

“Because it was by my actions that you were allowed to feel threatened enough to kill.” She spoke in that perpetually serene way that spread like a cooling balm over my anger.

I looked down at the floor in deep thought “You said you didn't mean to hurt me right?” I mumbled.

She widened her eyes in surprise for a moment then nodded.

“You promise you wont lock us up again? Or treat us like science experiments?” I asked, even if I was considering forgiving the bulk of what they had done I wanted at least some guarantee that they wouldn’t treat us like criminals or curiosities to be studied.

“I plan to have you live amongst my subjects in the hope that we can continue to learn from one another.” Celestia said, her royal poker face back in place.

“Ok, thats fine. BUT, just to make things perfectly clear, we-” I motioned to the woman and myself, “-are NOT your ‘subjects’. We are both ‘citizens’ of the United States of America and residents of California, just treat us like foreign visitors and everything will be fine.” I said with as much finality as I could muster.

Celestia looked like she wanted to say something but she just nodded.

I slowly got to my feet, Applejack trying to help, but she ended up staring at me as I tiredly drew myself up to my full height.

“Landsakes, yer ah tall one.” Applejack muttered.

Ignoring Applejack, I turned to look at the woman whom I had met today under more than strange circumstances. I didn't even know her name yet and I had thrown myself in front of her to protect her from Luna’s presence. “I’m sorry about earlier,” I said. She took a second to stop glaring holes in an equally angry looking Luna and finally looked back at me. Happiness appeared in her eyes that didn't quite reach her lips. “I haven't even asked for your name yet Miss.....?”

“Eleison.” She croaked. I winced at her voice, she either needed some serious cough drops or something had happened to her throat.

“Eleison, do you want to come with me?” I asked and held out my hand, hoping the odd nature of our introduction and the attack of the pony people didn't freak her out too badly. She had latched onto my hand almost before I had finished holding it out and was shooting glares at any of the pony people who came near us.

Hand in hand with the red haired woman now known as Eleison, I took a few steps toward the door when the photograph i saw earlier drew my attention. I stopped and walked over to it and picked it up, it was the one that my cousin Connor had snapped after his wedding taunting ‘I know whos going down the aisle neeeexxt!’ when he caught Rachel and I having a spirited conversation outside. I basked for a moment in the happy memory, before kissing two of my finger and pressing them to the glass. The ponies in the room stayed quiet and allowed me my moment. I carefully sat the picture back on the shelf where it belonged and turned back to the others in the room. “lets go, I don't want to stay here anymore.” I muttered, the ponies behind me carefully following suit, all of them respectfully silent.

Author’s Note: OH MY GOD!!! That took waaaaaaay too much time, and effort, and nights sitting alone in the Mcdonalds parking lot so I could write. I like what eventually came of it though, now begins John and Eleisons’ adventure in equestria, “How to fit in.”

Anyway I hope you liked it, because there is no way in hell I'm redoing it!

Co-Author’s Note: So, I added about three thousand words to that chapter all on my own. You’re welcome. I’m also never writing about the intricacies of the pony-coffee relationship ever again. Ever.