• Member Since 26th Sep, 2012
  • offline last seen Aug 13th, 2021

Juggalomalice


T

Through luck and foresight King Sombra has managed to avoid the grave, but just barely. At the cost of much of his magical powers and his whole kingdom. With nothing, but his life, to lose he decides to make a daring gambit by infiltrating Ponyville and exacting his revenge from within.

With no formal spy training and little experience socializing with the common pony Sombra find's himself bumbling in his attempt to take over the town. With no base of power and little to his name Sombra finds himself losing the fight before it has started until a cross-eyed pagasus offers too help him. Now, in order to conquer Ponyville he must first conquer the home of Derpy Hooves, which may be his greatest challenge yet.

Cover art provided to me by The Grimm Reaper. Thank you.

(An idea that came from a joke I made on a Facebook thread and I just decided to run with it. This story isn't high on my priority list, but if a few people like it I'll try to make an update for it something within the month. It's labeled comedy, but I'm not a funny person, sorry.)

Chapters (5)
Comments ( 92 )

Genre Tags: Romance
Character Tags: Derpy, King Sombra
i.imgur.com/rN8o2.gif

This should be interesting... :rainbowwild:

I sense the start of something awesome. :rainbowkiss:

hmm amusing idea, excellent writing amusing characterisation... :pinkiehappy: Liked and followed, I want to see where this goes.
hoping it doesn't involve any doctors though :scootangel:

King Sombra? I´m curious to see where the story goes.

:derpytongue2: is such a good pony.

See you later.

Darth Cygnus

Well this my friend... is totally awesome. I love how Sombra has gotten his ego severely bruised and this is certainly the most interesting crack shipping Ive ever scene, keep up the good work and update soon.

This chapter was excellent, very entertaining overall, I liked the take on Dinky and just the general discussions about food, it was highly amusing.
I very much like your amusing and clever take on Derpy and Dinky in this fic oh and obviously Sombra :pinkiehappy:
Didn't care to much for the Doctor reference, but I've never cared for that, so it;s nothing to do with your writing, just me.

“You look like you're about to knock over the Ponyville Bank or steal 40 cakes from Sugar-Cube Corner or something.” She answered without the least bit of fear as she turned her attention to Sombra, ignoring her mother's pleas for her to stop being rude.

“What? JUST WHO THE HELL DO YOU THINK I AM?! I would never steal 40 cakes from anywhere!” Sombra loudly declared.

“See?” Derpy said with a smile as if to prove her point and her judgment of character. “Now let’s all calm down.”

“Why with my power I would steal at least twice as many cakes!” Sombra declared proudly, oblivious to the stares he was receiving. “Afterward I would steal 20, no, 40 gallons of ice cream to go with it. Who ever heard of cake without ice cream anyway?”

“Would you get chocolate?” Dinky suddenly asked, swept up in the idea of free ice cream.

“No way, chocolate is for fillies and metrosexuals. Real stallions can be content with just vanilla and maybe some banana-nut on the side.” He explained.

This... just made my day

Ive been waiting forever for u to update and u do not dissappoint! Great chapter loved it! Update soon!

This is awesome AND cute, update!

:rainbowlaugh: that was awesome, the ending was just hilarious! I can't wait for the next update.

s1

Finally you update! Like to see more.

Sombra had escaped the require rite of suicide that Equestria required of it's male population, but just for today.

Delicious wine. I require another.

Stupid is as stupid does.

Love that reference. I love how Sombra express his interest in oddly, unique way haha

I hope they become a couple. That would be nice.

s1

It make you wonder what kind of kids they will spawn?:unsuresweetie:

“I don't know; must be because of my bubbly personality.”

That Doctor and Assistant reference :rainbowlaugh:

It's refreshing to see Dinky acting in a manner that isn't completely saccharine.

:derpyderp2: Who keeps moving my room?

:rainbowlaugh:

I'm thankful every day that my office doesn't require me to wear a garrote...

I looooooove this story :heart::heart:
pleas for gods sake continue

Worm training.
Fucking awesome. You have my porn good sir.

So ice cream existed...
Makes sense.

Dear sweet Celestia you have buttered my kippers with this story. I enjoy Sombra acting stupid.
"I guess I showed you how stupid I am."

...
Burger. King.
You, sir, have earned my respect.
Huzzah.

"The cypher is stupidity" was, I think, the highlight...

You know what would be funny,
sombra recruiting ponies with derp eyes to be his spies

IMAGINE IT a WHOLE SPY NETWORK of derp eyed ponies :rainbowlaugh: FOR SOMBRA

As he said the cypher is stupidity OR derp eyes

Oh my god this was totally worth it :rainbowlaugh:! Nice job!

The premise reminded me of an Excel Saga for some reason.

“And you're a stone statue!”
Probably the greatest line, closely followed by “No, you're FIRED!”
Or maybe Dinky's demon llama dance?
I dunno. It's all amusing.

Wow, there were almost 40 favorites since last night and comments so quickly. I had over 40 notifications when I signed back on this morning. I've never gotten so many before. I take it everyone likes the latest chapter, thank you. :twilightblush:

3880089 I do apologize about the errors. I try to edit to my best abilities, but I have no proofreader and there are even times where I'm so excited by the work, like in this case, that I'll post with only basic editing. I'll look into getting one to ensure quality.

i need to read this because of that insanely adorable picture

3882202 Same here, is so adorable... agh,the cuteness... its too much!*Starts having a seizure*:rainbowkiss:

This is both a mixture of being so hilarious and adorable. I love it!:heart:

“Never heard of me? But I was the pony of nightmare's. You know, fear and eternal slavery and all that stuff.” He said, almost pleading with the pony across from him to remember his great and evil deeds.

I believe you mean "nightmares"

3884687
lol, with all the errors in the earlier chapters I have to wonder why that was the one error you choose to report. Oh, well. I did some editing on it and a few other chapters, though I'm sure there's still plenty of mistakes.

Aww... I wanted the last word to be 'yet'.:derpytongue2:

Sombra continued to exam her gift and though her actions did perplex the king the implications of giving him a tie sent shivers down his spine. “A society that bestows nooses to their male working force, perhaps in an attempt to instill psychological terror in them and constantly remind them of the ritualistic suicide they must commit should they fail. That would explain the over abundance of females in this town.”

:derpytongue2: made me laugh so hard~

May I suggest that Sombra goes into the grave digging business? I'll bet that they would need help with all the ponies he just fired from their jobs. :pinkiecrazy:

Delighted to see another chapter of this-- It was a most excellent blend of sadistic death and sweet twee! :derpytongue2:

Maybe he can go into headstone-carving.

Quarter Pounder, AC 2980-3002

When foul treason he plotted against his rightful king, abundant jowls a'quiver with ire
The noble king of burgers had it his way; a just sentence of death by fryer and fire

Davenport Pinion, AC 2978-3002

After denying his rightful liege the sleep of the just by severance and hassle
Loyal upholstery was martyred to stop the crimes of this rebellious vassal

Englebert "Crazy Wheels" Wagonwright, AC 2975-3002

'Neither a buyer nor a seller be', reads the placard on the stone stallion's wall
'For the carts are lemons, and the interest rates here make beggars of us all!"

:scootangel:

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