• Published 3rd Dec 2012
  • 3,147 Views, 237 Comments

The Mad Mojavian Adventures of Courier 6 and Pinkie pie - Edmar Fecler

Pinkie Pie and Courier 6 have several crazy, fun adventures in their journey across the Mojave

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It was quiet in the REPCONN headquarters’ lobby. There was a decent layer of dust covering everything except a lone Mr. Gutsy and a trio of dead bandits who had tried to break into the building’s offices. The silence continued for many more moments before the lobby’s front doors were violently kicked open.

In the doorway stood a lone, caucasian figure, clad in a suit of armor with a hoodless cloak which nearly reached the floor, as well as a slightly tattered desperado cowboy hat that rested on the man’s head of brownish-red, shortly cut hair. A set of authority shades blocked the pair of sky-blue eyes that began scanning the lobby. They quickly spotted their target and locked onto the Gutsy robot that hovered in place across the room. As the man began walking to the Gutsy unit, an advanced eye-bot floated into the room behind him.

The man stopped a few feet away from the Mr. Gutsy unit and paused for a moment, looking over the robot to make sure it was his intended target. Without warning, the man whipped out an anti-material rifle with red trimming that had been strapped on his back and pointed towards the robot’s head.

“Listen closely, bot,” the man began in a gruff tone, “I’ve come here for one thing. And you are going to give it to me.” The Handyman hovered in place, un-wavering.

“I want…” the man lowered his weapon. “…A tour of this fine establishment!” he said in a cheerful tone as a smile spread across his face.

Very well sir,” The Mr. Gutsy replied with mock-enthusiasm. “Right this way!


“-And this is the tour’s planetarium, boys and girls!” The Mr. Gutsy tour guide continued with metallic enthusiasm, “It is an exact replica of our amazing universe! -not to scale, of course- Do you see those little rockets floating around?

Jacks took a slurpish sip of his Sunset Sarsaparilla through a straw he had found before looking up at the display of orbs and rockets rotating around a faded yellow ‘sun.’ “Yep, I see them. Hey, they look like the one of the rockets you showed earlier in the tour.”

You are indeed correct, little boy.” Jacks snickered at the robot’s mistake. “Those rockets are in fact the same ones as earlier. Piloted by robots like myself, they are traversing our grand galaxy for new worlds to be mined! And that is the end of our tour, boys and girls. Any questions?” Jacks raised his hand. “Yes, you in the back, do you have a question?

Jacks lowered his hand. “Yea, what if the rockets happen across an alien planet?” for him, he knew for a fact that aliens existed. He had stumbled across a few of them that had set up camp beneath their hovering space ship. Unfortunately for them, they attacked him. Aside from a few quality laser rifles, he found some sort of alien blaster while looting their corpses.

Excellent question young man!” the robot replied. “Each of the robot pilots have a secondary program for just such an occasion. If they do in fact find alien life, they are to bring back a living specimen. That way, we would be able to figure out the best way to rid the planet of all the inferior life to make way for our mining expeditions!

Jacks' sarsaparilla slurping was cut short. “…What now?”

Yes! The owners of ROBB co. know for a fact that you humans are the epitome of all life in the universe!

Jacks rolled his eyes before pushing his authority glasses down to pinch his brow. “…Damn egocentric, pre-war humans…”

The tour guide continued un-phased by the insult to his programmers. “other questions? …No? Well then remember to stop by the gift shop on your way back through the museum. And remember, stay out of restricted areas!” With the robot’s program complete, it began hovering back to its place in the lobby, where it would await the next passerby who wishes a tour of the ancient company’s headquarters.

ED-E beeped impatiently from behind Jacks. “Alright, we can leave now.” He pushed his sunglasses back up his nose as a grin spread across his face. “…But not before a good looting of this place’s gift shop.”


After thoroughly searching the museum’s gift shop, Jacks had not found anything valuable or interesting other than a toy rocket, which he began playing with as he and ED-E left the building.

“Woossshhhhhhhhh! SsshhhhhHHHhhhh!” He swung the toy around, pretending it was flying through space. “Chsh- captain, look out! It’s a meteor storm! Chsh- brace for impact!” he tossed the toy into the clear blue sky before whipping out his .44 magnum revolver and firing a three-shot salvo at the toy as it fell. One of the bullets nailed the toy, causing it to break into several pieces.

“Aaahhhhh! Noooo! The humanity! Pffthahahahaha!” Jacks stopped and leaned forward as he let out a hearty laugh. “Ahhhhh, I should have fun like this more often.”

He noticed ED-E shake his head/body.

“Come on, can’t a guy have some harmless fun?” ED-E suddenly spun around and looked up. “What, are you ignoring me now?! Ok, fine, I won’t play with anymore toys if you’re going to be like that.”

ED-E beeped irritably.

“Wait, huh? What do you mean something is-” A fiery column of smoke shot through the sky about a mile above where he and ED-E were, followed closely by a thunderous wave of noise. “…falling from …the sky…” he managed to finish, despite being stunned from the sight. He watched as the ball of fire and smoke flew into the mountain range around vault 19, followed by an echoed boom.

His jaw hung open as he stood in place for a moment, watching as a pillar of black smoke began to rise from what must have been where the UFO crashed. He looked down to the shattered bits of the toy rocket, then to his pistol. “Damn…”

ED-E beeped inquiringly.

“H-huh?” he said before shaking his head. “Ye- yea, of course we’re going to check that shit out!” The look of surprise melted from his face, replaced by a confident grin and a raised brow. “And so begins our next quest, my friend! Come; let us see what the wasteland has given us this time.”

After an acknowledging set of beeps from ED-E, the duo set off for the unidentified object’s crash site.

Author's Note:

Here's some of Jacks' stats (without going into painfully minute detail). Some folks requested them, and they have a good point, so here you go.
Note: This is including the implants from the Followers and taking "Intense Training" a few times, but not including bonuses from clothing (like his hat) or consumables. These stats are subject to change as the story progresses. I will add updates as the story progresses.

S-8 P-7 E-7 C-7 I-7 A-6 L-6

Barter, Melee, and Unarmed: 50
Energy Weapons and Explosives: 40
Guns: 100
Medicine & repair: 75
Science, Sneak, and Survival: 60

Perks worth mentioning: Wild Wild Wasteland, Strong Back, Toughness (2), Commando & Sniper, Chemist & Chem Resistant, and others.

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