Celestia's morning sun was radiant in her room, casting glares off of John's armor as it did so. John failed to find sleeps sweet embrace that night. Luna's moon was however the most beautiful moon John had ever seen. He held a silent vigil that morning for all of his fallen comrades; Johnson in particular. Sgt. Major Avery Johnson was the closest person John could call a brother. They were through the events at Halo Installation-04, the Invasion of Earth, and even the Battle of Installation-04b. They were through hell and back many times, but it had to end at some point. No one could fight their whole lives and Johnson found his end. On a similar note, John was thinking of Arbiter and why the elites formed another Covenant. John knew Arbiter wasn't in command of the new Covenant, but why would he allow this. Had he allowed this? John would never know this, but it kept him occupied through the eventful past few days.
John was starting to get up from his camping spot trying very hard not to wake any of the ponies. The half-ton armor didn't help in the process. Making sure that his assault rifle was holstered, he finally got to the door and opened it to just what he needed to get out. The door creaked a little making it very awkward for him. When he exited the room fully he slipped the door back into place and walked down the hallway. Trying to avoid the guard was not an easy task either. John was unaware of how well they were trained and if they met his expectations he would need an active camouflage to get through the long corridors of the castle. Making it past the first turn was easy no guards at all, but the next proved difficult. Guards were switching their guard posts and three were making their way to Celestia's bedroom. John silently ran back to the room to find haven with his hosts. This only caused more trouble as some guards came through another door. The reason John didn't use that door was because it was locked, which meant that the guards were the only ones allowed entrance. 'Perfect' he thought as he was jogging to Celestia's room. John whizzed his head around to see if he was being followed and sure enough a Unicorn guard stopped dead in his tracks and gave a commanding order to his lesser troops:
"Halt! By order of Celestia you are under arrest for wandering around the castle's corridors! And going to our majesty's room as well! Guards seize him!" The captain of the group was charging some sort of energy as his horn was glowing a deep magenta color. Sure enough, two bolts of magic made contact with John's armor. His shields didn't even flare.
As this went down, John made no attempt of being quiet. He slammed the door shut and ran to the window. This had obviously woken the ponies up and made them worry about their new 'friend'.
"John, what's wrong?!" asked a disturbed Twilight.
"I guess the guards don't have a liking towards me." John replied.
"Hold on, I can handle this." Celestia retorted. As she finished her gesture the same three guards from earlier came barging through the door, spears and magic at the ready. "Guards hold firm! This creature is not your enemy." Celestia's regal tone had seemed to calm down the guards. To Chief's surprise they were rookies, first day actually.
With everybody calmed down, and the guards back at their posts, the group of mares and the lone wolf were on their way to breakfast. This had been a luxury John hadn't had since basic Spartan training. In fact it had been a few days since he last had something to eat so this was more of a treat than anything. As they entered the dining hall the mere size of the room shocked him. Disregarding that, he took a look at what was on the dining list this morning. Waffles and pancakes were the main course along with other pony related foods. Although he was hungry and dearly wanted to have something delicious, John denied what he wanted. He didn't feel the need to eat just yet and wanted to hold off on all things food related unless he needed to eat. While the others were finishing their meals John asked a question to Celestia: "Is there a chance you would let me back to the ship? I should go check up on its condition."
"Why of course, but you would need to take at least one pony with you. And they can bring a few of their friends with them. Under those conditions may you go back to your, uh- ship." Celestia laid down a set of other rules that John felt was already known such as; "Don't harm another pony." Typical yet needed.
"Fine, I need someone to come-" John was immediately interrupted by Twilight.
"I'll go!"
"Alright you can come." John mentally sighed as he knew why she did so.
"And I want my friends to come with me as well."
"Fine. We leave in ten minutes."
...
As the group exited the castle they were making their way around the back of the castle. Not only was this quicker and more efficient, but it was in the direction of the Pelican anyways. They walked through old abandoned parts of the castle, none gaining interest in anybody. While the castle was very close to their destination the way to it was to rocky for the ponies to keep up with Chief; Chief just asked if he could run ahead to which they said yes, only if Rainbow Dash went with him. He agreed and they ran, and in Rainbow's case flew, to the LZ. At a steady pace of thirty miles an hour the duo made it their in no time at all. Rainbow decided to do tricks while the friends caught up and Chief just did maintenance on all of the guns and other important equipment in the ship. Eventually the others caught up and started to talk. And talk and talk and talk. John never heard so much talk in his life and this aggravated him to the core. He kept his cool however and kept working.
The work was about half done when something caught the attention of mares and the sage green warrior. The loudest roar ever heard by John's ears was just over the hill to their north. Getting ready for anything Chief grabbed a storm rifle and three plasma grenades. And just in case it was something stationary, he grabbed two remote charges. The others were wondering what the items he retrieved were but let him do what he was going to do without question. Getting ready for the fight of his life, John hid behind an oak tree ready for enemy fire.
The creature had marched over the hill in all it's sapphire coated glory. A bear, but not just any bear. A giant bear nearly thirty feet tall. John readied his storm rifle and took aim at the monster's face. The bear saw this and roared again taking his gesture as a threat. John put his finger on the trigger and in a moments notice fired bursts of concentrated plasma into the bears face. This obviously pestered the bear for the animal was swatting the air with its gigantic paws. John could tell the shots were penetrating the large coat and were burning the animal from the inside out. He should know this better than anyone. While the bear was distracted with swinging its paws at the air, John aimed at the eyes. This was not easy because of the weapons effective range. Luck was with John however because he got both eyes with two shots. This caused the bear great pain which caused another roar of defiance from its monstrous jaws. Now that the bear couldn't see John executed his plan: he started running towards the bear, holstering his rifle while doing so. When the bear was within twenty feet he unsheathed his knife and stabbed the bear. The bear didn't feel his knife penetrate the skin, perfect for his plan. He started climbing the bear grabbing a giant handful of fur then using his knife as a sort of ice pick. The mares were watching this and started to think that John was going to die, but little did they know John was on to something.
John was not on top of the bear's head ready to slay the foul beast where it stands. He started to carve out a large enough hole in the bear's head to place a charge in. When the size was ready and fit the charge he placed it in. The bear however felt every agonizing second of the knife carving its own meat out. The bear was desperately trying to shake John off but he had a very good spot on the head. Sensing the danger of the newly enraged bear, John had only one option. He jumped off the bears head and while doing so used his thruster pack to keep his pace and balance. The bear was swatting the air even more violently than before. It had gotten a lucky hit on John sending the Spartan into a nearby boulder, obliterating the boulder to millions of pieces. The mares looked in horror as the bear now sniffed them out, full of revenge. However their spirits were lifted when they saw John walk out of the rubble, holding a little stick device in his right hand. This gained the ponies interest but that interest was short lived. John lifted the little tab and a red button appeared. When John pushed his thumb down on the button, the ponies were horrified.
The charge was set off and the bear's head obliterated into chum. The monster came down with a giant tumbling crash, shaking the earth across a fairly large distance.
"John, What did you do!!!" Fluttershy was now enraged with fear and obvious anger.
"Saved your lives." he replied nonchalantly.
John's victory celebration in his head was stopped when he heard another roar. This one even bigger than the last...
If you did not get the correct information. these covenants are actually out casts who still belive in the great journey. So basiclly these elites are pirates for short. If you played spartan ops it also tells that they still want more info about the forerunners treasures as they say
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I am fully aware of this information. Thank you for looking out for me though. John didn't know that though if Arbiter was an enemy and Mdama was not mentioned in the campaign, as far as I know.
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Or read the book Halo: Glasslands
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That too!
killing the minor pissed off the major... the opiset of shangali culture
A shit storm is going to go down.
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Spartan III:
Less trained than Spartan II and with lesser augmentation and armor.
Trained by a 'repurposed' Spartan II who when he saw the way battalions were slaughtered on missions gave them a combo of drugs that make them so immune to pain that they keep moving until they die from blood loss or extreme trauma. There is more as well but I would suggest reading Halo Ghosts of Onyx.
I can't help but see that your sentences are very....simple. It would just improve the flow of reading a lot more if you could perhaps combine some of those sentences in your paragraph, especially ones that are connecting a small series of actions, together in such a way that it makes the story flow better. Story flow friend, that is what can make or break a good read, and because this story is just at its beginning stages, it can be fixed. But, you should do this before posting any more, otherwise I would just loose interest really quick.
Here is an example:
"John was not on top of the bear's head ready to slay the foul beast where it stands. He started to carve out a large enough hole in the bear's head to place a charge in. When the size was ready and fit the charge he placed it in. The bear however felt every agonizing second of the knife carving its own meat out."
That sounds just pathetic in terms of structure. Now, to rewrite this...
"John, on top of the bear's head, ready to slay the foul beast where it stood, started to carve out a large enough hole through the bear's thick skull to place a charge in. When the size of the gaping, bony, gory hole was big enough, he fit the charge snugly into the oozing bloody flesh of the beast. The bear, however, felt every agonizing second of the knife's cold, cruel steel carving deeply into its rough flesh, leaving small streams of blood flowing from where the terrible wound was carved."
THAT, sounds a lot better. Also, since I am thinking about it, you could do a lot better with descriptive words in your story. It would be a lot more gut wrenching and appealing to actually visualise what you are wanting the audience to see. Don't make them have to guess every detail. Make it flow so that we can go smoothly from one scene to the next, picturing every detail as it happens. Some of the best stories (Yes, I am including clop, too. Don't hate.) are made or broken based on these two elements.
Flow words such as 'where, since, because, so, then, as, though, etc.' are some of the most simple, yet most powerful tools in a writer's arsenal in which to write a captivating and mesmerising story that will leave readers practically BEGGING for you to update. I assure you of that. So, one thing at a time; see if you cannot churn some of these dead pacing paragraphs into something that flows more, instead of the constant stops and starts you have in your story.
The bear is a bear and a bear and also a bear to be as a bear bear bear bear. Lol good chapter. You said bear alot.
i know its outdated but read battle while listening to this
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Yeah I know John didn't know it was called an Ursa Minor, heck Ursa would have been nice to know right!
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You'll know why in the last chapter...
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I know I am not the best writer, and I know all the mistakes in my stories, it's just I don't have time to do that check over with School and family. I also don't have a trustworthy friend who will pre-read the story and let me know of any flaws. It just won't happen. I do however change them after a while and fix any errors people mention. I will get on this sort of thing as the chapters go by. I thank you for your kindness and helpful ways, and take it all into consideration.
1802177 I never said you were a bad writer, but perhaps maybe I could assist? I could help out, as I am a Halo Nut to the core. But, the first story I will do for you is that Didact story, being, well, I AM The Didact. It would be my honor to assist and help elevate the status of the Forerunners as a serious faction in which to write about.
Fucking Ursa Major next... BLOODY GOD DAMN FUCKING HELL!!!!
*reads he deals with it easily* wow..just wow.
Oh john fucked that one up a bit