• Member Since 8th Oct, 2012
  • offline last seen Apr 15th, 2020

Martian


He's just this guy, you know?

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Comments ( 58 )
Hat

Terrible.

If the thing is not stated explicitly by name in the first few paragraphs then it is guaranteed to be not the risqué thing everyone started out thinking. If the twist isn't there the story is predictable and boring, so it's either you know what it is early or it's going to be something really innocent.

And the worst part is you don't know if I'm joking.

1594741
That's why I kept it in the box, :raritywink:

Hat

By the way, I don't mean to be disrespectful. It was still a good story :derpytongue2:

1594829
I could write the Dirty Version if it would ease your tortured heart? :pinkiehappy:

Hat

1594849
You teas—no thanks! :trollestia:
My biting criticism is not driven by sexual frustration.

1594849 It would ease mine :ajbemused:
I enjoyed it but it was a tease

1594856
Oh but I could... and all I would have to do is remove the Spike bit and just keep running with the original. I could probably jump this to 3k worth of Twiplay... :ajsmug:

Anticipation makes things all the more fun.

Hat

1594870
Well actually what you could do is make this an ongoing series delving into Twilight's primal erotic urge to write with the smoothest of quills and her attempts to understand before it tears her friendships apart. And the ironic subplots of the other mane six's fetishes, which they hide while simultaneously empathising with Twilight's fall.
Alternatively, you can just never reveal the item and frustrate everybody!

1594867
:trollestia: - Problem?

1594904
Yeah, that is much too deep for my abilities. I can't register how someone getting off with writing will break apart friendships that have survived no less than four catastrophes at this point, heh. Though musing on this, if I shift gears and turn this into a proper clopfic rather than a for-fun trollfic cloptease, I could probably do one for each of the M6... Hmm. Worth thinking about now.

Oh... this looks... uham. :applejackunsure:
I may look into this, but telling simply by the description, and little knowledge of re-occurring themes in FimFiction, twilight's "order" is a sex toy.
Am I correct? I'll find out soon.

1594929 Nope it was a good tease read just misleading to my relevant interests .

1594936
It is much safer than you'd expect. It just doesn't look like it. :raritywink:

1594941
*Proper clopfic for each of the M6, not additional clopteases. :twilightblush:
I can get away with it once I think, but more will get me lynched.

OH MY GOD
I WAS WRONG! I WAS BEAUTIFULLY WRONG!
You genius. I gift thee with a star.

Brilliant! you know quite some grammar too, I had to look up seamless :derpytongue2:
Sorrily when I read "Ink" I knew it was some writing tool, still very good tho!

Yyyooouuu dirty people! What were you thinking about what was going on? And what made you think what you were thinking was even remotely in-character for Twilight? :trollestia:

I thought the griffon-Gilda connection was a nice touch.

Not sure why it required such an enormous container though. Didn't think griffons had such large anatomy.
I mean, their feathers.
Not their penis.

1598772
Hm.
Guess I hadn't watched her episode in a while. Apparently MLP griffons had wingspans that almost made sense.

1598798
Well, 'almost', yeah. I think she'd actually need wings twice that size to get airborne if you really wanted to push 'reality', but, well.. technicolour pony magic cartoon.

Reality, lol.

1598817
Better than Pegasi at least.
Everyone once in a while I'll watch an episode where Rainbow Dash or Fluttershy is flying around and my brain just shorts out.

1598836
Itty bitty wings are cute. Cuteness overrides physics, apparently.

Shoggoths override physics as well, but I think they're only cute in Japan.

1594866
:twilightsmile:

1598750
BINGO! Exactly what I was aiming at! :yay:

I knew it. Nothing's more vague and enticingly leading then a trolling. A good trolling though.:heart:

Well funny, if a bit predictable.

Also, Rainbow Dash owns a quill? :twilightoops:

Curses! Foiled by your clever misdirect! :derpyderp2:
Though, truth be told, my money was on 'telescope' from the first cylinder reference... :trollestia:

1605860
Ooh, I hadn't even thought of that... though molesting a telescope isn't all as sensual-sounding as it is with a feather. :rainbowwild:

1598860 Meh, screw physics, it's old and dusty. They've got natural magic to walk on clouds, why not natural magic to fly? Afterall when RD was speedng up into a Sonic Rainboom she wasn't even using her wings in the first place. Magic, duh. :pinkiehappy:

As for the fic... I gotta say, yes, I did imagine the most obvious thing anyone would, even though it was obvious you were just trolling. Every fic with vague synopsis as that one does it. Good trolling though, I really couldn't think of anything else both Celestia and RD would have and Twilight would want so much. :rainbowlaugh:

MidNightDancer what did you do to that emoticon of Fluttershy (:fluttershyouch:)
Also Martian very misleading on your part. You really had me goin there.

1606695
I don't always troll, but when I do, I troll people looking to get their clop on. :trollestia:

1607674
:trollestia: - Problem?

1608412 Well I don't clop, I'm quite alright with just reading the ponyfics. But as long as they have an interesting story or twist to them, I don't dismiss them simply for possibly containing some clop along the way too. :scootangel:

1611234
What I like about that post is the subtlety.

1611414

A big event requires an extremely large blog picture - as we'd discussed previously, pictures tend to instantly convey a message with oft a more clear, more legible communication.

GUESS WHAT I WAS COMMUMICATING!?

... I love Molestia. Best princess ever, hooves down.

1611468
i37.photobucket.com/albums/e96/Thanquil/697.gif

As George Takei would say, OH MY...

Though Tyrant Celestia is the one I love most... because I can so easily see it being true.

1611707

You're a bit of a tyrant yourself there, Marty!

Alexstrazza commented on your story!? I thought he was a myth, like Bigfoot or the Loch Ness Monster – or device heretic's humility!

Good times man, good times.

1614152
Even god herself will comment when you troll her fap time.

You are such a troll. I can't stop laughing.

1698998
Kinda leaves one itching for something, doesn't it? :rainbowwild:

1699073
nope, i have no loose ends here :raritywink:

1699144
i'm afraid my explicit adventures alone would only cause a minor paradox in your head so i refrain from commiting homicide over the interwebs :moustache:

Well, I wouldn't mind an actually erotic version of the story.
BUT DON'T CHANGE THE ITEM!

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