Kwisatz-Haderach
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The pillows have been my favorite band for almost 5 years now.
way to go
not a bad fic, i reward your work with two things a 
and a 
1650178
Thanks. It's still a work-in-progress, so some chapters will undergo a little "beefing out", that is to say have extra content added to them and whatnot. Just an FYI...
1650178
It's gone through quite a bit of editing, so you may want to take a second glance.
I can say without doubt that you have improved, I'm loving this one already(And it's totally not my bias for spitdash). I am eagerly awaiting your next chapter! And don't worry about the votes, I'm sure they wont stay that way for long
.
I have to say that Appledash is my favorite ship, so obviously I like Dash with AJ better than Spitfire, but Dashfire is cool too.
I honestly don't know what all the dislikes are about. Maybe because you have AJ trying to break up a relationship that makes her friend happy? Its well written, so I don't think its that. Maybe all the readers were just cranky? I personally never down-vote anything - If I don't like something, I just don't read it, or give constructive criticism or something. My advice is to ignore the down votes, even if it seems difficult and soldier on anyway. Keep up the wonderful writing
I'm not sure if you're just missing some punctuation on that last sentence or if you accidentally cut off part of your chapter. You might want to check that.
1662409
It's still undergoing renovation, I'm afraid... The chapter's going to be much bigger when it's finished, so please stick around.
Sorry for the late news, folks, but the first chapter is finally finished. My sincerest apologies for such sloppiness.
The sexual tension in this chapter is so thick you can...Never mind...
1689995
Thank you very much!
Is there anything specific that you especially like?
Once again your writing is affecting me
Must say this is an extreamly interesting story and im looking forward to the later chapters.
Though i am wondering how you plan to incorporate Applejack into all this
1690685
You'll see. ^^
"My writing is affecting you?" Pardon my French, but what the hell does that mean?!
1690401
Thanks. I really pride myself on that bit.
Really makes you want to climb on into bed with her, reduce her to a squirming, messy heap of moans, screams and cries of bliss and then cuddle up as close as you can to her as the two of you fall fast asleep, no?
1691604 Say, I'm just curious - How would you write a SpitDash fic?
1689534 You can't cut sexual tension. It has too much tensile strength!
Anything that really stands out to you, specifically?
Cuddling, always good.
what is wrong with pinkie pie (kinkie pie)
1700357
She's in heat, that's why.
1700738
Or would it be heaven? 
Screw it I would tap dat..... No I would hit that like a goddamned Freight train. 
Woooo Get some!
Lord have mercy on all of us if she Breaks the Fourth wall while in heat. Im not sure there would ever be an end to that hell.
1703564
Git sum' dat Pinkie action, word!
1703564 What else did you think of that chapter? :3
1705750
It's simple, really: Sugar. Lots and LOTS of sugar. Heck, I'll bet you a hundred bits that she bleeds corn syrup instead of blood when wounded.
1705931
I dunno. Maybe Pinkie's just...random!
1703611
Definately well written flows pretty good and thats all that really matters. I didnt notice any errors but I dont even care if the story is good. I am looking forward to how this story continues and not just for the clop.
1705983
"Still beats that one you had me visit, with her being a Changeling that's part of a eight-mind sub-hive. You remember that, right?"
Wat.
Told you it was on the list for tonight...
That last line...
So, great story so far. Spitfire seems a bit angsty, but if I were in her situation, I would be too. Also, Dash sleeping through the moving thing? Priceless.
1710331
Thank you very much. I'm pretty proud of that moment myself, actually...
Yeah, I can understand Spitfire's pain - that lust for a soulmate...
What other parts did you like? Anything specific? Like any of Spitfire's thoughts, anypony's actions or whatever?
1710606 Hrm... Well, I loved the entire Kinkie Pie thing, cause that blog is hilarious.
And sweet Celestia, I can't believe I forgot to mention Spike. He makes such an awesome character for the short, sarcastic one-liners. That and blunt comments.
One thing for clarification though. So, Dash has stopped repressing emotions altogether? It seemed that way, but I'm not quite sure.dl.dropbox.com/u/31471793/FiMFiction/emoticons/misc_TwilightWut.png
1710770
Her heat's been relieved a little bit, thanks in part to her coming out of the closet, if not to Spitfire.
That, and a healthy dose of Regumate.
What a story so far!
"Over the Rainbow" will be hard to top, but so far, you're doing well.
Pinkie completely surprised me in this chapter. Never knew she could be like that - either way, Soarin' has got his work cut out for him.
Keep up the good work!
Well, damn good.
So far this one seems a bit sexier and a bit less serious than Over the Rainbow but that's not necessarily a bad thing, and I look forward to seeing where it goes.
There were a couple tiny typos I noticed when I was reading it last night but I didn't write them down and so I can't be very helpful but to say that they existed twice or three times... A letter missing or a slight tense issue here of there
I think you've done a wonderful job with the characterization- Rainbow is totally Dashin' and Spit is totally on fire, so good job. The other character's dialogue seemed a bit weak at some points but not out of character (I am thinking of a few Rarity lines I believe). Now I feel like I shoulda taken notes down while I was reading so I could reference specific points... Instead you get vague and general criticism
So anyways, you probably know that you have the technical aspect of the writing down pat- practically no work is needed there.
There was a tent in my pants practically the whole time
Feel bad for taking this long to read something so enjoyable.
I give this story 4.9
's out of 5
1727416
A tent, you say? Heh. Good to know; that means I'm doing my job right!
As for dialogue, I too noticed that it felt a little "watery" and could use some beefing up a bit, you know? Something that sounds more...organic. In keeping in line with the story's FLCL theme, I was thinking of adding more symbolism and some little metaphors here, mainly to represent Rainbow Dash's blossoming sexuality. For some reason, the idea of a hot young filly in her 20's like Rainbow Dash, feeling herself gradually mature from sexual repression and insecurity into sensual freedom and empowerment to be not only extremely heartwarming, but VERY arousing as well. Especially with Spitfire as her lover/teacher.
Any specific moment or touch that you especially liked? For me, as a stallion with a major lustin' for fat mares, I like the idea of Spitfire gradually plumpening up over time like a yellow waterbed. :3 "More cushion for the pushin'" is what I always say. Err, what do you think?
Say, what were your most memorable moments from OTR? For me, it definitely had to be Dash's breakdown. Despite the weird feeling that it somehow didn't have enough feels, I just wanted to be like Spitfire and hold poor Dashie in my hooves, keeping her close and telling her that everything was going to be alright... That, and the look into Soarin's past, where his often childish personality is because he grew up in a very strict household and never felt much freedom as a child. Poor guy.
Any other comments?
1730425
My favorite part of OTR was the marble. It made me laugh throughout many chapters.
In regards to how the plot climaxed, it was something totally new for me to understand. I've heard about that kind of trauma being something that many people have to go through but I've never had to be worried about that kind of thing, so this probably gave me an insight into that experience that I never would have had otherwise. I always had sympathy for those who were ostracized or bullied for sexual identity, but I had never been able to empathize. Perhaps until now, thanks to Rainbow Alberghetti Dash (and you
).
While this isn't one of my own fetishes, I am not revolted at all- although Spitfire certainly had good taste. Spitfire was actually my favorite part of Hybrid Rainbow. Her character was more enjoyable here, I think, than in OTR and I liked how a large portion was from her perspective. Also, the occasional omniscient narrator insert worked well.
I just want to see this one end in some real sexy time- so much has it been alluded to that you'd officially be a cruel person if you did not fill this desire
Keep on hoofin' /)
1731999
Aww, thanks! That makes me feel so great inside... Even though I was never ostracized for my sexual identity (I had no idea I was bisexual until 2010!), I'm a very empathetic person, so I tried to imagine the trauma that Rainbow Dash would suffer from in such an event. Even though she knew that she wasn't the only lesbian in the world, her trauma - combined with the immense concern she has for her image and reputation, created a volatile emotional cocktail for her.
How exactly does Spitfire have good taste, anyway? What do you mean by that, exactly? And how exactly was her character more enjoyable? Was it simply because she was horny or was it because of something else? I HUNGER for feedback...
Also, for a little bit of Fridge Horror (I'm also on the MLP Fridge Horror page on TVtropes
), I'll let you in on a couple potential Bad Ends that make Dash's breakdown so much scarier:
1 - Rainbow Dash was hallucinating an erotic fantasy of hers while she unconsciously threw herself at Spitfire, seeing reality through very different eyes. If Twilight and the others hadn't found the will to run up on stage and snap her out of it, what would've Dash done to Spitfire had they not done sooner, if at all?! Imagine how traumatizing it would be for everypony if Dash had defiled her idol onstage!
2 - What would Rainbow Dash have done had Spitfire not found her sooner? Spitfire had absolutely no point of reference to help her find Rainbow, so her discovery was purely by chance. Because Rainbow Dash just had her greatest fear come to life right in front of nearly everypony, including Luna and Celestia, Spitfire ended up accidentally saving her life. How? Because if Spitz hadn't been there to reassure her, Dash would've been found the next day after having killed herself.
Will it have sexy time at the end? Lemme just paraphrase Jigsaw...
...Oh yes. There will be cum...
Now that you've added a snazzy cover, let the awesome DashFire continue!
1736251
Made it myself, thank you! Whaddya think of the story so far?
Erhmagursh......Sorry, What I meant to say was great chapter! Just one thing...
You just kinda leave this off here, I don't know if that was intentional...
Other wise, great job!
1744487 Oh crap! It was really late at night when I was writing this, so I forgot about that! Hang on, I'll go fix it...
1744487
Fixed! Sorry...
1744730
Much better, make sense now! c:
1744903
Thanks! Any favorite parts or lines in it?
I've just noticed this has a "sad" tag...please don't make it sad!
I don't like sad stories
I can't wait to see where this goes
I love this so much!!!! I can't wait for more.
*yay*
Here we go!
Take your time too. We're just along for the ride, right? 
2324990 Eeyup! Please let me know what you think of it all, please!
Normally i don't go for one character likes her best friend. but that said best friend is in a relationship with someone else so therefore she will make that best friend choose between her and her current lover. why cant Dash have both? it would be a hot threesome.