Departure From the Norm
Dear Princess Celestia,
This is a departure from Emeris’ normal letters to you, as I (Twilight Sparkle) am writing this one. This isn’t actually a formal essay as most of his letters are, but rather, his personal notes on the courtship and social rituals that are currently accepted in Equestria. The insight and attention drawn to things that we ponies normally ignore due to our immersion in the culture were both enlightening and thought provoking to me, and as such, I believed it would be best to share them at least with you, as Emeris has shared his other observations.
While these are not his original notes, I have preserved his exact wording as best I can, my own notes have been added as commentary.
Initial Courtship
If the first mare of the ‘herd’ or unsure of the stallion’s herd status:
1). Mare gives subtle cues/pick up lines/expresses availability/performs what is normally considered a “male display” amongst humans such as flexing, dominance plays, or similar efforts to attract attention. Blatant, overly forward or aggressive mares ask about herd status at this stage, this is a social faux pas.
2). Stallion makes first moves of expressing physical attraction. Bumping hips (Particularly due to the cultural significance of the Cutie Mark), nuzzling, grooming, pressing close, positively commenting on cutie marks or hygiene, holding a long look (Smoldering looks are right out at this stage and considered too forward, males are supposed to be stoic, not horribly overt, and openly smoldering/sultry/ coy looks are not that)
3). This is the socially appropriate point to ask about herd-status
4). Whether consciously or unconsciously noticing the cues, the Mare asks Stallion out. The mare ‘suggests’ places, while the stallion has veto power. The stallion is not expected to present ideas at this stage, but it is not a social faux pas to do so
First Date:
Dates are expected to involve all members of the herd as well as the prospective new member of the herd. Initial dates are expected to be going to restaurants or picnics.
1). The mare dresses up fancily. Less is expected of the stallion. Ideal appearance depends on social status, but emulating the Princesses is almost always a plus. Low to High-Middle class mares tend to dress up considerably with clothing, whereas Nobility tend to add their most expensive and appropriate jewelry. Low to middle class stallions tend to dress up little, whereas high middle class to low-Nobility tend to dress up in extravagant tuxes or equivalents. Mid to high Nobility stallions prefer simple tuxes and moderate jewelry. Despite the relative simplicity of male outfits in comparison to female ones, stallions are expected to take longer to prepare for a date. I have been unable to determine why this is the cultural expectation.
That’s actually a good question, but it’s most likely a remnant of old-style expectations of stallions, where a stallion was expected to get dirtier and thus, take longer to clean up for their mare(s). - TS
2). Upon meeting, the mare is expected to give the stallion a flower the same color as their coat, rising middle class tend to give a piece of jewelery with a gem the same color as their coat. Doing so is considered out of style for ‘true’ upper class, the ‘rustic’ flower being currently in vogue. He totally asked Rarity about this one, no doubt about it - TS
A). Flower goes on the right
B). If the stallion has other mares, their flowers are to be presented on the left. More than two flowers (a rarity) are normally braided into a necklace of sorts with the appropriate colors/flowers
C). A single presented flower when the stallion has a herd indicates the lead mare of the herd and has the implication of wanting to kick a mare out of the herd to replace with the prospective mare
3). Mare is expected to pay on the first date, and to start the conversation as well as do much of the talking. The mare is expected to encourage the stallion into talking and never to talk over him. As a more recent trend, mares are expected to entice the male by being coy and playing a more submissive role. There is also a form of ‘Chivalry’ amongst mares, holding the door open for stallions, pulling their chairs out, etc., derived from the fact that the stallion was expected to go out and beat the crap out of monsters and work in the fields, but the mares were in charge at home and stallions were to be treated as ‘delicate flowers’ because of such. This is an after-the-fact romanticization of the actual social structure of the Equestrian ‘medieval’ times.
A). Pegasi consider it extremely considerate for a non-pegasi date to take them somewhere that provides fish.
B). While a tactile society, a date that would involve considerable amounts of physical contact is considered a faux pas.
C). Excessive emotion from the stallion is considered a turn off. Muted expression of emotions are acceptable.
4). The mare is expected to be dominant overall, but in reality, everyone expects the mare to attend to the stallions every whim during the date. Stallions do not usually put out on the first date. Whether the stallion drops off the mare or vice versa has no social context
The stallion is expected to initiate the kiss. The mare is expected to do the effort of scheduling the next date. Whether the stallion even desires a next date is determinable by the context of the parting kiss
A). A peck on the cheek is generally considered bad
B). A soft kiss on the lips is considered a maybe
C). A low-intensity make-out is a definite yes
D). Extensive contact during the kiss is considered a dominant action and a gesture of ‘you are mine’, this is offputting to some mares who are accustomed to being dominant but most mares enjoy it, this is normally a second date kind of kiss
E). A mid-to-high-intensity makeout with no contact except for the lips is considered a submissive gesture from the stallion, saying ‘I’m not worthy of you but I’m honored’ to the mare
F). If the stallion grabs the mare in some fashion and pulls her over for the kiss, it is considered an excessive display of dominance from the stallion. Most mare’s do not appreciate this, and a mare desiring this (especially on the first date) is the social equivalent of a human man wanting a full-on-dominatrix.
Second Date and Mating
The second date is much like the first, though more conversation from the stallion is expected. The mare is expected to approach the stallion to schedule this date as well. Further dates may be (socially acceptably) scheduled by the stallion. A wider variety of locations and kinds of dates are expected. While herd members may hang out in romantic settings as individual pairs, it's generally not considered a "date" unless all of the members of the herd are there.
1). The stallion is expected to mount the mare on this date if she is the first mare. In a herd, the stallion does not get involved at all, but instead, the lead mare is expected to ‘mount’ the prospective mare and determine how worthy she is. This is a trend that is falling into disuse as stallions’ rights have become more prevalent and accepted, the Stallion is the one to determine if she’s worthy and the dominant mare is not.
2). The first time is expected to be, to put it crudely, all “Unf unf unf!” the first time as the stallion (for lack of better words) uses the mare. The first time is not expected to be good for the mare, but that she should bear with this to keep the stallion. Suggesting going a second time is a faux pas for the mare, but considered to be a very good sign for the relationship if the Stallion asks to. Stallions are only expected to ask for a second time if they are pleased with the mare’s performance.
Crude but... he’s right. - TS
3). Oral sex is considered a no-no, a stallion requesting it from a mare is extremely dominant, and only the most desperate or submissive mare’s will do so. Stallions do not normally give oral to others, it is considered something mare’s do for one another.
4). Lavishing attention on a mare’s teats is acceptable for a stallion, and is the equivalent of oral
5). A stallion pulling at a mare’s mane is considered dominant and is socially disapproved of, however almost every couple/herd does it.
6). In romanticized or past times, the stallion was expected to care exclusively for the mare’s pleasure and only to cum inside when requested. It is a relatively recent trend that males are the dominant actors in sex. It has swung back and forth over the centuries and between cultures
7). In older times, a stallion requesting anal was being submissive, saying that they’re not worthy to sire the mare’s foals. In more recent times, it’s gained the possible insult of the mare not being worthy of the stallions seed. These trends only hold true for the first ~5 - 10 times a pair couples. The distinction between insult and unworthiness is the various other cues the Stallion gives off about their dominance as well as their hesitance in making the request. A more hesitant request is seen as more ‘romantic’ than a more confident one.
Corralary: If the stallion does not ask for anal within the first ~5 - 10 couplings, then it is considered a mild social faux pas to ever ask, as it is a dominant request.
8). Attention to a tribe’s “unique erogenous zones” within the first 5 - 10 couplings is considered a social faux pas. These are considered especially private and reserved for long-term couplings only. These are the horn and surrounding forehead for unicorns, the wings and flight muscles for pegasi.
If the stallion has a herd:
1). It is considered impolite for a mare to try to become part of a herd by confronting the stallion first. Approaching one of the mares (in ye-olden terms, the Lead Mare) and asking for a date is considered the polite way to do so.
2). Stallions at a club or tavern that have a herd are expected to have a member of their herd nearby at all times. However, this does not hold true for a herd of only one mare, in which case the mare is expected to go out amongst the other patrons of the establishment to make herself ‘available’ to be approached away from the stallion to determine eligibility to become a part of the stallions herd.
3). Mare’s generally refer to the herd in terms of the stallion using possessive terms. “Oh, I’m a part of X’s herd”, where X is the stallion of the herd. A mare referring to a stallion in the possessive is archaic and mildly offensive.
4). In herds with more than one stallion, one of the stallions is normally far more dominant than the other(s). Stallions other than the primary or ‘alpha’ stallion are expected to be occasionally mounted by the ‘alpha’ stallion. This is rarely discussed amongst ponies, even otherwise intimate ones.
5). Unofficial pecking order in multi-stallion herds is established by who mounts whom the most, being mounted less indicating higher dominance in the herd dynamic.
Herd Dynamics
1). Stallions are expected to resolve issues between the mares of the herd, primarily by interposing themselves in the conflicts
2). Dominance is a subtle but distinct actor in the relationship. The most ‘dominant’ equates to the one that guides the choices of the herd. This is normally a mare in most cases.
3). Mares are expected to be the breadwinners of the herd, stallions may be the homemaker or workers in heavy labor as socially expected roles.
I don’t know the meaning of the term ‘breadwinner’ and I’m not sure how to ask him, do you know what it means Princess? - TS
4). Stallions are expected to give equal amounts of affection to their mares. As time goes on in a herd, stallions are expected to gradually be more active in their shows of affection, in contrast to the relatively small amount of affection expected by stallions towards the beginning of the formation of the herd.
5). Mare’s are expected to ‘take care’ of their stallion in both the emotional and physical context. However, by contrast, stallions are expected to be the emotional rock of the herd and keep the mares emotionally stable. Stallions are supposed to be the one to calm down and emotionally assist the mares, but not to need such themselves despite the expectation that mare’s are to take care of their stallions. This is likely due to the expectation that mare’s are to pamper their stallions, and that due to this pampering, stallions aren’t expected to have issues or freak-outs.
I honestly never thought of this consciously, but once it’s brought to light it does seem weird that we’d expect mares to take care of stallions, but that a stallion shouldn’t need emotional support... - TS
6). There are two schools of thought on who should move whom’s house to the others in a herd. Old school mares believe that the stallion should either simply move in with the mare or move their house to the lead mare’s. However, more progressive mares or stallions-rights-activists believe that it makes more sense for the mares to all move their houses to the stallions. Most ponies however, do not consider it a major concern.
Further Notes
1). The stallion cooking for the mare is considered an intimate date
2). Reciprocal Nuzzling is considered a sign of returning affection. If the stallion nuzzles underneath the mare’s head, it is a submissive gesture, nuzzling the mare’s neck or cheek is considered affectionate, while nuzzling the top of the mares head/tucking their head to the stallions chest/neck is considered a dominant one (again, some mares like it, but a slight majority don’t)
3). Commenting about horns/wings is considered to be even more socially faux passe than commenting about someone’s flanks. Amongst Earth Ponies (and only amongst earth ponies), is commenting on a ponies stamina considered to be even more intimate. The word stamina being emphasized.
4). A curved horn is normally associated with a mare that only likes other mares, doesn’t like other mares at all, or a stallion that likes stallions, thus the phrase “Bent”. Thicker, longer horns are considered sexy amongst unicorns, especially one’s with appropriate fluting and point.
Twilight’s horn, while thick and reasonably long (a sign of her considerable power) is actually somewhat unkempt (slightly irregular fluting) and not very sexy to other unicorns.
Rarity’s on the other hand is long and somewhat thinner, but immaculately kept, deliberately increasing her attractiveness to those that look for it
5). Wings that are narrower at the base are considered sexy (emulating the Princesses), bigger, better kept wings are generally considered sexier, while tight and defined flight muscles are considered sexy amongst pegasi.
Dash’s wings and wing muscles are considered very sexy amongst pegasi, but she seems very muscular and lacks the appropriate amount of ‘bounce’ for the other two tribes tastes. However, amongst pegasi, Stallions are noticeably more dominant, and Dash’s very dominant attitude and body language has turned off pegasi stallions who expect to be dominant in the bedroom. While her attitude is passable for the other two tribes, her body-type is almost exclusively attractive to pegasi stallions who are turned off by it.
Fluttershy has the appropriate wings, but while she is decently thin to appeal to pegasi, she lacks the hard muscle that Dash has and appears smoother, also having a certain amount of ‘bounce’ to her flank that Dash does not, allowing her to appeal massively to both pegasi and earth ponies and considerably to unicorns as well.
6). Children are fully expected to comment on cutie marks, but adults commenting on them to/around each other is considered somewhat intimate, not necessarily romantic, just intimate
7). Touching horns is an intimate act amongst unicorns. While not necessarily a sexual or romantic one, it is treated as socially taboo as a heavy makeout session in public is. Again, touching horns is not necessarily romantic or sexual at all, merely intimate.
It’s your horn! Of course it’s an intimate gesture to touch it to someone elses horn! What else would it be? I mean, I get it that he’s from a different culture, but that one seems really obvious to me. - TS
8). Preening is an intimate act for pegasi, but this is relatively unknown to the tribes outside of pegasi, much the same way that the sensitivity of the base of a unicorn’s horn is
9). The base of a unicorn’s horn is sensitive when at rest, as it is when magic is going through it. Unicorns, when aroused, begin to channel magic through their horns reflexively, but are unable to cast magic in such a state (to prevent them from frying/zapping any sexual partners)
10). Wing-boners as they’re called, only only sort of exist. When aroused, pegasi automatically fluff and display their wings, and there is a tendency for wings to get stiffer the greater the arousal. The evolutionary reason is hypothesized to be to have the wings of the female stick out at her sides to ensure that the male doesn’t crush them or disrupt them during mating. Resistance while their wings are stiff is pleasurable to pegasi, again hypothesized to be to encourage ‘proper’ mating, as a male atop a pegasus mare would normally hook their forelimbs over the mare’s extended wings as ‘handles’ of sorts. However, the wings can be moved normally in states of arousal, it is more of a plumage display than anything else.
11). The mane at the base of the skull is an erogenous zone for mare’s when aroused, tugging on it is similar to spanking a human while aroused, and something similar applies to a ponies flanks.
12). Cutie marks, in of themselves, are not erogenous zones, however their position on the flank and the cultural significance of them turns them into ones.
13). The tip of the ear is a mild erogenous zone for some ponies, but this varies. In the cases that it is, it’s only the tip and only nibbles, tugging on the ear is outright unpleasant for the majority of ponies. The area behind the base of each ear is a sensitive area, and is culturally reserved for making out
14). In general, mares looking more like the Princesses is considered more attractive, but specifics vary between tribes and are, of course, generalities
A). Bulkier Earth pony mares are considered more attractive, and “pleasantly plump” is a form of ideal body type for Earth pony mares. More “solid” appearing mares are also attractive. Earth ponies tend to favor mid-length hair for mares.Earth pony mares are subtly expected to have slightly larger and more solid hooves. This is as culturally “not discussed” as wing-boners and horn-play are for the other two tribes
B). Small, but tightly muscled pegasi mares are more attractive, shorter manes are preferred for their aerodynamics, mares are expected to be subservient in the bedroom and relationships in general
C). Amongst unicorn mares, a certain amount of ‘bounce’ to the flank is desirable, as are longer manes. Unicorn mares are expected to be more dominant and as such, the aggressive and active member of the relationship. More magical power is considered more attractive amongst unicorns for both genders. More exaggerated fluting is more attractive for mares
15). In general stallions are expected to be more muscular than mares, as well as have more ‘hard lines’ in their form such as square muzzles and defined muscles. Well trimmed fetlocks and visible hooves are also considered attractive for stallions
A). Earth pony stallions are expected to be noticeably larger and bulkier than their female counterparts, and those that are are considered more attractive
B). Pegasi stallions are expected to be nearly equal to, or equal to mare’s in terms of dominance. This is not necessarily an attractive trait, but merely an expected one
C). Unicorn stallions with greater magical reserves are more attractive, actual magical power is not a consideration, merely the reserves of mana, my theory is that this is due to a cultural expectation among unicorns that hasn’t died out, one that the stallions are just breeding studs and that only magical reserves are passed through blood. A more ‘warlike’ horn, a sharper and sturdier horn, are more attractive for unicorn stallions.
This is just horrible! Unicorns aren’t like that! Mares actually care about how magically adept the stallion is, not just how big his magical reserves are! I just... where’d he get this idea?! - TS
16). A herd that's been together for less than a year is still culturally considered 'temporary' in most cases without certain signs of a more permanent herd. But herd members that have been together for more than 8 - 14 months are considered a 'permanent' herd.
A). Horn-rings are a common way to show long-term herd commitment between unicorns
B). Earth ponies consider necklaces with gems the color of the coats of the other herd members to be a sign of a permanent herd
C). Pegasi have begun to take on the Earth pony necklaces as a cultural sign of a permanent herd as the tribes have co-mingled more and such gems have been more available to the normally airborne ponies. But an older way to show the signs of a permanent herd involve the display of herd members semi-imperishable primary feathers.
17). I’ve finally determined why Fluttershy ‘pushes all the right buttons’ for ponies. She has the appropriate wing structure for pegasi and is lithe, has the long flowing mane and tail that unicorn stallions look for, the larger and sturdier hooves earth ponies look for, and she has the near perfect amount of fat distribution to get the ‘bounce’ that unicorns and earth ponies desire. Additionally, while unicorn stallions expect and generally find more dominant mares attractive, pegasi and earth pony stallions find her demure shyness and iron core to be the perfect attractor. She doesn’t ‘play’ demurely submissive, she is that way at all times and frankly, it seems to reduce stallions to puddles of goo around her despite her not noticing this.
Seriously, why doesn't she notice this?
I'll have to second this one, I don't really see how Fluttershy doesn't realize what she does to stallions. I love her, but they fall all over her whenever she actually can muster up the courage to talk to one, why doesn't she realize that? - TS
Transcription and Notes by Your Faithful Student,
Twilight Sparkle
A.N.)- Just to be clear here, this is not in continuity with Consequences of Unoriginality currently, and is from "the future" from the perspective of Chapter 6 (7 if you include the prologue).
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Emeris isn't going to be happy when he finds out that she sent that to the Princesses, those were personal notes
As always, comments are lurved!
1765671
Well, it's already been pretty well established that Twilight doesn't seem to care about Emeris's feelings due to his eeeeeeeeeviiiiiiiiiiiiiil.
Ah, this makes so much sense- including why all the Pegasis Stallions we've seen in the show turned out to be jerks.
World building, yay! And Twi still doesn't get the 'whole other order' thing, does she? Emmy's old species may still be mammals, but that's about it
Ah, you've changed the name.
It's "scientist".
Love the world building, my favorite chapter of this side series has to be the genealogy of ponies. Have to ask though, is some of this world building influenced by Xenophilia?
1766322
Source: The very first line in the description
1765942
She does care, she just isn't thinking everything through, something Twilight does
1765958
Even after having their brains directly linked, it's hard for Twilight to wrap her head around the thought that Emeris is from a world where there's only a single sentient species that has manipulator digits without any form of magic at all. She intellectually understands it, but she doesn't really get it just yet.
1766316
I had that right the first time I changed it, how the hell'd it change...
1766322
).
All of the social (and some of the genetic) worldbuilding is either directly from Xenophillia and its side stories, or built from scratch using those principles. The magic, physics, and genetics is entirely my own work (and thus, probably sucks
1766639
You better not be fishing for compliments, because I found your version of pony genetics to be very workable and fascinating
Ya do good work, boyo
1765671
I see a payback in the future with Twilight diary and a missing pages.
1766713
I'm proud of the initial concept I had for the genetics (Triploid genetics... why not?), but the maths I've done are haphazard at best as shown by Hayquil's additions
1766715
Oh, it'll be even better than that
1766819
Also, now that Emeris mentioned, in the last chapter of the other story. Twilight try to avoid his horn by all means because of that or because of the consequence of doing that during a mind reading? Also, I hope that whatever happen is just temporal, Emeris and Twi, now having a cockel of personalities resulting of the fusion of their brain will be EXTREMELY awkward. Especially to AJ and Dash
1766819
I have not seen Hayquil's work. Would you mind terribly if you gave me a link?
1766853
1766895
See the comments
1766932
D'oh! Whoops- I had forgotten about that comment. somehow. Still, plausible reason for hugely skewed gender ratio, YAY!
I'm a little disappointed that Twilight didn't comment on this...
2821452 I'm surprised as well.
Quick thing, first three examples below.
None of these have punctuation at the end. They seem to be complete and only missing the period but... we as readers can't really be sure of that. Even if the sentence is grammatically complete it is still possible that there is a missing sentence after the missing punctuation.
Wait... was this really needed? I thought Twilight not hating his guts was a pretty clear indicator this was after that... were people really thinking this was set back then? Back when Twilight clearly despised him?
It isn't the size, but how they use it? This sounds familiar. I'm guessing Emeris got his little factoid from other stallions? Or is Twilight's response from a more personal standpoint (a la "not all white people/guys/athiests/Christians/etc. are like that!" statements)?
I find this chapter amusing for what it means for present-day Consequences. Most because Emeris has a curved horn (Bent, lol. How has this not been brought up at some point? Will somepony throw this insult at him eventually?). Although, from a more relationship-drama perspective, Emeris has already got his first dates completed, but I very much doubt he's emotionally ready for the expectations of the second date. Hm... will that contribute to some of the issues coming up with Applejack's doubts and the thing with Quiet Mirror?