• Published 2nd Nov 2012
  • 2,458 Views, 116 Comments

Four Man Cheeseburger Apocalypse - Dihinner



From hell to heaven then back to hell

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Plans In Motion

Most things are easier said than done. The plan Pinkie pie came up with is among them. Unfortunately, it was difficult to find something that could make a loud noise to attract the Tank. But, sometimes what you’re looking for may present it before your very eyes. The rain was steady pouring on Nick and Applejack as they were working on the preparations for the plan. The Princess was out telling all the ponies in the city to stay inside their houses until the threat was eliminated.

“Really? That’s what we’re going to use?” asked Nick as he set up some cords, “you can’t be serious.”

Applejack sighed as she set up a stand, “Well, it’s the only thing we have that can do it. We might as well try.”

“Yeah, well I don’t really want my eardrums blasted off today,” replied Nick, “seriously, not even when we were surrounded by the zombies would we think of doing this. What the hell is your pink friend on?”

Applejack glanced at Nick, “she may be a bit… odd but I’m sure she knows what she’s doing.”

“Yeah, she’s going to get us killed,” muttered Nick, “rigging half the city with amplifiers and then strapping a pipe bomb to the microphone, yeah, there is no way that could back fire horribly.”

Applejack sighed, “Shut up, Nick.”

*************************************************************************************

“This is genius,” said Ellis as he set up another amplifier. Twilight, Rarity, Coach and Pinkie pie were also setting up the amplifiers.

“But, what will you do when that… Tank as you call it attacks us?” asked Rarity.

“Simple,” said Coach as he set up his third amplifier, “we set off the explosives and boom. There goes the Tank.”

“Yes but, what if it doesn’t work?” she asked again.

“then we beat the shit out of what’s left of it,” replied Coach, “besides, I’m sure it will work.”

“Hmm…”

“Don’t worry, there can’t be that much more in the Tank,” said Ellis, “we set it on fire, and usually they go down way faster when their of fire.”

“They?” asked Twilight, “what do you mean them?”

“Tanks. What, did y’all think this was the only Tank we’ve ever seen? Nah, back home there are tons of these things,” replied Ellis.

“So your telling me that where you’re from there are hundreds of Tanks?” asked Twilight sceptically.

Ellis shrugged, “probably, we’ve only seen about thirteen. Not counting this one.”

“Well, if you’ve gotten rid of thirteen, this one will be a piece of cake, right?” asked Pinkie pie.

“I sure hope so,” said Coach, “now, stop talking about food. It’s making me hungry.”

After about an hour of setting up, the two survivors and four ponies left to report on their status. Meanwhile, Rochelle and Fluttershy are on the lookout for Rainbow dash, who still hadn’t returned.

“Are you sure she’s alright?” asked Rochelle.

“Oh yes, um, I’m sure she’s fine,” said Fluttershy.

“Yeah, but the Tank is one big ass zombie.”

“She’s the fastest Pegasus in Equestria,” said Fluttershy, “she can out run the Tank monster.”

“If you say so,” said Rochelle. In her and the others experience with the infected, they know how fast a Tank can be if it chases someone. It’s a good thing Rainbow dash can fly. After about an hour of searching, they found the cyan Pegasus hiding in an alley way, apparently upset that she couldn’t even slow the Tank down. Fluttershy slowly, err, fluttered up to the shivering Pegasus. She noticed a cut on her left foreleg.

“What’s wrong?” she asked quietly. Rainbow dash looked up at her friend. Rochelle, noticing that this would probably be best if left private, left the alley way and waited nearby.

“I couldn’t stop it,” she whispered.

“Well, if it makes you feel any better, they didn’t manage to slow it down much ether,” said Fluttershy.

“They still did more than I did.”

Fluttershy looked Rainbow dash in the eye. “Well, that’s because they’ve seen that monster before and they know how to stop it. I don’t think you had even seen it up close when it attacked us, did you?”

Rainbow dash sighed, “No, no I didn’t.”

“Exactly. You had no idea what that thing was, so, it’s not your fault that you couldn’t slow it down.”

“Yeah, I guess,” said Rainbow dash quietly as she got her self to her hooves. As soon as she did, her leg left foreleg gave way and she crumpled back to the ground. “Ah! I think I broke something…”

“Oh no,” said Fluttershy, concerned, “Do you know what broke?”

Rainbow dash looked at Fluttershy. “I think my leg…”

Fluttershy looked at Rainbow dash’s injured leg. Then she asked, “Can you still fly? I think you need a doctor…”

Rainbow dash then attempted to try to fly off the ground. To hers and Fluttershy’s dismay, she couldn’t manage to get herself off the ground. Rochelle, who assumed their conversation was finished, walked back down the alley way to see what was going on. She saw Rainbow dash trying to get on her broken let in vain.

“Something wrong?” she asked.

“My leg…” said Rainbow dash. Rochelle walked up to her and knelt down to get a closer look at it.

“Hmm… I think it’s broken,” she said as she got up, “here, I’ll carry you until you’re at a hospital.”

“Ok…” said Rainbow dash as Rochelle picked her up and started to search for another hospital.

*************************************************************************

About an hour after they got to the hospital and got Rainbow dash’s leg in a cast, the ponies and survivors all met back at the castle as planned. The rain was now pouring in a similar fashion to the storm in Ducatel. There was a stand with a microphone and an unlit pipe bomb with the explosives disarmed attached to it. Ellis walked up to it.

“Y’all ready?” he asked. They all nodded and Rainbow dash took flight to prepare a sonic rainboom to give off light to attract the Tank along with the beeping of the bomb. The explosives expert Celestia mentioned was casually sitting on the ground drinking some sort of alcohol and had an eye patch for reasons he wouldn’t explain.

“Aye, I’m all set,” he said, putting down his half empty bottle, “just tell me when and I’ll send that Tank o yers back to the fiery pits it came from.”

A brilliant flash of rainbow coloured light exploded above the survivors as Rainbow dash pulled off her sonic rainboom. Ellis activated the pipe bomb while the other survivors stared at the explosion of light.

“Huh, that’s not something you see every day,” said Nick, “now, can we go back inside? My suit was already waterlogged. I don’t need it to be again.” The group then went inside to wait for the Tank as the pipe bomb’s beeping echoed throughout the city. After about ten minutes the ponies started to think the plan was a failure.

“Just wait,” said Coach, “that big mutha can’t be too far off.”

Meanwhile, just above all their heads on the celling, a pair of yellow pinpricks stared curiously at its prey down below. If its situation was not so critically important that it couldn’t be spotted, it might have thought about letting some drool fall onto the ground below to confuse and frighten the prey. Its hood hung loosely off its head as it peered through the large stained glass window. It was the same window it had seen a few days prior, the one with the strange statue on it. It shivered, the Hunter never did like the rain, even though he was currently inside, he will have to leave if the plan was to work properly. Suddenly, the castle started to shake slowly and a low growl was heard through the Hunter’s enhanced hearing.

The Tank was coming.

**********************************************************************************

Twilight blinked in confusion. She had a feeling of dread in the room but didn’t know why. There was literally nothing in here besides her, her friends, the survivors and the explosives expert. It seemed to fit the description that she read about when an animal is being hunted their body has some sort of built in warning signal. The problem was what exactly was in the room other than what she could see? Nothing on the ground, nothing outside and there was anything on the walls. What else was in the room with them? Suddenly, she had the urge to look at the celling. She tilted her head back and gasped at what she saw.
It was two yellow pinpricks of eyes staring right back at her. A row of sharpened teeth smiled savagely as the beast noticed it was seen. Not wanting to panic, she slowly faced the others.

“Uh, there’s something on the celling,” she said, her voice eerily calm, “and I think you should see it.”

“What is it?” asked Nick sarcastically, “a bat?”

Twilight shook her head, “worse.”

“Well, what is it?” asked Ellis annoyed as he looked at the celling to see for himself. What he was not what he was expecting to see, a Hunter flying towards him. “HOLY SHIT!” he cried out as the Hunter started to tear at Ellis chest. Thinking fast, Pinkie pie managed to shove it off before it could do much damage.
The Hunter growled at her and pounced. Pinkie pie screamed louder than the pipe bomb’s beeping as the Hunter started to tear at her. Applejack reacted by kicking the infected’s head clean off. It soared through the air leaving a mangled trail of blood. The room was silent as Celestia entered and saw the torn off head of the Hunter. She turned and was Applejack getting Pinkie pie to her hooves as her friends tried to check if she was badly injured.

“What happened?” she asked.

Nick turned to her, “oh, just a coincidental Hunter attack. Seriously, at least the other times they were outside. Now you’re sending the infected at us inside? Just what exactly are you?”

Celestia stared at the former con man, “I don’t quite understand what you are saying.”

Nick gave an irritated sigh, “first a hunter attacks us as soon as we leave the bakery. Next, a Spitter and a Smoker show up. And after that you send out a Charger, which killed Ellis. Then I find a Tank AND a Witch. What exactly do you not understand? Sure, I admit you had me going for a while when the Spitter attacked your yellow friend,” he said. Fluttershy backed away slightly, “but come on! We have a trap for a Tank and a Hunter is already inside waiting for us? How long were you expecting us to fall for this shit?!”

“Nick…” growled Coach.

“But, now I’ve figured it all out. We are still in Ducatel and you’re just some crazy new infected that’s messing with us!” said Nick. Ellis briefly noticed a black aura or something flicker around him as he was saying this. Something was wrong here. He saw something also black shining outside the window.

It was a weird looking statue, even weirder with dark cracks pulsating off it. He leaned over to Twilight.

“Uh, what’s up with the statue?” asked Ellis. She turned to see it and visibly paled.

“Oh no,” she whispered.

“That’s bad I take it?” he asked.

“It’s Discord,” she whispered as the entire castle shook.

The loud throaty roar of the Tank was heard along with the sound of stone being torn from the ground. There was a deafening crash as the Tank threw the cracked statue through the window, creating more cracks in it. The monstrous infected climbed through the destroyed window and flung Nick, who was closest, across the room.

“Shit,” he muttered as he tried to get the world to stop spinning. When it stopped, he saw complete and utter chaos.

Somehow the pipe bomb had attracted not only the Tank, but a Boomer, Jockey, Smoker and a Witch too. Grabbing his frying pan, Nick ran into the midst of the fight, muttering something about how these ponies are going to get him killed.