The Conversion Bureau: The Last Job

by Da Bunnana King

Chapter One: Waking Up

The Conversion Bureau: The Last Job

By Da Bunnana King
And Cailet and Caleb1197 with the editing

Chapter One: Wakening up
-Around the time Equestria shows up on Earth-
-Somewhere in a secret bunker made by NASA-
===

The old outdated computer flashed back to life. Power coursed through it and the dusty monitor came alight. Displayed were readings taken from a life form that has been asleep for many years. A man in a white coat sat at the desk, grabbing his note book to copy down the information that flashed on the dusty screen before him.

This doctor however was not the middle-aged man whom come to Ulysses in the first place to give him this opportunity. It was the assistant who had helped Dr. Freuenheifer placed Ulysses in Cryogenic stasis. He'd had aged quite well for being close to a hundred years old. He had the rank of Corporal on his shoulders now. But he'd acquired only a few wrinkled, and had a full head of purely white hair, even if it was thinning a bit.

The doctor mumbled to himself as he went through calculations in his head. “… Carry the seven and divide by the amount of nitrogen in his body and then carry the forty-two and… That should do it.” He entered his result into keyboard; the amount of blood to replace nitrogen and the synthetic blood in Ulysses body. But the doctor heard the small pitter-patter of horses’ hooves hitting the concrete floor. He turned around to see what generally unexpected creature was spying on him.

“I thought you weren't going to follow me.” Said the doctor,

“I couldn’t resist. So the stories are true, you really did freeze a person from the past.” Said the high-pitched voice coming out of a small horses mouth. Well to be exact it was a brownish bronze colored earth-pony colt with light brown mane and tail. He also had freckles and large golden yellow eyes. “So may I meet the frozen man please?”

“Yes, but on one condition.”

"Yay. I get to meet the spaceman!! I’m going to ask him what it was like in the past. I wonder if they had seen grass back then. OOOoohhh I’m going to see if he wants to play…” Shouted the young colt before being cut off by the doctor,

“ON the one condition that you stay behind me while we bring him to consciousness. No one knows how he will react when he sees you. You see, back then they didn’t know about you ponies coming from Equestria. In fact the closest thing he's seen to your kind are the terrestrial horses they used to ride back then for ANZAC parades.” Replied the doctor in a smug tone of voice,

“What does turr-es-tial mean?” Asked the pony.

“It means from our Earth. Now stand behind me since he is going to awake soon!”

====

Mostly hissing and ringing is all Ulysses heard, but he also heard muffled voices coming from out side the cylinder he was in. He could still smell the grape in the container and it felt like he could taste it too. The small window on the tube defogged to reveal a small brown, what he could say, pony looking at him with huge gold eyes. Then the face disappeared and the door on the tube seemed to open outwardly in a T pattern. He then exited the pod and took a couple of steps away from it and collapsed.

"Welcome to the future" an unknown voice chuckled.

"What" said the confused soldier,

"78 years into the future." replied the voice,

"So your saying it worked? The whole freezing of the body?"

"Indeed it did other wise we would not be having this conversation."

"And my family? Are they... still alive?" Ulysses was struggling to come to terms, Sure he knew this was exactly what would happen, but his freezing mind was struggling to turn it's gear having never needed to function in over 78 years.

"I don't know" the voice said,

"I'm so damn cold." Ulysses coughed, sending a shiver through his freezing body,

As he struggles to stand the the years of training couldn’t have prepared Lt. Valera for what happened next. The small pony leaped at him from his left side knocking him straight to the ground. The next thing that came at him almost gave him a heart -attack, as if the surprise of a pony jumping at him wasn't enough!

“Hi mister spaceman!! My name is Bronze Lionheart, but everyone calls me Bronze. What’s your name?!” The small pony yelled.

“AHHHH!!!! ROBOT DEMON THING FROM THE FUTURE!!” Screamed Ulysses like a little girl, because he thought of nothing else to do, and with that he was running to the closest exit, which he could find, when a man stuck his arm out and clothed-lined him. He hit the ground hard – knocking himself out when he hit the ground. The last thing he saw was the doctor walking over to him saying something intelligible.

====

“Doctor! I think he’s waking up!” Said a disembodied voice,

“Yes, yes hold on. I'm not young like you are. Now lets see here shall we.” Replied the doctor whose voice was familiar to Ulysses,

“Is he going to be alright Dr. Butcher?” said Bronze,

“He'll be find don’t you worry. I'm sure in his life I'm sure he's dealt with worse.”

Ulysses couldn’t see a thing but he thought that the doctor was dead wrong with his last statement. “Doc, I’m a counter-terrorist sniper. I don’t usually get attacked by a robot horse thing and then clothed-lined by some solider every day,” Ulysses said in a smug tone of voice, now that he'd got a grip on what had happened, “and even if I did, my year ten math’s class would still be the worst thing I have ever experienced in my life!” He sat up to see the faces of those that were talking to him,

In the small room that resembled a sickbay was Doctor Butcher in his white lab coat, the small pony horse hybrid thing and the soldier that had incapacitated him earlier with a first aid kit in hand. The soldier had black hair and pasty white skin, blue eyes and he looked about eighteen.

“Ok, lets see what damage I did to you.” Said the soldier, “Oh, name's Jack by the way. Jack Powell” And with that Jack got to checking out Ulysses head blocking most of he view of the world, except for Bronze.

“Name’s Ulysses Velera, or Lt. Velera.” He said,

“So Jack, what’s with the random talking robot horse in the room?” asked Ulysses,

“Hey!! I’m not a robot horse, as cool as I may look. I am actually an Earth pony. I used to be like you but* me and my dad got converted six mouths ago.”

“Wait. What do you mean by ‘converted?” Ulysses question while Jack was making sure the soldier didn't have any concussion,

“Well one day me and dad went the Conversion Bureau and stayed there for a week learning about how to be a pony and Equestria. Then on the last day went to get converted. I went in and they made me drink this drink, which tasted like grape-juice. Then I fell asleep and woke up as an earth-pony.”

“Bronze, he has been frozen for almost a hundred years now. He doesn’t know about Equestria or the Conversion Bureau.”

Ulysses sat there quietly trying to understand what the young colt said. ‘What were they talking about, Equestria, Conversion Bureaus and strange grape drinks that turn you into a… pony. What next, I can shoot lasers out of my eyes and I can fly.’ Ulysses thought to himself, ‘Hey maybe I could ware a cape and a blue pair of Speedo’s and call my self Frostman or something and go around saving the world from mole people and Martians while I’m at it’

“Ulysses. Earth to Ulysses, come in Ulysses.” Said Jack,

“Wa? Oh, Yes? What is it?” Replied Ulysses,

“We got to be getting back to the bureau before it gets dark, I don’t want to be running into the HLF and having a firefight with them.”

“Ok, so what does it have to do with me?” Questioned Ulysses,

“Well you’re a counter-terrorist soldier right? Well there are some crazy terrorists going around called the Human Liberation Force or HLF, shooting at anything that moves or supports the Conversion Bureau’s. So basically what I'm trying to say is, we got a long walk ahead of us to get back and I don’t want to have to fight in front of Bronze. He is to young to see what we do for a living.”

“Well, yes but I still will need a sidearm to defend myself with and maybe a knife.”

“Doc can you take Bronze with you for the time being Ulysses and I have to pack up what we can so we can leave.”

“Okay, Jack. But please hurry; Chamomile is making some nice tea for when we get back and I don’t want to miss out.” Replied the doctor rubbing his hands together.

====

“So is that everything?” asked Doctor Butcher,

“Yep that’s everything we could salvage from the lab. I still can't believe they had all your old armor and stuff.” Said Jack to Doctor Butcher and Ulysses who was in his black and dark green combat armor,

“Well they said they were going to store my stuff. I’m glad I could get my pistol, knife and an old M98B in storage with ammo to spare.”

“Can we go home now…. Please!!!! I’m missing out on dinner and ill be lucky if I get to make desert!” Whined Bronze.

“Aright lets head out.” Said Butcher in a commanding voice.

With that all three men and one pony left the bunker doors to greet the cold harsh environment that was left of America. The sky was surprisingly clear except for a few smog clouds here and there. But the ground had very little grass on it, it was mainly dirt, even then the grass was dead. Ulysses was staring at a dead world that had obviously had been severely polluted. He wasn’t prepared to see what else has happened to his world, which he called home. In the distance he could barely see an out line of a city, and he could barely recognize it due to all the smog and pollution that seemed to emanate from the city.

“What happened while I was gone?” Said Ulysses quietly to himself.

====

Authors Notes:

Well here it is Chapter One, and so far I’m behind in the plot. But lets hope I can get the whole “Hi I’m a guy from the past waking up in a post apocalyptic world only to be greeted by cute pastel colored ponies.” Out of the way and on to the action and the plot and the cool space alien dragon fight (I wish). But for now lets just take one step at a time to make sure I don’t do something wrong and make sure I do every thing right. And lets not forget Cailet (A.K.A The Great Mother Ginger) who edits these things for me, since I cant be bothered (and maybe for the fact that she has nothing better to do than talk with me on skype and play Minecraft) so once again Cailet, please, please don’t stop editing my stories. And here is her writings one Wattpad, so check her out and another editor who I can flog off my work to, Caleb1197, who wanted to help me write and edit in the first place.

*So tempted to put in then I took an arrow to the knee joke

And thanks to Crushric for the whole new Ulysses waking up part, Thanks

So comment on were I’ve going wrong or right, please. And as always, Bunnana AWWAAYY!!!

-Bunnana King

Comments

[Microshazm]

Well look at that, it's me again. Still not much plot, but it's going straightforward now. I see you've unified the narration, and I think it's working better. There are still some lingering grammar goofs (kick your editors). About the story, Valera's freakout is strange. He's expecting crazy stuff from the future, but a pastel-colored "robot" is too much? And he just runs for the nearest exit? Also, Doctor Butcher.
I'm still looking forward to see where this is going. Otherwise I wouldn't be reading it, would I.

[Da Bunnana King]

111357
Well the editors are being whipped as we speak, Velera... Well I thought it would be funny but oh well (back to the drawing board), and Doctor Butcher wasn't my idea, at first it was a joke but we decided to keep it in for the lolz and the next chapters are going to be a bit dry on plot so I can set stuff up so that things wont seem strange when I drop the plot stuff makes sense, and I may put Chapter 2 up soon after more editing. oh well back to the writing.

[Crushric]

Fanfic issue #1 (No offense) - much like many other issues the story goes by too fast. I now understand that one of the biggest challenges to a fanfic is writing it so it paces along nicely. It almsot seems to go by to fast. I fill a god way to pace it hee would be to elaborate on the Lt.'s coinfusion as he slowly tries to get a grip on reality. Perhaps when he get's out of the cryo statis he falls out and onto his knees caoughing, and then is tackeld by the tiny horse. Or when he's looking for his old gar have him discuss the world of his pas with the soldier. Just something so that it doesn't speed along so fast.

Issue # 2 (No offense) - when you start a new line of dialogue from an ew voice you want it to bwe anthe paragraph. THe way you currently have it dialonguw looks like one huge wall of intimidating text. Don't do this the below Ulysses caugh violently as he fell out of the cryo pod. a choked "where-when?" was all he managed.
"Welcome to the future" an unkown voice chuckled.
"What"
"78 years into the future."

When writing dialogue you want the below

"So your saying it worked?"

"Indeed it did."

"And my family?" Ulysses was struggling to come to terms, Surehe knew this was exactly what would hapen, but his freezing mind was struggling to turn it's gear having never needed to function in over 78 years.

"I don't know" the voice said.

"I'm so damn cold." Ulysses coughed, sending a shiver through his freezing body.

Each line a dialogue should be written as it it being it's own paragraph. Oh, and each new paragrap should begin with a *tab* in order to indent it.

Hope that helps!

[Crushric]

Each new time you change speaker you want a new paragraph to represent this*
(Horrible spelling on my part :P )

[Da Bunnana King]

112338
Wow thanks for the constructive criticism, and I was wondering if I could use what you wrote there, if thats ok with you.

[Crushric]

By all means go ahead, my friend!

[Da Bunnana King]

112338
and I think the reason I'm rushing is because I want to get to the plot because the next coming chapters I want to establish Ulysses standing point on the world being invaded with cute 'n' colorful ponies and him coming to turns with that and how he is going to live in this post-apocalyptic world he has woken up in.
Why did I get the feeling I just spoiled something? Oh well, I guess spoilers, Earth is f***d up the bum due to humans polluting it (go figure)

[Da Bunnana King]

112338
Thanks
*Mashes hands on keyboard*
Yes this will do just fine
Once again thanks .

[Crushric]

Just be sure to correct my egregious typos :P.
Still a story, no matter how good, when rushed can be akward. You'll miss out on chances for exposition at reasonable time. You don't want an entire chapter of exposition where you could have fit it in, in pieces, throughout earlier ones. Good luck.

[Da Bunnana King]

112353
Dont worry about the typos (thats why Cailet exist) and now im glad some one told me other wise there would be a whole chapter of Ulysses going
"Wait, wheres Millner, my parents, friends and Carman Sandiego?"
Stuff like that and the Doctor Butcher for a WHOLE CHAPTER!!! any how, back to writing.
*Mashes hands on keyboards*

[Crushric]

May I be so bold (I fear my commenting may be getting annoyingly frequent) as to reccomend you write your new chapters is something like Microsoft Word (I use Open Office) to ensure you make no mistakes in spelling? Then C&P to your newest chapter for your document. That way Caliet will only have to search for missue of words or illogical sentence construction. IMHO it helps prevent any spelling errors as I am a one man team. It does not, however, remove illogical sentence construction or missue of words (it won't detect issue with ung the word 'pore' when you menat the word 'poor.').
Good night (Day?), and good buck.

[Da Bunnana King]

112373
I do use Microsoft Word its just I'm usually up late writing, Cailet edits a lot of it because of the epic writing that I do up until the early mornings. The grammar I usually pick up on when I reread it to make sure she didn't rewrite it but now and again I do miss out on it.
Just be glad it isn't like this any more. Click if you dare.
Shocking. I know, thank god for extensive editing by Cailet, Caleb and me. Gotta love friends that read to much and write to much (Cailet) and your fellow brony (Caleb)

[Scarves]

“AHHHH!!!! ROBOT DEMON THING FROM THE FUTURE!!” Pure 24 carrot Unedited GOLD! SO FUNNY!