This is a small project where I write short fanfics about couples in the MLP fandom that I believe need some love. It is various stories in one, so get ready.
Chapters (2)
- Member Since 24th Oct, 2012
- offline last seen Oct 10th, 2019
treetoptrooper
Hello, just any random brony doing fanfics here. Note that I prefer background and original ponies over the Mane 6 (I'm so weird that way).
treetoptrooper
Joined 24th Oct, 2012 ·
Offline
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1642380 Undermining.
Digging.
I have no skill.
DUMB COVER PIC IS GONE NOW, GUYS.
man...
YOU NEED TO Contine this man
Eee! I absolutely love such cute, heartwarming one-shots!
This was nice. Your writing needs a little work, but then again, so does mine. Your defiantly good in the "idea" department, though
That was absolutely beautiful.
The thing that bothered me most about this story was the random changes in perspective. Through out the entire story it is third person, but at several points you show Pokey's thoughts in first person. For example, you said "For the first time in a few minutes Pokey realized what he was doing. He was wrapped in the arms of his arch-nemesis as he lightly stroked her mane. What was going on here?
Whatever it is, I'm okay with it."
That final line should read "Whatever it was, he was okay with it." I know I'm being a grammar Nazi but non-parallel tense REALLY bothers. And that happens several times.
But grammar aside, the story was very well written and I liked it over all.
....
I don't like these one shots because it...well:
static.kontraband.com/sites/kontraband/files/images/gallery/teaser_image/2013/05/22/-1.jpg
But still, it was a good, heart lifting read.