• Member Since 4th Mar, 2012
  • offline last seen 1 hour ago

truekry


The one German who is lazy for real.

E

Another day in boring old Ponyville. AJ is out of town, Twilight is busy with her library and so Rainbow Dash is bored to death. As if fortune calls, a well known mare shows up.

This is just a short story about a little adventure of Rainbow Dash and Daring Do.

Chapters (3)
Comments ( 118 )

Definitely adding to my watch list. :pinkiehappy:

This looks promising. You have a few problems with using the right words in the right context, but nothing too bad. :pinkiehappy:

“So, it’s not so dangerous actually?”
It sounds a bit forced. "So, it's not that dangerous?" or something similar would fit better, I think.

Who would risk his live don’t knowing what for?
Should be life

Looking forward to more!

1476262
Thx for pointing that out. Changed it, because it really sounds better.

Oh no, this isn't going to be as heartbreaking as that other fic where Rainbow met Daring but she wasn't an adventurer but a real archaeologist and they didn't get along at all?

If so I don't think I can take the sads.

Your OC avatar looks like Trixie. This pleases Trixie.

Ah, from Germany... *jealousy rising...
JK man but seriously, I would like to go there sometime.

But yeah if you need an editor just ask. :twilightsmile:

but yeah anyway, I like where this story is going so far. Hope you continue it.

This story has met my requirements of excitement and humor. Yet this is not yet sufficient to my needs. so...

smilepanic.com/wp-content/uploads/MOAR8.jpg

future Wonderbold and the element of loyalty.

I'm sure this was just an inocent slip-up

Possible good story. i just thought it was a little too rushed. pace it

1476652
No, that was me sleeping actually. Mistakes can be made :twilightblush:

1476679 None of us are perfect so you are forgiven :yay:

mmmm i like this story, it seems that it has a lot of thing to work on it :pinkiehappy:
only one mistake: Wonderbold .....:rainbowhuh::rainbowhuh::rainbowhuh::rainbowhuh: is Wonderbolt :pinkiehappy:

good job my friend, Greetings from Peru.

Very very nice, I await the next chapter with Joy

This was good fun. I'd like to see more.

>Las Pegasus for his casinos and so on.
Should actually be
>Las Pegasus for its casinos and so on.

And I liked seeing the villains mentioned in it... :derpytongue2:

... I love this. I hope you continue this! I spotted a few errors with word choice, but that's only things picky people will point out!

“My weather duty is done, AJ is up in Manehatten to visit her uncle and aunt and Twilight is re shelving the entire library, again!”

Should include a comma after ' and aunt' and I think you should connect re-shelving with a hyphen. It just looks better to my picky eye. This is still awesome!

1476652
Wonderbolds

....Geddit? :rainbowlaugh:

Will definitely watch this for more.:rainbowkiss:

Interesting.:trixieshiftleft:

Proceed.:trixieshiftright:

Daring Do...
She's not who she seems to be in her books. :moustache:

Fox

Not sure if it's been done before, so this story is of a somewhat original concept to me. +1 follower.

That said, there are countless little errors here and there. If no one else steps up to offer their services as an editor, let me know; I'd be happy to help out, even if I'm not the best of writers.

The party is most impressed, Faving and tracking

Your grammar is a bit botched, but I can excuse that because (at least I assume) your first language is German. So don't sweat it.

Looking forward to more.

Wait what is this? :rainbowderp:

A Rainbow Dash and Daring Doo story that is actually... good? :twilightoops:

...

OH! MY! GOSH! :pinkiegasp:
You just got yourself another watcher for this story. And he enjoys it :moustache:

You need to proof read this, there are a number of mistakes here.

1478596

No need to be, you know, helpful and point them out or anything.:ajbemused:

Who would risk his life don’t knowing what for?

There both mares :ajbemused:

1478615

I believe the term is smart-ass, what you did was more "ass" like. :pinkiehappy:

1478862

They're <---

It would be best as, "Who would risk their life without knowing what for."

1478949 Well at least you didnt moan at me for trying to help some pony

"Who would risk his life don’t knowing what for?" i don't know why but the don't in there looks realy awkward.

That cover art never ceases to amuse me. :rainbowlaugh:

Cool beans! Another Rainbow Dash / Daring Do fic... Fave and Following! :derpytongue2:
Pretty good so far...!

Need Moar :pinkiecrazy:

Gruß aus München :twilightsmile:

1478969 well, the author DID mention this is his first attempt to write something in english. I'll allow some errors as he navigates his way through this mine field we call a language. If he keeps up this level of quality, a misplaced comma or unnecessary word won't bother me one bit. :pinkiehappy:

This story has caught my interest....proceed:trixieshiftright:

Great story, but lots of grammatical errors that might be perfectly fine in German. However, in English, it feels slightly unnatural. Do you have a proofreader?

Und nun, für den deutschen via Google Translate.

Tolle Geschichte, aber viele grammatische Fehler, die möglicherweise völlig in Ordnung in deutscher Sprache. Allerdings in Englisch, es fühlt sich etwas unnatürlich. Haben Sie einen Lektor?

1479440
I can understand English quite well, thank you very much. Writing on the other hoof...
To answer your question, no, I don't have a proofreader. It's not like they're growing on trees.
BTW: Google Translator is horrible. I think your translation made less sense than Pinkie Pie.

If anypony would volunteer I would send him a gdocs links with chapter 2. It's finished on the writing part but
still needs some correction.

1479475

Didn't mean to offend you if I did. dl.dropbox.com/u/31471793/FiMFiction/emoticons/shrug_Twilight_Sparkle.png And I know that GTranslate is horrible at its translations.

Howeve, to make less sense than Pinkie Pie...dl.dropbox.com/u/31471793/FiMFiction/Pinkie_Pie_lolface.png dl.dropbox.com/u/31471793/FiMFiction/emoticons/sillyfilly_Pinkie_Pie.png

I'm not available to do so yet, so if anypony else wanted to step up to the plate, I'd say use them. I won't be available until about the end of the month.

1479532
I didn't mean to sound angry. More sarcastic in relation to the Google Translator.
I can better understand English than his so called German translation.

1479475
This could go many ways, and the way it looks like it's going looks good.
I've never been a proof-reader before, I guess I'll give it a try if you need one.

1479584

I'd also be willing to preread for your stuff. It seems interesting so far, and I wanna what you can make of it!

This is good, you need some editing though, some people get really rustled with some of your mistakes, but you're doing fine by me.

I can already see how this is going to go. I've had the same trouble meeting a few authors who rather enjoy embellishing their stories.

Rainbow must be Really pissed that she's made to look like a wimp :rainbowlaugh:

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