• Member Since 11th Oct, 2011
  • offline last seen 4 hours ago

Pascoite


I'm older than your average brony, but then I've always enjoyed cartoons. I'm an experienced reviewer, EqD pre-reader, and occasional author.

E

Roseluck finds a bone buried in her garden. Nopony can tell her what to do with it.


An entry in the A Thousand Words Contest IV, in the Horror category.

Chapters (1)
Comments ( 16 )
Comment posted by Daybreaker218 deleted July 4th

I've missed your writing. :pinkiesmile:

This was good! The vibes were very strong, and the pacing was excellent particularly given its short length. I don't think I quite understand the ending though. Is the police pony supposed to be death?

12225152
It's pretty open-ended what he is. I see him more as a malevolent spirit, something like a vampire, who gets nourished as his victim gradually fades from everyone's memory, bone by bone. He could be death, but if so, he's a glib and uncaring one.

This is a pretty tightly packed little horror story. Thanks! You got something good here.

Great for a thousand words. I kinda wish you could re-release a longer more fleshed out version. I could use more of this,

damn

12225296
Surely they CAN, although the contest MIGHT have rules about waiting it over, the question is WILL they, right?

Oh, that's good. I love those short story contest, thank you for this one!

There's a lot to unpack there, although I don't think I'll like what I find.

Nice little horror story :)

Something is up with the policepony ...

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When I was reading through it it made me think of stories where reality makes errors or fae like things happen beyond understanding. If the story is like what you say I’m surprised she turned over the skull when she realized who it belonged to. If I was in that position I would’ve kept it just because it was special. If it gains power from her disappearing and she disappearers more the more bones she misses, I imagine she’ll always exist a little if she kept some bones for herself. Reminds me of in full metal alchemist the homucluas instinctually keep a piece of their old bodies around even though those pieces are their one weaknesses that can be used against them and keeping them nearby or even not destroying them is dangerous to them, but they’re naturally compelled to keep them anyways. It makes you wonder what the police guy would do if he needed her bones for his goal but she refused to give any up.

So nice to see another fic where Ponyville is so peaceful they don't even have an officer. Jailbird is a treasure.

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I've played it both ways, though I do prefer it where they aren't necessary. If not for some canon ones appearing in Manehattan, one could think they weren't necessary anywhere, though there are some actual non-monster criminals, like Dr. Caballeron, I suppose, but I like to see those more like traffic cops.

"I found a foot in the garden, Jonathan..."

"Shyte, she knows. She's worked it out. I'm in the box!"

"Would you like some pulderberry crumble?"

"NO!"

"Lovely."

:pinkiecrazy:

The policepony is a DEMON that tricks ponies into digging up their own bones! The more they dig up, the more it DEVOURS THEM!!! Not just their flesh, BUT THEIR VERY existence!!!

As I am from New Jersey, I am quite familiar with such entities... You kill them with pickled rhubarb. And the Himalyan pink salt trick! #TrueInternetFacts :pinkiecrazy:

Little horror was nice to read, some SCP like creature.

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