Chapter 2: Foal Steps
Chapter 2
Foal Steps
Darkness . . .
“Still trapped, still mine, young one!”
“Leave him alone!” a loud voice suddenly echoed, blinding white light filling the pit of blackness that was surrounding me.
I woke up and slowly opened my eyes. I quickly closed them shut, as light passing through the window had almost blinded me. A nightmare . . .
A banging noise came from outside the room.
Those Germans have no soul at all . . . and why does my head hurt so much?
My heart started pumping like mad as memories of the previous night came back to me, in order.
Please be a hotel room, please . . . no . . . please be a tree house. Damn it, make up your mind!
I opened my eyes in anger and realized I was still in that small room in Ponyville’s library. Two huge waves of emotions crashed against each other, deep inside my heart: one of sadness and concern for my old world and one of happiness and excitement of actually being in Equestria.
“So thirsty. That must be good,” I whispered between my dry lips. It felt so weird talking with my new, slightly bigger mouth.
“It’s a muzzle. I’m an . . . animal. Funny, this,” I said a bit louder, testing out my changed voice. It was certainly deeper than the one I had before.
I suddenly remembered I still hadn't seen what I looked like, or my cutie mark for that matter. I tilted my head down but could only see a strand from my dark mane, the rest of my body covered with soft pink sheets.
“Ohh no. Not pink. She knows I’m a boy hors. . . stallion,” I thought, with a bit more manliness coming from that last word. I quickly decided that was the least of my concerns and proceeded to pull the sheets off me so I could actually see myself.
More pain flooded my body as I struggled to move the sheets with my forelegs. I ignored it and continued moving and twitching, from an outside viewer probably looking like a fool. Finally, my front left hoof went over the sheets and with a last effort, pulled them down, uncovering both forelegs and my chest.
“Wow,” I let out, my eyes not believing what they were seeing.
The light filtering through the window cast its rays over my blue fur coat, revealing the splendid colour and details. I brought one hoof closer to my head and studied it with pure amazement, my mouth hanging open during the whole time. Out of the bright sunlight, the color was actually a deep blue.
“Midnight blue,” I thought, vaguely remembering the color’s name, “I like that.”
I was still amazed by the vivid details and shocking reality of my new body when I suddenly remembered the cutie mark Twilight was so curious about.
*** *** ***
Downstairs, the purple unicorn was seeing off an orange mare that came to borrow some books about gardening. She felt a strange excitement combined with concern that morning, having a sick stallion sleeping over. Taking care of somepony else was not a new thing for her, as she had always cared for her dragon, Spike, taking great care of him when he was sick. She felt that he was like a second brother to her, a huge part of her life, since the moment she hatched him.
Twilight went into the kitchen, where Spike was cooking something for the day.
“Smells nice, Spike, what is it?” she asked, smiling at him.
“That would have to be a surprise, Twi,” he responded, grinning back. “You will love it; I’ve been planning on making it since last week!”
Twilight shook her head in amusement. Spike had been getting good at cooking lately. She was always spending the nights reading and studying while during the days she either hung out with her friends or conducted various experiments with magic. Thus, the young dragon started showing quite the interest in making food, starting off as a necessity and turning into a small passion he never admitted.
“Twilight . . .” Spike said slowly, after a pause.
“Yes?”
“Do you . . . have a coltfriend?” he asked, slightly hesitant.
“What?” she jolted, starting to blush. “Why do you say that?”
Her mind quickly went to the pony she had brought in last night.
“Well, I noticed there was someone in the room next to you . . . a stallion,” he said in a playful voice, a mocking smirk forming on his face. "Hope you guys used prote-"
“Eww Spike, no! It's not like that! Look, I’m sorry; I wanted to tell you sooner about that. I’ve been busy all day reading about ancient magic, trying to find out something about a weird symbol,” she said, trailing off.
“Anyway, that pony is . . . well, I don’t know his name yet, but last night, Kazooie’s filly came to our house and said that her father had found a stallion passed out in the middle of his field. She said he was sick and asked for my help, so I had to go and see what was wrong. He could barely move and had a fever so I brought him in.”
“Aww, okay then,” Spike concluded, seeming a bit more relaxed now, despite his teasing facade. “So, can I meet him? Is he well now?”
“Well, I don’t know. I'll have to check on him first to see if he is awake. He seemed so worn out yesterday. I hope his fever calmed.”
In reality, Twilight was quite concerned about the strange pony she had taken into care. She woke up several times during the night to check on him. At first, he seemed to be in a deep, calm sleep, but as soon as the effects of the pills wore off, the colt started to have nightmares, moving and shifting in his sleep. She could only hope that once he woke up, the strange unicorn could tell her what actually happened to him.
Twilight opened the cabinet and levitated two slices of bread and some flowers out.
“I hope he likes daisy sandwiches,” she thought, while preparing one on a plate.
Twilight then poured some apple juice in a glass and levitated the simple breakfast out of the kitchen on a small tray, leaving Spike to his cooking.
*** *** ***
I was still resting, getting used to the sight of my new 'hands', moving and twisting them to see the joint limits. The pain was still intense and soon I had to stop because of it. It would be harder than I thought: I realised I had to do some physical recuperation to get the muscles up and running as they should.
A reminding thought passed through my mind right then.
I raised my head a bit, and with one hoof I pulled the sheets from over my lower body. It was certainly a sight, my brain trying to adjust to what my eyes saw. From what I could tell, I wasn’t bigger than the earth pony that saved me, but it was sure awkward seeing my new form, which looked quite alien. I then thought I would never see my old body ever again and that gave me chills.
As my eyes fell on my rather buff flank, a thought flew through my mind, replacing the previous sad feeling.
“ ’Dat ass . . .” I whispered, even making the lip biting gesture. I chuckled at my silly joke, my neck muscles responding with more pain.
Still, I couldn’t see my cutie mark from that position, so I slowly propped myself up with my forelegs on the pillow, raising my head.
“What the hell is this?”
The symbol that had to be my cutie mark was something I’d never seen before. It was a strange, black drawing of some sort, slightly resembling a Chinese mark but having some round shapes as well. There was nothing I could think of that could even try to match its description. Certainly it had to be from this world, or maybe from . . . another place.
Chills ran down my spine as I remembered that cold void in which I talked with . . . Death. Those dark voices that had been whispering to me also all along returned to my mind but I tried to think about something else. It was just too much; deep inside, I was scared, scared of the unknown, of that light, that superior being. Still, I had to find out what that symbol meant. It was my special talent, after all.
Suddenly the room’s door opened and my whole mind was emptied of those thoughts. A tray levitated in at first, followed by Twilight. She looked a bit . . . different. Last night I couldn’t see her clearly in the barn’s dim lights, but now, with sunlight flooding the room and my eyes rested, I could finally study her traits better.
She looked pretty much the same as she did yesterday but there was something different I couldn’t put my hoof on. Her horn was probably a bit longer than I imagined and her mane was in better shape, probably because last night she was awoken in the middle of the night. Her body also seemed bigger; as my eyes continued to check her out, I noticed her cutie mark. It was the same one as in the show: a large red star surrounded by smaller white ones.
I looked back at her face and noticed she was slightly blushing.
“Stupid me, why did I look at her flank like that. She obviously saw me,” I thought. “Now to say something so I won’t look like a freak.”
“Hey there, how was your sleep?” Twilight asked, smiling.
Too late, dumb ass.
I cleared my voice, thinking about what to say.
“It was . . . good,” I muttered slowly, embarrassment flooding my mind from that stupid answer. “I feel much better now.”
“That’s great to hear!”
She levitated the small tray on the table near the bed, as she slowly approached my bed.
“I brought you some breakfast; you must be hungry,” she said, with that warm smile on her face. “But first, you're probably wondering who I am. I’m so sorry I didn’t have the opportunity to present myself.”
“Here she goes . . .” I thought, holding back a smile.
“My name is Twilight Sparkle, personal student of Princess Celestia and one of the Elements of Harmony. I live here in Ponyville, where I study and take care of the library,” she stated, with a little bit of pride in her voice. And then, silence. She was now looking at me, waiting.
Aww god, she wants me to present myself too now. I can’t tell her my name . . . I don’t think it could be a name here; and what to tell her about myself? ‘Hello, I am Alex, I’m from Eastern Europe but I live and study computer programming in the United Kingdom’. Smooth, dude . . . she will definitely get it. I need a new name, a pony one as well . . . but I'm so bad at coming up with things, especially names.
“I’m . . .” I slowly started, “Midnight.” The color of my fur coat was the first and only thing that came to mind. Twilight blinked a couple of times, surprised.
Aha! “Midnight Blink,” I continued, thinking I nailed it. That had to be a believable pony name and frankly, I liked how it turned out.
“Well, nice to meet you, Midnight Blink,” she said, smiling.
“Please, just call me Blink.”
That sounded so strange, and I would have face hoofed at the whole situation if she wasn’t there.
“Well, Blink, I thought you may be hungry so I made you a daisy sandwich. I hope you like it.”
Awkward . . . a sandwich with flowers. That was going to be interesting.
“Thank you, Twilight. Also thank you for bringing me here; I don’t know what would have happened to me if it wasn’t for you or for that nice earth pony.” My voice was breaking, I was still weak.
“Aww no, don’t mention it. Save your strength and eat, you are still recovering from what happened to you yesterday. We can talk about it later, alright?”
She was right, after thanking her I felt all my energy drain out. Even speaking was a huge effort. I was also so hungry . . .
“I‘m sorry I didn’t bring you more,” Twilight said while levitating the tray on the bed in front of me, “but when I examined you last night, you seemed to have not eaten in a long time. There was practically no food in your stomach, so you will have to start eating slow. I will see if I can prepare something warm for dinner.”
I knew very well why I had no food in my body, but I obviously couldn’t tell her that yet. The smell of the simple breakfast in front of me made my stomach rumble loudly and I quickly blushed, as Twilight let out a smile.
“Are you going to be OK eating that?” she asked me.
“Yeah, think I’ll manage,” I lied, leaning towards the sandwich.
I stopped, realizing I couldn’t grab it properly using just my mouth. I kept opening and closing my jaws as I tilted my head, trying to approach the sandwich from different angles. It wasn’t going to work unless I ate it like a pig.
I then heard a soft, short laughter and the sandwich was suddenly engulfed in magic. It rose above the plate, just high enough so I can take bites of it.
“Here you go, silly,” she said, still giggling.
“Thank you.”
My blush only grew deeper, as I started taking small bites from the floating sandwich in front of me. The whole situation was so embarrassing, as I hadn't been treated like this since I was . . . well, a small child. Twilight noticed my blush and turned away, pretending to search amongst the books from the small shelf. Suddenly her eyes caught a title that she was actually looking for and using her magic she pulled the book from the shelf, all while keeping the sandwich afloat. Turning around, I could barely make the title of that book: Secrets and Mysteries of Dark Magic. She opened it and skimmed a couple of pages as I finished eating the sandwich.
Drinking from the glass should have been an easier job so, before Twilight could notice what I wanted to do, I gently grabbed the glass with my front teeth and raised it so that the sweet apple juice could pour in my mouth. I was surprised that the strange technique actually worked and felt a little better not having Twilight helping me on that one as well. I thought about using my hooves but coordinating them amongst the muscle pain couldn't have possibly given any good results.
Twilight heard me and turned her head away from the book.
“That’s a weird way to drink,” she said, tittering again. “But it’s probably best that you don’t use your magic until you get better anyway.”
I had completely forgotten about that. I was indeed a unicorn and I had . . . magical powers, at least in theory.
“Anyway, could you tell me what happened to you?” she asked, breaking my chain of thoughts.
My heart shrunk and I started to panic a little because of the inevitable confrontation. I thought and rethought my possibilities but I could only see one way out of that situation, something that felt like it could come back at me in the future. But nevertheless, I choose to do it. I choose to lie.
“I . . . don’t remember, Twilight,” I slowly started, “I can’t seem to remember anything before that night, just my name.”
It felt so bad lying to the pony that saved my life, but there was no way she would believe me anyway had I told her the truth.
“I’m sorry to hear that, Blink. You must have been through something awful that night. So, is there nothing at all that you recall before it? Like where you lived, or any kind of names at all, friends, family?”
“I’m afraid not; just my name, the rest are just . . . fragments, can’t really put anything together now.”
“That’s so strange, when I checked you last night you had no signs of broken bones or contusions. Except for the strange condition of your muscles and tissue, everything seemed normal; you should be in perfect health now.”
“My muscles?” I asked, worried that she might have figured something out after all.
“Well, as I said, I don’t have a lot of practical experience with that spell but it all seems very familiar to what a friend of mine had. You see, she’s a pegasus, and one day she overworked herself too much, almost tearing a wing muscle. I checked her with the same spell I used on you and I noticed the injury. She had to stay grounded for five days, and she kinda hates when that happens. And it happens quite often in her particular case,” Twilight explained, remembering how Rainbow Dash whined every day about not being able to fly while in the hospital's recovery room.
“So, before letting her fly, I checked again and noticed the muscle tissue had healed, most of it being replaced with new fibers. That exact thing I noticed yesterday on your muscles. It’s very weird, like you just recovered from a serious accident of some sort. I'm afraid that only magic can do such damage, both physical and at a psychological level. We will have to find the unicorn that did this to you.”
“Damn, she’s smarter than I assumed as well,” I thought, my jaw slightly hanging open from the whole explanation Twilight just gave me.
“Anyway, I guess you can’t remember anything about your cutie mark or your special ability, can you?“ she continued her series of questions.
“No, I really can't. Just saw the cutie mark myself and nothing came to mind. Could you find out what it means for me, please?” I asked, that time truthfully.
“Well, it’s something I for one haven’t seen before either, but I would be glad to search through my books. I do believe it’s a magical mark of some sort which would mean that you are inclined to magic, like me.”
“Thanks, Twilight; I don’t know what I would have done without you,” I confessed, looking into her warming purple eyes.
The mare blushed and returned a smile.
“No worries, I couldn’t leave you like that. You will have to stay here until you get better and I won’t have it any other way.”
The kindness I felt, the one that she'd shown me gave off a strange, warm feeling. A feeling I hadn’t felt in a long time.
“Now, you need rest and-”
“I want to go out,” I interrupted her. “I need to move, get some fresh air.”
“Blink, you know you are still recovering; you can’t go outside in this condition even if I let you,” Twilight protested, somewhat surprised by my random burst.
Before she could do anything, I jumped out of the bed, under the false impression that the sandwich actually made me feel better. Unfortunately, my muscles started screaming with pain as soon as I felt my body’s weight on my hooves. My knees bent and I would have fallen face first onto the floor if it wasn’t for Twilight’s quick reaction. My body felt like it was suspended in air, hooves barely brushing the floor. That strange feeling of floating engulfed me completely, and the purple unicorn floated me back to bed, a frown on her face.
“I told you: you are still weak, so bed time for now, mister,” she said, authority in her voice.
“Wait! Can I at least try to walk? I couldn’t stay in bed ALL day,” I quickly responded.
I felt so weak and vulnerable and had to do something. I had never walked on four legs in my life so excitement evidently was getting the best of me.
“Okay, but just a few steps and then back to bed.”
Twilight then flew me back down. My hooves retouched the floor and I slowly tensed my legs' muscles, getting them ready to support my weight. The pain was not as intense that time around. I raised my front left hoof, and slowly dragged it forward. Instinctively, the back right leg skipped across the floor. I did the same with my right foreleg and before I knew it, I was slowly walking on all fours, soon having reached the end of the small room. It must have looked like a foal taking its first steps, but I was too proud and excited to walk as a pony to even care. The pain grew deeper and my knees started shaking again, and I was soon about to fall again. Magic engulfed me and I let myself fall in the purple cloud, feeling competently exhausted.
I saw Twilight flinch a bit as her horn started glowing harder to keep me afloat.
“Wow, you’re heavier than the ponies I usually lift around,” she said, smiling. “Actually, you’re the first stallion I’ve carried like this.”
She hovered me back to bed and dropped me gently, covering my body with those damn pink sheets.
“Now get some rest and I’ll be back when dinner is ready. And don’t you dare move from that bed,” she ordered, her eyes pinning me down.
“Okay, okay . . .”
The mare then headed towards the door, the small tray and the book she had found flying behind her.
“Twilight, thanks again,” I said to her.
She turned to me and stared into my brown eyes for a moment.
“It’s alright, stop mentioning it already,” she answered, smiling.
Twilight left the room, closing the door with her magic. She let out a small sigh. A strange, alien feeling had started picking at her inner core recently, making her somehow lose track of time and fell strange every time she was in that room. She pondered for a moment all the possibilities and was quick to dismiss a contagious disease of some kind. Twilight shrugged it off, hoping time could tell what that feeling actually was.
*** *** ***
Hours later, a knock at the door woke me up. I started mumbling something about not getting enough sleep with those Germans banging doors all day but I quickly remembered where I was.
The door opened and a strange shape walked in. I quickly shifted in bed, a bit panicked. He then turned on the lights, and after a few seconds of adjusting my eyes, I noticed who it was that came into the room.
Spike, the scaly purple and green dragon was looking at me strangely from across the room, hesitating to walk further in.
“Hey there, S. . . small dragon!” I said, quickly avoiding mentioning his name. “You must be Twilight’s personal assistant, right? She told me about you the night she found me.”
“Oh yeah, that would be me. The name’s Spike,” he said, slightly sticking his chest out in pride. “And you are?” He threw me a suspicious glare, waiting for my answer.
“Well, my name is Midnight Blink, but just call me Blink.”
Spike certainly looked different from what I remembered. He was much taller, had a slightly longer tail and was thinner around the waist. It seemed that he was no longer a baby dragon, but a very young teenager. The details were amazing though: the texture on his scales, his reptile eyes and the now pointy spines on his back and tail made him look so . . . real.
“I really need to find some time references,” I thought. “He sure seems a bit older than how I know him to be.”
“Well, I made dinner and Twilight wanted to bring you some, but I thought you could come downstairs and eat with us. She did tell me that you are too weak to move and yada yada yada, but she always overreacts to things like these. So, are you up for it?”
“That’s nice of you, thanks. Well uhm, yeah I guess I can come.”
I had to do this; I couldn’t let Twilight take care of me like I was a dying pony. I was quite a proud alpha-wannabe guy back on Earth and I didn’t think I should be any different there. As I stumbled down from the bed and began slowly walking towards the door, Spike started to show signs of worrying.
“Wow, dude, what happened to you? You look pretty worn out.”
“I have no idea, Spike. Apparently a unicorn attacked me and I can’t remember anything before that except for my name. That’s what Twilight thinks, at least.”
I continued to walk slowly, following him. When I reached the staircase, I leaned against the wall, catching my breath and resting my muscles for a bit. Spike turned to me with a slightly impatient look on his face. I resumed walking down the stairs, my legs shaking with every step; walking like that was a whole new experience, and the condition I was in only made things worse. I began stumbling but the dragon rushed to catch me.
“Come on, big guy, I’ll help you down,” he said, holding me in balance.
“Thanks dude, you sure are a strong dragon.”
The compliment worked, Spike grinning back at me.
“Yeah, I know, I’m pretty much the 'stallion' of the house here and the only dragon in Ponyville,” he continued, boastfully.
“Hmm, those territorial instincts characteristic to dragons sure seem to show up,” I thought, smiling.
Eventually, with Spike’s help, I reached the end of the staircase and walked into a spacious room, where a small dining table lay in the middle, dinner on it. The tree house sure was bigger than it looked from the outside. The walls were mainly made out of wood, with carved shelves inside them, filled with books. Books. There were a lot of them; everywhere I turned my head I could see books of all shapes, sizes and colors, scrolls and parchments.
“This is Twilight’s dream house, she must feel like she's in heaven here,” I thought, holding in a chuckle.
“Blink, what are you doing here?” a strong voice came from across the room. Twilight was standing in what seemed to be the kitchen’s door, having a frown on her face.
“I told you to stay in bed. You're more stubborn than a certain pegasus I know.”
“It’s OK, Twi, I helped him down, it’s not like he galloped to Canterlot and back,” Spike came to my defense.
“Well now that you are here, I guess you can have dinner with us,” Twilight said, her tone now slightly more relaxed.
We all gathered around the table; Twilight and Spike each took a seat and I quickly climbed onto mine, trying to avoid getting help for that basic task.
“Well, I hope you guys enjoy my newest creation!” Spike said with pride in his voice. “Vegetable soup with fresh croutons, seasoned daisies and a touch of rose petals.”
“Wow, Spike, you've sure outdone yourself this time,” Twilight congratulated him, studying the nice smelling dish.
Steam was coming out of three bowls, one placed in front of each of us.
“It sure looks delicious,” I added, however with mixed feelings in my heart.
The daisy sandwich was sure delicious and I didn’t feel the flower’s taste as being a bad one, but it was still a bit weird having rose petals in what was already an all-vegetable soup.
Twilight and Spike started eating, the unicorn using her magic to manipulate the spoon and Spike doing it the old-fashioned way. He just grabbed the bowl and gobbled up its whole contents in a matter of seconds. It goes without saying that his table manners gained him a very harsh look from Twilight, but my concern at that moment was how I was going to use the spoon. Magic was out of the question and Spike’s method was certainly not an option; that left me only one way: my hooves.
“Here goes nothing . . .” I whispered to myself.
I moved my right front hoof towards the bowl's side and to my surprise, grabbing the spoon between the first wrist was easy. And so I started eating, gently bringing the poorly-grasped spoon from the bowl to my mouth. Every now and then my clumsiness would make me drop the spoon back into the bowl but before I finished the meal I was beginning to get the hang of it. The food tasted delicious, whether because I was extremely hungry or the rose petals and seasoned daisies were actually good. Strangely, it felt like that last one was true.
“Thank you for the meal, Spike, that was quite- delicious. You sure are a great cook!” I said to him from behind a completely empty bowl.
“Don’t mention it. It's nice having someone else around here. We always dine alone,” he stated, throwing a somewhat harsh look at Twilight. “Anyway, I think I’m off to bed. Good night, Twilight! Aww, good night to you too, Blink!”
Spike got up from the table and headed into what was supposed to be his room, closing the door after him.
“That dragon seems like he could be a han-uhh hoofful sometimes,” I said, looking at the purple unicorn that was sitting across the table. “But I guess he means well.”
“He sure does, I’ve been along his side since I hatched him and I feel more and more like a . . . sister to him; sometimes even a mother. We've had our rough patches, but everything turned out alright in the end. I practically consider him my little brother and I don’t know what I would do without him as my assistant.”
She smiled at me, and I smiled back. I knew how much she cared about Spike, but actually seeing the two of them interact in real life made it all so much deeper, bringing a warm feeling to my heart.
"What is it with these damn warm feelings recently? Definitely need to punch something soon," I chuckled at my own silly thoughts.
“Well, I guess it’s bedtime, you need plenty of rest for the next day. Tomorrow you’re going to start exercising and I’ll do another evaluation to see if there is anything else wrong with you,” Twilight broke my chain of thought, using a serious tone.
“Okay, Twilight, thanks again for helping me.”
We got up from the table, and I watched her silently as she floated the cutlery back into the kitchen without even breaking a sweat. We then walked up the stairs, to our rooms. I was still a little shaky, but she was by my side, supporting every time my knees threatened to give in.
“Well, guess that’s good night, I think I will be alright from here. See you in the morning! Good night!”
“Good night, Blink!” she replied, softly.
As I was entering my room, I couldn't miss the fact that she gave me a concerned look, her eyes fixated my cutie mark. She probably still didn't know what it meant and that must have bothered her a lot.
As I gave her a last look, I made it known that she was actually staring at my flank, a grin forming on my face. That made her realize that I might have got the wrong impression. She hastily turned around and headed to her room, a deep blush on her face.
I stifled a laugh at my own shenanigans and entered the room. I went to the bed and lifted myself onto it. With a full stomach and surprisingly comfortable bed, sleep was soon to find me. It had been a full and interesting day and I had a feeling that the next one was going to be even bigger.
*** *** ***
Out into the night, near the quiet fields around Kazooie’s farm, a dark figure descended from the skies, landing right near the place the farm pony had found the mysterious stallion.
Luna looked in all directions and slowly approached the place where he appeared for the first time into that world.
Her horn started glowing and immediately picked up strange magic residue in that area. She then raised her head towards Ponyville, great concern filling her eyes.
With a powerful beat of her wings, the alicorn launched to the skies, quickly heading back to Canterlot. Celestia had to be informed about this.
End of chapter 2
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Enjoy the new chapter ! A bit longer than what I expected it to be, but I guess you won't mind that !
I rushed it a bit to get it to you guys faster so I hope you won't mind some mistakes
Luna is best pony.
Oh right, damn it. THAT was were the story idea I had came from. I mean it wasn't the same, but it was pretty damn similar. Well damn.
MOAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAR!
What was with the switching from 1st P.O.V. to 3rd P.O.V.? Because other than that, Excellent work.
115684 about that, I tried to separate the POV a bit to get more into . . . Twilight's mind so to speak. It's something I felt comfortable doing, and hopefully it got the message though. As I said, I am not a writer at all, and I will try a lot of things to see which is best. sry :(
Hmm. Personally, I think switching the view around from first to third person is a very bad move from you. While I see why you did it, I still think you should've done it differently.
Also, there is a slight formating error up there; when Twi is introducing herself, you cut off mid-sentence by skipping a line, before continuing on as nothing happened. This should, I might redundantly add, be fixed.
Lastly; very obvious shipping there, but subtle enough not to be painful. But still, no me gusta about shipping Mane 6 with humans... but I guess that's a personal opinion, so don't mind me xD
Oh, yeah, and PS; "Midnight" lying about his origins WILL come back and bite him in the ass. I'm totally calling it now.
EDIT: Oh, and since this is the first time I have gotten the chance to do this... (Author comments doesn't count) : FIRST! xD (Sorry xD )
This has the potential to be an awesome fic. It has the sort of refinement in the phrases that means somebody has put time into it. I salute you for a job well done and keep doing what you do!
*phrasing
Very lovely chapter, and I love the name. "Midnight Blink"...it's got that ring to it like almost all pony names and it's kick butt.
...I
you a question.
MMMMMMMMMMMMMMOOOOOOOOOOAAAAAAAAAAAAARRRRRRR!!!!!!!????? 
WHY IS THERE NOT
I'm sorry, was I too loud?
I'm sorry.
I promise I'll be quieter next time, please don't be angry with me.
Great work! I did pick up on a few spelling and word ordering mistakes, but nothing that bothered me. Can't wait for the next chapter
115790 thanks for reading ! most of them were corrected after posting the chapter :) If there are still any left, please tell me
A few quick corrections:
“I‘m sorry I didn’t brought [should be "bring"] you more,” Twilight said while levitating the tray on the bed, in front of me, “but when I examined you last night, you seemed to have not eaten in a long time. There was practically no food in your organism [should be "stomach", got a lol from me on this one], so you will have to start eating slow. I will see if I can prepare something warm for dinner.”
...
“Wow, you’re heavier that [should be "than"] the ponies I usually lift around,” she said, smiling. “Actually, you’re the first stallion I’ve carried like this.”
...
“I have no idea, Spike; [end the sentence here, and start a new one with "apparently"] apparently a unicorn attacked me and I can’t remember anything before that except for my name. That’s what Twilight thinks, at least.” (got to love the rules for using the semi-colon... I've been abusing the English language for twenty years and still can't get it right, lol)
Note, these are just a few mistakes that really stuck out to me. I'd focus some attention to finding a prereader. Ask around, and you'll find someone willing to help. This place is a lot nicer to writers than a few sites that I've been to.
Overall, it's a good chapter. It could use a little more polish in terms of spelling/grammar, but the plot and character development are able to save it.
115838 Thanks for pointing out the mistakes ! Most of them were to be corrected on the next edit, but I would have definitely skipped the organism one.
I do have a couple of pre-readers but I've chosen to post it today to get the chapter out. Starting next time, I will send it to the pre-readers first
I for one, liked it. I'll go over it in technical details later, but story-wise, it's a solid chapter.
OK, I'm sorry, but the switches between 1st and 3rd person perspectives are really taking me out of the story.
Please, please stick with one perspective, or make the transitions between them more coherent.
the whole 3rd person POV and 1st person POV didn't bother me any. Really loving this fic, keep up the awesome work.
Sweet chapter! I'm loving this! More please!
I'd love to see the other mane six's reaction to you checking out their "cutie marks"
116815 " 'Dat Flank "
Spoiler:
here's the lip biting reference for chapter 2.
i2.kym-cdn.com/entries/icons/original/000/000/228/dat.jpg
He's in for it.
He's pretty much scewed when Luna finds him. Because if they send one of the princesses to investigate, then it's got to be some serious shit.
After reading I believe Death is either one of the following : The one and only grim reaper that sends souls to their places [ prolly this ] or is Death one of the four horse-men of the Apocalypse . Anywhore I don't think Luna shouldn't be messing with Death that would be like :'' think how would you feel if a bacteria sat at your table and started to get snarky '' .
Hope you get the reference its also a hint to where I got my name 
*Sigh*
Yeah, why the hell did he have to lie about what happened? At worst you sound nuts but your ability to know certain things would prove your claims. At best you get things sorted out and go on your merry way, after a year or two everypony forgets and you are just another (Well if it weren't for Luna coming). I'm sorry but that plot device just irks me every time I see it (And it's used so dang much). Also if the character has to think it through something ELSE is wrong. The guy should be:
A. (This should have been what happened at the very beginning in chapter 1) Downright terrified about WTH just happened.
B. Hurt too badly to think and would blurt it out.
C. (This is your stance but also shaky ground) Still terrified. Frankly, people don't just go "Oh, I'm a pony yay." They go, "OH MY BUCKING HELL WHAT THE BUCK IS THIS? HELP HELP HELP HELP GET THEM AWAY FROM ME!" Ecetera. Ecetera. Ecetera. Until the person gets committed to an asylum and has to blurt stuff out to Celestia. Even if he's releived he should be terrified still because 1. he just DIED and people in the other world think he is COMPLETELY DEAD. 2. He ISN'T dead which bucks with the brain. 3. He's not human which evokes the above reaction.
It doesn't go to the other way around because your first instinct is to say "I'm a human, I'm not from here." And if you DO lie about not naturally being a pony, your being terrified/mental state in and of itself would give it away within one minute.
This plot device makes me facehoove whenever I see it, and unless the story itself is a killer, I have a hard time justifying it. I'm still looking at this with promise. But this has gotten a big black mark.
117268 Thanks for reading !
SPOILER reply! (from Chapter 2: Foal Steps)
Well, from what I've seen in other HiE fics, this plot device is rarely used. Either that or I haven't read a LOT of them yet... Anyway I try to ignore other fics like this as much as possible, and I do have in mind something totally different from what's out there (at least I hope).
As for why Blink lied about his origin, telling instead that he can't remember anything... Well, that's what I would have done, honestly.
Also, Blink's character is pretty much mine. I'm quite a strange person in real life (imo); I left my country without the smallest of hesitation. I had only a few friends and the relation between me and my family is quite one sided ( as in they love me a lot, I respect them but not greatly love them back ).
So that might explain a lot why Blink had (apparently) almost no problems in adapting to the new situation.
As I said during my first comments, the story will have its share of mysteries, loose ends and whatever you want to call them, but in the end, everything will be . . . revealed
Also, everything in this fic (that is not show fact) is from my own opinion. There will be a lot of things some readers may not agree with (religious matters, beliefs, character development of ponies beyond the show etc) but frankly, I can't write something that everyone will like (especially a HiE type of story). sry :(
“It sure seems delicious,” I added, but having mixt feeling in my heart.
That is such a cute spelling error
. Hey, ALEXAROTH, since English isn't your native language (though you're doing damn well that being the case) do you have a proofreader/editor who can go through it for you?
Story has been sent to the pre-readers and editors and I hope I can post it today
115660 luna is best pony.
Heh, you're keeping the pace nice and slow, there's a good piece of fore-shadowing thrown into the mix at the end, and only a couple of spelling and grammar mistakes in the whole thing.
I'm kind of wondering why you feel that you need somebody like me along for the trip, you're really good already
I also like this whole idea of him having a bizarre cutie mark, and no knowledge of a talent. I look forward to finding out just what it is.
Don't Blink
I swear if you use that then you will be a god
the cutie mark of steam punk death nice
banjokazooie.neoseeker.com/w/i/banjokazooie/thumb/e/e5/Kazooie.jpeg/300px-Kazooie.jpeg
Everytime I see Kazooies name I see the Character from the games
>I’m an . . . animal.
Humans are animals, therefore that fact has not changed
This part should be third person
1736082
I also knew this fact but now that I hear it from someone else I'm thinking
So what living thing (besides plantlife and the such) isn't an animal?
2423084 Google it
i laughed so hard when it said it resembled a chinese symbol
Whether
1129656 so I'm NOT the only one... on a side note does that symbol bear any meanings?
"And so I started eating, gently bringing the poorly-grasped spoon from the bowl to my mouth. Every now and my clumsiness would make me drop the spoon back into the bowl."
Every now and ~then~
At first i was skeptical about this fic, and then i read the first few chapters and I was like......4.bp.blogspot.com/-94VWahxq2QU/TdwFfFO2t8I/AAAAAAAAAJA/mmKEtAvI1gc/s1600/peter+griffin+-+go+on...++%25281%2529.jpg
i.imgur.com/qrbRv.png
Dontcha know? It's that creepy way death keeps track of you!
It means you're special talent is leaving a trail of death behind you! I think... oh well... starting to... get... tired...
*SLAP*
Thanks... i think
Well I was going to go to bed for tonight but nooOOOooo. You go and cliff hanger the hell out a me.
Loving the story so far!
3149204
I fell into the same trap as well. If only we could warn those readers yet to reach this point as well.
Analyzing this symbol:
i.imgur.com/qrbRv.png
Geeze, this is like looking at one of those psychiatric splotches they have you look at to see if you're a sociopath or whatever. Anways:
1) The entire picture is built off of a reaper's scythe, starting in the lower left edge and building towards the upper right. The blade is curved down from there to the lower right and segmented along its length into five sections.
2) Along the center of the scythe is the circular form that appears to be a body for some sort of creature, especially considering the obvious paws that symbolically branch off of it.
3) The two bladelike symbols at the bottom could represent mandibles or hand-scythes, Idk which.
All of this was interpretation, but the central scythe is obvious to me.
3473949
...scorpion?
AHA! The plot thickens!
that symbol is the grim reaper and don't bother trying to don't deny it.
3958164 omg i see it
That symbol on Midnight's flanks is skeith from .hack gu