This is an intense opening. I can't wait to see what else Steven does, and how many more who underestimate him will learn he's more than what he lets them know

“She worked two jobs to keep us alive. Until one day… I came home and found her getting beaten by loan sharks.”

“They ran. I took her to the hospital. That night, I put on a Halloween demon mask, grabbed a kitchen knife, and went hunting.”

He stared at the wall, eyes blank.

“They were B-ranks. I killed them without trying.”

He shook his head and turned away.

“Next night, I broke into a test site. Wanted to know the truth. Found out I was an S+. Maybe higher.”

“Security saw. I ran. But not before someone important noticed the screen.”

He smirked again.

“Dennis Costerwell. Head of the Canterlot Royal Guild. Obsessed with finding the guy who scored higher than anyone in recorded history.”

“That guy… is me.”

He cracked his neck, stretched, and finally pulled down his hood.

His messy, dark green hair fell over his eyes—those glowing, dangerous eyes. Emerald with slits like a dragon's.

“But hey… I’m just your average F-rank loser, right?”

“Let’s go back to the beginning of my story,” he muttered to himself, eyes narrowing.

Remove this part of the quoted text from the story, it is summarized until the next chapter, and put it in the final place of this text with each one and the monster is dead in this part "well I think I'll tell you how it all started, it will be a great chat or let me tell you a story" because you are doing a flashback, you are telling how it happened and because.
This part is a summary of the idea, which will be told in 1 or 2 chapters, the story is good, but be careful when you put it by accident, if you want to summarize how the chapter will be, put it in a draft or notepad, it was just a tip I received.
If someone is in doubt what to write, they can ask.

"My Vampire System"

Great story. And I must say that the story is rough gem that needs a polish with future chapters. Also similar to
"clopicus vile" comment I would like to belive you might want to listen to the audio book wizard detective its a good listen. Am wondering what skill/skills steven might get and wondering when discord shows up.

Regards

Kingofspirits1

Can't wait to see what happens next

Before I even read a word of this, I have to ask--are any of this been inspired by those PocketFM ads that show up on YouTube all the time?? Because from this summary really compares Spike in this story to this Quinn Talen character from "My Vampire System" where Quinn is claimed to be the only human that doesn't have any superpowers (at least to everyone else in the world).

I honestly hope Spike isn't this story's version of Quinn Talen...

12144644
I have never read Vampire System... not the first person to mention it though... and honestly not interested.

“It just makes the day I burn this whole world down… all the sweeter.”

Oh, a potential Villain or Anti-Villain Arc?

Talia Sparks led them—straight-backed, uniform spotless, her violet eyes scanning the room like a commander checking for strategic threats.

Beside her was Susan Schmidt, arms crossed, sharp eyes flashing with her signature arrogance.

Reina Dashner had her hands in her pockets, chewing gum and looking bored. She was clearly here for food, not fanfare.

Abigail Smith walked with a confident gait, nodding at a few of the students she recognized.

Rachel Whitestone floated above it all with effortless grace, her enchanted earrings glowing faintly, a look of polite detachment on her face.

Penny Piper bounced slightly on her toes, already humming some chaotic jingle under her breath.

And finally, there was Felicity Shire. Quiet, serene, walking half a step behind the others with her hands folded gently over her stomach and a soft smile that didn’t quite reach her eyes.

So, Twilight ( Or Sci-Twi. ), Sunset Shimmer, Rainbow Dash, Applejack, Rarity, Pinkie Pie, and Fluttershy respectfully?

The first tray slid forward. It was Talia's.

She didn’t even look at him.

None of them did.

They MIGHT REGRET that later on.

Except one.

“Thank you,” whispered a soft voice.

Steven paused. Just briefly.

His green eyes flicked up. Fluttershy was standing there—genuinely looking at him, holding her tray with both hands like she meant the words.

At least she's in character.