• ...
 9
 555

White Moon comes into ponyville looking for a place to stay, and when he goes missing in the night, he's found in the one place no one wants him. their minds.

First Published
1st Jan 2012
Last Modified
17th Oct 2012
#1 · 273w, 3d ago · · · New Arrival ·

great start. two tips though. stopping putting who's going to speak infront of the dialogue, it makes it feel a script. For the thoughts, pick a brighter color, I can barely read it.

4.5 stars, broski.

i am working on chapter 3 dont worry, i already have raritys introduction to White moon done, i just have to get rainbow dash and Applejack:twilightblush:

i need to change the description

sorry bout the half of a chapter rarity's intro got lost on my now broke other computer

i like this story please finish:fluttercry:

#6 · 232w, 11h ago · · · Night ·

Will get more in after work.

Comment posted by Hoover deleted at 3:11am on the 30th of October, 2013
Comment posted by STURKDEL deleted at 3:11am on the 30th of October, 2013
#9 · 179w, 3d ago · · · Night ·

HAHAH ME! Looks like we can't do that! NOW WHAT YOU GONNA DO!?

Login or register to comment