Twilight Sparkle’s coronation was supposed to be a triumphant celebration, but in a single moment, everything went wrong. An unknown poison attack left the newly crowned princess in a coma, and when she finally opens her eyes, the Equestria she knew is gone.
Ruling over this twisted new order is Daybreaker, a fiery, tyrannical incarnation of Celestia. Though her grip on the realm is merciless, Daybreaker’s attitude toward Twilight is unsettlingly tender, overprotective, flirtatious, and suspiciously fixated on keeping Twilight at her side.
As Twilight tries to balance Daybreaker’s unnerving care with the ruthless reality of her rule, one burning question remains: Can Twilight somehow bring her beloved mentor back, or is Celestia forever lost behind Daybreaker’s blazing eyes? And what is behind this uncharacteristic behavior that hints at a secret Daybreaker may be desperate to hide?
Note: Set after the season 3 finale. This AU splits off from the canon from the Royal Wedding onwards. Chrysalis never attacked and Discord is still in stone.
Cover Art by Little Tigress
I like the start of the story, it's evocative and vivid. I think House Blueblood might have overplayed their hand though, as Celestia is definitely going to want to know what happened and who was responsible.
12071581
Oh, they've definitely taken it too far. This is a story about Daybreaker for a reason.
It's always great when you recognize an author before you even read the description. You've definitely come out swinging with stories Bluntie. Still Mortal, Still Alive is a story I'm still excited to see more of, but this description and prologue of this story has intrigued me as well. Have my upvote and track, and while I'm at it, follow as well!
Before I read this I just have to say: YES!!!! FINALLY!!!
Honestly it feels so rare when I see a story published that I completely enjoy. There's actually been a lot of great stories that's been published during the past month. Can't wait to see how this story goes.
This is the third story with a similar plot in my memory. Unfortunately, none of the previous ones are finished. Let's see what happens to this one.
Really?
Mmm.
90% of them sounds like they don't even deserve to have there titles, let alone be at the very table. They seem to all forget that there family tree was originated from commoners, everyone starts somewhere and the ponies who earned those titles are the ones who deserved them, not the ponies who inherited them. Might have been several centuries ago or even a millennium but it's still there.
Hate Blueblood, he's my least favorite character, ever.
Blueblood's train of thought: Hmmm yes, lets make this planned assassination as obvious as possible.
Like seriously, your not even giving a challenge here.
There are only 2 other stories like this, though I guess technically 3. One of them that was published earlier this year was cancelled and I was severely disappointed because it was such a great story so far too. I hope to see this completed.
12071600
I wasn't even paying attention to who wrote the story. I just saw the tags and description and was like: "yeah, im definitely going to enjoy reading this".
But now that I know who wrote the story, im already gonna give it a like.
i mean....if it goes beyond a hundred thousand words I'll give it a try .
Let him cook?!
I haven't read this yet, gonna wait till it's longer. But if it's going to be anything like a student one lost, count me in brotha.
Funnily enough, I wanted to make a similar story, but quickly gave up on it lol. Let's see how this one goes!
Why oh why do I get the feeling Blueblood won't get the quick death he'll soon be begging for?
a.L.? As in after Luna? That would have been a fascinating discussion to listen in on when she got back.
You've had my curiosity with the base of the story, and now you've got my attention with that prologue. It's simple but I feel like this story will truly grow into something great. I'll be watching your story with great interest.
At least, I understood why you'd said, "final cover art to follow"...
Esto pinta bien, espero otra capitulo 👌
12071600
I'm really pleased that you like what I'm sharing here. There should be a new chapter for “Still Mortal, Still Alive” soon.
12071604
So as soon as I get a bit inactive here for a month, suddenly all the good new stuff comes online... I kind of want to complain, but that actually sounds pretty nice.
12071611
Yes, really
I mean, I don't make a big secret of the fact that I'm not a big fan of the idea of a noble class myself. In my headcanon, all the nobles are descended from past heroes who actually did something great and were looked up to anyway, so it was natural to give these special people some sort of title as a reward. Over the years, however, these families have developed badly. The families have begun to believe that they are better than others by birthright because the blood of great heroes flows in their veins. So at some point, only noble families multiplied among themselves to ensure the purity of their bloodlines. As a result, they believe they are genetically superior to others through a form of breeding. This belief, coupled with the power and privileges that the nobility have enjoyed from an early age, eventually turned them into a group of elitist idiots.
Who says that this attack necessarily bears the handiwork of Blueblood? His family will surely include more high-ranking nobles. Or... No, I've already said enough. Once again, I can't keep my mouth shut.
Insert evil author laugh here.
That's how I want to see it and no other way.
12071649
Was actually the inspiration for this story. Actually, I just wanted to write a romantic comedy with a bit of drama and adventure and found the concept quite convincing.
12071741
No horses were injured in the making of this story. (Screams of pain in the background) Ignore the noises.
12071788
Luna; sister what year is it?
Tia: 1001 a.L
Luna: a.L? What does that stand for?
Tia (sweating profusely): After... Lu...La... Lava cake.
Luna: Really, sister, you changed the calendar because of a new kind of cake?
Tia: Yes...?
Luna: Facehoof
That's more or less how I imagine it.
12071807
I am glad that I have aroused your interest.
Each non-filler word (like of or and) in a title, should be capitalized.
Great start though, good luck!
12071908
Thank you very much. Hearing that from you means a lot to me. (I've read all your major stories)
12071938
I hope you enjoyed the stories, and it was my pleasure to comment! I cant wait to see where you go with this one.
Though its bugging me that the title still isn't fixed. Dont suppose you'd mind adjusting that to 'Solar Storm', eh?
Thanks.
I honestly don't think it was Blueblood, it would be too obvious even for him.
(The fanfic is on the right track)
12071980
They were exactly to my taste.
Oops. I had already changed that in my head.
12071741
Not even blueblood is stupid enough to posion someone with his own branded wine, obviously who ever trying to kill twlight trying to shift the blame so they kill two birds with one stone
Good start!
Possibilities I see for the assassination attempt:
1) Blueblood and/or his house are brain dead
2) This is the first shot in a civil war. Which is why house Blueblood are willing to be so blatant. Of course why not try to take out all three then?
3) Someone is framing House Blueblood. IMO the most likely one. If this is the case I hope Blueblood makes it out alright; but I don’t have high hopes
I am wagering that twilight is dead when she comes back, or celestia had to do something very aweful to save her/bring her back. That's the secret.
12071879
To be fair, it is REALLY good cake.
There was a story I used to read a long while back that had a somewhat similar premise (though I believe in that one it was more a cutie map mishap or something that led to Twilight being sent to an alternate dimension where Daybreaker existed because that world's Twilight died fighting Nightmare Moon). Was a pretty good story, then it just stopped updating one day.
If you do the same, I will find you. Then, ohohohoh. Then, I'll steal all your charge cables and watch as you panic as your batteries all slowly run out.
Just kidding, but this story looks interesting so far! I look forward to more!
12072372
And I'll take all his devices as vengeance.
I really liked this.
Attracted by the plot the summary suggests, and I get this, good start I liked it! :3
I hope to see more!
12072372
By the way, I really wish I could read that one you mentioned.
12072382
Sounds like 'A Student Once Lost' by Chiefs999
Good read, but on hiatus for over 5 years now.
We're off to a good start here. I will follow this with great interest
Very good! I'm waiting for the first chapter.
Okay so the nobility holding inane longing for the supposed (if not completely fictitious) unicorn nobility superiority dating to Princess Platinum (presuming she was a real figure at all) is not all that surprising. They're just mad that Harmony and whatever God/Goddess rules over all didn't choose them like the spoiled brats they are.
The story really gets going with that "oh fish!" moment with the poison/potion. I look forward to seeing what happens next.
Is that Yakovlev's art?
I wonder how much time has past. Will probably get to that but it seems Celestia (or daybreaker) knew when Twilight would wake up.
Hmmm... Question, do they use the term "person"? Kinda always thought it was "pony" or "creature".
.... Wow, the description was not exaggerating with the overprotectiveness.
.... Months? That's short. I was expecting years.
Well Celestia has been busy.
There it is.
I feel concerned that it only took a few months for Celestia lose her marbles.
Kinda sounds like Daybreaker's first order of her new rule was redecorate the entire castle considering it's only been months. If it's been years I wouldn't have so many questions and concerns but months?
Ok so im concerned what happened to Luna.
Here we go.
Honestly, if it wasn't Blueblood I would have come up with the theory that it was staged, however I never took Blueblood for someone being smart, so...
... This is already suspicious.
Hah, that's an understatement.
.... You really shouldn't have said that.
Mmmm.
I am curious what happened to her friends. I am positive there fine since Daybreaker wouldn't have any reason to harm them and I doubt she would want to bring harm to close friends of Twilight.
Of course that's what she is concerned about.
Loved it. Hate how long my comment is. Very excited to see chapter 2.
This Daybreaker seems more nervous compared to other Daybreaker when around Twilight, neat
Like the story so far and I think it has a lot of potential
12072928
Its probably should be ponies but lots of people just forget and or just put people because it's easier and at the end of the Day it won't break the story
12072929
I think it might have something to do with becoming Daybreaker recently? Just my theory. Plus it was very recent too, didn't Luna take years to become Nightmare Moon? For Celestia it probably only took a couple hours, maybe even a couple minutes, but there's the possibility of other events that were involved, the Canterlot Wedding being one example. If she became Daybreaker simply because Twilight almost died then Canterlot Wedding could have played a part in Celestia sudden transformation.
That would actually make an interesting story, Celestia becomes Daybreaker because of what Chrysalis has done in making everyone turn there backs on Twilight.
12072932
True. Also, very funny.
I like how Twilight's thinking critically about how to gain more information.
While they represent an ominous change, I like the renovations completed in the castle. Although I am concerned about what the change from flags representing both sisters to ones representing only Celestia might indicate about Luna's situation.
Oh, wow, he's dumb.
It's heartwarming and sweet, or perhaps bittersweet, that Twilight recognizes Celestia despite her changes.
Daybreaker's response to Twilight's arrival was amusing. I'm looking forward to seeing how she explains the drastic changes to Twilight.
Minor note but Internal monologues shouldn't use the same structure as spoken dialogue. If its in a pair of "These things" its spoken even if you put 'she thought' at the end. A better formating choice would be to put it in italics or to set it aside from the rest of the sentence like.
For example, this. She thought to herself.
12072980
Oh, I didn't know that. Thanks for pointing that out. When I have a bit more free time later today I'll read over the chapter again and improve it accordingly.
12072944
We will see.
I've seen cleverer ideas than this statement
Thank you. I've rarely tried to write something amusing, and I don't know if these posts are actually funny or just silly.
12072932
Oh no, a pun
12072928
It just slipped through my fingers. My Equestrian is a bit rusty
Maybe she just watched too many DIY videos on YT?
In most depictions of him, he is not exactly the brightest candle on the cake. But there are always exceptions. For example in one of the (in my eyes) best fanfics from the site "Rites of Ascension"
He will survive... probably
I'm excited about that too.
Aren't you the author?
Huh, who said that?
Can you blame her?
12072983
Here is a bit more on the topic in case you want to brush up though I'd recommend simply using italics.