Rainbow Dash tricks Fluttershy into watching a scary movie, in the hopes of being asked to stay the night, but will her plan backfire?
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jacob.galvin
Joined 2nd Sep, 2012 ·
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wat
I mean that in the best way I can think of.
Rainbow Dash, you villainous BASTARD!
Wait.
Fluttershy, you psychotic--!
static2.fjcdn.com/comments/I+told+you+to+stay+out+of+my+shed+_f6a735512389e5e6ae89ad7b044f075f.jpg
NEVERMIND.
Ha, make them watch Doctor Who's "Blink". Only people who watch it would get it.
Silent Hill :D
i.imgur.com/j4Nnv.png ~Wolf
diu vivere in lupus imperium!
Wow that is just funny. *sees it's incomplete*
MOAR
This is some good work!
Great story, but multiple errors. Are you a new writer?
personally, i'd say...'the cabin in the woods'.
"BORING!! What you need is 'Friday the 13th'! Or maybe 'Child's Play'!"
...whatever, vi. oh, and nice story, man.
Troll 2.
Lolnope.avi
Either... Friday the 13th... unless Jason's disfigurement is symphasized, Halloween, which I'm not sure will work badly or not, or Child's Play. ...Why am I suggesting these things? I might hurt Fluttershy.
One Rainbow hasn't watched. That'll make me feel better.
Applooza Chainsaw Massacre!
Hmmm... this is interesting. A rather immagintive diffrent take on Flutterdash here. Admittedly a little bit of a dark take but as long as they wind up together hey, I can live with it.
Next up I'm hoping for Fluttershy to not get scared once more, and surprise Dash with popping a question that Rainbow was wanting to ask.
Keep going.
please
you want Fluttershy to feel sympathy for the bad guy then have them watch Scream (the first one)
Good horror movie, legitimately scary, and the mother of all twists at the end.
Have her play a scary video game nest.Either Amnesia:The Dark Descent,Eerie,or one of the Slender games
next*
XD This is funny!
I love little stories where Rainbow is trying to win over Fluttershy somehow. And I see where Fluttershy is coming from! Not only in the way that we often do end up rooting for the killers in movies like these (mostly because the main cast of horror movies are often douchebags or just plain stupid), but boy Fluttershy is just missing the point. XD Oh well, it's still funny. I'll track this. 
Well, bravo good sir/madam. You have accomplished what very few have. You have made me drop and laugh out loud, rolling on the floor as it were.
WRITE MORE DANGIT!
Sorry for shouting. This story is to good for me to resist though.
I'm surprised nobody has mentioned Watership Down.
1447239 totally agree Hitler Was brave and that little moustache was soooo hot
1446889
Derpy!
Not bad, but would recommend reading it again and pay attention to where your quotation marks are because a few are out of place or missing.
This looks cute.
Wait... That was really well written but... What?
While I do like it, there are issues throughout the story like when you forget to capitalize properly.
Also, things like this: "The mare was tackled to the ground, with the stallion on top of her. This is it Rainbow thought to herself, as soon as Fluttershy gets a look at his face, she'll freak out. It was only for a brief second, but he was finally visible to the camera. " Where you put in thoughts with nothing to separate them from narration.
I suggest italicizing thoughts so it would be less awkward to read. Like this: "The mare was tackled to the ground, with the stallion on top of her. This is it Rainbow thought to herself, As soon as Fluttershy gets a look at his face, she'll freak out. It was only for a brief second, but he was finally visible to the camera."
Alternatively, instead of quotations marks, you could just put a apostrophe around them, like this: "The mare was tackled to the ground, with the stallion on top of her. 'This is it' Rainbow thought to herself, 'As soon as Fluttershy gets a look at his face, she'll freak out.' It was only for a brief second, but he was finally visible to the camera."
Both are commonly used to separate thoughts from the narrative. And if you're wondering why I recommend you do this, just think about why you have to but quotation marks around dialog. Its the same thing. The only difference is that its internal.
1446690
Well, that would certainly freak Fluttershy into outer space, but what about "Time of the Angels", "Flesh and Stone", and "The Angels Take Manhattan"?
I think it would be interesting to see fluttershy get a view of other horror movies. That would be funny.
Please note that I made this comment to improve your story so that it can reach it's maximum ability. I did not make it to diminish you self esteem.
I am a a brony trying to help a brony. Not a know-it-all trying to hurt a brony's fleelings
I'll get some snacks while you put the move in, okay?”
Misspell
I'll get some snacks while you put the movie in, okay?”
she said it's the best thing she's seen this year.”That was a lie of course,
It needs a space between the " and the 'That'
she said it's the best thing she's seen this year.” That was a lie of course,
“is he alright?” she whispered, “he sounds sick.”
Capitals.
“Is he alright?” she whispered, “He sounds sick.”
“his special talent is metal work.”
Capitalize
“His special talent is metal work.”
“Turn it off Rainbow,”she pleaded.
Needs a space.
“Turn it off Rainbow,” she pleaded.
“How about we just watch a little more, she suggested, “the scary part's mostly over anyway.”
Quotes and capitalize.
“How about we just watch a little more," she suggested, “The scary part's mostly over anyway.”
The next few scenes were of some young mares and stallion playing around at their friends house
It ether needs to be a stallion or stallions also a young mare is a filly and a young stallion is a colt.
“what does he want?”
Caps
“What does he want?”
“it's just horrible,
Caps
“It's just horrible,
“don't worry about if Fluttershy, it's just a movie.”
Caps
“Don't worry about if Fluttershy, it's just a movie.”
“it must be awful for him,
Caps
“It must be awful for him,
I'm going to skip the remaining caps issues. Just give it a run through to find the rest.
doesn't make him bad.” If you ask me,
Inappropriate quotation marks
doesn't make him bad. If you ask me,
but the keep running from him.”
Misspell
but they keep running from him.”
the though to herself.
Wrong words.
she thought to herself.
“ But I don't have a horror movie collection,”
Unnecessary space between the " and the But
“But I don't have a horror movie collection,”
A grin appeared on Rainbows face,
Needs a '.
A grin appeared on Rainbow's face,
1447772 The 'Time of the Angles' and 'Flesh and stone' were what I like to call "OK". 'The Angles take Manhattan' was very emotional and wasn't much of a jump scare episode as blink.
But now I will attempt to have you all killed by posting an image of an angle that will materialize into all of your rooms. Don't blink or it takes you!
suptg.thisisnotatrueending.com/archive/15774256/images/1312215498500.gif
1446690
Hmmm images3.wikia.nocookie.net/__cb20110828163359/mlp/images/thumb/1/19/Fluttershy_Stare_S01E17.png/800px-Fluttershy_Stare_S01E17.png
Wonder if that would do anything to the weeping angels
1448020 This will be interesting...
1446690 Or the one with the library and the carnivorous shadows.
1448194 Oh god, no! Silence in the library!
I got a couple of suggestions for horror movies. That is if you continue to write this story. John Carpenter's The Thing, or Ridley Scott's Alien.
Why The Thing? Because the first thing to die is the dog, not counting the two Norwegians, which might make Fluttershy sympathetic towards the characters as they have no idea about the alien. The thought of everyone being paranoid of each other giving the added mystery of who's the infected (this is NOT a zombie movie). Not to mention this movie scared the living crap out of me since my childhood until I played Dead Space which the game was based off of.
Ridley Scott's Alien? Honestly because its a classic horror movie that isn't some cheesy slasher flick. Again, Dead Space was based off of this movie too.
I would say Steven Spielberg's Jaws, but Fluttershy being an animal pony would be more sympathetic towards the shark or questioning the logic of shark behavior.
1448225 Who turned out the lights?
lol, i now have a new way of going through all my horror movies again. you get 2 thumbs up sir!
Poltergeist. See if she still wants to be a tree.
1447248
Make it a double feature with Plague Dogs.
1447772 Pah! Child's play. What she needs to watch is The Waters Of Mars... that'll get her...
denver.mylittlefacewhen.com/media/f/img/mlfw1357_rainbow_dash_wtf.gif
To be serious though, this is excellence. A mustache for you!
Shoulda grabbed "The Grudge" gave me nightmares that did.
Manos: The Hands of Fate.
i give you four out of five moustaches.
good work
Here's the thing folks, this story isn't getting anywhere near enough views to warrant a second chapter. So it's unlikely there will be anymore.
1455300
And I thought I was evil with my not writing anything for months before having inspiration...
1455556
Silence in the Library / Forest of the Dead are definitely scary, the Vashta Narada left me with a fear of that damn skeleton in a suit for YEARS, and it still kinda scares me...
1447988
Dear lord youve killed us all, you crazy dragoncolt.
I love the fact that you called time of the angels ok then used a picture from it.
3 wubs awarded
1455300 You and I have very different ideas on "enough views". I demand more!
... Well, that plan failed.
I was actually expecting FlutterDash fluff; but this was just as cute.
Me gusta; you get a mustache for your epic work.
Although this is good as a one shot, I woudn't mind seeing Dash win over Fluttershy eventually.
Maybe it's a 35mm film projector, with optical sound, shot before panavision