The Mane Six--the spirits of the Elements of Harmony--have saved the world on numerous occasions. To this day, they still protect their country and the Princesses from any threats. Who then, protects the Mane Six?
This is my first attempt at Second Person POV. Constructive criticism is greatly appreciated. Friend-shipping is the main theme to this story, with a side of shipping later (I am incapable of writing a story that doesn't involve shipping. Terrible, I know).
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My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic Fanfiction
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Seems interesting, I'll follow it it see where it goes.
The protagonist reminds me very much of... well.. me, so I think you've done a really good job considering this being your first time doing a 2nd-person-perspective-story. Beautifully written too! I will track this without a doubt!
Good premise, but no self-respecting law enforcement agency would have just 1 guard patrolling at night. At the least, one patrol would have 2 guards.
And why didn't Luna get other night guards to replace him?
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I'll try not to disappoint you.
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I'm glad you were able to relate to the protagonist. I learned that making connections with the audience is important when writing a story. Thank you for your kind words.
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Ah, plot holes...looks like I have to fill in some of those in the next chapter. I usually write whatever comes to my head, so I tend to miss some points. I'm also lazy as a writer, so I tend to "tell" instead of "show." For example, I explained that there was only one guard. However, I didn't show why there was only one. Hopefully I can make some clarifications next time around. Thank you.
Hay Rainbow.
I see one little mistake of seeing Rarity and Rainbow Dash talk in the same paragraph.
Just spread out the two and you're fine. I love the chapter and would like to see where this'll go. 
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Fixed the mistake. Thank you!
...Go on.
dentist that goes by the name
Dentist is a personal noun, so 'that' should be 'who'.
If you acted like that in front of my former friends
'My' should be 'your' since you're still talking in second person.
another reason why to avoid other ponies.
Drop the 'why'.
indicating the lack of nourishment your body hasn’t received.
Lack is a negative word, so saying your body hasn't received it is a double negative. A better way to phrase it would be 'the lack of nourishment in your body' or something similar.
and all of the front door was locked
Drop the 'all of'.
the one’s you have known
Drop the apostrophe on ones, since it's not a possessive pronoun.
offered a hand shake
Kind of nitpicking, but shouldn't that be hoof shake? dl.dropbox.com/u/31471793/FiMFiction/Applejack_lolface.png
Really these are all little mistakes, the chapter itself was by and large an interesting and compelling read. I don't read too many stories from the perspective of a guard, much less from an adult blank flank so the concept itself is fresh and original. Points for that!
I'll give this a track; second-person stories are a favorite of mine and you pulled off the start of yours very well. Looking forward to the next chapter! dl.dropbox.com/u/31471793/FiMFiction/emoticons/misc_Lyra2.png
1450043 Awesome! I'll make sure to fix those silly mistakes. I can't believe I missed them. Ladies and Gentlemen, I present to you my new pre-reader/editor, Serene Breeze!
Welcome aboard.
Also, I know you probably won't tell, but...
Which character am "I" supposed to be shipping with...?
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Hmmm...which pony do you want me to ship 'you' with?
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media.tumblr.com/tumblr_lnaxxiThkQ1qb7lwy.gif
i will be honest this is almost like my life.
1553236
I'm glad people can relate to this story, especially in a second person POV.
Y U NO MAKE NEW CHAPTER?!??!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!
I can relate to this story alot. But I must ask, why have you not updated this story?
How ironic, I thought about this story just ten minutes ago, nice to see this finally updated! ^^
I'm glad to see that you are able to write this story! Now,we all know it won't be canceled.
Me like!
Boat
What did Rainbow do now? Wait, if there getting a royal guard.....
I hope I don't get fired.
I'm also relly glad to see this story being updated, I was intrested in this story.But when I saw it wasen't being updated,I was kinda sad.It semed like a very good story in the making.
Hand
Hand
Hand
*Hoof*
2094790 Whoopsie! One day I'll get the hang of this pony language. Thanks for pointing it out.
2095163 honest mistake.
This fanfic saved my marriage. Good read 10/10 would read again.
Now Im intrested next chapter please!
P.S.
"Oh cloud, you so fluffy."
Yes. This is me.
Last comment 26 weeks ago, *pokes* uhh question is this story still alive I'm very much interested
Update? :D
Today we honor the fallen story Night Guard. It served it's author well. We hope the story my be revived at a later date.