Rainbow Dash frowned. Twilight’s blush deepened and her eyes widened. She started to stammer a little before Rainbow cut her off.
“I can’t say I’ve ever thought of you that way.” Twilight’s ears drooped and she looked at the rug on the floor, her eyes feeling hot and over-bright. Before she could speak again, the cyan Pegasus continued, “I’m not saying no, so don’t get all mushy, Twi’. Let me explain.” Twilight glanced back up, her expression slightly more composed, although a small current of confusion was now running through her features. Her breathing relaxed a little.
“I say I never thought of you that way because apparently my gaydar’s a little off and I didn’t think you were into mares.” Rainbow’s smile turned into a smirk. “Sorry for making an assumption like that Twi’.” The lavender unicorn’s blush deepened a little, causing Rainbow’s smirk to grow. She continued, “I just always thought of you as a really good friend or a sister.” Twilight started to droop again before Rainbow interjected, “Hey I still haven’t said no. I’m just layin’ down my thoughts right now.”
“I thought of you like a friend who wasn’t into mares, so I didn’t really think about the possibility. I’ve been ‘round the block when it comes to straight mares, and I know from experience how uncomfortable it can be to get feelings for somepony whose brain is hardwired against the idea. It’s pretty uncomfortable, for both sides. Totally uncool. It’s been my policy since flight school to avoid making things awkward with straight mares.” Rainbow dash grinned and ran a hoof through her mane.
Twilight nodded gently and slowly, a little surprised at Rainbow’s effortless confidence talking about these sorts of things. She knew the Pegasus was more outgoing than herself, but this whole situation left her stammering and blushing like a school filly. She mentally cursed her own introverted nature. She had no idea where Dash was going yet, but the assurances had calmed her nerves enough for her to just sit and listen.
Rainbow stood up and paced a little, her grin fading as she became somewhat lost in contemplation. After a little while, she turned to face her friend and continued, “Even though I haven’t thought about it, here’s what I know. I know you’re smart. I know you’re funny. I know that we can talk about lots of different stuff and don’t get bored around each other. I know you’re awesome at magic and you’re not a big show-off about it like me.” Rainbow’s smile took on a sense of self-deprecation. Invisible strands tugged at the corners of Twilight’s mouth, pulling her into a ghost of a smile. “I also know that you’re pretty smokin’ hot.”
Twilight’s cheeks darkened considerably. She stammered out, “B-but, I thought you said you hadn’t-“
Rainbow cut her off again, smirking at Twilight’s tomato-red face. “I meant I hadn’t thought of you romantically. I’m not made of stone, Twi’. It’s not like I only check out mares I know are interested. I knew within five minutes of meeting you that I was physically attracted to you.” Twilight’s head reeled at the revelation. The room felt too warm all of a sudden. As her mind raced, Rainbow burst out laughing and collapsed on the floor, clutching her chest and waving her hind hooves in the air. “I’m sorry!” she wheezed, “It’s just-your FACE!” She got herself under control wiping the tears of mirth from her eyes, sitting up. She caught the look the unicorn was giving her and grinned sheepishly. “Sorry, I know you’re not exactly comfortable talkin’ about all this, Twi’. I’m not trying to make you feel bad.”
Twilight’s withering glare softened, changing to a look of thought before a soft blush kissed her cheeks once more. She asked Rainbow softly, “You really think I’m pretty?”
“Course I do, Twi’. There isn’t a pony in Ponyville who’d think you weren’t pretty.” Twilight’s blush deepened again and she smiled abashedly at the compliment. Rainbow smiled and stood back up, slowly trotting closer to the lavender mare. “My point is, all those things I know would be the same sorta stuff I’d be trying to find out on a first date anyway. I might not have thought about it before but I know we’re compatible. I’d have to be stupid to not say yes to a date.”
Twilight’s eyes widened and a quivering smile graced her lips. “I-I…I’m glad, Rainbow,” she stammered out, shaking a little from the rush of relief. She got herself a little more under control and cleared her throat. “So, uh…”
Rainbow smiled broadly. “How about we go for a coffee? Things go well maybe we can do dinner, too.”
Twilight blinked. “Now?”
“Sure,” Rainbow said over her shoulder, cantering towards the door. She shot Twilight a sly look, “don’t know where you’d get the idea that I’d want to go slowly.” Twilight’s face went crimson, and Rainbow barked laughter. “That’s not what I meant! Get your mind out of the gutter, Twi’!”
Twilight coughed and started giggling. Her nervousness was melting away and being replaced by elation. Her horn glowed purple as she levitated a saddle bag around her neck and she headed towards the door. “Okay, Rainbow. I’d love a coffee.”
Rainbow smiled and said, “Oh good, you can string more than four words together. Here I thought I was gonna hafta do all the talking.” Twilight giggled and shoulder-checked Rainbow playfully. The two headed down the street towards downtown Ponyville and a coffee shop.
“I must say, I’m rather impressed by you. I’ve been trying to sort out how I felt for weeks now, and you were so articulate without even trying.”
Rainbow grinned at Twilight’s words. The two sat at a small table outside a café, Twilight nursing a small cappuccino while Rainbow practically guzzled a large, sugary affair loaded with flavored syrups. The two had chatted idly about a range of topics, including Twilight’s latest studies which Rainbow only understood half of, Rainbow’s latest moves she was perfecting which Twilight barely followed at all, the newest Daring Do which they both had devoured in a day, and the latest goings on in and around Ponyville. There were some early jitters, but their conversation quickly transformed into easy-going and any lapses were comfortable and devoid of awkward embarrassment. It was a while before the conversation had shifted back to the fact that they were indeed on a date.
“Hey, I know you’re way smarter than me about a lot of stuff, but lemme guess,” Rainbow raised an eyebrow, “this is your first date huh?” Appraising Twilight’s reaction, Rainbow nodded and answered her own question. “Thought so. Hey, don’t be embarrassed, when I first met you, you weren’t really interested in regular friends, let alone romance. You’re just outta your comfort zone. Plus, you’re so quiet and…uh….Twilighty.” She finished lamely. Twilight giggled.
“The word you’re looking for is ‘introverted,’ and I guess you’re right. I was always so busy studying back in Canterlot that I didn’t really have time for friends. I didn’t really think about dating at all. I guess I thought it was something other ponies did.”
Rainbow gulped down some more of her hot, coffee-flavored milkshake. “So how come you never told anypony here you were into mares? You couldn’tve thought any of the gang would disapprove. I mean, I was already out to them before you moved in and I came out to you less than a month after we became friends.”
Twilight paused and frowned a little, not out of annoyance but from self-reflection. “I, uh, didn’t really know I was into mares until I realized I’d developed feelings for you. I guess I just hadn’t thought about it.”
Rainbow raised an eyebrow quizzically. “So are you into stallions normally? That would explain my gaydar mess-up.”
Twilight chuckled. “I guess so, but to be honest I didn’t really think about stallions either. I haven’t really had feelings for anypony before.” She smiled at Dash, sipping at the dregs of her espresso cup. Her cyan date nodded a little in thought. She was happy that Twilight had loosened up and was talking more freely as their date had gone on, but was surprised that someone so prone to Twilightyness, err, introversion, had such a vague understanding of her own feelings. She felt a little out of her sorts thinking about it. Or maybe it was the way Twilight’s mane caught glints of the sun, shining deep blue flecks to dazzle her eyes that was making her feel lightheaded.
She blushed a little. To her pleasant surprise, the date was going better than she had expected. She had been honest with Twilight at the start; she had not contemplated the two of them as a couple. But as they sat and talked she was taken off-guard by how natural everything felt. She listened as Twilight related a story about a fillyhood crush she had on a colt a year ahead of her, all the while paying slightly more attention to the way the lavender mare’s eyes danced through the recollection. ‘Gosh, she’s pretty,’ Rainbow thought.
At the conclusion of her story, Twilight glanced at Rainbow. She rested her cheek on one hoof, idly running her other around the edge of her coffee cup. Her eyelids drooped down in a look of absolute contentment and a large, wobbly smile was plastered on her face. She was looking back at Twilight, but she seemed glazed over, like she wasn’t really taking anything in. Rainbow breathed deeply and let out a soft sigh. Twilight giggled. “Rainbow, you okay?”
Rainbow snapped out of her reverie. She sat up straight, her eyes flying all the way open. The sudden jerk of the motion knocked her mostly empty coffee cup over. Twilight giggled again as a red stain spread across the cyan mare’s face, dyeing her cheeks a soft purple.
“What? Oh!” Her blush deepened and she coughed nervously. “I’m fine! Just zoned out for a minute.” Twilight continued to giggle a little. ‘Smooth, Dash…’
They finished their coffees and walked back to the library. The afternoon sun was starting to swing low, casting a haze of orange across the sky. Rainbow had lapsed into silence, a small smile across her face. She kept glancing at the lavender angel walking next to her and quickly looking away. Not paying attention, her hoof caught on a rock and she pin wheeled to keep from face planting in the dirt. Twilight was gracious enough not to laugh, but had a hard time stifling her giggles as Rainbow blushed yet again and laughed nervously. Twilight turned to her as they reached the door, her expression growing a little shy once again. “So, do you want to come back inside?” Rainbow seemed to come out of the haze that had settled around her head the previous half hour and she looked up into the sky distractedly.
“Actually, I need to go think for a little while.”
Twilight’s face fell. “Oh… So no dinner then?” She ran her hoof through her hair and looked away. Rainbow flinched guiltily then quickly grinned.
“Hey, I don’t mean it like that. That went well. Honestly, it went better than I was expecting.” Twilight’s face brightened, but was marked with some confusion. Rainbow continued, “I’ve just gotta clear my head some. I’ll be back in a little while and we can go to dinner, kay?”
Twilight smiled, still looking a little confused. “Okay, Rainbow.” Her face went a little red and she looked nervous again, before quickly stepping forward and pecking Rainbow on the cheek. Losing her nerve she turned around and went inside quickly, quipping “See you in a bit,” over her shoulder. Rainbow’s eyes widened a little and she absent-mindedly raised a hoof to her cheek, feeling the raised heat of her blush. Despite herself, a dopey grin bloomed across her face.
“See you in a bit, Twilight,” she quietly stated to no one in particular, her voice cracking more than she expected. Her blush deepened and she quickly took off, spreading her wings and turning through the air in lazy circles. She spotted a nicely sized cloud to plop down on and think.
‘Okay, Rainbow. What was that all about?’ She replayed the date in her head. Despite her modestly sizable experience in the world of dating, she was kind of at a loss. ‘Why’d I keep stumbling all over myself? I feel like a school filly again!’ She sighed, remembering the way Twilight looked across the little café table from her. She felt her face grow hot, which made her jump back to her train of thought. ‘Why am I blushing so much? I never blush!’ She flopped over from lying in the cloud on her belly onto her back. “Arrgh! Why am I being so uncool right now?!” She cried out loud.
Snorting in frustration, her mind shifted to past relationships. While it was true she had done a fair share of dating, both in Ponyville and back in flight school it all seemed so incidental. She’d held a couple of marefriends here and there for a while, but they had hardly gone beyond the early dating phase. Most of them seemed to end in apathy rather than heart-break, now that she thought about it. ‘Is it just that I’ve never dated anyone that meant anything to me?’ She tried to wrap her head around that thought. ‘Does Twilight mean that much to me? I mean she’s my friend, but..’ She played through the last two years since Twilight had come to Ponyville. A rapid-fire of images played through her head. Twilight looking wind-blown after their first muddy, rainy, windy meeting. The deep connection she felt to Twilight and all of her friends when the elements of harmony were activated. Her look of exasperation whenever Rainbow careened into the library from a failed stunt. Conversation after conversation, sleep overs and picnics, laughter and hardship. Image after image played through her head as she tried to make sense of it all.
‘Okay, so I’ve grown close to Twilight. She’s one of my best friends in the world. Of course she means something to me.’ Rainbow sat up, frowning slightly. More images played through. A soft glance, a gentle smile, the slight sway of a flank. Heat rose in her cheeks. ‘Am I lying to myself?’ Frustration rose and Rainbow kicked off the cloud, spinning lazy circles through the sky. The late afternoon air cooled her face and tousled her mane. She thought about her recent dating experience, or rather her lack thereof. Since Twilight arrived, she hadn't gone out with anyone. As she thought about it, she remembered turning a couple of mares down. She remembered telling herself at the time that it was because she was so busy training, but she started to question the validity of that excuse.
All this thinking was getting to her. She was a pony of action! So, what action did she want to take? She turned through the air, flipping into some gentle barrel rolls. She quickly sped up, putting slightly more effort into her flying, zigging and zagging through the air at breakneck speeds. She closed her eyes and tried to lose herself in flying for a little while.
“SoIwaswonderingifyouwantedtogotothedancewithme?” Rainbow squeaked, glancing around the room rapidly, her eyes alighting on the object of her affection for scant seconds before leaping anywhere else, as if worried looking would cause her eyes to catch fire. The light peach filly’s face grew pink and she started looking around rapidly, too.
“I-I’m sorry Dash,” Cloudy Moon said slowly, “but I’m not into mares.” She paused awkwardly. Rainbow’s face fell. Cloudy gained control of her eyes and looked at Rainbow. She was clearly embarrassed, but Rainbow could see sadness in her expression, too. “I really am sorry, Rainbow. You’re a really nice pony.” Her nerve broke and she hurried away at a canter. Rainbow looked down at the cloudy floor, her face burning and her eyes misted with tears she willed herself to not release.
Rainbow slowed down her flight to a soft glide. The memory lead to others from that year at flight school. Cloudy Moon was one of her few friends at Flight School aside from Gilda and Fluttershy. After the embarrassing failure, the two of them avoided each other. As time marched on, they became strangers. That was a catalyst moment, Dash thought. After that, she scolded herself if she thought about straight ponies she knew and rarely initiated anything, preferring to be asked so she’d be absolutely sure the pony in question was interested in her. ‘But that’s not all, is it?’ Rainbow thought, 'Friends became taboo. I didn’t want to drift apart from anypony like I did with Cloudy.’
She re-alighted on the cloud she had taken off from, still deep in thought. Her attention turned back to Twilight. She felt like she was coming out of a fog as new memories paraded through her head. Dozens of glances quickly halted, fleeting thoughts pushed away subconsciously, fluttering butterflies ignored. Everything snapped into place. She smiled sheepishly to herself before flying back towards the library through the slowly setting sunlight, her whole body lighter than she ever remembered it being.
Twilight turned towards the door after three tentative knocks. She levitated a bookmark into place before standing from her desk and heading over to answer. She was greeted by a subdued but smiling Rainbow Dash.
“Hey, Twi’. Mind if I come in before we go to dinner? I think I have some stuff to say before we go.” Twilight’s brows knotted together anxiously, but she stood aside to let the Pegasus through. Rainbow floated over to the couch and sat on all fours. She smiled in a kind of tired way and motioned Twilight over to join her.
The lavender unicorn headed over with some uncertainty, sitting next to Rainbow. She smiled uncertainly. “Everything okay, Rainbow?”
The cyan mare inhaled deeply. “I kinda realized something about myself at the coffee place today,” she began, slowly picking up speed as she got her thoughts in order, “when I was a filly in flight school, I asked out a friend of mine out who was straight, and the two of us drifted apart from the embarrassment. Since then, I’ve had kinda a hang-up about friends. I think I may’ve had a hang-up with everypony who was interested in me, too, in case things didn’t work out and I’d lose another friend like that. I act all cool and confident about dating, but I think the longest relationship I’ve had was for a month or two.” She shuffled nervously in her seat, pulling at her mane with a hoof. “I’ve been lying to myself, so I lied to you too, Twi’, I just didn’t realize it.” She bit her lip, mulling things over.
Twilight was very still, not sure where the conversation was going. She opened her mouth to say something in the conversation pause before thinking better of it. After a moment, Rainbow continued, “when I agreed to the date I thought we’d have a good time and maybe go out a few more times, but then it’d fizzle like the others and we’d just go back to bein’ friends like most’ve my other relationships have done.” She looked up from the ground and straight at Twilight, conviction burning in her eyes. “But at the coffee place some of the stuff I’ve been hiding from myself sorta bubbled over. I do have feelings for you, Twilight. You’re this awesome, wonderful pony that’s been there for me all the time. I didn’t let myself think about it, because you’re a friend I don’t ever wanna lose, even after you said you had feelings for me.” Rainbow paused again. Twilight’s heart was soaring. “What I guess I’m getting at is I’m scared, Twi’. I don’t ever wanna lose our friendship ‘cause it means too much to me. But I don’t wanna just be friends either. I don’t know what to do, I just keep thin-”
Rainbow’s speech was interrupted by Twilight's lips. Her magenta eyes went wide before fluttering closed and she leaned into the kiss. The two pony’s lips parted and their tongues danced together, little jolts of electricity running up and down Rainbow’s spine. She reached out to the lavender mare and wrapped her hooves around her waist, pulling their bodies closer together. Fireworks went off in Rainbow’s head, obliterating her doubts. After what seemed to be ages, the two parted, breathing heavily. Rainbow’s eyes fluttered open to stare into the purple depths of Twilight’s eyes which twinkled with warmth and reflected her own longing. Clearing her throat, Rainbow managed to only pant out “Wow…”
Twilight smiled affectionately at the cyan mare. Mirth on her voice, she said, “you think too much, Rainbow.”
The two mares stood and walked towards the door. The first of many dinners together awaited.
Author’s notes: This is my first fanfiction piece in over a decade. I just got the urge to write it randomly, and I liked the idea of a bold, suave RD discovering she’s not quite as on top of this whole romance thing as she thought.
I left this as incomplete because in all honesty this was quite a bit of fun to write and I might get the urge to keep going later. If anyone has any critiques, please share; I’ve got some dragon-thick skin so feel free to shred. After all, this IS a fluff piece, can’t get too worked up about it.
Unleash the dogs of critique!
Or not, whatever. This was a lot of fun to write. Twidash is best pony pairing.
1437630 yes, twidash is definitely best...




And I certainly hope you do. I like the characterization, it was really well written, and cute as hay! All I noticed was a small spelling mistake of Twilight (Tilight), but I can't fault you much for it. You set out to write something sweet and fluffly, and you achieved just that.
As for proper critique, all I can really say is that the idea behind this particular chapter has been done to death (as it would be, really), and there's not really that much it does to change the formula of these types of fic's, so to speak. That said, it's certainly one of the better examples of this type of story done right, so instead of reinventing the wheel, you just added a good coat of polish to it (which is in no way a bad thing, I feel). Also I want to thank you for doing the entire elements of harmony thing right. It frustrates me to see so many authors play the "Don't worry, I wont leave you, because I'm the element of loyalty," card. It's like they don't realize that the Elements don't make up who they are, but more the Elements are bound to them BECAUSE of who they are, and they believe that the characters should throw it around like a title.
Good work, and I hope to see more from this story! :)
1443674
TYPO OBLITERATED.
Thanks for the comments. I agree there's hardly anything revolutionary going on here. If I do write more, I'll probably add something that can give this at least a hint of originality and substance. Like, I don't know, a plot or something. I have no illusions that I've written cotton candy, but I appreciate that you think it was well-spun cotton candy. :)
In paragraphs 1, 2, 5 and 7 you spell Twilight as 'Twighlight', and that almost made me stop reading, but I powered through and I'm glad I did. No one lost their wings, died, and like Somepony above me said they didn't throw around their elements like a title. Pretty much what Somepony said, but I wanna use my own sweet analogy instead of wood polish. Um...if it ain't broke...no, hmm.....OK I got nothing. Nice little cliche walking into the sunset ending, but can still continue if you wish to, and hopefully you do. Only suggestion I have is to find an editor or pre-reader.
This reminded me of the movie Hitch...I think that was the name of it....
Edit: Bah that guy beat me to it...I'll leave this up since it tell you where you did it. Plus I think the guy above me cheated since he can travel time.
1444333 and 1444395
...*facehoof* I really, really can't believe I made that mistake.
REALLY, REALLY EMBARRASSING TYPOS OBLITERATED.
This is good, TwiDash is probably my favorite Twilight ship. It's well written, and, though I guess I can't exactly call it original, I like the fanon that RD has trouble with relationships/commitment/etc. It's good, it makes things cute, and... yeah. Good work! I hope you continue!
MOAR!!!
everyone read this story and harmony fell across the world.. the end.
no really give us more this was good.
If you are looking for an editor
The vast majority of stories I edit for are TwiDash
Loved it, would love more!
I'm a sucker for good TwiDash and this didn't disappoint. I'd love to see you explore more of this. It's got a good angle: Twi coming out to an openly gay Dash, plus Dash's reluctance to pursue based on past bad experiences. Lots of these stories just have them fall into "I love you Twi! I love you RD! *kisseshappilyeverafter*" after the first date, or even before it, so it's nice to see them not taking things TOO fast. Thumbs up and a gold star for you!
Couple of minor formatting issues:
feelings for somepony who’s brain is hardwired = should be whose
straight at Twilight, conviction
burning in her eyes. = eliminate the line break after conviction
Twilight blinked. “Now?”
“Sure,” Rainbow said over her shoulder = needs paragraph break after "Now?"
That would explain my gaydar mess-up.”
Twilight chuckled. = needs paragraph break after mess-up."
1444839
I didn't think I needed an editor because I'm usually pretty spot on with mechanics, but after that 'Twighlight' thing I may just take you up on that offer. javascript:smilie('
');
The responses here have been extremely positive, so thank you everyone! I'm curious about the thumbs downs. I know there are some trolls lurking about who like to thumbs down everything they come across, but I think it'd be rather egotistical of me to assume that's all that's happening here. Anyone who didn't like it, please speak up! I know this thing's got some problems, even beyond the lack of originality. I'm rather rusty at writing, so I'm sure there's some phrasing awkwardness and pacing problems. As I said before, I got some thick skin and I really appreciate critical analysis.
1445584
Well, for the most part my editing goes along the lines of helping with pacing, dialogue, characterization and just all around helping you improve the quality of your writing.
feel free to check out my account and message some of the other people I edit for if you want a better idea of how I work.
1445549
MISTAKES OBLITER-blahblah, you get the idea.
I'd imagine a continuation of this going through those bumps of uncertainty and personal baggage. Building a relationship is hard, and physical and emotional infatuation is only step one, regardless of how long two people (or ponies) harbor those feelings. I find it rather silly in other fics when two characters claim to love each other immediately. I mean, I doubt anyone would be particularly pragmatic about how they classify their feelings for someone else, but still. It just comes across as naive or inexperienced.
1445612
I'll do that!
I like it when rainbow gets embarrasse bout her feelings and then twilight just randomly kisses her. It's just so cute!!!^_^
I like Rainbow in this.
Alright, after over forty likes and seventy favorites in less than 24 hours of posting, ya'll have twisted my arm. I've started writing a second part. Thanks for the very kind words; this is truly the nicest fandom I've ever encountered and it's rather nice to be a part of it. My life's been kinda terrible for a while now and it was so good to find something that could make me smile again. And if I can make others smile with silly little fanfics about ponies, I know I can keep my own smile going.
An excellent start/piece of fluff.
And now, because it was running through my head:
I just realized that your paragraph spacer is your username in cursive with some swirls. My mind just got fucked.
I thought it was Twilight that always thinks too much, not Rainbow Dash... Oh well, most TwiDashies have where Dash finds her smarter side anyways.
Just started the story, and already love it.
Hahaha hahahaha imagining Rainbow Dash saying gaydar is simply priceless!
“when I was a filly in flight school, I asked out a friend of mine who was straight,
whoah, it's a huge trip seeing an author you love future stories by expressing insecurity on their first fix, especially when it felt just like any other batsterpiece