• Published 18th Nov 2024
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My Little Priestess - Worship is Magic - Georg



It’s tough being the Divine Radiance. Particularly when you have Acolyte Sparkle to deal with.

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Chapter The Fourth - The Divine Catastrophe

The Book of Harmony
Chapter the Fourth - The Divine Catastrophe


And lo at this portion of the recitation of the Holy Histories there was a great calamity, striking all the records of events. Naught is known of the Return of the Darkness of Nightmares but inconsistent tales told by heretics and apostates, condemned to the eternal fire by their wicked lies. The Divine Radiance of the Sun has spoken all that needs said of this event, where her sister the Divine Radiance of the Moon and Stars was purged of the Evil Shadow of Greed and Pride, returned to the Light, and now sits at her right wing to the adoration of her worshipers, equal in all ways except stature.

~ ~ ☥ ~ ~

“Did we get all of your disciple’s notes?” asked Luna as she pushed one more thick stack of paper into the glowing stove.

“I think so.” Celestia counted the remaining boxes. “I swore all of her associates to secrecy, and promised the Divine Hatchling a bucket of gems every year to stay shut up.”

“You spoil that lizard. And your disciple,” added Luna.

“They helped free you,” pointed out Celestia. “And I may have mentioned something about a dragon bar-b-que in case anything unauthorized comes to light about the event.”

Since the stove was still full of fuel, Luna cast a long look at the giant pile of remaining notes and pulled several sheets out at random. “An entire page of iambic pentameter poetry about some sort of river serpent. Two full pages detailing the speech she made to bring her disciples to a fervent state of belief in order to use the Elements of Harmony.” Luna turned the paper over with a frown before consigning it to the flames. “I wonder what really happened.”

~ ~ ☥ ~ ~

And lo, the Faithful Disciple of Celestia, Initiate Sparkle, did triumph over the Six Trials in the Forest of Everfree. Upon setting hoof in the Ancient Castle of Radiant Dawn and Resplendent Dusk, she and her companions were enlightened to the remnants of the Relics of Harmonious Worship, and she did retire from her companions to meditate upon their nature for a time.

~ ~ ☥ ~ ~

“They’re just rocks, darling.” Rarity nudged one of the dusty spheres with one hoof.

Holy rocks,” breathed Twilight. “Can you not feel the divine power radiating from the glorious relics of Her Divine Radiance? Does not their mere presence cause you to—”

“Look, Twi,” said Applejack. “It’s been a long trip here through the woods, and I gotta hit the can.”

“Me too,” said Rainbow Dash.

“That makes three of us,” said Pinkie. “We’ll just leave you here with your rocks, Twilight—”

”Relics!”

“Um, right,” said Pinkie, backing up slowly.

“I hope there’s a bathroom here,” said Fluttershy.

Rarity paused at the doorway, obviously struggling to find some polite words for the frazzled unicorn who was trying to hold all five spherical stones in one place. “They’re very nice rocks, darling. Quite symmetrical.”

She slipped out the door during the resulting silence, following her new friends in search of a proper lavatory.

~ ~ ☥ ~ ~

The gathering of worshipers tried their best to raise the Faithful Disciple’s spirits and allow her to commune with the Divine Radience’s wisdom, but great was her anguish, and she remained in deep consultation for many hours. Despite the adversity facing them, the humble Initiate Sparkle remained inconsolate during her meditation, never wavering in her determination to bring the Light into the Darkness and confront the evil which had engulfed the Nightmare.

~ ~ ☥ ~ ~

“Twilight?” Applejack knocked on the dusty door while the rest of the ponies gathered outside tried to look in the other direction. “You’all need any help in there.”

“I’m meditating,” came Twilight’s voice from inside. There was a distinct pause, and she added, “Can you see if there is any toilet paper out there?”

“There’s some rocks—” said Pinkie Pie.

Relics!

“No, they’re just rocks,” continued Pinkie.

There was a long pause.

“Well… I suppose.”

~ ~ ☥ ~ ~

Long was her vigil, until it was time to face the Shadow of Darkness who is also called Nightmare with all the courage she had gathered from her meditations as well as the magic she had learned under the tutelage of the Divine Radiance.

~ ~ ☥ ~ ~

“Pick a card, any card.” Twilight Sparkle levitated a deck of playing cards in the direction of the glowering darkness looming across the ancient throne room and whispered over her shoulder, “Can’t you get that fire exit open?”

“It’s locked,” whispered Rarity, “and I can’t pick it. Who locks a fire door?”

“Maybe if we smacked it with this rock,” whispered Pinkie Pie.

“Relic!” hissed Twilight.

“If we can’t get them to work, they’re rocks,” countered Rainbow Dash. “What else can we do with them?”

“Keep stalling,” whispered Applejack. “Maybe you should try speechafying like you did back in Ponyville.”

“Right.” Twilight dropped the cards, which had started to catch on fire anyway, and announced in a loud voice, “You see, Nightmare Darkness, sworn enemy of the Divine Radiance, historical figure of great importance who was not mentioned in any of the Books of Radiance that I was permitted to peruse, even though I was the student of Her Radiance and should have been informed—”

“Twilight!” hissed Fluttershy. “Focus!”

“Oh, yes.” Initiate Sparkle struck a heroic pose, or at least one she had seen in a book at one time and which did not involve strange convulsions or twisting. “When these rocks—”

“You said they were relics,” whispered Rainbow Dash.

“Relics! When these Relics are brought together, a ‘spark’ happens. We become… a congregation!”

“I thought that was a minyan.” said Pinkie Pie.

Rainbow Dash placed one hoof in the middle of her forehead and said, “Wrong religion, Pinkie.”

“And wrong gender,” added Rarity.

“Plus we’re four short, anyway,” said Applejack.

“Shhh!!” hissed Twilight. “I think they’re starting to glow.”

“I lit the fuse on that one,” said Pinkie. “You should probably throw it now.”

~ ~ ☥ ~ ~

Thus did the Faithful Disciple unbind the powers of the Elements of Harmonious Worship with the help of her acolytes, who embodied the merits of the Divine Radiance with such fervor that they banished the Shadow of Darkness which had bound the Radiance of the Moon and Stars since time immemorial.

The reunion of the Divine Sisters was a time of great joy, and they did spread their love and appreciation upon the nearby town of Faithful Worshipers. As beholding to her station, the Goddess of the Sun and Moon did descend into Ponyville seated upon a golden chariot with her sister at her side. Once she had rested from her journey, she addressed the multitude gathered to hear her wisdom and proclaimed, “This is my Sister, who was taken from me, and now has been returned. Rejoice, for once again Equestria is reunited under our Divine Wisdom. Behold, the Goddess Luna, Radiance of the Moon and Stars!

And the assembled ponies cheered with great enthusiasm, for they shared in the joy of the Divine Sisters. And there was much rejoicing.

~ ~ ☥ ~ ~

The silence was so thick, even the chirping of a cricket in the back of the crowd seemed ear-shattering, or at least until one of the assembled ponies quietly put a hoof down on it. Prioress Mare stepped forward, and after the prescribed placing of her forehead upon bare earth seven times, she addressed Goddess Celestia with a simple question.

“What?”

“I said she’s my sister,” snapped Celestia. “Well?”

A great number of Books of Radiance were removed for discreet inspection out in the crowd, including one by Prioress Mare, who checked the index twice before looking back up at Celestia as if she had a question she really didn’t want to ask.

“There’s going to be a revised edition,” said Celestia rather curtly. “Now make with the celebration.”

~ ~ ☥ ~ ~

Thus was the Era of Peace introduced to the lands as the Divine Sisters returned to their thrones… Well, throne since they shared it on shifts, but a second throne had been ordered constructed from the finest materials available and was soon to be delivered. The Faithful Disciple and the Blessed Hatchling didst remain in the sacred town to proclaim the glory of the reunited Sisters of Radiance to all who were drawn to their Sacred Tree of Knowledge and Silent Meditation.
(*) Open 9-9 weekdays, 10-5 on weekends. Occasionally closed due to religious observations and morning meditations. Knowledge checked out is due in two weeks with significant penalties for careless behavior or damage to the Sacred Vessels.

Great was the celebration in the town as their new Caretaker of Knowledge took her position, providing hope to the downtrodden and the weak. With her new friends, she traveled to distant lands at the direction of the Divine Sisters, the Radiance of the Sun and the Radiance of the Moon and Stars, bringing light and wisdom to all.

So it is written.

~ ~ ☥ ~ ~

“Do you think she’s gonna make another break for it?” asked Rainbow Dash as the group trotted along the road.

Applejack shrugged. “Don’t really matter. She’s slow enough we’ve been able to catch her every time. Asides, the Sisters would just send her packing back here if she violates the restraining order and makes it up the mountain again. We’re stuck with her. Praise the Radiance. Radiances.”

“Amen,” said Pinkie Pie. “Unless there’s a second Divine Revelation, or an Apocrypha.”