Twilight Sparkle is a scientist first and foremost. If it exists it can be explained using science and math, she knows it.
Magic will have to drag her kicking and screaming into believing in it. A promise it is willing to keep.
Chapters (2)
- Member Since 19th Feb, 2023
- offline last seen 5 hours ago
RedHoodie21
I write overblown, purple, self indulgent prose, so what?
RedHoodie21
Joined 19th Feb, 2023 ·
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A fascinating take on both Sunset and my favorite pairing... though it doesn't appear to deliver on the promise of the chapter title. Certainly not in any way that Twilight will admit. But I always love seeing these two dorks.
I will say that your description of the dinner sometimes crosses into less than appealing language. River algae and yeast blooms aren't the most appetizing concepts to bring to the reader's mind. Still, delightful work overall. Thank you for it. I hope you come back to this particular Sunset and Twilight. (If nothing else, I may steal that idea of Sunset getting caught eating weeds...)
This AU(?) tale lets the characterizations of Twi and Sunset shine!
12021716
haha yeah i thought about changing the title more than once but i liked it too much to switch it lol
plus unique metaphors are kinda my thing! personally i love the smell of yeast blooming but im a baker at heart haha thanks for reading!!!
12021718
omggg thank you so much!!!! :]
"Hahah silly Sunset, you're not a demon! Cuddle time now."
Not sure where it started, but towards the end the paragraphs were 50+% present tense.
Good characterization and cute interaction, tho.
reading the comments makes me know if its sci-twi x sunset so i am not reading but giving it a like so sci-twi x sunset fans can find this
12022944
This is the correct response to seeing something you know you won't like.
oh my god, i want to absorb your writing style into my brain. this is the most beautiful, well-written fic i've seen on this site!! the start of this fic is so strong it left me in awe. i literally had to sit back and reread a few times!
i also adore how you characterized both of them (i actually had to send a few screenshots to my girlfriend in shock, because the way you wrote these two is so real that it sounded like how me and her act!!!). well-written sapphic bliss in fics will always make me happy, and god if this isn't well-written sapphic bliss. beautifully done!! i hope maybe someday maybe we can see the drama thatd unfold from sunset really telling twi what she is. this version of them having a "cliche secret reveal and making up later" arc would be so sweet.
12023315
WAUGHHH THIS IS RHE NICEST COMMENT EVER!!!! THANK YOU SO MUCH AUGH
Occasionally I am guilty of multitasking while reading FiMFics. Even worse, when a story hooks me on my first read-through and I need to know what happens next, I confess that I sometimes stoop to skimming. A despicable habit, I know.
While reading this fic, I had to remind myself several times to stop skimming to savor your startlingly well-written prose. Your writing style is among the most impressive I have encountered on this site over the last decade. Few others try to make every sentence a painting worth framing.
Yet I unfortunately agree with FiMFiction's resident omnipresent being ( 12021716 ) that your title overpromised. You cut the story off right at the good part!
In a timeline where Twilight "Monomania" Sparkle spends her life scientifically discovering zero supernatural beings, during the peak of her obsession with explaining the few hints of exceptions existing, I expect a sudden revelation that (a) her worldview is fundamentally wrong and (b) her girlfriend knows why to make Twilight promptly Freak The Fuck Out! I wanted to see Sci-Twi blast Sunset with questions at a rate rivaling submachine guns'! Then I wanted to see Sunset confidently deflect them all until Twilight's bottomless ammunition stock runs out!
I also love adorably sweet sapphic love stories, so ultimately I still enjoyed this one. But I'd love even more if you wrote another chapter showing us which stages of grief Sci-Twi speedruns before accepting the existence of magic.
it’s been a while since i’ve opened this site and seen a masterpiece, so im glad that’s this story!
Id pay (metaphorically at this time) to see more of these two in this world you've built because the way you wrote them is so adorable. I especially like how you've portrayed sunset. It's a really good composition
I wonder how things go once Twilight has no choice but to accept that Sunset was indeed telling the truth about magic.
This is a really nice short story. It tickles my brain in that way that only good writing can.
eagerly awaiting the sequel where twilight finds out shes a demon and still wants cuddles.
i.postimg.cc/KcHVdhKy/twilight-has-needs.png
I mean. If the writhing mass of flesh and death is already your girlfriend, why not love her back?
I love myself some kinky twilight goodness lol. They're so precious even when Sunset reveals her truest most writhing form. "You still love me despite me being a mass of flesh inside right"
"I love you more because you're a mass of flesh inside"
"What"
"What"
God I love this lol. Really damn fun. exited for whats next!
Before the Picture at the end, i was tempted to write Elias
12061315
Elias who? :]
12061306
hehe twi just learned something about herself
A truly outstanding follow-up, especially Velvet being incredibly chill about the whole thing. (Also, I do have to wonder how Sunset first felt about this form. Going by that comment about her cutie mark, she did used to be a unicorn.)
Thank you for this.
12061385
well there was definitely a,… learninf curve lets say haha
This is the definition of unique when it comes to Sunset's...
Wow, I can't even call it her demon form this time around!
12061401
gotta keep yall on your toes >:3
12061316
https://ancientmagusbride.fandom.com/wiki/Elias_Ainsworth
This line goes hard af
nightmare fey chimera pussy got this gay little nerd acting uuuuup, we love to see it.
Your writing is as evocative as ever, as someone who’s caught sleep paralysis a couple times the first part really got me.
12061594
HEHE THANKS JOLENE :]]]
"Horrors beyond all mortal comprehension and knowledge? More like WIFE beyond all mortal comprehension and knowledge!"
12061659
you get it
sunset is SO wife material, amiright twilight
So....is this what happened when this Sunset came through their mirror? The spell barfed and had no clue what to do with her, so she became amalgamated into this form?
How this happened is as interesting as to where they go from here.
Excellent story and a lot of fun!
12062044
im glad you liked it! i have some thoughts on how this occurred, but know that a you really shouldn’t mix mommy issues with an unstable portal topped with an unhealthy dash of draconequus goading 😉
I have some mixed feelings after rereading the first chapter then this. You are a valiant descriptor! But there are a lot of them! But the story wouldn't be the same without all of them.
It was actually really hard to picture Sunset as she was being described, even trying to reread some of it. Hard to concisely and accurately describe is part of how she would be described though.
(I can't tell if it's just me, but the image in the AN says Upstream error 404 Not Found for me so its further unclear for me)
The story was neat though, lots of things being described was still part of what worked when they could be like contrasting from describing the normal of the night to describing the monsters of the night / their coming daytimes.
12062357
mhm! it is true there is a LOT of description this chapter, but thats the point, its meant to be confusing and unknowable, even twilight cannot wrap her head around what she’s seeing, i think perhaps i did go a bit overboard and could have nipped from areas sooner, but you’re right, it wouldn’t have been the same with out them :)
Wow. That was some eloquent word choice descriptions, some of the best I've seen in a while. The back and forth dialogue between these two was great. Well done.
There is definitely a lot going on here and I have to admit I had to read the first part twice because is was confusing. That may have been intentional. The scenes with the banter back and forth between the two girls was absolutely wonderful and like many I am wondering how she ended up in such a state.
12068902
yup! the beginning was wirtten to be discombobulating to the reader, twilight is witnessing something in a half-alseep state, influenced by magic, something she doesn’t believe in, and by morning is nothing more than a hazy memory, it’s a lot all at once and i wanted that to influence the narration :)
im glad you liked my banter! ive always trying to improve my dialogue so im glad its coming across