On a typically quiet day at Sweet Apple Acres, Big Mac tells Applejack he's thinking of having a vasectomy. This causes no friction between the pair at all, of course.
Chapters (1)
- Member Since 3rd Aug, 2014
- online
deadpansnarker
Not your average writer. A frisson above average, in fact.
deadpansnarker
Joined 3rd Aug, 2014 ·
Online
Also LikedSimilarAuthor
- deadpansnarker · 1.9k words · 72 6 · 1.4k views
- gloamish · 1000 words · 31 3 · 567 views
- deadpansnarker · 1000 words · 30 0 · 549 views
Featured In10
The Writers' Group58,220 stories ·9,533 members
One-Shots19,457 stories ·2,408 members
Applejack2,205 stories ·1,816 members
- Big Mac's Stories335 stories ·304 members
Comedy4,906 stories ·1,338 members
- Applejack is Best Pony316 stories ·341 members
Completed Story Compendium21,820 stories ·1,771 members
The Shameless Self-Promotion Bureau51,214 stories ·5,614 members
Join our SubscribeStar to remove these adverts!
Join our SubscribeStar to remove these adverts!
Stats
Page generated in 0.085 seconds
Total duration
941 users online
1,213,675 hits today, 1,482,283 yesterday
FIMFiction
My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic Fanfiction
Designed and coded by knighty & Xaquseg - © 2011-2025
Follow & Support Us
Support us
SubStar
Chat!
Discord
Follow us
Twitter
MLP: Friendship is Magic® - © 2025 Hasbro Inc.®
Fimfiction is in no way affiliated with or endorsed by Hasbro Inc.®
How does he get snip snip down there if there’s nothing to snip?
12020109
There is... the show just blurs it out. Damn puritanical censors!!
Very alarming to compare a vasectomy to gelding. Those are VERY different procedures. Only one is reversible.
12020114
Meh, I needed a snappy title... and I got one. Let's just say, in this world the term is applied somewhat differently.
That ending...
Hilarious.
Um, Mac, I don't want to be that guy, but... that thing will do nothing to help with the urges. In fact, many people do it because they want to, um... capitalize on those urges without consequences
.
"Tha's the neat thin': Ah don't."
"YAH WHAT?!"
Aww. They don't actually get gelded?
And here I was hoping they'd be like yours truly.
Harumph.
12020203
...So what do I call you then? Mr Eunich?
12020194
(Balls? Twist? Sounds painful.) 
It's too early for a twist like that...
12020179
...Well I'm not telling him. You gor right ahead, though.
12020153
If you're gonna end on a punchline, make it a good one. Hope others agreed!
12020253
finger guns
Thats me! Daelyx Len Auphydas, purity zealot and cute eunuch extraordinaire, at your service!
surprisingly few stories with geldings considering thats a normal horse thing...Wow, this was eerily similar to when I told my family that I was going to get a vasectomy. Even the dialogue was spot-on. It was all "You'll change your mind down the road, and it will be too late" and "who will carry on the family name?" and "I wanted to be a grandmother." I even did the same thing that Mac did in the story. I went to the hospital for the procedure, and on the way I saw a mother and father with their beautiful little baby. The difference was that the baby I saw was screaming bloody murder as its parents desperately tried to calm it in the middle of a crowd that looked sideways at them and tried to inconspicuously stay as far away as possible. I laughed out loud, said, "suckers," and got the job done. I tell you, nothing puts parenthood into perspective the way that other people's kids do.
12020114
Neither is reversible. Vasectomies are only partially reversible, and get less so as time progresses.
12020522
Still way more reversible than having the testicles removed entirely.
Upsie...
Fuck bro lmao
Applejack did him dirty.