She could only think about the prophetic opening joke her mom had made at the ceremony

With the amount of pregnant sex in this universe it was bound to happen eventually I was half expecting it every time, actually.

Love the names of the foals. I can only imagine where you got them from.

I don't think anyone would blame you if you wanted to publish this epilogue as a separate sequel. I think it definitely has the meat to stand on its own and gives an excellent conclusion for Flurry Heart.

This story was definitely a lot better than the first, though I feel like the adult's actions were a little too eager (both in the first and this one) that it makes me wonder whether they have the foals' best interest in mind, or if the CMC just made it up. But hey, porn logic, so I'm not complaining.

I do agree with the rest, that it takes some suspension of disbelief to accept that they wouldn't just have polyamorous relationships outside of each other.

Overall, that was a pretty fun read, sans a few punctuation errors with misplaced quotations. I'll look forward to what you come up with next.

12052480
Agreed. Both about the epilogue needing to be it's own story and the polyamory needing to be explored.

Lots of names not capitalized.

12139527
Those aren't names, they're parts of the day.

12139912

“They're twins and they have fourteen foals,” explained cadence.

Moving along efficiently, she counted her steps and felt the walls similarly to how pound had done.

“What about your cutie marks?” railed flurry “What is that about?”

There's plenty more. Not a big deal, just gotta read over it again.