• Member Since 13th Nov, 2011
  • offline last seen Yesterday

knightcommander


T

Apple Bloom is having a normal day at Ponyville High; taking notes, listening to boring lectures, dodging doofus jocks and bullies like Diamond Tiara... that is, until she finds a note on her locker from someone she didn't think she would be seeing again for a long time.

Silver Spoon, the Cutie Mark Crusaders former bully alongside Diamond Tiara, has returned to Ponyville and invited them to attend her upcoming birthday party. But why? Follow the Crusaders and their friend as they prepare for the day, while reminiscing on the events, good and bad, that brought them to this point.

They'll soon find that gold isn't the only thing that can remain untarnished.

Chapters (1)
Comments ( 25 )

Straightforward but nice. I'm always a sucker for a Silver Spoon redemption, I've long found her to be quite an interesting character. And it's also always nice to see an "X years in the future and things are going well for everypony" story, a good counterbalance to the apocalyptic stuff. :)

Um...by strict definition, if a story is complete, it can't be incomplete.

Not bad, small and happy with forgiveness and a change of heart as the theme.

You seem to have a bad habit of "telling, not showing". Telling is "She said." "She smiled." "(Object performing the action) (Single action) (Punctuation mark)"

Showing can be as simple as "She grinned in delight at the remark" or as complex as "Her entire form quaked and tears streamed down the sides of her muzzle as the memories of her horrible past, of the things she had done, came back to haunt her."...and then some but that's not the point. It takes a few extra words to do, but it allow similar actions to be described with as many or as few nuances explained as you want and makes the story more interesting to read as we try to interpret Who, What, and more importantly Why someone is performing an action. Three cases of someone "Smiling" becomes a case of amused grinning (why that silly boy), a case of weary happiness (Maybe things will be better), and a case of contentment (Everything is right in the world).

A quick challenge to try and help you out, Write a one shot that does not contain the word "Said", "Smile (Smiled, Smiling)", "Cry (Cried, Crying)", or "Laugh (Laughed, Laughing)" unless it is a word being said by a character.

The theme can be what you like but my own suggestion would be a slightly meta-ish fic about a pony who challenges another pony to the exact same challenge so you can make fun of the nerve of some random critic who hasn't written any real successful stories himself but sees fit to think he knows exactly how to fix other's writing problems. I can see it already, it would be a riot!

A very, very great read, one that I feel I'm am honored to be a part of, I seriously love the CMC and the fact that you added Dinky or metioned Babs Seed made me want to smile then cry in joy....oh for a guy but hey, th each their own.

Shit, I had a very good read tonight, thank you, seriously, I love Sliver Spoon and for a bit I sensed some Sliver/Scootaloo romance but I could be wrong, a bit odd not seeing any of the Mane Six save Dash and Applejack by that's to be expected, though the name Jet Stream sounds familer....huh:rainbowhuh:

Anyway, this was a CMC story and I'm very glad to have read such and even though I love it with all my heart, something that was not or did not end in romance.

I'll do what I can to spread the word of this story that seriously deserves such an honor:twilightsmile:

Here's to many more CMC (with Dinky Doo being a member) stories to be brought to the site, eh?:yay:

i quite enjoyed the story, as you can tell i'm a big Silver spoon fan. the only thing i think could have made this better is DT showing up and getting knocked out by SS herself.

Since the story was tagged as incomplete, I was hoping for a 20 chapter epic with at least 10k words per chapter. Slightly disappointed. Trying a bit to hard at the end there as well. Also, this really does not need the sex tag, and removing it might get you more readers.

1819664

Derp, fixed that little mistake, I meant to tag it as complete.

Also the tag was for some dirty humor used by Scootaloo, tis all.

:ajsmug: Me gusta. Great job on the dialogue. Yeh got a knack for it.

1819190 Already took care of that

Will there be a sequel? This is an excellent story, keep up the good work.

1838143

There will be other stories like this one in the future.

This is definitely going into my top 5 Favorites for the CMC. I loved the way Silver Spoon wasn't treated like a protagonist at every turn, if at all during the memories of the CMC and friends. I'll definitely will be reading any sequels you write to this. Maybe you can write Babs Seed into one of this story's sequels? That'd be great!

Comment posted by Shadow Star deleted Jul 9th, 2013

I wish the Canon Show do this to Silver Spoon she is not that bad..... and Diamond Tiara can go to Tartarus.

The best kind of Slice of Life story... one that doesn't bother with plot or suspense, and just shows life in Ponyville.:scootangel:

Meanwhile, DT is still a stuck-up bitch.

"Harass another filly again and your going to lose those in an 'accident' with molten silver!":pinkiehappy:

Did anypony think THIS when she said that?
"I Love silverrrrrrrrr.. the texture of it, the taste of it, the shmell of it! I love silver so much that I lost my gentitalia in an unfortuanate shmelting accident.":trollestia:

I love Silver that much.. almost..:yay:

3486619
If you were the only one who thought that, I'll be flabbergasted :rainbowderp:

Awesome story. :rainbowdetermined2:

knightcommander,

This story almost overwhelmed me! It was just so beautiful. And it takes **a lot** to get me to shed tears (especially happy ones) while reading. And this story hit me square between the eyes!

You, my friend, are a natural! Job well-done!

Login or register to comment