Deadpool Vs. Equestria
Issue #15
Previously on Deadpool Vs Equestria...
____________________________________________________
Deadpool and Pinkie landed on concrete. Deadpool looked around, and saw he was in a very familiar place. New York City. And he still had his fingers and toes back.
"YES!" Deadpool cried out in triumph. "I'm home, and I'm still human! In your FACE, Deathelocke!"
I'm sad now...
"This is New York City?" Pinkie said, while Deadpool, still admiring his city, was not that bothered with looking at her.
"Yeah, pretty much." Deadpool replied.
"Looks like Manehattan." She commented.
"Well, this is called Manhattan, so... yeah." Deadpool said, shrugging.
"Huh. Well, that's new." Pinkie said.
"Yes, whatever you're looking at is probably new, because this is Earth, and we use our hands. Horses are modes of transport." Deadpool explained, while feeling the ground, then reaching his arm down a sewer manhole.
"I heard they were used for sinister purposes on a land called '4chan.' I hear Discord created it."
"That image is clogging up space, Author." Deadpool commented.
Well, I thought it was funny.
"Well it's not." He retorted.
...
"IT'S NOT!"
Fine. Turn around.
"I will not turn around until I get on with the story." Deadpool said. "Now, Pinkie, what shall we say to the weirdoes walking around this city, because they'll find it weird whe- Huh. Well, that's new." He mused, upon turning around.
It appears Pinkie Pie has become Human Pinkie Pie. With frizzy hair, no tail, a purple T-shirt, jeans and stylish shoes.
"Hi!" Pinkie said, waving her hand, then admiring it for a second.
"..."
"Hello!" Pinkie tried.
"..."
"Greetings?"
"..."
"Good morning, jolly good fellow, indubitably..." Pinkie was getting kind of annoyed at his unresponsiveness.
{Damnit, now the shipping is inevitable.}
Not if I have anything to say about it.
[You have nothing to say about it.]
That's not true, I have one thing to say about that.
[Which is, what exactly?]
FFFFFFFFFUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU-
{Deadpool regained his senses as the Author had a nervous breakdown.}
"Huh? Oh. Right. Well. Things are easier now," Deadpool said, "Now you fit in a bit easier... we might wanna straighten up your hair, though."
"I don't have any hair, except my mane." Pinkie replied.
"Which we call hair." Deadpool explained.
"Ooohhh, right," Pinkie understood. "Well, it's really difficult to get my ma- err, hair straightened. I tried it before going to the Grand Galloping Gala, just to see if it'd work, and I just didn't agree with it!"
"What's wrong with it?"
[Yeah, I bet she'd look hotter with straight hair. Most girls do.]
{ -.0 }
[But it's possible... we're both human.]
{That doesn't make her any more gettable than before. Now go back to fantasizing about human Rainbow Dash.}
[The other one does that, not me.]
{Shishkebab}
[Okay]
"Nothing. It just doesn't work." Pinkie said, shrugging. "So, where next?"
"Well, we should make a stop at my apartment, and then figure out what to show you in this place." Deadpool suggested.
"Sounds fun! I wonder if transition cuts work this time!"
*Two hours later*
Deadpool and Pinkie were walking along a street. Deadpool was wearing a WWE shirt, patriotic pants with the U.S.A flag all over them, and a baseball cap over his costume. Pinkie decided to wear what she was wearing when she first appeared on Earth, along with a parka.
"Are we going to watch wrestling or something?" Deadpool said, looking at his shirt, "I know it's a cliché joke, but I honestly do not remember buying this... at all."
"And I don't remember how I got into these clothes," Pinkie responded, "Which reminds me, why is everybody here wearing clothes? Usually clothes back home are for fashion."
"Well, there's a little thing called, er, Anti-Nudism," Deadpool explained. "Usually, people are discomforted when one's bare self is presented to everyone else. Even if they're only wearing underpants. Occasionally, we get the uncommon streaker, but that's kinda weird, and it's freaking cold without clothes.
"Oh, right," Pinkie said, sort of understanding, "It is kinda chilly. Do these humans at least party?"
"Of course they do. But most of them are after hours, really loud, and so out of hand that bad things happen, and they have to call the police in."
"Well, maybe I should organize a party here, Pinkie Pie style!"
"Yeah... I'm gonna call you something else..." Deadpool said, "There's a lotta bronies who'll think either that you're crazy or that they're crazy since they'll obviously think they're in a fan-fiction where human Pinkie Pie goes to planet Earth."
"Okie dokie!" Pinkie said, "Call me... Andrea Libman!"
{Uhm.}
"Or err... what are you, a superhero?" Pinkie asked.
"No. Mercenary. Frequent anti-hero. I said that." Deadpool explained.
"Well... since I can't think up a human name... besides that one, call me... Lady Deadpool, your sidekick!"
"We already have a Lady Deadpool from another dimension... and our comic was cancelled. STOP BRINGING UP BAD MEMORIES." Deadpool spontaneously yelled.
"What about... Surprise?" Pinkie asked.
[Can you fly?]
{No, she can't.}
[Then she can never be Surprise.]
Give Ponky time, yellow box. Or at least other fanfic writers some time to give him some time.
"It'll do." Deadpool said, shrugging.
*Thwip*
The WWE logo of Deadpool's shirt was now covered in webbing. Pinkie looked at it curiously.
"Expect a fight scene in three, tw-"
*Thwip Thwip*
Two lines of webbing were now attached to Deadpool. He felt the webs being tugged, and as he looked into the distance, he saw a familiar spandex-wearing hero aiming a double kick towards him.
"One." Deadpool finished, before being kicked to the ground by Spider-Man.
"I wasn't even doing anything bad." Deadpool complained on the ground, before standing up.
"Doesn't matter, Nick Fury thinks you were at some secret meeting that S.H.I.E.L.D found out about." Spider-Man said back.
"Er. Why was I never informed of this?" Deadpool asked.
"Well, that's what I'm here to find about, Deadpool," Spider-Man said, before looking to Pinkie. "You might wanna step outta the way, ma'am."
"I might, but I don't!" Pinkie replied with a grin on her face.
"...Err... right. Seriously, you might get hurt." He said, trying to reason with her.
"I might, but I might not! Now, you two have a little fight scene, and I'll go bring some popcorn!"
Spider-Man was dumbfounded. He looked to Deadpool.
"Is she your sister from crazy-town or something? Her weird speaking resonating in my brain reminds me of you. Except less gravelly."
"I went dimension-hopping, I guess..." Deadpool said, shrugging. "Remember that comic series where I had a team of me's from other dimensions?"
"No." Spider-Man replied, shaking his head.
"Well... it's kinda like that," Deadpool said, "Which is probably also why you thought I was at that swap meet."
"Villain meet." Spidey corrected.
"Whatever, I never liked fleas." Deadpool retorted.
"I got the popcorn!" Pinkie says, now holding two boxes of popcorn, with her arms wrapped around them. "Am I holding these right?"
"I get the feeling you're lying, Deadpool." Spider-Man accused.
"I get the feeling you're voiced by Drake Bell who spoofed you in Superhero Movie, Spider-Man." Deadpool accused. "Seriously, though, good series so far, you remind me of me."
Pinkie started walking around, asking people if they had CD players with them.
"And who is that?" Spider-Man asked, pointing to her.
"Oh, her?" Deadpool began, "That's Andrea Libman."
"Doesn't look like Andrea Libman."
"But how do you know Andrea Libman?"
"She's the- she was on X-Files." Spider-Man said uncertainly.
"..."
"..."
"..."
"..."
"...I'll let it slide, because I recently found out Weasel was one of you fellas. That there is the human Pinkie Pie."
"...Er. What?" Spidey was confused, mostly by how Deadpool knew of the colourful magical things he (as Peter Parker) searched on occasionally (Blame goes to Flash Thompson), but also how he managed to get one of the characters from that show to here.
"I blame Weasel." Deadpool said. "And Author, for thinking this thing up."
{Suddenly, Pinkie Pie.}
"Hi, Featherweight! I didn't know you found your way here too!" Pinkie said to Spidey.
Spidey looked as if he was about to faint from this. Deadpool, deciding Spidey had lost enough manliness points, decided to let him keep his reputation as Spider-Man, instead of Spider-Boy, and promptly punched him in the face so he fell unconscious faster.
"To be continued." Deadpool said.
But I was enjoying writing this!
-----
To be continued... in the next issue... ffggh.
{I know what'll cheer you up.}
*Has left the room by now*
{Lulz}
i didnt notice till i finished but i read all of spidey's lines and about half of yellow box's in Rorschach's voice.
(in case you never saw watchman)
[youtube=ARDhJ2dpuYU]
this always makes me laugh
1688836 I read myself in a voice like Rorschach's too. Except it's really me doing an impression of Cry.
(If you haven't watched this person on YouTube,)
What always makes you laugh? This fic, or Rorschach?
1688864
BOTH!!!!!!111ONE
1688924 Good thing I'm still good at comedy.
I've thought that slowly this fic has become less funny over time. (Seemingly getting into a comedy rut)
With this chapter the Hilarity has been doubled!
i like...
comment shall be continued next chapter
1689151 Oh. Thank Flutters, my career that I am not being paid for was almost over. I'll be sure to drag Earth adventures on a little.
1689250 DAMN CLIFFHANGERS!
1690251 wut u get
1690251
I'm sorry I didn't mean to sound like a nag. (That was sarcasm right? It's hard to tell when it's text) Jeez now I feel like a mean person for voicing my opinion.
As a random question... is Deadpool going to die at all? He has gone an awful long time without being killed.
Seriously he dies so much it's not even funny. (by not funny I mean extremely Hilarious)
1659847
That's funny, I didn't get a notification for your response.
1. It's called "Deadpool in Equestria" The concept is cool but it doesn't make sense most of the time and some characters like Discord are just horribly ooc. Again it has its good but there's alot of bad too. The Deadpool Pinkie relationship is way too forced and is put in as more of an afterthought. (your description of it sounds familiar. I read it a long time ago and I also tried to erase it from my brain so I don't remember the specifics)
2. "It must be Tuesday" is a fallout/in equestria fic. I just meant that it's one of my favorite fics ever... of all time. (nothing against you)
3. Sometimes I talk way too much to the point of major annoyance. so if you think I'm blabbing incoherently please tell me.
1691825 1. I think I searched for Deadpool fics and found that one... I honestly do not know though... I didn't think they were terrible, but they weren't good, so I decided to take it upon myself to make everything better. Except an Awesome Dude, in 1 out of 7 billion chances, had the same idea. I wholeheartedly agree his idea was way better than mine, so I'm absolutely fine with that. And he made another story that has Deadpool in it as one out of five other characters. If you're interested, Here's the one mostly about Deadpool, with Pinkie Pie, and here's the one that has Deadpool as one of the characters. The second one is rated mature, so you'll have to turn on the View Mature thingy. It's not too bad though.
2. Ah, I see. I don't really read those. And it's fine. As long as I've put something somewhere where it can have recognition, that's fine. ...Except for a story I posted some time ago. It's gone now.
3. It is fine. I like to talk.
1694505
I just thought that I had offended and/or pissed you off with my other comment. I really like to get along with everypo...body (It's seriously infecting my brain) but I have a knack for getting everyone annoyed with me. So I was just afraid that you might have hated me.
EDIT:
To each his own.
1694573 Ah see... I don't usually get annoyed at text... does this problem usually happen in real life, or both real life and the internet? Because so far, I don't see a problem.
1691693 Huh. Didn't see this comment.
If I get to a violent battle... maybe. But I have no idea when that will be. And yes. His deaths are high-larious.
1694614
Mostly real life. My brand of humor is not appreciated by most, and I even annoy myself somehow.
The more I think about it... I think I'm a Brony because it relieves my feelings of self hate.
(I'm seriously about to go on an angsty explanatory rant so I think I should stop now... unless you actually want to hear that.)
smashbros.com/en_us/gamemode/various/images/various29/various29_080303a-l.jpg
1694759
It'll take me a while to write down all of my thoughts AND make it coherent.
1694800 Alrighty then. That's fine.
1694815
Ok where to begin...
I have a hard time saying my thoughts because I feel that they aren't worth listening to. probably because most of the time when I do most peolpe respond in a negative manner. Out of all the people I know I think I hate myself the most. (Not in a "depressed" but more of a "What the hell is wrong with you" kind of way.) I don't even really know what my opinion is because I doubt wether or not I'm sensationalizing it. Homosexuality really disgusts (and Scares?) me (**I have a legitimate reason/ I probably have an obsession with innuendo because of that bad experience) and somehow people found out and tried to accuse me of being gay just to screw with me. (maybe I'm just afraid of being called gay?)
(**No nothing really serious happened but regardless I'm still mentally scarred for life.)
I really like the Brony community because they have the morales that are the foundation of Christianity, love and tolerence. which alot of Christians I know don't seem to understand. (No I'm not mocking Christians, I'm Christian myself. I also think I'm the worst one ever but that's beside the point)
I'm like a combination of Pinkie/Fluttershy/Rainbow because, I Seem happy on the outside but am actually disappointed in myself and feel that anyone could have done better, am super shy can't express my thoughts and when I do I usually do it wrong, and I seem confident on the outside but I actually feel that my life is a lie. (mostly because the enlistment process to get into the U.S. Air Force is really long and I haven't gotten a job since I've graduated. Though I did succeed in getting in the Military.)
I really don't trust people to be close anymore because my "friends" in middle school turned on me and became the bullies we had tried to oppose. (Irony?)
(more Irony) My best friend from middleschool thinks I'm gay. I told him he was like a brother to me and even though I have homophobia it came out REALLY gay. (Have you watched the T.V. show scrubs? If you have imagine the J.D. and Turk relationship except way less gay.
I keep my emotions so bottled up that even I don't know what I'm feeling half of the time. I used to blow up at people but now I all of my bad feelings get pent up and make me ache emotionally.
I'd tell someone like my mother things like this but I know she wouldn't understand. (I used to have some gay friends and they said they had issues with their parents because of judging their lifestyle. by the way that's unrelated to my issues but it's related to the next thing) People like my mom annoy me the most. They preach love and tolerence (like bronies) but love to complain about how bad you are and focuse on that rather than try to be uplifting.
*sigh* I don't know what it is but the more time I spend on this site the more I say what I think.
I am going to post it now because if I write any longer I'll regret what I typed and erase it all.
*Add Comment*
1695098 Alright then. Well, I can see where you're coming from with that. I recognize the sort of people who do that sort of screwing. The best way I described them was 'idiots.' Even if they weren't stupid. Idiots was all I had to say. I still stand by that. Idiots. But I don't see how people can easily disregard one's feelings, and happily annoy them like it's a daily routine.
The community here, is something I was, in the long run, glad to be introduced to. A lot of people are nice, and even hearing about how strange and... egh things some fans make (Cupcakes for example... well, not a good example, I found it amusing. Fluttershy's Dark Sky is another story... ugh...) but overall, if not just for the interesting variety of people you can speak to in here, it's how good natured some are.
I like to think of myself as a cross between Fluttershy and Pinkie Pie. I like to act weird, hence why I say and write random things, but I would rather not have a complete social life IRL. It seems mostly pointless. And a knife crime waiting to happen...
If those 'friends' had turned against you, they can't really have been your friends, could they? It's just like what I heard back then. "Hey *Insert name while saying it weird*," And always trying to pretend to be friends. I got good at ignoring them to the point it was like they weren't there. I didn't even feel troubled when I got home. The point is, one knows their friends are their friends if they're trustworthy. I had these situations too.
Sometimes it's good to talk to one's parents if things trouble you. Except if they've done something terrible, or mistreated you. Even the ones who love too much probably know what they're saying. Not saying you should go talk to them, though.
Sorry to make you talk about all that if you didn't want to. I wanted to help though. To hell with anyone who gets annoyed at someone who probably wants a big hug. I strive to entertain and to put smiles on others faces. If I fail, I know I at least tried.
So I really hope my fan-fiction put a smile on your face. I hope I managed to remind you that, whether we question the meaning, or question why things went bad on it, overall, life is good.
...That wasn't too cheesy, was it?
1695380
Honestly it was worse because he was my best friend. He was the guy who planned one of my birthday parties for crying out loud! (It was a surprise party and it was awesome) He was my best friend and then he changed into a jerk. I know he was my best friend because I remember a time when a bully got me to cry and he stuck up for me. It used to be me him and another guy who were friends but then... he became more popular (basically his parents were stinking rich and he got all of the good stuff. I don't mean drugs, I'm talking about expensive toys and videogames) and that attracted the "friends" who weren't really that.
Yes you made me feel better and no it wasn't a parent or family thing. (I hate babysitters...hint hint)
You didn't force me to say anything and I would feel awkward talking about this anywhere but at least I got it off of my metaphorical chest... and into the metaphorical dumpster.
1695641 I'm just glad I could help, really.
how could pinkie have clothes? she went into the portal with out any on!