A Realm Of Strange Creatures

by Delvius

Chapter 2 -- Confound These Ponies

CHAPTER 2 - Confound These Ponies

The cyan pegasus had accompanied me for but a while, before we eventually reached the boundaries of the town -- mostly wooden fences and signs, with the occasional rock wall of some sort. The pegasus herself had barely said anything since I left with her; she just looked at me with a most annoying look of curiosity. At one point, she DID ask me where I came from, and to that question I answered honestly, as usual. She barely suppressed her laughter at the supposed ridiculousness of my response.

Soon we crossed a brightly painted wooden bridge and into a town filled with... oh, surprise, surprise, more ponies!

They were all about the place -- at the doorsteps of the feeble-looking structures, trotting about on their strange limbs while conversing with one another, in the case of OTHER pegasi flying around in the air, or simply relaxing somewhere. Also, to my chagrin, it seemed that there were multiple sub-species of these creatures; some were pegasi, some were... 'normal' ponies.

The inhabitants were of all shapes and sized; no two were exactly the same in appearance. Some were yellow, others olive, and yet some still were green -- those were just some of the colors I witnessed. Their tails, as I observed, were always of the same color scheme as their manes.

At my appearance, the townsfolk who saw me immediately either vacated the premises -- yelling something in their strange voices about 'monster' -- or just stared at me as though they were frozen. And yet, to my surprise, a few of them smiled and slowly approached.

"Does your race not have a uniform look?" I asked, taking no heed to the volume or tone of my voice. "I have witnessed creatures of strange appearance before, but this... this is a little unsettling. How flawed your race's DNA must be; too much biodiversity, I suppose."

'These creatures are the epitome of ludicrosity,' I thought.

The pegasus gave me a look of confusion, before shaking her head and locking me in a gaze. "Well, I don't know about YOUR race, but we ponies happen to like looking different from one another." Her eyes widened, and she added, "And what do you mean 'flawed DNA'?!"

I did not let myself be intimidated by her tone, and instead gestured at the population before me. "What I mean is, doesn't your kind have ANY kind of racial uniformity? I suppose all looking different from one another can reduce identity theft cases, but just WHY do you all look so different? Were your primitive ancestors promiscuous beyond compare?"

Her cheeks went a little red and her eyes widened. "Now, listen here!" she said, hovering close enough to my visor that her breaths fogged the glass. "I'll have you know that-"

But she was cut off by a voice of even greater ability to annoy.

"Rainbow Dash!" a supremely high-pitched voice half-yelled half-laughed, and a pink blur pounced onto the seething cyan pegasus from above.

"Pinkie! Get off me!" the cyan pegasus -- Rainbow Dash, yes? What a RIDICULOUS name -- yelled as she struggled to get the pink pony with the puffy mane and tail off of her.

I was about to intervene, when suddenly behind me came even more voices; all of which were somewhat less annoying than the pink one's.

"Oh, I do hope that she doesn't get her coat dirty!" a surprisingly civilized-sounding voice said.

"Oh my goodness oh my goodness oh my goodness..." a timid little voice repeated again and again.

"What is that? Is that some kind statue? Did Rainbow Dash discover something from one of those ruins in the forest? Oh, I hope she did!" another female voice said with glee.

I turned to see a small semi-circle of curious onlookers gathered before me, their diminutive forms easily dwarfed by my high stature. Out of the crowd of multi-colored ponies came three that seemed like they were trying to get to the other two struggling behind me. Those three were: a lavender pony with a moderately blue mane with streaks of rose and violet and... a horn? A... unicorn, according to my HUD. The other was a white... unicorn... with a moderately indigo mane and tail. The last was this yellow pegasus with a pink mane so long it covered one of her eyes. The last of the three immediately skidded to a stop after seeing me, her eyes wide in fear.

The other two had just gotten out of the crowd as well, and were galloping towards the bridge at full speed, the lavender one saying, "Rainbow Dash! Pinkie! What in Equestria are you-"

She skidded to a stop as well, and the white unicorn behind here rammed into her from behind. The lavender one was looking at me with eyes so wide out of awe that she didn't even glance behind her. The crowd was likewise in awe, if their whispering and murmuring was any indication.

"Oh... my... gosh..." the lavender unicorn said slowly, before shaking her head and collecting her obviously scattered wits. She stood up shook herself clean, then proceeded to approach me, her horn glowing and enveloping my suit in a strange purple aura.

'FOREIGN ENERGY DETECTED, COMMENCING COUNTERMEASURES,' my suit warned, and at once it erupted with a blast of golden light that dissipated the aura around me. The blast sent those closest to me -- the pink one, 'Pinkie', the pegasus, 'Rainbow Dash', and the two unicorns -- flying away, while those further from me immediately lost all their curiosity and ran away, screaming.

The lavender unicorn managed to levitate herself in the air, thus stopping her flight. She slowly descended to the ground, and at once began approaching me again, a look of even GREATER curiosity on her face.

Rainbow Dash had also managed to recover, and upon seeing her fellow pony approaching me flew in front of her, whirled on me, and yelled, "Get back, Twilight! This thing's too dangerous!"

"No, Rainbow Dash," 'Twilight' -- again, what a ridiculous name -- said, pushing her more violent fellow pony out of the way. "I detected an energy come from the sky earlier; a LOT of energy. And judging from how... um..." She paused, seeming to think of the right word.

"I am a male, in case that is what you are pondering," I stated.

"And a rather strange male at that," the white unicorn commented as she wiped the dust from her coat. "Why, just what ARE you wearing, my dear? It's... it's so... it's so GLAMOROUS!"

"And... scary," the pink pegasus said quietly, only barely loud enough to be heard.

I smirked, "I am wearing the Indaari Empire's power armor Mk III, if that is what you mean. As for it being glamorous... well, I suppose it does look rather dashing." I looked at my power glove with a little bit of pride.

Twilight gave me a little thankful smile, and continued before any more interruptions occurred, "Anyway! And judging from how his energy feels, he's one of the three things that fell out of the sky!"

She looked up at me with a wide grin. "Tell me, are there more of you? Oh, please tell me there are!"

"Yes, there are more of my race," I replied, finding her jubilant curiosity, among other things, amusing. "They should be arriving soon, if they are not here already."

Her eyes widened so much at that that she ignored Rainbow Dash's warnings to not approach me. "You have to tell me more!" she begged.

I looked at her for a moment, then at the town. All of them were either scared of me, or curious of me. Would entertaining this creature's queries be a good idea? What if, somewhere down in the minds of these things, there was already a part of them controlled by evil influence? What if they were all already turned, and were simply putting up a mask of innocence?

'Only one way to find out,' I thought, despite a portion of my head finding it far too difficult to believe that such creatures could ever harm... well, anything.

"Very well," I said. "Take me to your abode, or wherever you would have me."

Twilight grinned and turned around, taking all the scared looks the other inhabitants of the town were giving her without so much as a scoff. I shook my head slowly and began following her, when suddenly a bit of puffy pink mane appeared from the top of my visor.

"Heya!" Pinkie said cheerfully, moving her head away from my visor and waving a hoof at me. "So, how do you find the story so far?"

"Uh... what?" I asked, dumbfounded. "What story?"

She giggled, "Oh, you know! The story that YOU-" She tapped my helmet. "-yourself will be writing so many years from now because some author on a distant planet scripted you to write it because you're ACTUALLY a character of his story!"

I just stared at her for the longest time, shaking my head. "You are a very strange pony," I said simply.

She barely suppressed herself from bursting into all out laughter, and said, "And just so you know, I'm mostly the reason you're going to name this chapter what you will! I won't even tell you the chapter name, so that you won't try to change it when you actually do write it on that notebook of yours."

"My notebook?!" I asked aloud. "How did you know about my notebook? Are you an intergalactic spy slash assassin who's been monitoring my activities? Because if you are..." I took a step back, shaking her off. Then I drew my blade, which had for this whole time been sheathed on my back. The Fleticium blade rang in the air as I slowly lowered it down to touch her forehead.

At that, everyone in the area looked at me with horror. Even Twilight, who had just a moment ago seemed so eager to let me into her own home, now looked at me with terror. Rainbow Dash was against the ground, body ready to pounce me and pummel me.

"Oooh," Pinkie said, "Now would be the time to throw my super-awesome 'Welcoming-You!' party! It's what the author wants to happen, so I'll let it happen!" She reached behind her and pulled out a... a CANNON?!

"Let's party!" she cheered, and the cannon blasted it's confetti at me. For some reason that confetti stuck to my visor, rendering me blind. Even stranger, music suddenly blasted out from nowhere and I heard the sounds of doors opening and closing, and the sounds of joyous screaming was suddenly everywhere.

Amidst my blind fumbling, I slipped on something on the ground and landed myself hard into... something pink and white... and mushy... and had a very large amount of sugar...

But through all that, I could only yell in my head, 'Confound these ponies!'

Comments

[Detective Chmilewsky]

I like it so far, except for the part where Pinkie Pie straight out breaks the fourth wall and pretty much tells everyone that their actions are being controlled by an author. I was never really a fan of that.

[Delvius]

1449340 yes, well, it was a daring move on my part. Still, as my other story (New Roam) is very serious, I decided to make this one a little ridiculous and generally lighthearted.

And you can never have enough Pinkie, NEVER.

[Herpidty Derp]

Surprised you didn't add, "They drive me to drink!"

[Delvius]

1462491 Yeah,vwell, Pinkie isn't alcoholic.