Sunset Shimmer's ambition grew along with her power and knowledge, and she decided to become an alicorn princess and rule at Princess Celestia's side. When the princess didn't turn her into an alicorn, Sunset jumped through the portal in a last show of rebellion and into another world.
A world devoid of magic but much more advanced technologically. Sunset figures that if she solves the conundrum of this strange new world and manages to combine magic with technology, she'll ascend into a princess and take her rightful place.
With a familiar face assisting her and the help of an inquisitive girl, Sunset sets out on the path of research and development. The world might not be ready for what is to come, but Sunset will still spearhead a revolution bigger than any world has ever seen.
Cover art by yours truly
Teen rating for teenagers.
6/15/24 - Featured! Thanks a lot!
And so it begins.
How dark is this story going to be?
This is definitely an alt-universe tale, so I'm surprised it doesn't have that tag.
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And so it does begin.
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I can promise you that it won't get too dark. No red tags for a reason ;)
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The tag guide states the following:
Since this fic starts where the comic "The Fall of Sunset Shimmer" ended, I believe this technically doesn't count as AU. Howeve, if enough people believe otherwise, I think I should reconsider huh?
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I guess it depends on how the story pans out then, in this case.
Beautiful cover art
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Thanks a lot! c:
Enjoying it a lot and the ideas behind this story.
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I think when it says "start at a point in canon and diverge through character development or other in-story events generally do not qualify as AU", it means that it doesn't qualify if, for the first few events of the story at least, it fits into canon, even if later on it diverges. Meanwhile, basically the first that happens in this story is a change to canon events, so I'd say it definitely qualifies for an AU tag.
Generally, I'd say the key things the tag is for is when a story focuses on either a world that is significantly different from any of the worlds we've been shown, or specifically on events progressing differently that they do in canon. And it seems like the latter will definitely apply here. Obviously, it's up to you, but I'd advise adding the tag.
That being said, whether this U is A or not, I'm definitely interested in seeing where it goes.
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Thanks for the insight! I'll be mulling it over during this week.
I'm glad you're liking it. I've been working for a long time on this story, and I'm excited to get it out for people to
harshly judgeenjoy!I definitely care about your other stories and I most certainly want to see the magical girl drama you’re whipping up here. Please continue!
So the fic does last longer than two chapters. Nice. I was worried she'd go home there.
Oh, this is very intriguing. Some fascinating answers to questions like Sunset’s age and immediately post-portal housing situation. Definitely looking foreard to seeing where you take this… and what goes horribly awry to trap Sunset in this world for thirty moons.
(Edit: I swear that second chapter wasn’t there a second ago…
)
Ah yes, the unexpectedly diegetic musical numbers. For if there's any evidence of the human world's magic, it's those. Well, those and Pinkie Pie, but Sunset hasn't met her yet. Looking forward to seeing where this goes... and how Sunset may manage to get away with any bullying while living under the same roof as the principals.
Definitely a twist with Celestia finding out the truth *half truth* right away.
Music is an art. It takes practice. Interesting plot point to explain why she would stay knowing ahe has no horn an no access to the magic she is familiar with.
Sunset's not seeing that if we did find out magic actually existed and figured out how it worked, we'd just call it something else scientific. Magic will always be used to refer to something fictional.
I'm liking it more and more.
This is the beginning of a beautiful friendship, even if neither friend would choose to describe it that way. Also, loving the magibabble. Internally consistent magical systems are always a delight to experience. Looking forward to seeing what these two can teach each other, and how meeting each other this early in their lives alters the course of their futures.
(Also, I kind of hope the Celestias begin writing to one another. It'd be good not just for Sunset but for them.)
Meanwhile, in another world surprisingly not that far from this one: an exploding rainbow caused a girl's magic to go so haywire, she passed a prestigious exam with flying colours.
Homer Simpson:"NEEEEEERRRRRRD!"
So, when is Sci-Twi gonna find her star hairpin??
"Is magic Turing complete?" is not a thought I expected to have today.
I'm not sure I buy this given the existence of weather factories. Instinct does not generally lead immediately to mass production. But this is from the perspective of a Canterlot unicorn who may have never set hoof in a cloud city, so some allowances have to be made for her limited perspective. Likewise earth ponies, unless Manehattan skyscrapers take form like termite mounds. (And the same caveat about Sunset's "I'm 13 and this is deep" perspective applies.)
In any case, brilliant work with the duet that never was. The question of human cutie marks is always a fascinating one, as is seeing this kind of subtle yet obvious magic in action. Looking forward to more.
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You're absolutely right. Though there is some truth in this as well. The majority of Pegasi magic is physical, which means they need their hooves or wings to manipulate the weather, and their factories are mainly production lines that need that physical magic to work, but they don't require them to know why it works. Only the rainbow and the snowflake factories need ponies to know what they're doing.
Since I don't plan on talking much about this specific kind of magic, I thought I'd give you my thoughts (and this fic's canon) on the matter. In future chapters I'll talk at length about unicorn magic, though, so I hope you like that!
Thanks! It took me and Crow several days to get the lyrics right!
I'm particularly proud of how this turned out here. Human Cutie Marks are majorly useless since they don't believe in destinies like ponies, but they're still a part of who they are. It also was a nice excuse to have Twilight start believing in magic for real.
I'm glad you're liking it this far!
Now Sunset is smart. Really smart. Smart enough to earn the position of Celestia's personal student.
And she just met a verifiable genius. Sunset might have considered herself one before now, but it's hard to really keep that up when despite all of your studies and experience, someone with no studies or experience comes very close to you on their first try.
It's a good thing Twilight's so adorkably precious that even Sunset can't stay defensive around her for long.
Thursdays are already becoming my favorites, I can't imagine how hard it will be when sunset sees who the real Princess will be.
Using the portal as a sort of magical jumper cable to prod Sunset's magical awareness into some slim modicum of what's she's used to. Brilliant! (And I wouldn't be surprised if Shining's fine with magic existing based on tabletop RPG experience.)
And yes, this isn't friendship. It's just mutually beneficial, mutually enjoyable cooperation. Toooootally different.
Looking forward to more.
I too felt that the story for the games was stronger with the subplot. Sunset was starting to question if she should go home since she felt as if she was hitting a wall as far as new magic to learn. Plus, it showed us that some objects, such as bits, could pass through the portal unchanged.
Pretty good and interesting scenario where Sunset is more open to others about magic existing, due to human Celestia already seeing her come out of the portal. Combined with her earlier encounter with Sci-Twi, and seems Sunset is at least gonna be less of a mean bully than in canon (not that she'd get away with it as easily due to being under Celestia's surveillance) even if she isn't the nicest person around, meaning the Humane 5's friendship could remain intact.
Out of curiosity, what outfits to Sunset and Sci-Twi have at this point (being preteens at this point)? Is it the same outfits as the cover shows them (unless those are for them when they are 15-17 year old teenagers)?
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At this point, Sunset is 13, while Twilight is 11. You could imagine their outfits the same as the cover for now if you want c:
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Out of curiosity, how old would you say the Humane 5 are at this point? Are they 13 like Sunset (meaning Sci-Twi is the youngest in the group), 11 like Sci-Twi (implying Sunset could simply just be held back due to adapting to a new world), or a mix of the two?
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I haven't decided on their ages (or have I?), but I imagine Twilight being the youngest and Sunset the oldest. So take that as you will.
Me, nodding along and pretending I understand what the girls are saying while most of it goes over my head.
Don't worry, Sunset. If the violin doesn't work out, you can always try another instrument. Like a guitar, for a completely random, non-specific example.
It looks like I was building the foundations for the drama and look how time passed so quickly.
Never mind that she has a local analogous process that she can use to contextualize this.
I wonder how long it will take for her to propose that Equestria is a simulated reality given how existence itself can be coaxed into running programs. (Of course, if the same can be said for her own universe...)
Heh. I swear I'm writing these comments as I go.
How dare she make Sunset question her preconceived notions about what it took to become an alicorn? The very idea!
Yeah, who does that! Twilight, who does that? Tell me after you've finished going over your ideas to map Boolean logic to spellcraft.
In any case, Sunset's getting a family whether she likes it or not, and Cadence definitely sees more than she lets on. Nothing about magic, obviously. Well, not any magic Sunset would recognize as such.
Looking forward to more. I do wonder what would go into a magical wave detector. Hopefully it won't require a giant tank of liquid helium or something else similarly elaborate, but given that humanity managed to miss the magic lying under their noses for millennia, proving its existence probably won't be a simple matter. (On the other hand, it could just be a matter of knowing what to look for ahead of time.)
It's kinda funny how Sunset called combustion engines a "perfected steam engine." She also needs to keep in mind that sufficiently advanced technology is virtually indistinguishable from magic.
Huh, I thought for sure they would've done the "sunshine sunshine ladybugs awake" thing.
Sunset can try to figure out Celestia's game all she wants, but she never will while she's assuming the wrong one. She thinks Celestia is trying to play Betrayal at House on the Hill against her, when she's actually simply trying to play The Game of Life against herself.
Huh. Given Sunset's competitive nature and need to be the best, I'm surprised she didn't determine to practice until she can play Paganini's Caprice No. 24 backwards and upside down.
Then again, give her a month or two and we'll see.
Even if Sunset does accept that this Celestia is sincere, I’m sure that’s how she’ll phrase it: This Celestia is sincere, an anomaly and deviation from her old mentor.
In any case, looking forward to more, especially seeing how the not-a-friendship develops. I’m sure they’ll be making beautiful music together. Literally!
Sunset: "I won't be fooled. I know you're all just trying to befriend me for your parents' politics, but it won't work if I make myself a loner!"
Twilight: "I won't be fooled. I may not know what you're doing or why you're trying to befriend me, but it still won't work if I'm a natural born loner!"
I do love how Friendship is Witchcraft has left indelible in-jokes on the fandom like this and Sweetie Bot.
In any case, I should have suspected Spike would show up shortly after Twilight found her mark. Now it's a question of how much Sunset will resent a puppy competing for Twilight's attention... and whether Cadence will make the comparison to a jealous younger sibling that I'm already thinking of. (Of course, Cadence is likely hoping for a different sort of relationship between the two.
) Still, I suspect he'll grow on Sunset in time. Every great endeavor needs a good mascot.
Yup
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