This is an alternative version of what could have happened in Newbie Dash, in terms of Rainbow Dash developing an eating disorder (anorexia nervosa) instead of trying to undo her nickname in ridiculous ways.
(No Starlight Glimmer here.)
(This is turning into a full on character study now, oops.)
NEW: I made a bit of a compilation of Dash’s ED changing/evolving over time throughout the show’s seasons. Some of the scenes are brought up in this fic (in case someone needs a refresher, without having to rewatch the whole show).
Chapters (46)
Man, Luna is 0 for 2 when it comes to nightmares so far. Get to fuckin' work, Princess.
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Make that 0 for 3 now
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Lol you guys crack me up
Luna is trying her best; Celestia is the one who’s ‘helping’ in questionable ways.
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Yeah, well at this point both of them screwed up.
Then again, that’s not unexpected from Alicorns these days
This alternative version explores a unique Death By AI and a thought-provoking storyline, delving into deeper themes and character development beyond the original episode's scope.
love it
Glad to see this back! ❤️
I'm really enjoying reading this because i can relate to some of it. I can't wait till the next chapter
Poor Dash.
Where is Luna when Rainbow needed her to help out with her nightmares?
So very sad to know that the Sunset of this universe is long dead and that Rainbow could very well have the same fate.
Poor Rainbow, I badly wanna give her a big comforting hug.
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No no, Sunset is fine! :) the afflicted pony was a student that Tia had long before Sunset, and long before Luna’s return, so this was new to Luna as well.
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Oh thank goodness!! Thank you for clearing that up.
Before anyone asks: no, Twi doesn’t have/develop an eating disorder. There is a pretty big point to their discovery though, but more on that later.
God, as her condition is worsening this is getting harder to read, aka very good job with the writing I feel horrible!
God, I really need to stop procrastinating My math but god damn it, this story so gripping I’ve never done any research into eating disorders And Just wow, this is heart wrenching. I am practically screaming at my screen right now! Sir or miss author you are doing an amazing job at writing this.
I am favouring and tracking this immediately, I still haven’t seen the date since this is last updated and I’m going to cry if this has been abandoned. (if it has been abandoned and if the author is reading this, don’t worry if this is no pressure to upload again if you’re going through something or just don’t want too)
Edit) ITS ALIVE!!! (I was having flashbacks The rainbow Academy comic when checking the date)
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Thank you soo much for your lovely feedback
I’m currently on vacation, so updates could be slow for a bit 😅
She needs to explain to rainbow parents that praising everything has caused rainbow not to believe in it for starters. That would help some. Having a real relationship with them wouldn't hurt. I honestly thought they were ridiculous in the show.
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Yeah, the first time I saw the episode I only thought ‘what the hell?’. Now it makes so much sense why she was acting the way she was in some earlier episodes, and I realised, “wait, if they were always like this, that would totally f her up”.
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It’s absolutely insane that the takeaway of the episode was, “nah, this is fine, feel free to murder your Child’s social life, and cock a gun to the head of their humility.
Alright, plot prediction time! Rainbow is going to succeed at doing the performance, but just barely and when she fully does it, she then breaks down in some kind of injury so it’s bittersweet! (Bonus sub prediction, There will be coughing up of blood)
Poor Rainbow Dash, I just wanna give her a great big comforting hug and at the same time I wanna knock some literal sense into Zephyr's dense skull with a frying pan.
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Agreed. 🍳💥 😵
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Thanks!
Another great chapter and I am really enjoying this story.
I have noticed that our favorite dashie is somehow shorter than the others.
I understand the reality of eating disorders as some years ago I used to be bulimic myself and I still sometimes have issues with food and my own body image and the many demons in my head but I am trying to get over it but anyways thanks for writing this story. Please keep it up.
Also looking forwards to the next chapter...dashies parents...oh boy!
-Frost
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Feedback like this means the world to me
I really hope that we’ll someday be free from these demons 🙏🏻🫶🏻🍀🩵
Much love to you
I did a thing
(PMV/ music video fic trailer/ whatever you want to call it)
Zephyr, you dense dope, just when I thought you couldn't stoop any lower, you somehow get lower than one thought once impossible.
I don’t know how I feel about this already being over 70k words, the next chapter has over 5k words
When I started writing this, I only wanted to have a small project for a change (I usually write 100k+ word fics) but it seems I am incapable of ‘short stories’ now lol.
At this rate, I don’t see this fic being completed before it hits 100k words. I can only hope that it doesn’t get too boring for people to come back to read new chapters
cause I’m not done with
torturingmy characters yet xDTo say I'm 'enjoying' this story feels wrong, bc these struggles and darknesses are so real. Ya know?
It's so real.
... when I saw there's a new chapter, I dropped everything and read it, and I wish your next chapter were already out!
Haha, love this line. Twilight's are great too.
I do get the feeling Pinkie's not a very beloved character here. That's author preference I guess, but she has depth too. Real depth, not just the wacky depth.
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Oh my gosh, thank you sooo much 🥹 🩵
I have nothing against Pinkie, I swear. I’ve just never really included her much in any of my (old, revoked) fics, mostly just focusing on Dash and Twi, so it’s a bit hard for me to really get a feel for her character. Since she normally cheers up the others with her parties and cupcakes, but knows that exactly that would definitely not cheer Dashie up and only add more stress, she’s been more laid back/in the background until now, cause I don’t really know what to do with her most of the time 😅
She is definitely a caring, sensitive, considerate friend (I especially love the scenes in Too Many Pinkie Pies where she breaks the laws of physics so Dash could rest whilst she still has fun near her, before the duplicate chaos lol) and hates when her friends are sad. I hope I’m more or less managing to portray her as such, not just her randomness. If not, then that’s totally on me and not on Pinkie.
I haven’t written an mlp fic since 2017 or so, so I’m a bit out of practice when it comes to writing most characters 😅 I’m glad to hear that people are enjoying this regardless
I really am enjoying this story and what you have created; this is so relatable. (as i have commented in the other chapter...I have my own demons with my own body and well food and stuff)
Boring? please. this is one of the best fics I have read for a while and I dont care if it is long...that is what I live for.
You are doing the other mane characters fine. They are in character for me and I honestly have no issues with this story. Also I love your torture of characters.
Keep up the awesome work and I look forward to you (hopefully) writing some other stuff on here in the future
- frost (a fan)
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Thank you so much for your continued support 🙏🏻 it means a lot, seriously.
I suppose that, even after all these months, I’m still insecure about my writing after being told that “Reading this made me lose brain cells. You should seriously consider quitting writing altogether.” and “Your fanfic is the literary equivalent of nails on a chalkboard. It's grating, unpleasant, and utterly devoid of merit.”
My goal with my fics, regardless of the fandom, is to bring awareness to those who don’t know, and comfort to those who are afflicted themselves, and for them to genuinely feel seen and heard with their struggles. I don’t sugarcoat what I write about, because if we never talk about these heavier topics and the reality of it, then there’s no point in writing about it.
I may not be able to change the world, but if just one person feels less alone, or is able to help someone else with their struggles thanks to having a better understanding because of what I write, then that is a huge achievement
She's a good friend.
Yknow, I do love Spitfire. It'd be great if we got more Wonderbolts.
He's a good friend too.
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Hmm, I guess I could add a Grand Galloping Gala chapter 🤔 the Wonderbolts would be expected to be there, Twi probably too cuz she’s a princess, and they could easily bring the rest of the gang obviously.
(Dash says in season one that the Wonderbolts perform every year at the gala but we don’t see them at all in Make new friends but keep Discord. I suppose we can overlook that continuity error and have it a fact that the Wonderbolts are expected to be there every year, if only for the sake of Dash having to eat in public and talking about the newspaper articles with the rest of the Wondebolts. I might have to have the gala be during winter though, I’m already stretching fall/autumn pretty long as it is 😅)
I just realised we never got another gala episode after Dash became a Wonderbolt
hi sry if this is weird i just wanted to say that MY GOSH ur writing is like soooooo good ???? like im just always so drawn in nd invested its like ugghhh if i could thumbs up a story more than once i totally would
i know this is a heavy topic nd i rly hope ure doing much better now nd taking care of urself. sending lots of support !!!💕💕
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Oh gosh, thank you so much for your kind words 🫶🏻 I’m always so glad to hear that people are enjoying it 🩵
It’s a struggle, but I’d say it honestly helps to work through the thoughts and stuff through writing, even if it means that there’s a lot more dark/sad hurt and comfort in this story than I originally intended 😅
Much love to you too 💕💕💕
I was not expecting to be on the 38th chapter of this alternate take on Newbie Dash, but I like how it's moving along.
The writing is great, I'm drawn in and invested in the plot, and despite being such a heavy topic for discussion, it still feels genuinely entertaining and informative, without being overtly dark and depressing. Sure, it is still mildly dark and a wee bit depressing, but it's more underlying and subtle than anything.
I didn't think I'd like this story at first once it was revealed that Dash has an eating disorder, but I'm genuinely intrigued to see this through, just to know how this ends.
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Trust me, I can’t believe it either how many chapters this has now 😅😂 I originally thought it would be like 20-30k words max when I started this project (I’m apparently terrible at estimating such things). I hope that I can wrap this up in a total of 50 chapters, but I guess we’ll have to see what else my brain cooks up.
Topics like these are always daunting, or maybe it’s just hard to imagine a character having such a problem, so I totally understand when people decide it just isn’t for them (or at least for the time being). I honestly never expected to have so many people interested and invested in this, and I’m thankful for every single one
I hope you’ll enjoy the future chapters the same way
My favorite of this chapter lol.
Clever way to stretch autumn ;)
Have a little laugh at my (silly) ‘Dashie obviously has an ED’ interpretation of the muffin scene from The Cutie Map to lift your spirits again after that mess of a chapter
And how many more times are you going to learn that until it sticks for good, Twilight Sparkle? You nearly failed in that regard when Starlight Glimmer decided to become friends with Trixie. They say that the one eternal thing of the universe is change. If you are afraid of that, you should ask yourself why you are and at the very least, control it before it controls you. That way you won't have major cases of poor communication and driving everyone you care for away from you with your hopeless perfectionism.
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Good thing Glimmie never became Twi’s student here 😉
In this case, her obsessive need for control stems from her fear of losing Dash if she relinquishes that control, which she only thinks she has. She’s currently trapped in a vicious circle of knowing that she’s handling it wrong, but not being able to stop it — which should sound familiar (*cough* Dash *cough*). At least she learned her lesson from Lesson Zero and won’t pull an Every Little Thing She Does on her friends to stay in control when she needs to step out of her own comfort zone.
The thing is, this isn’t a made up, exaggerated worry. Parents and friends of people with eating disorders have to live with the fear that their child/friend could relapse badly enough to send them to the grave at any point in time, because these disorders force you to keep it hidden until you literally can’t anymore. Many ED’ed people have to live in special homes with other disordered people and trained nurses to ensure that they don’t relapse, and if they do, that they receive support right away.
So Twi’s fears are real and definitely not unfounded, but she’s going to have to learn to live with it and learn to not see the worst case scenario at every small hiccup. They will all have to.
Twilight has been helping Dash through the hardships in any way she can, and now it’s Dash’s (and the others’) turn to help Twilight stop twilighting.
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You raise a valid point on the ED business, for I read a graphic novel about a character going through that.
Still, it's disappointing seeing Twilight still hold on to her OCD or OCPD like its her lifeline and not learning to keep it under control, considering that living in Canterlot has given her the idea that she must be perfect even for the sake of it.
Then again, due to the way the show went and ended, it's unlikely we won't get to see the character development for Twilight officially. But we can make up for that with the stories we put on FIMFiction.
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Well mental health treatments seem close to non existent and since twilight never got treatment for her ocd and the thought that her friend might die is causing her to have to something if only to feel like things aren't out of control. Maybe dash needs a reason to live and not think about calories. I'm not an expert but I heard it worked for one person so maybe reminding her of how much tank needs her would help
Merry Holidays, Xenay. Hope you recover from Covid, and still liking the story so far.
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Thank you
There are times for living, and times for surviving. Robinson Crusoe can vouch for that.
I know the covid feeling too well. Suddenly feeling warm enough to be comfortable in bed is one of fever's tricks. Hope you recover from it, Merry Christmas and Happy New Year.