This story is a submission to the Equestria Girls 10th Anniversary Romance Contest!
Amidst the Battle of the Bands, the tension between the Rainbooms, and school finals, Rainbow Dash's tough exterior cracks one night.
Chapters (1)
- Member Since 25th Jan, 2023
- offline last seen 51 minutes ago
Aromatic Brew
Greetings! I'm Aroma and I write a lot of romance, slice of life, and comedy fics about my favorite technicolor pony weirdos!
Aromatic Brew
Joined 25th Jan, 2023 ·
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Ok I respect you for writing a FlutterDash story
but there are few issues with it I think I should point out
1. The dialogues feel very unnatural, like I don't know try to re-read it few times and ask yourself if real people would talk like that
or Rainbow and Flutters in this case specifically
2. Rainbow felt very out of character, I dont mind where in stories her softer side is shown but here it wasn't very well built upon, this leads to the point number 3
3. The pacing is very fast, story like this needs details, more characterisation etc
This was so cute