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Starlight Glimmer has succeeded. Twilight Sparkle and her friends never met. Their influence on Equestria never came to pass.
But is victory truly worth earning if the future you end up with is coming apart at the seams? Starlight isn't so sure anymore.
After all, it's hard to be sure of anything without a cutie mark to guide you.
Featured on Equestria Daily! 6/26/2024
Edited by the always amazing Jacky Fresh!
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hi
WOOOOO I've been looking forward to this!!
Ok, I'll preemptively comment I guess.
Great premise that I haven't really ever thought about before.
Again, put Carrot Top in (I don't even care how minor the role would be), or I unfollow you.
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I'll make sure to include her, no worries!
I'm Lyn, and this is my favourite garden in Equestria.
I said the line, are y'all happy?
"Infinitude" is probably my favourite word now.
It'll be interesting to keep track of this, love the alt timeline, so let's see how Starlight gets bullied into being good this go-around!
... This comment mostly serves as to boost the story, so y'know, b o o s t.
This line makes me chuckle. Just like 'don't worry!'
Awkward silence
What do you mean don't worry-
John, we've got a god of chaos to kill here, looks like.It'll be interesting to dig into the actual timeline here, and how everything changed. An unfortunate side-effect of the episode was losing a bit of that context- so while the timeline exploration is fun...
I am a lore-hound.
So hopefully, Discord gets to have some evil villain monologues. Totally his thing.
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Thanks. You truly cannot comprehend how much I will enjoy that.
My favorite part was the part you wrote :)
Yay, I'm secretly a long comment leaver on occasion!
Extra period at the end there, and I can't help but be reminded of:
Starlight by Electric Light Orchestra
For a fic marked Drama, Dark, and even Horror, this made me genuinely laugh.
And not to be nitpicky, but I've read that it's usually ?!, not !?. Since the sentence is at its heart a question, with emphasis added on top of that, the ? comes first.
The hay does the phrase even mean to ponies?!
While it was a little weird to see Lyra and Roseluck take that fact so easily, it's refreshing that the main character didn't even try to lie about/hide their origins for once. That happens way too often in fics.
Extra space within It's.
Space needed after "moving."
All in all, an absolutely splendifferous first chapter.
Yes, this is truly the way I comment on stories sometimes, line divisions and all.
Take the shebang of folder adds, and I really hope you outgrow the Needs More Attention one.
Really enjoying this. Like how we'll probably get to see the side ponies in the spotlight, obviously always a treat. I also can't wait to see what happened to the Mane Six. Always very unique and very fun seeing alternate timelines explored! Can't wait to see more!
Dope work on this. The dialogue was great and the premise of the story is super entertaining so far. Ima def be here for the next chapter.
also sorry it took me so long to comment on this, I admit I should have finished this chapter way earlier 😭
Theory… Discord being dimensionally “exotic” is aware he has lost something very precious because of her meddling… and is about to make her pay for it in spades.
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Literally me reading this while it's incomplete
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11928038
Yo same, that's my favorite part too 😎
That was awesome.
I'm thrilled that I managed to get around to this. You perfectly managed to recapture the intensity and possibility that was opened when the season five finale just aired and dystopian AUs were the hot topic. I still enjoy those stories immensely, and it's unfortunate that a lot of the longer ones were discontinued over the years. I'm really hoping that this won't suffer the same end, since it's absolutely thrilling. I love it when authors manage to not tone down the Everfree Forest, as many recent fanfics have done. Even if not everypony is the main cast, it's still filled with horrific monsters and dangers that would realistically (and viscerally) remind ponies that they are indeed prey animals. I'm already expecting a great, action-packed adventure out of this. You've already done a lot of world-building in just one chapter, and that's what I'm here for. Especially since I want to know how Roseluck, Lyra, and Starlight (a timeline outsider) managed to lose their cutie marks. If Discord happened to take them away, why did he do it?
The characterization here was great too. Pre-reformation Starlight is a great tossup of awkward and opportunist. Roseluck is a broken optimist trying to protect her friends -- and I'm hoping that includes the rest of the Flower Ponies. Lyra is eternally a dork, but her survival instincts are still apparent in this dark setting.
As for the problem of the scroll: if Starlight is from Timeline A and brought that timeline's scroll with her to Timeline B, wouldn't Timeline B still have its own version of the scroll in Canterlot? Are they going to be journeying to Canterlot? Based on what Roseluck and Lyra have been saying, it's definitely a trip that they make often enough, even though it is now much more perilous. Since Luna didn't get reformed, I'm going to assume that something happened to Celestia (I'd like to know what) which only leaves Cadance as an alicorn at this point in time. She'd likely be the only one in Canterlot (or its ruins) that still has any access to the scroll of Timeline B. And that's assuming that Discord didn't eat it first...
Nice start! Found some minor errors.
Space at the start there
And an extra quotation mark
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Thank you very much, and I fixed those!
Looking forward to following this one!
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It makes me wonder just how many times this has happened for it to become commonplace.
And how many visitors from a alternate dimension are still running around?
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That line of thinking is very intriguing.
Such a beautiful and crazy world you've put Starlight in. Can't wait to see more of it!
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I'm glad to hear that! Hopefully you like what I've got cooked up. Updates will be coming soon, real life has just been swamping me haha.