• Published 5th Aug 2024
  • 4,278 Views, 109 Comments

Holding Onto The Crutch We Call Life - Soaring



Anon's life has downspiraled after he experienced his first form of heartbreak. Amplified by his depression, he remains locked in his house. Fortunately for him, a mare named Starlight couldn’t let him suffer alone.

  • ...
24
 109
 4,278

Is It Just Me?

The Next Day - Sitting on a Singular Stair Step of the Entrance to the Sugarcube Corner - Where in Equestria was Starlight Glimmer?

“Uh…”

Anon’s voice trailed off. He was sitting there, right in front of Sugarcube Corner, waiting for Starlight to meet up with him, and of course, he got himself stuck in a precarious situation, one totally not caused by him whatsoever. Instead, it was caused by a pony, a teal one with a horn on her head. She was staring at him with an intense squint, her eyes searching his face while her snout was slowly moving closer and closer to his face. She would sometime tilt her head a little, and that would make wonder if she would pounce on him, which would most likely trigger his flight or fight response (it was totally his flight one, he ain’t fighting whatever this horned weirdo was thinking of); while other times, she would have this little ear tweak before it would flop against her skull, and that moment, it was like watching a dog waiting for her owner to throw a ball past them. It would surprise Anon a little if he saw the mare’s tail swaying behind her, like ‘Ooo, throw me the ball that you have in your left pocket!’ and—

He coughed when the mare suddenly shook her head and leaned back, standing more upright than ever before.

“Do you…?”

“Sorry,” she muttered, her golden eyes blinking. “Do you come here often?”

“No,” Anon said.

He didn’t want to say anything else. This mare was freaking him out. But for some reason, he wasn’t going to walk away from this one. He had a feeling, one that tickled his back hairs and his spine at the same time, that the mare would follow him if he went elsewhere. So Anon stayed. Anon waited and waited and waited. Nothing happened.

He waited some more.

The mare’s muzzle twitched.

Anon gulped as he saw her horn start to channel magic into it, its hue being a rich gold, just like her eyes, and then his eyes widened and—

“What species are you?”

“I’m a hu—

“Hey Lyra!”

Suddenly, another pony appeared out of thin air. This time, it wasn’t the Pink one either. It was a cream colored mare, her voice rather jovial despite just causing Anon to jumpstart his heart with a jumpscare out of hell, while the one that was now not charging her magic turned to her and—

“Hey, Bonnie!”

The two shared a nuzzle.

“Uh…”

‘Bonnie’ turned to him, her mane full of bounce—kinda like Starlight’s—and smiled. “Sorry about Lyra. She just freezes up whenever she comes across a new species she has never seen before!”

The fact she has a track record for meeting new species made Anon cautiously respond, “Okay…” He raised a brow at Lyra, who was now babbling something about his ‘weirdly shaped hooves’. “Is she good?”

“Probably,” Bonnie said with a shrug. “I’m surprised this is the first time we’ve seen you here. Isn’t your name Anon?”

Anon mentally shat himself upon hearing his name. He glanced over at the formerly intense-staring pony whose name is Lyra (great, at least she knows her’s now too) and watched as she was smiling softly at the two of them. Yet, in Anon’s mind, that smile turned wicked, a grin spreading to both ends of her cheeks, and he wondered if he was just mentally making these pictures up out of an internal panic he was creating for himself.

Probably.

“Yeah.”

Anon decided to not elaborate any further. He needed to keep himself short. Ignore them. Ignore them maybe. It’ll work, as long as another ‘Bonnie’ type didn’t get birthed from the ether. Heck, he’d even be okay if it’s the Chosen One (Pinkie Pie) that gave him his next heart attack, but he’s gotten a bit more acclimated to her sudden appearances out of thin air, so he’d probably just see his life flash before his eyes instead. But with this discovery, that another pony had that ability made him wonder if these ponies had a spy division in their military.

“Oh? Hi! I was at your welcome party. Do you remember me?”

He squinted. There were a lot of ponies there (thanks to Pinkie, of course), so remembering everyone’s name that day was not possible. So, he shook his head.

“No, I’m sorry.”

“Don’t worry, Anon. There were a lot of ponies there, so I don’t blame you at all,” Bonnie cheerfully replied. “It’s nice to finally meet you outside that party.”

“Likewise,” he said lamely, but watched as Bonnie flung out her hoof in front of him, like she wanted him to shake it. He looked at it, saw that it looked normal, and then just looped his fingers around it. Then, he shook it.

She returned her hoof to her side, albeit slowly. Anon knew where this awkward exchange was going, judging by how she was rubbing her hoof with her other hoof just now. She was probably wondering why his hand felt weird against her fur. He had to get through a few loops just to get Twilight’s friends to shake his hand. They said it was like little spiders were crawling on their skin, and that alone made them feel uncomfortable. But then they realize it's his hand, and they’re fine with it.

Bonnie appeared to be the same way. Smiling awkwardly, lips twitching, and totally not holding her hoof still.

Lyra picked up on this, her scowl now apparent on her face, but then it morphed into concern when she turned to Bonnie. “Are you okay, Bonnie?”

She shoved her hoof back to the ground, shakily. “I’m fine. His… um…”

“Fingers,” Anon added.

“Right, fingers…” she said, shivering. “They tickled.”

“Tickled?”

“Like spiders.”

Anon mentally fist pumped. He was a mind reader. Maybe he can be one of those types with the funky tent setup, and the magical ball ‘OoOoOo’ type person—wait, isn’t that just reading palms?

He hummed to himself. Tuning out the conversation that was going on right beside him. It was probably still about his hands. Whatever. Where was Starlight? Was she fashionably late again or something?

Egh.

He looked back over at the two mares. They stopped talking now, and were looking at him. One had opened their mouth and—

“Did you hear anything we were saying?”

Anon blinked.

“Sorry, my selective hearing was on. What did you say?”

Bonnie shook her head, tsk-tsking all the while. “Stallions… We were asking if you were waiting for somepony.”

“Oh, yeah. I’m waiting for Starlight,” Anon said, his attention now garnered. He leaned towards Bonnie a tad, showing that he was actually paying attention. “She was supposed to meet me here for a little get-together, but she’s running late.”

The ponies turned to look at the sky. The sun was starting to do something in the sky—was it going up or down?—whatever, it was late, he knew that much. He had just gotten off work and boy, was happy to be off it. Mayor Mare had some reports that needed to be analyzed, so he did that, and then he had a couple permits to write up, only to show said permits to somepony who needed them, and then said somepony signed them with no problem so he could file them in a safe place. Easiest agreement ever signed. Oh, and all the while, Mayor Mare was teasing him again. Something about—

“How was your date with Starlight?”

He mentally facepalmed.

“It was not a date.”

He remembered how her muzzle had tilted up when he had said that to her.

“Oh? Then what was it? A foray in friendship?”

“Mayor Mare, never say that word again.”

“Friendship?”

Anon had threatened to walk out the door at that moment. Mayor Mare had not bought it for a second. What Anon learned so far living here and working for Mayor Mare is that mares sometimes behaved like guys did back on Earth, and that was fine… a bit. It threw him off, mostly because he wasn’t a fan of them sounding like dude bros randomly in the middle of flirting with him, but hey, it could be worse. It could be way worse.

It could be Twili—

“Anon?”

He blinked and looked to his left.

There she was. Horse named Starlight.

Neigh.

“Hey, Starlight.”

Starlight moved a bit more freely toward him, leaning up to his side and nuzzling into him. “Hey, Anon.” He watched as she hummed, making his arm feel a bit odd, before turning to address the two that—wait they were still there that entire time?—“Hello, Lyra. Bonnie.”

She was a bit more straight up with them, blunt.

“Hey… Starlight.” Lyra greeted. Her ears were splayed against her head, and she was moving a little bit back, like her hindlegs were trying to make sure whatever ground was behind her was actually ground.

Bonnie matched her a bit, a sheepish smile sticking solidly on her muzzle. “Hi Starlight.”

Her tail was between her legs.

Starlight smiled. “How did you two meet Anon?”

“M-Meet?”

Bonnie smiled. “Lyra saw him and wanted to see who he was since, well, she never had met him before—”

Starlight gasped. “Really? Lyra, you’ve never talked to Anon?”

Lyra nodded. “I was sick when they had his welcome party.”

“Oh, right,” Starlight replied, nearly facehoofing. “I forgot you were sick with a fever.”

“Yeah…”

Awkward silence pervaded the area.

“Well, we won’t keep you any longer,” Bonnie jumped in, still keeping up her facade that Anon noticed was clearly not keeping up. Why were they so bothered?

Lyra smiled back. “Yeah, Anon’s been waiting for a while!”

His friendly compadre tilted her head at him. “How long were you waiting for me?”

Anon searched for some words.

Introduction, economic, expenditure… no, those words wouldn’t do.

Oh wait. He found some. “Not too long.” He had been waiting for fifteen minutes. “They were just keeping me company while I waited for you to swing on by.”

The two mares that were previously squeamish looked like they were happier than before. Did he just save their hides?

Starlight grinned. “I’m glad. Sorry, my track record hasn’t been the greatest as of late.”

“Pfft,” Anon said, waving his free hand in front of him, while Starlight nuzzled back into his side. She plopped down on her flanks as he spoke, “Your track record isn’t that bad. You’ve been on time…” He paused and counted the amount of times— “Once, so far.”

“Out of three,” Starlight mumbled, her expression falling short. “I’m going to fix this, Anon. Just gotta make sure ponies stop racing down the halls after school’s done for the day.”

“Don’t worry, I’ll wait and see,” he said with a cheeky grin of his own. “You’re going for that title, right?”

“Of course!” Starlight chirped while slightly puffing out her chest. A little tuft sprung out, and suddenly, Anon wondered why he hadn’t noticed it before when they were cuddling on his couch. “So, are you ready to head out?”

“Yeah,” Anon began, turning back to Bonnie and Lyra. “Where are we—”

Anon stopped himself dead in his tracks. “Uhh… Starlight?”

“Yeah?”

“Where did they go?”

Bonnie and Lyra had disappeared. It was like they walked away from the little scene and now it was just him and Starlight.

“They probably left after seeing us talk like this. You know how ponies are…”

“I really don’t actually. Did we put them off or something?”

Starlight sighed. “No… not you at least.” She got up and hopped off the stairs. She turned around and beckoned Anon with a hoof. “Come on, let’s go for a walk. I’ll tell you along the way.”

“Alright,” Anon replied. He walked down the remaining steps (there wasn’t much anyway) and dusted himself off. Then, he walked by her, just like last night, close together, nearly rubbing up against each other.

And he wondered if this is what it felt like to be close to someone.

“So…”

“So…”

Starlight bumped into him a bit. “You want to know how a mare talks, huh?”

“A mare… talks?”

She nodded. “That whole little interaction you saw. You’ve never seen ponies behave like that, right?”

“I think I may have seen it once before, but I never really put too much thought into it.”

“Really, you’ve seen something like that before?”

“Yep.”

“Who were you with?” Starlight asked with a raised brow.

“With Twilight. She wasn’t doing it to them at all. We actually watched it all unfold right in front of us. There were two groups of ponies: one with a stallion and three mares, the other with just two mares. One group was pestering the other about talking to the stallion in their group and—” Anon snorted. “Wow, I just realized that what you just did is really close to what they did.”

Starlight sighed. “Yeah. Sorry.”

“Sorry, for what?”

“I probably shouldn’t have pushed them away like that.”

“You pushed Bonnie and Lyra away?”

Another bob of her head. She looked away, watching for other ponies (at least, that’s what Anon thought she was doing). “Not maliciously. I was just… sending them a message.”

“What are you, the Joker?”

“Hmm?”

Anon laughed as he saw Starlight’s scrunched up muzzle.

“Are you mocking me, Anon?”

“N-No! You just reminded me of something really, really dumb.”

“So I’m dumb now?”

He laughed harder, which earned him a little bump from Starlight.

“You’re not dumb, Starlight. Honest.”

She rolled her eyes. “Sure… Is every human like you?”

“I’d hope not.”

He had said it so matter-of-factly, that it made Starlight tilt her head.

“Really?”

“Yeah. Imagine having everyone like me? I don’t think our race would’ve lasted as long as it has.”

“How long has your species lasted?”

“Somewhere in the ballpark of three hundred thousand years ago, and we’ve revolutionized our way of living in the past hundred.”

Starlight’s eyes widened. “Wait, really?”

“Yep!” he began as he sidestepped around a couple who was not paying attention to their surroundings. Starlight met right back to where she was, although she rubbed her flank toward his leg, and that made Anon confused. “Did you mean to do that?”

Starlight… blushed? “Yeah.”

He blinked. Suddenly, history didn’t seem that important.

“So…”

“So you were saying?”

And now history was important again, as they walked closer and closer to what appeared to be a park entrance. “So yeah! There’s some history that humans not of our exact race appeared six million years ago, but my specific species was only spawned three hundred thousand years ago.”

“How do you know that?”

“Me? Extensive education. My species? Digging up fossils in some cool sandpit named Africa,” Anon said, waving his hand. “Not that the whole place is filled with sand, but that’s where we originated from. Apparently one of the guys dug up this human who was breaking a leg.”

She gasped. “You’re kidding.”

He chuckled. “Maybe on that last part.”

She let out a brief blow. “You and your antics.” She turned away from Anon and gasped. “Well, it looks like we wandered into the park, didn’t we?”

“Yeah,” Anon said. “Much better than having dinner again.”

“You weren’t a fan of Lime Ayds’ cafe?”

“She’s not going to last long with those prices.”

Another blow, accompanied by a whinny. “We really need to get you better pay.”

“Tell Mayor Mare that then,” Anon retorted, which earned him a giggle-snort from Starlight. “But seriously, those prices are ridiculous. Especially for what we were given. Like, who takes a picture of a burger that’s a fifteenth of the size of the plate?”

“Some ponies do,” Starlight blandly stated. He tilted his head, which spurred her to continue, “And that’s fine. But that whole experience made me realize that you definitely are not one of those ponies.”

“Do you enjoy those types of places, Starlight?”

“No, not really. I just thought it would be good to see what you liked. I… I wanted to get to know you better.”

I wanted to get to know you better.

Those words echoed in his ears, while his heart pumped a bit loudly. “R-Really?”

“Mmhmm,” she said, her ears flopping as she trotted. “It’s good to know what your friend likes, right?”

Suddenly, his heart stopped its race, so soon after it started. “Good to know that you’re thinking that way.”

“Somepony has to.”

He nudged her on her side with a closed fist. “Goof.”

She giggled behind her hoof like the giggle monster. She stopped and nudged him with her body.

“Hmm?”

“Wanna go sit down for a bit?”

It hadn’t even registered to Anon, but in front of them, just a few steps away, was a bench. It was long, probably for more than two ponies to lay down comfortably together, and it was red. A deep red. Like a fire hydrant red. It looked like it was bolted to the ground somehow, stuck on the path with nowhere to go. A good design choice; ponies didn’t need to experience a bench suddenly flipping them into the air or sliding around everywhere. It would be a funny image just to watch one flying without wings or a parachute.

“Sure,” Anon replied.

And the two walked over, or so Anon thought. It looked like Starlight teleported herself over and situated herself on it by sitting on her flanks. There was plenty of space as a result, leaving Anon to scoot a bit closer to her.

The effect was immediate as he sat down…

She flopped into his lap and looked up at him.

His eyes widened.

“Star—”

“Bit too much?”

He was about to say something, but then he stopped himself. He looked into her eyes. How vibrant they were, and how cute they looked—

Anon mentally facepalmed. He was proving Mayor Mare right all along right now, and he felt some heat rise to the occasion on his cheeks. He was really hoping he wasn’t blushing, he wasn’t needing Starlight to pry any further.

But he looked back. No change on her face. She’s just a softly smiling, content mare laying on her back, her head placed in his lap. Her mane tickled his pants as she shifted a little, and her warmth she brought made him feel something he hadn’t felt before. Something new. Something…

“No. Everything’s fine.”

That made her smile grow. And he wondered if he could keep it that way.

“Good. I’ll stay right here then.”

Anon really started to evaluate what being a friend really meant at that moment.


Anon really took the time to understand Starlight. They have been in the park for who knows how long at this point, drifting from conversation to conversation. He lost track of what they talked about, mostly because of where she was. She was still there, her head in his lap. And he too was indulging in this by petting her mane. She had cooed at first, before telling him that he was a bit forward with how he was petting her (he had his hand graze further down her neck, which made her squeak), so he stopped and kept his hand firmly toward the top of her mane. Going any further down apparently triggered something he wasn’t ready for yet, and he definitely wasn’t wanting to find out.

His face had been on fire for what time had passed. This was definitely not what friends did. This was more like what a lover would do with their partner. And he was feeling it, feeling it in a way that he never had with Twilight, and it was weird. Weird, but welcome?

He couldn’t fit the pieces into this puzzle he called his life now. All he knew was that this accelerated past friendship and was veering into that territory. The territory that he had thought he was in before with Twilight. Before all the mixed signals. Before the rejection.

Anon hated mixed signals. He hated them a lot.

He hated them so much that he wasn’t going to push the envelope. He may just be reading into this a bit too much. Besides, it wasn’t the right time. He could ask her in a more private setting where they wouldn’t get interrupted and weren’t so out in the open. That would be fine, right?

Right?

“Say, Anon?”

“Hmm?”

She smiled. “Thanks for meeting with me today.”

He tilted his head. “You’re welcome?”

“Pfft, you sound not so sure about that.”

A shrug, followed by words. “Can’t help it. You’re being silly.”

“No I’m not,” she said.

“Yeah, you are.” He poked her muzzle with a finger. “You’re the silly one.”

Her eyes crossed, which made Anon tilt his head further. Did he do that?

“Who delivered the cookies to the third floor of the hotel?”

Strobe light Anon was in full effect. “What did you just say?”

She got up and broke the little petting session up to rapidly shake her head. She turned back to Anon, her right ear twitching. “What did you just do?”

“I poked your muzzle with one of my fingers.”

“Oh.” She suddenly turned really red. Was she angry or…? “Um…”

She twiddled with her forehooves while she bit her lip. Okay. Not angry. Just embarrassed. Great, he pushed it a bit further, didn’t he?

“Did I make you feel uncomfortable there?”

“N-No. I… I think you should save that for something else.”

“Something… else?”

She waved her forehooves in front of him. “Forget it! Forget I said that.”

“Hmm… should I?”

She growled. “You should.”

“Okay, okay!” he said, throwing his hands up into the air. “Don’t kill the innocent human. You only got one of those.”

“Magic can make cloning really easy,” Starlight said with a smirk.

“Awesome. Clone me so that way I can go home and hibernate.”

“And… now I can’t clone you.”

Anon snapped his fingers. “Missed opportunity.”

“It’s totally your fault.”

“Yep, totally.”

“Mmhmm.”

The two shared a glance.

“You good?”

“Yeah, yeah.” He checked his spleen. It was still there. “Are you?”

She nodded rather enthusiastically, but then, with a rather loud harrumph, kept herself silent, her face blank. “You want to head back?”

Anon sucked in a deep breath. She tossed the option into his lap, and quite frankly, he was okay with staying there a bit longer. After all, petting her and everything wasn’t terrible, it was just… strange. Like it was taboo for him to do even though if it was back on Earth, what he did was not even a bad thing. Well, other than those thoughts he had of her cute eyes.

Cute eyes.

Cu—

He was going to deck himself in the mouth soon.

“I’m okay with staying here a bit longer. Did you… want to talk about anything?”

“Other than your work being, well, the way it is—”

“—thanks—”

“No problem!” she cheerfully finished. He laughed. “But really, besides work, what else is there to talk about? I mean… I know we talked about your world in the past, but…”

He tapped his chin. “What do you know?”

“Your world… it’s strangely similar to ours.”

“You could say that again,” Anon murmured.

“Okay, your world is strangely similar to ours.”

“That was rhetorical—on second thought, nevermind.”

She giggle-snorted herself into falling onto his lap again. She didn’t totally eviscerate his groin or anything. Not at all! And he certainly wasn’t wincing when she did that. Had to hide the pain to not kill the moment. “Thanks, Anon.”

“You’re… eugh, welcome.”

She looked up at him with a confused look. “Something the matter?”

“No, nothing. You just keep your… your pretty head there.”

He blinked.

She blinked.

“Did you—”

“Sorry. That just slipped out.”

She smiled. “Don’t apologize. It’s okay.”

“Really?”

“Mmhmm.” She nuzzled his pant leg to emphasize how okay it was, and he was wondering if he was going to die right there. “That’s got to be a skill.”

“What is?”

“Being able to just say something like that without thinking twice.”

“It’s not a skill, trust me. My head’s empty up there.”

“Is that a roundabout way of saying you’re dumb?”

“Yes.”

She groaned. “You’re not dumb, Anon!”

“Glad someone thinks so!”

He chuckled. She laughed.

And the world of friendship swallowed them whole, neither of them noticing the ponies passing them by while the two basked in their laughter.

Author's Note:

This chapter was not part of the plan I had, by the way. Felt weird not having another chapter to bridge the gap that was between this and the last chapter.

So, here it is. 4k written and edited in three hours.

You're welcome. Hope you enjoy it!

Song for this chapter: