• Published 18th Oct 2012
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Wolverine: The Equestrian Myth - Axel IV



Wolverine finds himself in Equestria...

  • ...
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The Offer

Logan, a.k.a. Wolverine, has been a great challenge for an intellectual such as I. Throughout our many meetings he refuses to be friendly and cooperative. The subject always uses sarcasm and his sense of humor to challenge us and sometimes we do not quite understand what he is really saying. He refuses to let me or anypony touch him which proved a challenge for when my good friend Rarity was in the process of making him a shirt. He had to describe it to her and had called it a 'tank top'. The article of clothing itself is white and he seemed quite satisfied with the results. However he had not complimented the great work of my friend one bit.

I believe that the subject is actually becoming interested in Equestria. I had left a book that goes into detail about our land and I think he has been reading it... well, it could be that he has nothing else to do but read that could really be pushing him into it. Whatever the case, there is a bit of turmoil about. My friends and I desperately need to return to Ponyville. Applejack's family managed to hire extra hooves at the farm but they need her. Fluttershy is worried about her animals and Rainbow Dash is worried about her wonderbolt training. Rarity wants to work on her new line of fashion while I wish to return to Spike. I hope he's doing alright without me. Pinkie Pie is the only exception because nopony knows what she wants to do.

I don't know what will happen to Logan. I do not wish for him to be kept in the castle forever so maybe it is time to teach him about the outside world. And I believe that a hoofs on experience is the best way to go about it. I took note that the other ponies must not see him yet... but do not worry. I have a plan.




"So let me get this straight... " Wolverine said as he stared blankly at the wall in front of him. Both him and Twilight were seated on the bed by themselves. Fluttershy and Rarity were both playing chess on the table near the doorway, Rainbow Dash was flipping through the pages of a 'Wonderbolts Monthly' and both Applejack and Pinkie had been down in the castle kitchen cooking up some sweets.

"You..., " Wolverine pointed a finger at a smiling Twilight, "Want to turn me..., " he jabbed a thumb at himself, "Into one of you..., " He pointed back at Twilight.

"Well... it would only be temporary!" Twilight exclaimed, "It's not all that bad! Besides, I bet you would be a good looking pony!" Logan had to keep his jaw from dropping as Rainbow Dash snickered in the background.

"No. Way. In. Hell. " Logan grumbled, "I can't believe you even had the NERVE to ask me that, Sparky."

"Oh come on!" Rainbow Dash smirked, pulling down the magazine so that Wolverine could see her toothy smile, "It'd be funny! You could make a pretty cool pony."

"You mean I would be something that you would never be?" Logan shot back with a smile. By spending time with these ponies he was starting to understand what he had to say to get them angry.

"WHAT?!" Dash gasped, "Okay, YOU just stepped over the line!" She angrily waved her hoof, "I have my own fan club back in Ponyville, I saved the Wonderbolts at one point and I can create a sonic rainboom!"

"Sure, whatever. I bet you fly like a penguin, Rainbow Brite."

"It's RAINBOW DASH!"

"Don't let what he says get to you, darling..., " Rarity stated as she gently moved a chess piece on the checkered board, "he's just trying to get you angry."

"Yeah, " Logan nodded, "What the dog said."

"WHAT?!"

"Come on, Logan!" Twilight pleaded, "Just give this a chance! It's the only way Princess Celestia would let you walk out of here!"

Wolverine growled, "She wouldn't 'let me walk out'. I would just get thrown back in here anyway... besides, being surrounded by six of you all the time is bad enough but being surrounded by dozens of you is even worse. If I get out of here the first thing I'm doing is getting as far away as I can." Logan shifted and turned his gaze towards the window.

"Geez... " Rainbow sighed as she rubbed her temples with her hooves, "I know someponies can be difficult but this guy is like in a class of his own!" Twilight had to agree silently. It was hard trying to be friends with somebody who hated your complete existence.

"Logan, " Twilight began, "what do you really want to do? I don't think you want to stay in the castle forever and I don't think that you can survive out there by yourself... "

"I beg to differ. " Wolverine replied, "I've done it before and I can do it again."

Twilight sighed as she tapped her hoof lightly against her head. Time was running out for her and her options were limited. She didn't want to just leave him in the castle but she didn't want to just let him loose either. There was no telling what Wolverine would do if he suddenly went out into the world... not to mention that the ponies could be very fearful of him.

The door swung open and the grinning faces of both Applejack and Pinkie Pie came into view. A wonderful aroma had entered the room immediately and caused the mouths of the ponies to water. Logan had already caught its scent when they had been just coming down the hallway and he had to admit that they did smell delicious.

"Hey Logey!" Pinkie grinned, "Want to take a bite of the most scrumptious delicious and most AMAZING tasting pie ever created in the kitchen of Canterlot Castle?!"

"Sure, " Logan replied, "As long as it was baked by creatures other then technicolor ponies."

"Hm," Pinkie tapped her hoof on her chin, "THAT's going to be a toughy... can griphons bake apple pies? Well, there was that one time Gustave Le Grand baked some AMAZING éclairs..."

"What's your problem, Logan? Can't you smell how great it is?" Applejack chuckled, "Why, I bet your little belly's just achin' for a taste!"

"Actually, " Logan grinned evilly, "My 'little belly' is really aching for some... oh, I don't know... some steak."

The ponies all froze, their faces turning a dim shade of green with the thought of eating another animal. Fluttershy had frozen up, dropping her piece of pie onto the carpet.

"A nice JUICY steak just FRESHLY baked and cut from the BIGGEST cow... I can just PICTURE myself gorging on it with the red juice just trickling down my chin... oh, and that reminds me. Do you ponies have any HORSE radish?"

Fluttershy's body suddenly toppled onto the ground with her eyes frozen as they stared off into the distance. Applejack felt her breakfast and lunch starting to come up from her stomach and she noisily excused herself from the room as she bolted out the door.

"W-Well.... " Rarity whispered lightly as she pushed away her plate of pie, "I think my appetite is... forever scarred..."






"This isn't good... " Celestia said quietly to her sister as they peered into Wolverine's confined room. The ponies and the human were too busy interacting with one another to notice the powerful presence of the two princesses outside of the window.'

"Indeed, " Luna nodded, "The human can't possibly think that we will actually give him steak! That is just so... revolting! Sister, perhaps it is time to use the tofu to satisfy his-

"Dear sister, I'm not talking about the human's appetite." Celestia chuckled lightly, making her sister flush a shade of red in embarrassment.

"Er, yes... of course not... " Luna shook her head, her blush fading. "You are talking about the dark presence that has been creeping up on the castle recently. I too have felt its strange aura."

"Yes, " Celestia's eyes narrowed, "I cannot place where it is coming from. It is obvious that it's because of Logan's arrival in the castle. Something is reacting to him being here and we need to find out what."

"Whatever it is it has been trying to interfere with my magical barrier. Twilight is powerful but also naive... I doubt that she has noticed its dark touch that has been encasing the room." Luna stated as she watched the purple unicorn try to shake the unconscious Fluttershy awake. She couldn't help the small smile tugging the corner of her mouth.

"Luna, I wish to give you an important task... I'm not ordering you but I'm asking you." Celestia said quietly, her eyes meeting her sister's.

"You wish for me to find the source of this dark energy, correct?" Luna replied as she turned her gaze back to Logan, "You did not need to ask, Celestia."

"I'm too busy with royal duties to solve this problem myself." Celestia sighed, "And I need to decide what to do with Logan when it is time for the elements themselves to depart. We cannot keep him in the castle nor can we let him go. He is still dangerous and we don't know his true potential."

"Years ago we would have used a spell to look into the minds of criminal ponies," Luna stated, "What is stopping us now?"

"It is an invasion of privacy, not to mention our emotions are linked. His pain will be our pain and his anger will be our anger. And by the looks of him... he has been through much pain and anger." Celestia bit her lip, "My mind is weary with all this stress... I shall retire to my room for a bit." Celestia gave her sister a bright smile, "Luna, I trust your decision. Please do what must be done." Luna watched her sister take off, her wings flapping brilliantly in the sunlight as she flew to her tower.

"Right... " Luna said to herself, "do what must be done... "




Logan roared, his sharp blades slicing through the blankets as he abruptly sat up in the bed. Sweat was pouring down his skin in streams as he panted, his breath being so warm that he could see it in the air. He took a few moments to collect himself before his sharp claws retracted into his fists. He cursed at himself, running his hands through his brown hair.

"Damnit... again?... " He asked himself. He shook the nightmare out of his head as he composed himself.

Sighing, he pushed the blankets off of himself before noticing something odd. Blinking, he brought his wrists to his face. The glowing shackles that had restricted his wrists were gone. He was far too wary to be happy.

"Okay..." He growled to himself, "Something's up... and I don't like it." He stood up and made his way to the door. He hesitated before he gripped the cold door knob. The door opened without a hitch and he took a step through it.

"So the barrier's gone too... " he said out loud. The hallway was dark and cold, and he sniffed the air.

There were no guards in sight and he couldn't smell anything. What was going on here?...

Logan...

Wolverine immediately turned stiff, his metal claws emerging from his knuckles. The voice came like a whisper and echoed in his head. It seemed like some sort of telepathy.

"Who's there?... " Logan snapped into the darkness, "Show yourself!"

Down the hallway... to the left...

Wolverine hesitated before he snarled, "Alright... When I find you I'll kick your ass... " His claws withdrew back into his skin before he set off into the dark castle.

Logan knew that this had to be some sort of a trap. The voice was leading him through the dark castle which suspiciously had no guards posted. The torches were all extinguished and his sense of smell was somehow being blocked. The air was cold and his instincts were warning him of what was to come.

Through the door...

The voice had led him to a huge set of double doors. He was able to see it because of his super-human sight but that didn't mean that he could see straight through the dark. He could see stars twinkling through the windows outside. He wondered how late it was.

Approaching the large doors, he laid his palm flat against the wood and pushed. The doors creaked open loudly, and revealed the outside world to him. The night air was chilly and refreshing and he could feel a light breeze softly against his skin. His sense of smell was still strangely blocked.

Into the garden...

The door led him into some sort of botanical paradise. The flowers were blooming and wonderful even in the moonlight, and the birds were chirping pleasantly in the cold air. Tightening his hands into fists he began to enter what he believed was the Canterlot Gardens.

He had to admit that the nature in Equestria was much more beautiful that the nature he remembered. Everything seemed to tranquil and peaceful to him. The breeze through the leaves were soothing and the soft grass beneath his feet was well kept and soft. The animals were keeping their distance but they were lively and happy. He was truly in a wonderfully magical place.

He hated it.

His feet led him to the center of the gardens, a strange patch of glowing yellow flowers, and finally stopped him before a large stone statue. A very ugly large stone statue that looked like some sort of strange chimera. It's face was contorted to an expression of horror and he couldn't place what sort of creature it was. Was this a monument of some sort or was this just some terrible taste in art?

"Discord... We should have known."

Wolverine gritted his teeth in reaction to the familiar voice. He heard the sounds of hooves against grass as the being came up from behind him.

"I knew that this was too good to be true... " Logan growled, his gaze still on the statue as the alicorn strode up beside him, "Being released from that horrible room just to be brought in front of some ugly form of modern art."

"This is not some statue created by an artist of unsavory taste, " Luna replied, "This statue holds the spirit of chaos within. Discord."

"Spirit of chaos?... So this world is like some badly written fantasy story then." Logan shook his head, "At least we agree on one thing... this statue looks like it was sculpted by a kid. What is it anyway? Some sort of goat?"

"The term is draconequus." Luna replied, "He has the head of a pony while his body is made from other different things."

"Heh. So like a platypus. I get it." Wolverine nudged his head to the side as a loud crack echoed from the bones in his neck. With a sigh he turned his body to face the princess.

"So this 'spirit of chaos' led me here? Did he also break the magic you placed on the room and my handcuffs?" Logan cracked his knuckles.

"No. That was my doing." Luna answered, "Discord's magic is just a whisper of its former self. While he is able to speak to you with a form of telepathy he cannot interfere with my own spells. I needed to know who or what released you. It was a bit of a gamble but I knew that you would be led to the source."

"So that's why all the guards and lights were out." Logan snarled quietly, "Did you also turn off my sense of smell or something?"

"Oh, no. I just burned incense that has a lasting numbing effect on creatures with heightened sense of smell. The effect should wear off in a few hours." Luna shifted her gaze towards the wary Logan.

"So you used me to find the boss, eh? Crafty, I'll give you that." Logan smirked, "But what makes you think that I'll go back to the room willingly? I have a taste of freedom for the first time. Why would I want to go back to your silly little castle?"

Luna batted her wings , "I didn't take you lightly, Logan." Logan heard a few rustling noises and looked around him. Out of nowhere a mob filled with dozens of ponies in spiky silver armor had surrounded him. They were in the trees, in the grasses, and were also behind the statue.

"Outnumbered, eh?" Wolverine chuckled to himself, "But not outmatched."

"Before you make an arrogant move, listen to what I have to say." Luna moved her front hoof in an arc around her and motioned to the guards.

"These are my lunar ponies." Luna began, "Celestia has her royal guard and I have them. Her royal guards guard the castle at all times and are the first called to combat if the need arises. I am in charge of the lunar ponies and their job is much more dangerous."

"They're all little girl creatures to me," Logan smirked as he flicked one in the nose. The stallion grunted, gritting his teeth as he tried to stay composed.

"They may seem so but my lunar ponies are warriors. This world may look perfect, Logan, but alas it is not so. There are dangerous creatures lurking within horrifying places such as the Everfree Forest. These monsters threaten ponykind. What keeps them at bay are my lunar ponies. When a potentially dangerous monster is on the move towards a pony settlement they take care of it. If there is to be an attack my lunar ponies are dispatched to take care of it before it happens. We work in the shadows to keep Equestria safe."

"Sounds like you're busy giving them false hope." Wolverine shook his head, "And I doubt that you ponies don't exterminate these monsters completely anyway."

"We... do not..." Luna sighed, "It is frowned upon to take the life of another living being. My lunar ponies are tasked with leading the monsters away or to avoid killing by fighting. It is very dangerous."

"And what does this have to do with me?" Logan inquired as he crossed his arms, "I don't see your point."

Luna approached Logan, lifting her head to tower above his, "Logan, there are creatures out there... creatures that have appeared that could easily brush away us ponies. Monsters that could destroy a pony village with a blink of an eye. Monsters that could inspire fear in our ponies... monsters that we haven't seen before. They are creatures we can't simply hope to defeat with our method of sparing lives... but you are different."

"Wait... " Logan blinked, "You're saying... you want me to fight these things for you?"

Luna took a deep breath, "There is always darkness creeping upon Equestria... And with my recent transformation back from Nightmare Moon more trouble seems to be brewing. Our castle was attacked by changelings and Discord had emerged from his prison. I fear that even more evil will be crawling to Equestria."

"Yeah? Well sorry, princess. I don't plan on helping out any of you ponies out. Go back to your stables, Princess Moonbeams." A few lunar ponies twitched as his remark but they held their composure.

"Logan, if you agree to become my warrior, I can promise you that we will give you freedom." Luna stood firm, "When your duties are finished there will no longer be anything to hold you here. You may go out into the world and do whatever you may desire."

Logan held an angry glare with Luna before smiling, "Freedom? Aren't I free now? Looks like all I have to do is beat down you and your guards and I can go. And THAT sounds like a much better deal."

"Trust me," Luna giggled a little, "That isn't going to work." Logan raised an eyebrow as his sharp blades extended out from his fists.

"Oh really?" Logan growled, "Want to show me why?"

Luna smirked and pointed to the ground at Logan's feet, "You have been standing in 'Paralysis Pedals' for our entire conversation. I have to admit that while it takes ponies just a few seconds to be effected it took you nearly ten minutes. That's enough to take out an Ursa Minor."

"What?..." Wolverine blinked, "What are you saying? I can move just- One of Logan's legs refused to budge and he fell onto his back right on top of the flowers.

"You know... I was planning on you fighting against my lunar ponies... but I remembered that we keep these plants positioned around Discord's statue."

"Are you serious..." Logan could no longer budge his arms and his legs were just like statues. He snarled at himself as he tried to thrash around.

"You finished?" Luna asked with a smile.

"The first thing... I'm going to do when I get free... is kill your gardener... " Logan growled as his body was lifted by Luna's magic.

"Think about my offer, Logan." Luna chuckled as Logan's body hovered harmlessly over the earth.






"Was that a smart decision, Luna?" Celestia flipped through the white documents while giving her sister a curious glance. "You DO realize that even if he does agree there is a chance of him just leaving?..."

"I did consider that, dear sister." Luna sighed as she seated herself beside Celestia, "It was a very difficult decision and it was very risky. I would not want to fight against that human... I was worried that the paralysis pedals were not going to effect him at all. It is a rather cowardly move but I did not want to risk any deaths of my lunar ponies. Even with me there it would be very difficult."

"That is all very true... but what are you going to do to keep him... in lack of a better term, in control?" Celestia signed her last paper and breathed out in relief as the stack disappeared in a flash of magic.

"It's not going to be simple, " Luna admitted, "But there is one thing I can do-

The sound of bright brass trumpets echoed throughout the castle as they blazed the happy tune. The two sisters audibly groaned as they brought their front hooves to their temples. It was late at night and there couldn't have been a worse time for this.

"Sister, I thought you sent him to Manehattan with our relatives..." Luna hissed through her teeth.

"I forgot to tell you that they kicked him out..." Celestia answered back as she composed herself, "I was too busy with important royal duties to keep him away forever..." The familiar sound of the throne room doors signified its opening. Celestia and Luna put on their best fake smiles.

"Good Evening... Prince Blueblood..." Celestia greeted in her fake, happy voice. The stallion strolled into the room with an aura of a stuck-up rich kid about him. His mane was well combed as usual and his signature bow-tie was present. One of the servants painstakingly rolled out a red carpet that he stepped on during his walk to the throne.

"Hello Aunt Celestia... and Aunt Luna..." Blueblood said Luna's name with a hint of disgust. Luna's fake smile twitched as she attempted to control her annoyance.

"It's... good to see you again, Blueblood." Luna replied, "What brings you to Canterlot so... late in the evening?"

"Manehattan was just dreadful!" Blueblood stomped his hoof, "The city smelled of commoners, the food was much to be desired, and our relatives are corrupted and arrogant! They do not see my full potential as a prince!" Even Luna was impressed that somepony had an ego that surpassed Rainbow Dash's... but in a bad way.

"Not only that, but I heard that there was some trouble in the castle so I hurried back." Blueblood said, "Something about a... bipedal monster running about?"

Luna and Celestia shared a worried glance.