• Member Since 28th Sep, 2011
  • offline last seen 11 minutes ago

shortskirtsandexplosions


space is a waste

T

My name is Short Skirts and Explosions, and I write a lot of crap.

That said, here's a collection of incomplete stories and/or rough drafts of stories that I would eventually improve into final drafts worthy of Fimfiction and Equestria Daily. This is by no means supposed to add canonical weight to any of the other drivel that I have written, but rather it's meant to show off lengthy pieces of literature that I've poured my heart and soul into, regardless of how much they might suck the proverbial teat of lameness. The material provided here is either stuff that I won't release in complete form, or is writing that is so incredibly different from the final drafts that they almost feel like completely separate stories on their own. Sometimes I like to share the worst I have to offer, as well as the best. Dislike to your heart's content, or else enjoy the junk for what it is.

Chapters (45)
Join our Patreon to remove these adverts!
Comments ( 116 )

pretty legit stuff.
Oh, and beware my original comment:
cool story bro.

Short? SHORT? Dear Celestia HOW LONG DOES THIS TAKE YOU?
You're, like, an anti-black-hole of words. They just keep coming, and coming, and coming...

I don't think I can read these. Story fragments give me psychotic breaks with reality. Also I feel bad. Urg what to do.

And here I thought I was gonna have some free time to do things wholly unrelated to literature.

...

Welp.

well. you got my attention. the worst of your best? I'll read this, if only just to see where i measure up.

Will you post the original Petra arc here too?
I've already read it, but still, it'd be fun to see it posted here.

1385067

Not until after the legit arc is up. That's almost the entire reason this is up here.

I'm replying to a comment. Wat.

Huh, interesting. Gotta say, I'm a fan of the final couple of paragraphs of this original ending, definitely somewhat more poignant than the finalized version.

Goddamn, having such vocal pre-readers must be bittersweet at times.

You can't write anything short, can you? Even your scraps total over 100k words! You, sir, are ridiculous in the best way possible. :moustache:

wow this would be a great new story it would i think be as big probably as backround pony or even better

Upvoted hard. I'll binge on this later.

First good Mark Twain reference I've seen here since [some vague date in the past].

That was pretty good. I can see why Vimbert kinda raged, though. The trolls got downgraded from an actual threat to a minor nuisance. It was mostly jarring specifically because we'd already seen what the trolls did in the previous chapters. In any case, this was a good reason to reread a chapter of End of Ponies, so I'm alright with it!

>Implying that SS&E writes short stuffs.

1386637
Seriously! I doff my hat to the glorious madness of it :ajsleepy:

:ajsmug:

Skirts, that feeling you have towards Pinkie Pie? That's how I am all the goddamned time when Rarity is on the screen, whether in the show or in a fanfic.

1385765
We only beat him because we love him.

CANCELLED?!
NO! :flutterrage:
:pinkiecrazy:, GET OUT THE COOKIE DOUGH! I HAVE ANOTHER ADDRESS FOR YOU!

"It's dangerous business walking into doors.”

:facehoof::facehoof::facehoof::facehoof:

Ezn

Hehe, I remember reading this one when you dropped it in Vim's thread. I found it pretty amusing and agree that it might be a cool/funny idea to do someday – if I'm going to read anyone's "human is transported to Equestria and faffs about with the mane six" story, it's going to be yours... especially since Lyra could just be insane.

Still, if writing this to completion meant you wouldn't have written Background Pony then I'm glad this was DoA.

Honestly, this story is really great, the only problem I have (and likely the reason it got cancelled, don't fully remember) is that it's not really 'I Remember Rainbow Dash'. Still, it'd work well as a story. Though, you've got enough on your plate.

Ah, there's another reason this'll never be finished: Rainbow Dash remembers Lyra exists.

By the way, what was going to happen to Trixie?

This is incredibly silly.
And I love it.

heheh. Pretty funny. Even in such bizarre circumstances, you write for the Mane 6 so very well. You have a great understanding of their reactions and the way each of them speak. Heck, I even laughed at the bashes on Rarity.

And I loved that you included the notes at the end. I'm glad I'm not the only one who does that sort of thing so vaguely. "Lyra and Twilight have a moment" would be great, I can just tell. My favorite note was "Lyra and Ditzy (“Who's this moron and why would I want her muffin?”)" XD Intelligent Dizty Doo, FTW!

I like these. On a side note, the title should have been "Short Scraps and Exclusions"

Oh... I read this! You Google Doc'd this to us a long time ago in your blarghs, and I totally read the first 2 or 3 chapters. Sweet! Great to have it on FiMFiction where it's easier to track.

I look forward to seeing why it's such a bad story, because I remember liking what I read. :ponkyshrug:

Yeah, I've read this one too. Scootaloo's machine (and her in the tree) were very funny to me. If I remember right... maybe I should glance over it again.

wow. really sad here. really liked it but really sad.

I actually liked this ending just as much as the official one.

Ha! I am loving this.

You're right, of course, it's pretty bad. Not really the story or anything, but just some of the quirks of its writing. Like the endless ellipses and the weird parentheticals. Heheh...

It's all kind of endearing, though. It's like reading the works of a younger SS&E, when he was just a baby brony. Spelling Applejack as two words... calling them "cutie marks" on one pony... Rainbow living in Cloudsdale and acting like she doesn't really love her Ponyville friends... Pffffff. And what's with all the CAPS??? That's not Skirtsy!!

Nah, but I like it. It's cute. Still not totally sure where it's going, though I'm happy to see Rainbow's dad here. That's sure different. And it makes me think back to that harrowing opener...

Anyway... I'm glad you got better with time and hundreds as thousands of poniponiponi words! :raritywink:

I gave up shortly after Bon Bon's and Amethyst Star's Sparkler's introduction. Good god was that out of place. There were too many unnecessary characters speaking and being introduced, and it felt like the dialogue was being juggled by a bear on a unicycle who didn't know how to juggle nor ride a unicycle yet its trainer kept throwing it more things to juggle. I'm going to take your word for it that this draft is atrocious, and meanwhile I'll go praise Worsty for basically slapping you across the face.

wat?

Kinda glad this wasn't published, the first third seemed like a short story about the absurdity of living as a background pony in ponyville during the first season. And they mentioned discord, which would have messed up the continuity of the story unless this was supposedly far in the future. And then the rest was a brow-beating from a snarky Lyra, which then ended and you realized nothing happened through 10,000 words.

:yay:

I gave up too, well before Raz. The very first paragraph had me cracking up from over-the-topness. Huzzah for Worsty! heeheehee

I've said before how much I like Chapter 10, and I'll say it again here. I know you said you didn't enjoy writing it but that was my absolute favorite chapter. I read it over and over again and it pretty much motivated me to stick with the story for the next ten. I realize it is an extreme departure from the style of the rest of the story, what with the randomness and humor, but in a way I think the chapter showcases what everyone loves so much about the story. It shows Lyra using her willpower and resourcefulness to overcome her curse's limitations, and live happily despite it all!

I love how you made fun of your own overwrought philosophical introductory journal entries, and how pinkie lampshaded how pretty words alone couldn't actually change someone's lifelong attitude.

I love the continuity, like Morning Dew's flower and Alabaster's revelations. But curse-related aspects were in the background, making this feel like a slice of life between the big, horrifying revelations. It reinforces the idea that despite all hardships Lyra does LIVE, which is a triumph to be celebrated!

Finally, I love how in the end it was Lyra who was dragging along a confused Pinkie Pie, Lyra having swung from the melancholic extreme to the energetic one.
And more Bonbon is always good!

I didn't get even half of the references (EoP is still in my "to read" list), but it still makes me laugh and inspires me every time I read that chapter. I hope you can look back at it more fondly, because it has some of my favorite moments from any story ever, poniponi or no poni..

It could have been a thing.

So much falling... falling.... falling.... hurr hurr.

Though, overall still managed to do the same thing as the original ending (damn, been a year since I read that and I'm even now having to look it up).

Good to see you put these alternate chapter things up here to show how alternatively (terrible?) things could have been. Not too many authors do that sort of thing. And also I wonder how you managed to spit out 250k words on pinkie-dedicated chapters, despite your hatred for her. Maybe it's a public denial, where your subconscious secretly loves her to death? Who knows.

Hm... strange. I actually liked this version quite a bit. I like treebeardesque type dialogues; I just always find them interesting if they're written with ramblings that would, well, be interesting to hear if one really wanted to hear the whole story behind something: in this case, Spike's experience with time travel and a bit more info with Scoots' past in the wasteland (I think? Too lazy to check).

Eyy... I had a fic like this once. This looks like my first Pokemon fics. Self-insert middle schooler fics are funny.
This one makes me laugh.

Eyy... I had a fic like this once. This looks like my first Pokemon fics. Self-insert middle schooler fics are funny.
This one makes me laugh.

Login or register to comment
Join our Patreon to remove these adverts!