How to Disappear Completely4,730 words

I Remember Rainbow Dash pt 1

I became a brony around late July or early August of 2011, and I immediately kamikaze'd myself into word processor nirvana. The result was... this thing. For two solid weeks of mania, I slammed together a wall of text expressing my deep and unfiltered joy of magical talking equines.

Please understand me. This is not a good fanfic. Rainbow Dash is horribly out of character and I knew it. The pace crawls like a diabetic slug. There are comic book style fight scenes between horses. Grammar, punctuation, and common decency are all butchered. I have no spaces in between paragraphs. Scootaloo is as annoying as a bag full of dying cats.

All of this--in the glory of a technicolor yawn--was forced down the throat of Vimbert, an unimpressive gentlecolt who at the time was gracefully providing his services to random marsupials wanting to be great lemurs of poni poni writing. I slapped a bunch of documents together and shoved them his way,, and that's how I learned what a "Vindictive Review" is. Long story longer, the very fact that he still speaks to me these days--much less lends his talents to the improvement of The End of Ponies--is a testament to his integrity, patience, and overall awesomeness. That still doesn't change the fact that he produced several new rectums in my fleshy ego from the heated lacerations of his righteous fury.

That said, I look back at this shiet and I can't help but smile. Yes, it's atrocious. Yes, everypony is disastrously out of character. But goddayum did I have fun writing it, even if it turned out completely pointless and a waste of my time. I was so high off of ponies at the time that I wrote this, and I think it shows. If anything, it may be worth perusing for a chuckle or two.

I still think the fic as a whole would have been fantastic. It had a great idea, and I almost wouldn't mind attempting it again someday with some actual focus and commitment. But at the time, it was an utter bomb, and I was this close to hopping out of the MLP fanfiction world altogether, if it weren't for Vimbert's words of encouragement and a pathetic little backup plan I had in my head called "The Last Pony."

I Remember Rainbow Dash – by short skirts and explosions
Act 0 – Chapter 1 – Prologue

(Sixteen years ago...)

Under the cover of blue hazy night, partially obscured by the flanking treetops of the Everfree Forest, a rickety dilapidated stable rested within a sea of overgrown grass, no more than a neglected mile from the outskirts of Ponyville. The ram-shackled wooden building was an insult to architecture, but it was also a relic of the past; leftovers from a time when pioneering Earth Ponies rushed to settle a colony in the Central Plain of Equestria under the impending threat of a vicious winter. That, of course, was an uncountable number of decades ago, and the colonizing farmers from Manehattan eventually concentrated their settlement on the river tributary located several trots to the east. And while some ponies felt that the abandoned hovels of the past necessitated razing, it was the overall decision of the subsequent generations to leave them standing—in spite of their disrepair. These random and lonely structures would serve as monuments—silent and ghostly monuments of the Earthen resolve to survive—even to this day.

But on that night, this 'monument' was anything but silent. As a full moon rose high in the purple sky, its blighted Mare-Stare spilling ivory beams over the rotting stable's crooked doors, a shrill scream emanated from within. It was a cry of pain, of desperation; and it shook the leaves loose from the borders of the Everfree Forest, sending even the darkest creatures of the night scurrying into deeper shadows. It was the cry of a mother giving birth.

Inside a lone stable in a corner of the wooden building, she laid on her side, twitching and writhing under the amber-red dance coming from a single oil lamp dangling off a crossbeam above her. The white of her coat turned into a porcelain sheen as her perspiration built into a cascade. Violet eyes twitched as another labor pain wracked through her, and the young mare's green mane tossed as she let out another cry against the rattling walls of the place.

The mother wasn't alone. A soft patter of hooves, and a young stallion Pegasus orbited to her frontside. Having laid down the last straws of a bed of fresh hay—carted in from the main village—the winged gentlecolt turned his snout to a pale of fresh water positioned by the stable. Soaking a washcloth, he gently dabbed the sweat out of the foaling mare's eyes before laying the cloth on a nearby beam, freeing his mouth to talk.

“That's it, Iris. H-Hang in there, honey.” The stammer in his soft voice betrayed his courage, as did the complexion of his frazzled white mane and azure coat. But nonetheless he narrowed his brown eyes and gazed at her with hardened sincerity. “I know it hurts. But we're going to make it through this! We've got everything we need and--”

“Th-That's not it, Blue!” She wheezed at him and clenched her eyes as another contraction ripped through her. Her front hooves curled up and her legs stretched out as a gentle hiss from deep within her bubbled to the surface in the form of an air-hurdling sob. A gasp, and her moist eyes reopened, reflecting his concerned face doubly. “It's b-been well beyond fifty m-minutes! Nnnngh—M-Most foalings only--” She hyperventilated, writhed, and caught her breath again. “--only l-last half an hour t-tops! You know this as well as I do! Nnnghh—Ugh!”

“I-I'm sure it's j-j-just because it's a m-month overdo! Uh—Uh....” Blue trotted back and forth, around her, bumping once or twice into the wooden stable—so that the lamp's penumbra wobbled over them like a sickly crimson spotlight. “Mmmm-Uh—R-R-R-Remember Mrs. Pie's second d-daughter? That foal t-t-took the better part of the night to deliver--”

“Blue! This is different!” Iris spat, fell back into another contraction—and moaned her head back up to gaze sweatily at him. As he once again dabbed her forehead, she panted, swallowed, and finally managed to utter: “I-I can feel it! Something's wrong! I...I-I'm scared, Blue. I don't want us to lose this foal....”

Blue gulped. His eyes were concave. “Iris, y-you mustn't lose hope--”

“Ugh!” She collapsed fully on her side once more. Blue steadied her as she gasped and groaned: “It w-wasn't hope that got us here!”

“But it's what can get us through this!” Blue seethed through his teeth, trying in vain to weather the convulsions coming out of his mate. His eyes narrowed as his gaze melted beyond the halo of amber lamplight. “Besides, it's all we have now.” He blinked. “Unless....”

“B-Blue...?” Iris struggled to look at him.

His jaw clenched tight. With a deep breath, he said “Let me fly to Ponyville Hospital. I'll wake Dr. Canterstitch.”

“No--”

“I'll bring him here, Iris.”

“No, Blue--”

“We need all the help we can get!”

She practically snarled at him this time: “I want our foal coming into this world alive—but it's just as important for it to be free!”

“Iris, we kept this secret long enough. But for the foal's sake--”

“For the foal's sake, we won't let her live a life of shame!” Iris shrieked. After a sharp wave of pain, she fluttered down on a wheezing breath and gazed gently at him. “Now go and take a close look. Tell me what you see.”

Blue stared at her, the tips of his mane telegraphing his deeply rooted trembling. A strong breath, and he bowed his snout briefly before trotting toward the opposite side of the stable. Iris laid down and took several deep breaths. She stretched her body out and tightened her jaw against the scratchy bed of hay as her mate examined her.

“This will only take a second.”

Iris hoarsely replied: “Looks like the months of teaching you a bedside manner paid off.” She tried to smile, but it came out as a grimace. The seconds ticked away, and she started to grow uneasy. Even in the absence of an agonizing contraction, she twitched and shivered as if she was being stabbed in the heart. “Bl-Blue?” She called out, gulping. “What do you see?”

“Iris...” He stood up and brushed aside her tightly-tied tail to gaze at her. His azure face was pale, like a ghost. Nevertheless, he bravely fought the creased shadows in his expression away as he said “I'm seeing its hindquarters. It's a breech, Iris. It's a breech foaling.”

She blinked at him once, and then her face melted as she gazed away towards the far end of the stable, a squeal ripping up to the surface of her lips to form a sob: “Oh no. Oh goddess no.”

“Hey!” Blue immediately trotted over to her frontside. “Hey-Hey—Honey.”

“No no no no—Goddess, no...” She half-wailed.

“Shhh...Darling, look at me...” He kissed and licked her face before pressing his snout against hers so that their eyes met. “Look at me and listen.”

She gazed back, sniffling.

He smiled in spite of the trembles. “All is not lost. Yes, it's a breech foaling—But we're going to get through this. All three of us. We're going to have a family—Alright?”

“Blue, do you have any idea how hard it is to--?”

“No. No I don't. That's why we're going to work through this together. You are strong, Iris—Look at me. You are strong, and I am never leaving your side. Ever. I love you, honey, and I'm going to see you through this.”

She gulped and shuddered as another wave of pain started to froth from within. “O-Okay....”

“Now.” He took a deep breath and narrowed his eyes. “Tell me, Iris. Tell me what I need to do.”

The white mare groaned and gazed back towards the dramatic half of the stable. “You....nnngh....fuuu....mmm—Y-You need to grasp its hind legs and---Nnngh--P-P-Pull them away from my tail.”

He nodded rapidly and dashed over towards her other end. “Okay....Okay...”

“G-Gently...” She hissed and rode a rising contraction. “Nnnngh—I....I—nnngh--w-will try to signal you when it is time to grasp its hooves--”

Suddenly, there was a tremendous pounding noise on the front side of the dilapidated stables. Three resounding thunders—anything but natural. Both ponies jolted with a conjoined gasped, their wide eyes twitching across the haze of the lamp that now wobbled above their manes. For the briefest moment, the dark night's silence permeated the scene, and then the three knocks repeated themselves, this time accompanied by a muffled shout: “Open these doors in the name of the Ponyville Police!”

“G-Goddess...” Iris murmured. “Blue, were we followed?”

“Impossible!” Stammered Blue. “Nobody lives within a stone's throw of the trail we took through Everfree! I wouldn't have picked it otherwise!”

“Mmm-nnngh-AHH!” Iris shrieked suddenly as the pain overtook her. Blue clutched to her, his head caught in a vicious juggling act between glancing at his mate's foaling and staring disbelievingly at the building's doors. The rusty air rumbled between the mare's screams and the angry shouts from outside. For the briefest moment, Blue's eyes fell onto a noticeably sharp farming tool resting against a wall within hoof's reach--

But then the doors finally burst open. The moonlight poured in and bled the silhouettes of at least half a dozen Earth Ponies, plus one Unicorn. Without delay, they marched determinedly into the center of the antique stables—their angry eyes pouring left and right across the obviously occupied interior. Blue wasted no moment in charging up on his hooves. Iris briefly cried out for him, but he was soon stomping up towards the sudden herd, his brown eyes burning in anger.

“What are you doing here, Sheriff Amble?”

The middle-aged stallion in question balked at the azure Pegasus. “I should be asking the same of you, Mr. Farrier. No sooner than an hour ago, I get a report of an unwarranted foaling within the limits of my jurisdiction! It goes beyond saying that to hear of such a thing at this hour of the night makes my blood boil! I expected more of you, Blue.”

“What's g-going on here is none of your concern, Sheriff!” Blue shouted.

“I should say it is, Mr. Farrier,” uttered a voice from the back of the herd. The Unicorn silhouette trotted into view. In the revealing moonlight, Blue was horrified to recognize the elderly face of a certain physician. “As a matter of fact, it's naturally the concern of all of Equestria!”

“Dr. Canterstitch!” Blue Farrier recoiled. “But....B-But how...?”

“You think a physician of my distinguished experience couldn't tell that Dr. Iris was close to foaling?” The pony in question waved his horn haughtily before Blue's snout. “I must say, she did a remarkable job hiding it for so long. In our day and age, that's hardly a crime. But to think—when Nurse Heart told me of the truly heinous nature of the fair doctor's conception--” He snorted viciously, his gray mane flaring in the starlight. “Nnnngh—Words can't describe how much my blood boiled.”

Blue's features visibly sagged. “Rose Heart....N-No....” He murmured his thoughts aloud. “Iris trusted you...”

“Bl-Blue...?” The white mare choked and wheezed from the far stable. “Wh-What is happening? What are they here for?”

Dr. Canterstitch resumed his monologue as if he never had the chance to finish it. “And so, I took it upon myself to do the just thing—And report to Sheriff Amble here the breach of law that has been illicitly hidden from public eye for so long! If you have any care for Dr. Iris' well being, or for your foal's future, you will step aside.” The elderly doctor glanced at the Sheriff. Amble nodded back and motioned with a hoof, signaling two strong-bodied officers to march forward.

“NO!” Blue was suddenly in front of him, both of his sapphire wings stretched outward so that their vision of the mare was utterly blocked. “You will not take any trot forward!”

“Blue, son....” Sheriff Amble groaned exasperatingly before summoning forth an authoritarian glare. “You know the law--”

“And I know that it is an absurd law!” Blue shouted. “A vicious, prejudiced, and heartless law! Please—Don't do this! There are enough complications with the foaling as it is! Please—I beg of you! Have mercy! Where's your equinanity?”

“Mercy?” Dr. Canterstitch practically guffawed. “Mr. Farrier, if you and Iris had done the right thing and put this into the hooves of her fellow practicians instead of eloping with her to this Celestia-forsaken den of ill-repute, then any and all complications would have been expertly dealt with—complications which, might I add, are solid proof that the two of you should not have embarked upon this gross molestation of the natural order to begin with!”

Blue Farrier practically snarled: “If Iris gave birth in a 'normal' hospital, savages like you would have just taken the foal away!”

Canterstitch's eyes were ice cold. “And who says that is still not going to happen?”

The azure Pegasus gasped sharply at that, his eyes twitching. In the space of that breath of comprehension, Sheriff Amble once more signaled to his officers. The two police ponies resumed their brisk march to the rear of the stable. Somewhere in the middle of that, Blue snapped out of it—only to snap in a different way. With a high volumed “Get AWAY from her!” he flapped his wings and barreled snout-first into one policepony's flank before swiveling about in mid hover and bucking his hooves violently into the other's backside. The stables were filled with the thunder of crashing wooden beams and tossed hay as the madness unfolded.

Iris fought the pain and craned her neck to make sense out of the ensuing bedlam. From her anguished position, she could only make out thrashing shadows of angry equine in the crossover of amber and ivory haze. The mare's vision blacked out briefly as a sudden coldness rose up from her soul, wafting over her pained body in icy fingers of dread. The cloud cleared just as briefly as it overcame her, and then her violet eyes twitched to register the stampede of three more officers from the outside. They converged on her blue Pegasus mate, and still two of them were knocked senselessly towards the walls by the brave thrashing of his wings.

But the fight was half as effective as it was noble, and in under the span of a minute, Blue was subdued. Sheriff Amble's officers pressed him hard to the ground as he snarled and grunted in a few last ditch efforts to buck them off. He stared—bruised and teary eyed—as his gaze once again fell on his beloved. “Nnngh—It's okay, Iris! Don't panic! The foal will be--” His desperate voice was cut short as the officers flung bits and a bridle over his mouth. “Mmmmff—Mmmmff!”

“Bl-Blue!” Iris shrieked, howled—her front hooves kneading the naked air. “Oh Goddess, no—Get off him! Please!”

With taut ropes shackling his snout and binding his wings, Sheriff Amble and four other ponies dragged the Pegasus off, thrashing and bucking—his shouts sounding like somepony's tortured screams from underwater, growing distant as he was yanked out of the stables and into the purple night of cold Equestria beyond. Dr. Canterstitch stared boredly at the forced exit. The old Unicorn shook his head and marched slowly over towards Iris' stable, his gaze suddenly mimicking that of a shamed father.

“Tsk-Tsk-Tsk. I knew it was strange for a Pegasus like Farrier to be so fixated on working at an Earth Pony hospital. But in spite of how things have turned out, I am not a pony without decency.” He knelt down beside her, his horn glowing as several pieces of the foaling equipment hovered magically around the two of them. “Let's keep our minds on the task at hand, Dr. Iris, for this foal's sake. You're in capable hooves; I may yet be able to salvage the abomination that you and Mr. Farrier so irresponsibly set forth on.” But as the 'good' doctor narrowed his gaze, his expression turned grim. “Oh dear—What have we here, a breech? My My....Looks like he wasn't exaggerating...”

Iris was barely registering the Unicorn's words. As soon as Blue had left her sight, all color began leaving as well. The pain in her womb was starting to subside—and yet she could still feel her hind legs twitching. Her body was going numb, and this far into the foaling, she didn't need her medical degree to know what was happening. By the time the lamplight faded into an obsidian obscurity, Iris lost all sense of gravity. In that cold penumbra between the stars and oblivion, the young maiden mare floated—and every heartbeat was like an enormous thunder, growing ghostly distant with each haunting repetition.

Something that felt like eyes rolled back in her sockets. The world spun and unraveled her body like yarn. Iris knew she only had two or three breaths left to her—and in the coldest nights of fear and faith, nights of cuddling under the stars with Blue and giggling over their future, nights of staring at his handsome mane as he slept warmly in her embrace, nights of lonely thoughts that divided all that was hopeful from all that was true—she planned what to use those breaths for, and she planned it well.

“I beseech you...” She murmured into the broadening void as she turned over to slumber. “....Goddess Gultophine...”

From the hilltop where they forced and yanked Blue Farrier townward, the building was a mere dot against the shadowed edge of the Everfree Forest. The blue Pegasus snapped his neck back to stare at it—but was forcibly yanked southward by the officers escorting him. In a final fit of desperation, he angrily reared his hooves and tried to throw their grip off him. But their teeth held firm to the ropes attached to his bridle, and he was forced into a submissive squat on the ground, where he saw his moon shadow kiss the earth, before a deflated sigh blew a river of sand sadly away.

The police ponies murmured to one another and trotted forward to drag Blue the rest of the way to downtown Ponyville, when all of the sudden--

B O O O O O O M

The night's sky lit up. In half a blink, all five ponies and their prisoner were thrown to the Earth. The sound was deafening, and the vibrations that rumbled through the Earth made it impossible to breathe right. Nevertheless, Blue took the opportunity to jump onto his hooves and toss his bridle off with inequine strength. The soonest the bits flew free from his mouth, he shouted his mate's name---but couldn't hear anything save for a constant dull ringing in his twitching ears. With a numb gaze, he looked around him to see all of the officers sprawled on the floor—writhing in pain from the throttling jolt. Then, out of the starry sky, several shattered bits of lumber fell across the scene in a rain of chaotic proportions.

Naturally, Blue Farrier's eyes darted up—and he was startled to see a prismatic band of colors burning brightly across the night's sky. Every shade of the spectrum from red to green to violet burned across the cosmos in every direction—from Cloudsdale to Canterlot and beyond—covering the entirety of Equestria in a ceiling of gorgeous catastrophe.

There was no spare second for Blue to cherish the absurd beauty of the moment. For the first thing that came to his mind was--

“Iris.” His voice broke through the dull ringing in his ears. He spun about and looked downhill, towards the epicenter of the cataclysm. What was once the stables building was now an inexplicably collapsed pile of lumber. “Iris!” He immediately bolted into a full gallop. His body shook and his spine stretched, so that the bindings that the officers hastily put on his wings fell loose. In a single bound, he took to the air, and glided the west of the way like a sapphire lighting bolt, until he practically crashed through the scant remains of the stables doorway.

“Iris!” Blue shouted the first moment he was inside the dilapidated interior. A steady stream of dust and hay fell from the shattered ceiling like snow in slow motion. “Iris—Oh, by Celestia's mane—IRIS!” He shouted, kicking apart piles of lumber with his hooves as he frantically rummaged through the place. His breaths grew shorter, shorter, shorter—then stopped in a gasp as he saw...

...Dr. Canterstitch, collapsed besides a wooden crossbeam, moaning as he drifted in and out of a fresh concussion. And then—half a trot away—there lay a small figure, twitching, its body curled up within the perfect halo of starlight beaming in from the exploded ceiling. Without a second thought, Blue galloped and slid over to the foal, biting his teeth into the rubbery sack that still clung over its neck and snout. With expert motions, he uncovered the infant pony, and allowed it to breathe fully for the first time. And it was within the space of those last few seconds of observation that Blue's eyes widened even more.

The foal was a pegasus. But it was like no other—The moistened coat was a sky blue, brighter than Farrier's—but the feathery soft scrap of its mane and tail was a natural phenomenon: a rainbow coat, every shade of every color ever, in perfect celestial transition. The gentle thing twitched as its hide rose and fell with its first breaths. A rainbow pegasus. A girl. And very much alive.

Blue exhaled sharply—a happy, half-sob. “Oh Iris....She's beautiful. She's the most beautiful thing I've ever seen. Iris, do you see her?” Silence. “.....Iris?” For once, his eyes stopped fixating on the post-natal filly as the cold of the night sunk in. His gaze traveled up her umbilical cord, and onto a white mass that laid under the shadow of two crossbeams. “Iris....? Honey....?”

Blue got up and slowly trotted over towards the ivory form. He leaned over. His snout nudged it once, twice. He bowed closer, nuzzling its neck, contacting, registering.....nothing.

“Ohhhhhh Celestia, have mercy! No no no—please--not like this!” He knelt down, collapsing, beside the body as he rubbed his snout against its. “Oh Iris, I wanted the three of us....The three of us....Huhhh-hhhhh....”

As his body shuddered, his wailing sobs filling the void of the night, the sounds made their way over the twitching ears of the rainbow-streaked foal. In a shivering fit, her soft violet eyes opened up, and for some reason—a reason she didn't yet understand—they were brimming with tears.

I Remember Rainbow Dash

(Eight years later, on the other side of Equestria...)

North of the Stampeding Mountains, along the banks of the Azure Sea, there lied the forested Territory of Whinniepeg. In the center of the miniature kingdom, bordered by serf farms and outlying townships, was a four-story bricklaid castle built upon the watery shores to the north. The structure was by no means as lush and majestic as the Royal Architecture found at distant Canterlot—but the gray stony features of the keep sang silent songs of its grand age and history and of the several dynasties preserved within.

One night, as the cold blue stars swam their gentle way over the sloping horizon, a lone figure could be seen in the field outside the castle, just beyond the viciously dancing penumbra of the tall structure's flickering torchlight. Lying on the soft grass beside an abandoned stone hut with a thatched roof was a pale blue unicorn—a filly—barely past the age of self-enchantment.

This petite moonlighting pony paid no heed to the heavy shadows of the waxing night. Instead, she focused all of her attention to a violet-skinned book propped open in front of her. A tiny campfire bristled and sputtered to her side, casting a dim glow that barely illuminated the immeasureably old runes etched across the pages of her literature. And yet, in spite of the scant light, the silver haired unicorn had no trouble whatsoever reading the archaic words spread before her.

“Hmmmm.... .... ...'Ethelithiulim kelliwiczit mesum'mar fala sulthasalum Epon'a selecestriaria'....” She murmured. Her purple eyes blinked as she gazed skyward in audible thought. “'Integrate cosmic breath by the gift of Epona's skydance'.....” She rubbed her tiny chin with a hoof for a few seconds of contemplation, then glanced up cross-eyed at the looming image of her alicorn protrusion. A sudden gasp: “Of course! The 'wind' is the 'will', by the grace of Epona's 'skydance'--or her spirit!”

The young filly got up on all fours and locked her legs. With sizable effort, she tilted her head forward, aiming her horn at a pile of rocks located two yards from the twinkling campfire. A deep squealing noise rose like a reverse waterfall from the inside of her fluttering gut, and the very tip of her horn glowed with a bright silver energy.

“Nnnngh....M-Must....Focus.....” A deep shuddering breath, and she calmed herself in time to chant forth: “Hr'numma, Trixie, ethelithiulu Terrestria fala Epon'a selecestriaria, hr'nummulu!” Her legs buckled as her horn emanated a brighter glow at the very end of her incantation. Sweat ran down the edges of her temples and her porcelain mane flowed in an unnatural wind.

This proceeded for what seemed like an intolerable eon, until the young unicorn opened her eyes and gasped—her violet eyes dilating—to realize that the wobbling pile of stones was levitating magically before her, by the sway of her focused will.

“It's working....It's working!” She all-but-giggled as her eyes lit up, following the slow ascent of the jagged pieces of earth into the starry sky before her. “Oh blessed Epona—I had no idea it was so easy--!” A twinkle of light in the distance caught her attention, forcing her to glance towards the horizon. Suddenly she gasped wide, her face grimacing in horror.

Th-Th-Thud! The rocks fell into a messy pile, sending a flurry of dried up grass fluttering about the scene as the filly fell on her rump and balked at the Eastern skyline. Dawn was approaching, the distant clouds bubbling in an unmistakable blue glow.

“Oh N-No!!” She panted. She glanced aside at her satchel of things and noticed that the topside of her hourglass was empty since she had placed it down countless hours ago. “No no no no no! I've lost track of time!” With clattering teeth, she glanced at the horizon, at the castle, at the horizon, then at the castle again. “I-I gotta get back inside! Ohhhhh---!”

In a frenzy, she clapped the dusty tome shut and flung it—along with the hourglass—into her satchel. She aimed her unicorn at the campfire and chanted a few ancient words; the flames magically put themselves out. She then dug her snout into her satchel and yanked out a purple cloak embroidered with a dazzling ensemble of stars and comets. This too she aimed her horn at, only now the murmured incantation was far more melodic and focused—a sign of a magic spell that she had spent every day of her young life practicing in earnest. As her words dripped out, her horn vibrated with a gentle hum, and a deep darkness gently cascaded over the cloak, so that the shadow that the cloth cast was twice as darkly as everything else's under the advent of dawn.

With a final breath, the unicorn flung the now-enchanted cloak over her flank—covering her pale blue body—and grabbed her satchel in her teeth. But just as she made to gallop towards the castle, and away from the distant sunrise--

THUD!

“Ummmf!” The filly fell back from impacting a white coated chest. Her cloak fell off her shoulders and her satchel spilled out on the grass besides the abandoned hut. Shaking the dizziness out of her skull, she hopped to her hooves and started: “Now just who in Equestria would be so rude to stand in a lady's way--?” She froze in mid growl, her eyes twitching. An even huger gasp escaped her lungs. “P-P-Prince Blueblood! Y-Your Highness!” She immediately petered back and fell into a full-bodied bow. “I am so, soooo s-sorry, my liege!”

“.... ... ....” A young unicorn colt with a sparkling blonde mane stood above her, blue eyes observing the subservient stance with a haughty boredom. He was only a few winters older than her, but obviously far bigger in stature and in standing—both physically and figuratively. He took a look down at his fine white coat—slightly fluffed from the sudden impact of her scampering body into his. He sighed long and hard; and the sigh turned into a drolling mutter: “Hmmmph—Seems like you do a far more exceptional job at seeing what's in front of you when you're bowing on your knees rather than when you're gallivanting about on all hooves.”

“A thousand pardons, my Prince! I did not expect to m-meet you in the middle of the field at night--!” She paused at her own words, eyes blinking confusedly towards the grass. She tilted her head up and squinted at him. “Erm....Just wh-wh-why are you out here.....Erm....Y-Your Highness?” Her coat blushed a darker blue as she realized the audacity of her question.

Then, from her peripheral, startling her: “Is this the brat you were talking about, cousin?”

“Ugh....For the penultimate time, yes!” Prince Blueblood of Whinniepeg tossed his mane as two more colts—also members of Regal Unicornia—trotted up to flank him on either side. “Was it not enough that I regailed you on the truly inane nature of her moonlighting sorcery that you had to force me out here in the bitter cold of early morning to bring clarity to your doubting eyes?” He suddenly smirked down at the filly, eyebrows waggling pridefully: “Surely you have met my blood relatives from Neighbraska, Baron Hardhoof and the young Duke Wintercolt of Trottingham!” He then tapped his richly horseshoe'd hoof to his chin. “Oh wait a second—You haven't! Because you're just a naïve servant! Mmm-hah-hah-hahhh!”

The other two likewise chuckled as the three formed a formidable circle around the young unicorn. She glanced at them nervously and gulped, struggling to maintain her bowed stance of reverence. “H-How is it that may help you, m-my lieges?”

“Wow. Listen to her. She's like a trained parrot!” One of the royals smirked Blueblood's way. “Hey, girl—you're a daughter of the Royal Whinniepeg Light Casters, right?”

“Y-Y-Yes, sir...” She shivered and eyed their leering trots uneasily. “The R-Royal Light Casters have been in the service of the Bluebloods for several centuries, headlining various festivities and royal events like the Northern Galloping Gala--”

“I didn't ask you for a history lesson, peasant!” The one royal spat. “You do realize you're talking to a third-to-the-throne, do you not?”

“Hah!” The other one pointed with a hoof and giggled. “She doesn't even have her cutie mark yet! Someone call the Royal Guard! We've got a wild horse on the loose who should be stabled! Ha ha ha--”

She trotted backwards and crossed her hooves, gazing away sheepishly as her eyes started to water—But then the Prince spoke:

“Don't be so hard on her, dear cousins. After all, she is surely out here on a mission of great study and importance—Are you not, young one?” He stared down at her, frowning. “Surely there must be a reason why I shouldn't just report your breach of curfew! After all, it is only because of the safe keeping that my family has provided you pathetically fragile herd of inbreds over the centuries that you can count herself as safe! And to insult me by frolicking outside the castle dates under the shade of night! Bah! How detestable!”

“Yeah—Just why is it that you Whinniepeg showponies are never seen around in the daytime anyways?” One of the royals brushed up against her in a half shove, scoffing. “I was disappointed when nobody performed a dancing light show at my arriving luncheon yesterday!”

“What's your name, showpony?” The other royal asked the timidly wilting unicorn.

“Erm....mmm—T-Trixie, your h-highness....” She squeaked out.

“Trixie! Hah! Oh that's a laugh!” One royal guffawed. “The youngest in a family of lightdancing unicorns! They should have named her 'One-Trixie'! Do you get it? 'One-Trixie the Pony'!”

“Hahahahaha!”

“Hah hah hah—Well put, cousin...”

Her eyes deflated at that, palpitations rising up from deep within--

“Well well well, what do we have here?”

She spun around and gasped.

Prince Blueblood was practicing a levitation spell with his horn—and floating in front of him, in front of all of them, was the violet-skinned tome that she had been practicing from earlier. He narrowed his confused eyes and read off the cover of the book. “Breaths of Epona: A Record of Arcane and Tradition in Cosmic Alchemy.” He tossed the book offensively to the side, elliciting a gasp from the trembling Trixie. “Cosmic Alchemy?! Bah! On top of moonlighting, she's been performing outdated paganism—And on the land of my royal inheritance!”

“Guess someone knows she's just a 'One-Trixie'!”

“I say! Hahahahah!”

“Heheheheh!”

Trixie suddenly growled as a shot of boiling anger rocketed up from her heart and barked out of her mouth: “It's not 'paganism'! It's a school of magic lost through the ages! My family used to be a proud herd of the Eponaistic Lineage! And just because most magic academies these days scoff at ancient history doesn't.... mean... .... ...that.... ....” She suddenly shrunk back dociley.

All three colts were bearing down at her, frowning. After an intimidating bout of silence, Blueblood cleared his throat and tossed his blonde mane into the brightening horizon. “Such insolence. Tell me, dear cousins, what would be a fitting form of punishment for a mere charlatan who doesn't know when to close her offensive snout?”

“A dozen floggings!” One royal smirked devilishly. “That would equal a hundred on that pathetically soft blue coat of hers.”

“A day in the dungeon!” The other one snickered. “Maybe she'd learn some new magic down there, like how to frighten rats!”

Trixie trembled as she gazed in uncertainty at these young nobles deciding her 'fate'. Her frightened eyes fell from one colt, then to another, and then to the third—but in between hovered forlornly on the blossoming sunrise behind them. Finally, with a desperate gulp, she raised a hoof and subsequently raised her jittery voice: “Y-You may punish me as you s-see fit, my lords. But I implore you—Have mercy on your wrongfully petulant servant, and allow her to go indoors. Please—I beg of you.”

“Hmmm... .... ...” Blueblood scratched his chin. “Indoors.... ...?” He glanced at both of his cousins. He smirked. He motioned with his head behind Trixie's back. In a chuckling swoop, both royals galloped into her—inducing a shriek from her frightened self. In a tumbling flight, grass kicking up on either side of her, she found herself flung into the center of a dank hovel. Stumbling up to her hooves, she gasped to realize that she had just been flung into the hollow of the abandoned hut besides her extinquished campfire. “Indoors it is, my humble servant!” Blueblood's smirking form disappeared as the wooden door to the tiny building was bucked shut from outside with a dramatic SLAM!

“No! Please!! Wait--!” She galloped and sped full force into the door. With a pathetic thud, she stumbled back. Squinting—she could see through the cracks in the frame that a large stone had been rolled up and laid against the single entrance of the hut. “M-My lieges! Don't do this!”

“Ordering us around now? Hahah—She deserves this confinement!”

“Prince Blueblood, just how do you put up with such worthless servants?”

“Mmmm—The Light Caster family surely are a bore from time to time. But unlike most pets, they do talk enough to amuse me.”

“Most assuredly! Heheh—My stars, I am famished! When is breakfast?”

“Follow me, cousins. Our morning entertainment is over for now.”

“Have a good time, 'One-Trixie'! Hahaha!”

“Nnnnngh--” The young magician in question struggled to shove her shoulders up against the door. She pushed and strained and ultimately collapsed onto the hard rocky floor of the hay-strewn hut. After a deflated sigh, she glanced up...up....and practically shrieked, her eyes as wide as saucers.

The thatched roof of the hut had worn away with the ages. A huge gaping hole showed the last twinkling specks of light as they were washed away by the brightening blue of early dawn. In honesty, there was no definitive roof to be had, and the interior of the hut was starting to get less and less dim--

“Goddess, no!” Trixie panted. Panicking, she scratched and hammered away at the door with desperate hooves. “Let me out! Let me out, please!” She shrieked louder and louder. “You don't understand, my lieges! I...I....I-I will die!” She could barely make out the laughter of the three royal unicorns, fading away into the distance as they trotted apathetically away.

In desperation, she squatted low and peered her purple eyes through the thin crack underneath the hut's door. Scanning the grassy gnoll outside, she took notice of the boulder in the foreground, the scant remains of the campfire, the arcane tome, her satchel--

“Oh thank heavens!”

She saw her cloak. The young Trixie glanced up at her horn, then back down at the crack. She knelt down and took several deep breaths, concentrating, and finally murmuring forth a frightened but focused incantation: “Hr'numma Tr-Trixie ethelithiulu T-Terrestria f-fala Epon'a s-selecestriaria hr'nummulu!”

Her horn glowed. The door wobbled slightly. The grass between her and the cloak fluttered in opposite directions. But it worked. The darkened cloak of 'stars' was slowly but surely lifting up from the earth.

“Come on....” Trixie shuddered and sweated with the effort. “Please....oh please....”

The cloak shifted its flimsy weight under the novice magician's control, but slowly began snaking its way towards the hut. Its enchanted shadow grew in prominence as it ran a desperate floating race against the waxing wave of dawnlight.

“Come onnnnnn--” But then, Trixie suddenly gasped. “....!!!”

The cloak had caught on a branch. Trixie concentrated harder, her horn vibrating with the sheer effort. The cloak tugged and tugged, but wouldn't budge. Suddenly the grass around it became three times as green. The unassuming light from the sunrise made its way towards the crack beneath the hut's door and viciously FLASHED into the violet eyes of the young Whinniepeg Light Caster.

“Uhhhhngh!” Trixie stumbled back into the far wall of the hut. Seeing stars, she scaled the walls with her burning vision. The stars were all gone now in the hole of the barely existent 'ceiling'. Stifling a sob, she leapt and clawed and clamored at the walls of the hut. Dust and straw fell on her twitching face, mute against the palpitating breaths of the young filly. “No...oh no—Mmmm--” Trixie shrunk against the door of the wall, clinging to the scant shadows left to the place. “Nnnngh--” She tilted her snout up high. “Help! Please! Somepony! Anypony! Please help me!”

Silence.

The shadows melted away.

Sunlight poured against the opposite wall and swam its way down like molten lava before the snow blue unicorn. It then boiled its way across the stone floor of the hut, inching menacingly towards the young Trixie as she stood up on her shivering hooves with her back planted against the furthest corner of the place. She squeaked and whimpered and tried to press herself further away from the bleeding light, and still it came. As soon as the first edge of the sunbeam inched its way over her white tail, steam hissed into the air.

“Nnnngh!” Trixie yelped and pressed her entire body flat against the wall. She gasped as the steam wafted up to her nostrils, and then she gasped even louder as the steam tripled.

North of the Stampeding Mountains, along the banks of the Azure Sea, there lied the forested Territory of Whinniepeg. And in the center of this miniature kingdom—as the morning Sun rose innocently in the soft blue sky—a tortured scream flew from a lone building several yards from a four-story castle. The sky rang with the howl, frightening birds out of several trees so that they flew southward....

....and a few shrill seconds later, faintly boiling over the edges of the mountain tops, a gorgeous band of rainbow light from the south shimmered, soared, then dissipated, unseen.

(Ponyville, Today....)

“It all happened during the race at Flight Camp, where I stood alone against all odds to defend Fluttershy's honor. I'd never flown like that before. The freedom was unlike anything I'd ever felt. The speed, the adrenaline, the wind in my mane; I liked it...a lot! Turns out the only thing I liked more than flying fast, was winning! Most people thought that the sonic rainboom was just an old mare's tale. But that day, the day I discovered racing, I proved that the legends were true. I made the impossible happen!”

A blue wing unfoils ever so briefly to display a permanent image emblazoned across an agile mare's right flank. A thunderous cloud is launching a daring zig-zag of prismatically charged lightning, a jagged dance of all the primary colors: golden yellow sandwiched between ocean blue and fire red. In a solitary blink, the wing folds back, and with a flick of a rainbow tail, the sky-colored pegasus smirks down at three mesmerized fillies gathered at the entrance to the Sugarcube Corner.

“And that, little ones...” Rainbow Dash gives a devil-may-care smirk and plants her front hoof down to punctuate the end of her story. “....is how you earn a cutie mark.”

Barely a second has passed, and the three little ponies articulate their awe in predictable fashion. “Whoaaaaaaaaaah.” Apple Bloom and Sweetie Belle are grinning cheek to cheek. Scootaloo, the final piece of the Cutie Mark Crusader Trinity, is practically drooling.

Suddenly: “Wait a second!”

The three girls do a double take as Fluttershy suddenly trots into frame, gazing emphatically at Rainbow Dash's startled face.

“I heard that explosion,” she says. “And I saw the rainbow too! Rainbow Dash, if you hadn't scared the animals, I never would have learned I could communicate with them and gotten my cutie mark!

Before the confuzzled Pegasus can respond, a certain pink Earth Pony bounces ceilingward and loudly announces: “I heard that Boom! And right afterwards, there was this amazing rainbow that taught me to smile!”

“When Ah got mah cutie mark, Ah saw a rainbow that pointed meh home!” Apple Jack remarks. She rubs circles on her chin with a thoughtful hoof before the facts in her blonde head rotate her eyes excitedly towards Rainbow Dash, and with a grin she exclaims: “I bet it was your sonic rainboom!”

The Crusaders' bright eyes are bouncing back and forth across this developing exchange, just as Rarity steps up, beaming. “There was an explosion I could never explain when I got my cutie mark!” The elegant seamstress utters.

“This is uncanny!” A voice murmurs from the far side of Sugarcube Corner. Twilight Sparkle is burning a hole through the floor with her purple eyes as she unravels the truth out loud before everyone. “If that explosion didn't happened when it did, I would have blown my entrance exam!” She glances up across the room, teetering on the brink of joyfully exploding. “Rainbow Dash, I think you helped me earn my cutie mark too!”

There is an ice-splitting breath of silence, as the weight of this mesmerizing truth mathematically overcomes the endorphin-bubbling ecstasy of the moment. Then the quiet is all too prophetically shattered by Pinkie Pie who takes it upon herself to violently pounce her entire fiberglass colored weight on Rainbow Dash in a heroic lunge of joy.

“Whoahhh--!” Rainbow barely has a chance to gasp. (Thud[?]!)

Pinkie Pie grins religiously down at her friend. “We all owe our cutie marks to you!”

Fluttershy's gentle face leans its way into Rainbow Dash's violet gaze. “Do you realize what this means? All of us had a special connection before we even met!”

Rarity's complexion joins the trifold portrait. “We've been BFFs forever and we didn't even know it!”

The blue pegasus can only manage a sheepish grin as she's overwhelmed by this happy huddle. Then to add caramel-coated insult to injury, Applejack warmly marches over with Twilight in tow. “C'mere, y'all...”

What transpires now is the toastiest thing since Princess Celestia ushered in the first sunrise. All five fillies form a circular embrace, and in the epicenter is Rainbow Dash, an inexplicable victim of fate—as they all are—but neither she, nor they, can stammer forth a complaint. What comes out of them instead is a conjoined hum, a squeal of happiness—briefly serenaded by a random “I love you guys” coming out of the delightfully frank squeakiness of Pinkie Pie's girlish chirps.

The three Crusaders are drinking in the scene from afar, adding to the warmth. Rainbow Dash can barely hear them—something about zip-lining—and then everything drowns out as she discovers a deeper niche within the warm arms of her closest companions, her sudden soulmates, her elements of harmony. And in the darkest clamshell places of her heart, where elation was only ever before a disguise put on by flight or fight, the warmth finds its way, and it reminds her... ...reminds her of those words, words spoken in shadows of another shape, words given to her to repeat at the fall of every cold night ever, and now summoning the moisture to her eyelids once again...

“I beseech you, Goddess Gultophine.”

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