The Survival Games

by The Cowardly Christian

chapter 1

The survival games

I OWN AND REGRET NOTHING!

...III...

I THANK GOD FOR EVERYTHING!

...III...

And so it begins...

...Charlie & the Chocolate Factory - Intro song...

From the strange island...the drones did fly...

To the newspapers, the radio stations, all media outlets...

But more importantly...they flew tot he schools...

And left their message:

ATTENTION WORLD!

I Dr. Baltazar Czernenkohave have created a luxury resort for the whole world to enjoy!

Using only the latest state-of-the-art technology my resort has everything you could ever need!

Spa, Gym, pool, theater, Buffet, Beach, rides, games, it has it all!

A truly automatic world of the future!

All waiting for you!

But don't take my word for it!

As a special treat, the first people I invite will be multiple random schools from all over the world!

Soon world, you will hear their testimonies and be amazed!

...

This stunned the world! Dr. Baltazar Czernenko was one of the most wealthiest philanthropist inventors in the world! He built everything from 'Haum 2.0' automatic houses, to the drones that deliver packages globally within mere HOURS, to the life score algorithm that allows said drones to assist the mortally injured in even the worst warzone and the quantum satellite backbone that rendered the undersea fiber optic cables obsolete.

He was also an equally notorious recluse, going as far as to build an artificial island in the middle of nowhere just to stay away from the rest of the world...

So for him to invite ANYONE there was truly something worth talking about!

The fact he was allowing children to come enjoy it for free only showed more of his altruistic nature as far as the world was concerned...

It was quite the wonderful spectacle that everyone couldn't help but be excited about...

Well...

Almost everyone...

...

"Some reclusive billionaire out of nowhere decides to bring all these children to his private island and NO ONE finds that suspicious? What about-

"SHUT UP!" Shouts Gaz Membrain as she punches her brother Dib in his larger then normal head, "Several weeks of relaxing with NO school and I will not have you ruin them with your stupid conspiracy talk!"

SPLASH!

"Yeah, so piss off stink brain!" Laughs a boy with a horrid skin condition named Zim(1) as he threw a 'water' balloon at Dib, getting a laugh from Dib's equally cruel schoolmates.

Dib sighed, 'Suspicious or not...this is going to be a LOOOOONG trip...' He grumbles to himself as he goes to wash off the 'water' before it attracts flies...

CRASH!

Dib was nearly knocked over by two irritated twins storming past.

I CAN'T BELIEVE YOUR STILL UPSET OVER THAT!

AND I CAN'T BELIEVE YOUR TAKING THAT BLONDE BRATS WORD OVER YOUR OWN BROTHER!

...

"Okay, okay! Kids attention, everyone!" Shouts Frankie Foster. In addition to schools, several orphanages had been selected for this trip as well. Including the orphanage run by her Grandma. It could be a fun, rewarding career-

BANG!

-and then there were days like this...

"Sabo put that down!

"Ace, I told you that lighter is not a toy!"

"LUFFY SPIT THAT OUT, YOU'VE NO IDEA WHERE THAT'S BEEN!"

CRASH!

Thankfully a nice fellow red-head named Wendy who was also a passenger had volunteered to help her out...and had just hogtied the 'Grey Terminal trio' down...

Quickly thanking her, Frankie then goes on to make sure the other orphans are doing well-

"GOKU SPIT THAT OUT, IT'S STILL MOVING FOR CRYING OUT LOUD!"

Frankie smiles as her other 'little' helper was also trying to help her...

CHOMP!

'Trying' being the operative word...

"SIX, SPIT OUT MAC!"

After forcing the infamous 'girl with a Maw' to spit out her young orphan friend, Mac thanked her...causing a little note to fall from his jacket.

Frankie had just enough time to read 'Frankie my Sweet', before a blushing Mac quickly grabbed it back and ran for it.

Frankie just smirked and shook his head.

"Oh, you dealing with a 'young cassanova' too?" Asked Wendy suddenly, having seen what happened.

Frankie looked at the teen surprised, "TOO? You mean you got a similar situation going on?" Wendy looked like she was about to respond-

ALL I WANTED WAS A CUTE LITTLE PIGGY! WAS THAT SO WRONG?

WHEN IT SENDS WENDY TO THE HOSPITAL? YES!

Wendy just sighed without looking behind as Frankie just watches startled as two certain siblings stormed past as they continued to bicker...

"Yes...although I have a feeling my situation is much more complicated..." She admitted in somber resignation...

...

Anne, Sasha and Marcy- AKA 'The Calamity Trio' -were busy loading their 'instruments' into a hidden compartment made into the ship.

"This better work twerp." Said Sasha to a much younger boy named Eddy(2), Sasha was ALREADY in a bad mood learning her online 'contact' was just a pre-teen kid...she was in no mood for anymore screwups!

Eddy just gave her an affectionate pat on the face, "Eh, just stand there and look pretty-

CRACK!

"WHAT DID YOU JUST SAY?" Said Sasha as she began to bend him on her ankle.

"JOKING! I WAS JOKING! I'M SORRY!" Wined Eddy!

Anne and Marcy winched at this...but said nothing as they continued to move the 'stuff' inside...they weren't comfortable with this...but it was what SASHA wanted...and you ALWAYS did what a friend wanted even when it made you miserable...right?

AND ANOTHER THING! WHAT EXACTLY DID YOU SACRIFICE!? I SHAVED MY HEAD AND ENDURED WEEKS OF HUMILIATION FOR YOU! YOU GAVE ME THAT VALENTINE WHILE WE WERE ALONE! WHAT, DIDN'T WANT TO BE SEEN COMFORTING YOUR LOSER BROTHER AND RUIN YOUR POPULARITY?!

WELL EXCUSE ME FOR TAKING EXTRA TIME MAKING YOU THE PERFECT VALENTINE, YOU UNGRATEFUL JERK!

They all briefly looked up from what they're doing to watch the ongoing Pine twins drama...

...

"Ah, golly that's a beaut!" Said a teenager named Sheldon. A young boy named Dexter smiled as he held up his latest prototype proudly. His new friends Jimmy Neutron, Jeremie Belpois, Phineas Fletcher and his half-brother Ferb were equally impressed.

"OOPS!" Shouts a sing song voice as Dexter gets knocked over by his older sister DeeDee causing said device to fall and smash, she and various other people then laugh at them.

"Better luck next time losers!" Shouts a guy from Sheldon's class named Prima Dona!

"Hey! Nobody messes with my brothers but me!" Shouts Phineas's older Sister Candace as she inexplicably tackles DeeDee and they begin to fight!

"CHICK FIGHT!" Shouts everyone excitedly...well, except Phineas as he pleaded for Candace to let it go...or failing that at least some form of sanity...

While everyone's distracted, a pretty girl named Jenny Wakeman(3) walks up and discretely fixes the device and gives it back to the boys. "Sorry about that." She whispers sincerely then quickly walks away before anyone sees what she did.

"What's with that girl? She seems quite clever...why is she hiding it?" Asked Dexter confused.

Sheldon sighed, "Jenny's a great gal...but she's too absorbed in getting everyone to like her...which stinks because frankly most of them ain't worth her time...bunch of ingrates." He said that last part bitterly.

"Eh, girls. Who needs them? Nothing but trouble if you ask me." Said Jimmy dismissively, oblivious to the annoyed look a certain blonde girl his age was giving him...

LOOK, I BELIEVE THAT YOU BELIEVE YOU SAW SOMETHING!

OH, THAT'S JUST A FANCY WAY OF SAYING 'I BELIEVE YOUR HALLUCINATING!'

"Case in point."(4) Said Jimmy as he pointed at the retreating rainbow sweater covered Pine's girl as she argues with her twin brother.

...

Mike Mazinsky ran out of the room sobbing, covered in tar and feathers...

A bunch of girls nearby laughed at the pain and suffering they caused, this pompous group of snobs consisted of: Chloé Bourgeois, Lila Rossi, The Crust Cousins(Brit and Tiff), Sissie Delmas, Princess Morebucks, Amity Blight, Boscha, Brittney Wong, Carol Pingrey, Princess Justine, Bambi and Pacifica Northwest.

A casual observer would see only a bunch of rich, snobby girls laughing at someone's misfortune...

But look underneath the underneath and you'll see the makings of an intense socio-political game that would put any world war to shame! All these so called 'friends' were simultaneously watching the world around them, each other and their own actions. Every move calculated to assert their dominance over the others while undermining everyone else. In a single minute dozens of alliances will rise, falls, be betrayed or be restored in but a single word. A single slip, a misspoken word, a glance given at the wrong time...could topple a queen bee all the way down to pariah...

"Oh, these hunks are so hot!" Said Sissie with a giggle as she perused the 'less savory side of the internet on her phone along with the others...

Or maybe I'm overthinking this and they really are just a bunch of shallow snobs...

"Nevermind that now! You were telling us about how you humiliated that Pine Boy?" Brit asked Pacifica with interest.

"Oh, I'm very proud of that! first I got a picture of him naked- and let me tell you something, he is more then proof-positive of 'LITTLE dogs bark the loudest'." Waiting for them stop laughing, she continues. "After distributing them to EVERYONE, he of course tried to blame me for it...but of course no one believed him. Not even his own sister!"

"His own sister? Girl you yanking our chain! How'd you pull that off?" Tiff asked skeptical yet intrigued.

Pacifica gave a dismissive hand wave, "Oh, I have the little idiot believing I'm some misunderstood rich girl, who's forced to be mean due to their parents and social pressure and can be redeemed if only someone could reach out to me!" She said that last bit in a mock dramatic fashion that causes just about everyone to laugh.

"Yeah, that's a good con." Said Chloé as she reminisced how she'd been pulling it on her dear sweet Adrien for years now...

"Now that don't get me wrong, I love a good 'shaming' as much as the next girl...and yet..." Mused Lila out loud... "I can't help but notice you seem to be expending a LOT of energy on this Dipper boy...not to mention the question of WHY you doing in his shower to get that picture in the first place? You, uh...you got a thing for the 'little' one's?" She mocked.

Not missing a beat, Pacifica gave a dismissive snort. "Hardly, I wasn't in his shower. He was swimming in the creek naked for whatever reason. And I'm 'expending energy' because he's the only person in my town who refuses to obey me, do I really need to explain why that kind of behavior needs to be 'discouraged'?

"Nope", "Fair enough", "She got us there", "If anything your being too soft, I'd have just exiled him from my country..."

SO WHAT ARE YOU SAYING?! JUST BECAUSE PACIFICA IS A PRETTY GIRL AND MIGHT BE BEING ABUSED, THAT MAKES IT OKAY FOR HER TO TREAT EVERYONE LIKE CRAP?!

HA! SO YOU DO ADMIT SHE'S PRETTY!

THAT WAS YOUR TAKE-AWAY FROM WHAT I JUST SAID!?

The girls were stunned as the twins continued their argument as they marched past their section.

Tiff whistled impressed as they left, "Dang girl you got them chumps dancing to your strings like a pro!"

But Pacifica wasn't really listening... 'He thinks I'm pretty?' She thinks with a slight blush...

HUH...well, maybe I wasn't ENTIRELY wrong either...

...

YOU LAUGHED AT ME WHEN I GOT BIT BY A SNAKE!

YOUR VOICE WAS FUNNY! HOW COULD I NOT LAUGH?!

I SPENT THE WEEK IN ER!

The Pine twins pushed by a boy with white hair burning a squirrel costume in effigy, a young green haired girl with a beret, red boots and her pet white 'fox' as they pushed an odd statue around and blue haired boy and his orange haired brother trying to talk to a albino goth girl with a girl with fake antlers...

"It wasn't just that! You also laughed at me getting my leg gnawed by a wolf and a woodpecker pecking off my tongue. Dang it Mable, it's like you don't care about my life OR anything that's important to me! Worse, you always get upset whenever I do likewise to you! It's always 'What about me?' with you and- ARE YOU EVEN LISTENING TO ME!?"

"Wha- Sorry, no, a butterfly was flying by..." Said an oblivious Mable. She then looks at her watch, "Okay...look dipper. The buffet is supposed to start soon and I want first dibs on those flapjacks! ...so can't we just skip the usual argument and go right to us learning a 'lesson', realizing we love each other no matter what, have an 'awkward sibling hug', and just go back to having fun together!?" Offers Mable in disinterest.

Years later, Dipper would never be able to remember what made him decide to do what he did next...Mable's attitude? His increased anger with this whole argument? The argument itself? The realization that Mable was right...and he did not like it one bit? A combo of the lot?

Well, Whatever it was...

"...No..."

There was no turning back...

Mable graoned, "Oh, come on Dipper! wouldn't you rather eat then argue?

"No, you misunderstand." Said Dipper coldly.

"Not 'no', to what you said...I meant NO to everything."

Mable looked him confused, "what'cho talking about Dip-dop?" she said as playful as possible.

Dipper just shook his head, "I mean I'm done with this argument...but I'm also done with YOU." He said firmly.

Mable gave a small chuckle, "What do you mean 'done with me'? I'm you sister silly! You can't be done with me, not before the fun stick is done with you! BOP!" Shouts Mable as she tries to playfully poke him with said stick.

CRACK!

Only for Dipper to immediately snatch it and snap it over his knee!

"Hey! Dipper that was mine!"

"Yet when you break MY things, suddenly it's no problem? Is that it?" Asked Dipper sarcastically.

"Wha- come one, you forgave me for that...

"No! Actually, I didn't! For some reason I completely forgot about that and became obsessed with wanting to have a solo slumber party with you!" Dipper frowns, "Why did I do that? was I concussed or something?" He shakes his head, "Nevermind, that's only ONE of our problems anyway...problems you clearly have no intention of ever fixing...so what's the point? You talk about 'learning a lesson'...but you never do! And I'm tired of hoping for otherwise..."

Dipper then turns around...and begins to walk away...

Mable...Mable was starting to become concerned..."Dipper...come on...get real! Were going to see each other back at the-

"I'm going to ask one of the servants to move my stuff out of your room...if they won't I'll move it out myself, heck I'll sleep in the laundry room if I have to! ...I'm also going to be moving out when we get back home. I'll just sleep on the lawn, at least the wolves are honest about wanting to make me miserable..." Interrupts Dipper, without stopping or looking back.

"C-come on Dipper, stop joking around! This isn't funny!" Said Mable...tears coming to her eyes...

"No...no it's not...goodbye Mable..."

Trying very hard to ignore the sobs behind him...a Resolute Dipper wiped away his own tears...and kept walking...away from his past...and toward his future...

...III...

TO BE CONTINUED?

(1): For awhile Dib thought Zim was an alien...but no, turns out Zim was just a normal, spiteful, stupid, homicidally insane boy who just deliberately gave himself a horrible skin condition- and severely shortened his lifespan -by injecting himself with horrid chemicals all to prank Dib and make him look like an insane idiot in front of everyone trying to 'prove' Zim an alien...all in the name of revenge for Dib accidentally hitting him with a muffin...

(2): Sasha threatened me unless I made this perfectly clear: Eddy SAID he was eighteen in the online chatroom!

(3): Sorry guys, but yes. Jenny is a human in this...well...for now at least...

(4): And even Cindy couldn't argue with THAT...not that that stopped her from TRYING of course...

AN: Want me to continue this? I'm willing to take Bribes! Go to my P,a,t,r,e,o,n account!

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Author's Note:

TO BE CONTINUED?

(1): For awhile Dib thought Zim was an alien...but no, turns out Zim was just a normal, spiteful, stupid, homicidally insane boy who just deliberately gave himself a horrible skin condition- and severely shortened his lifespan -by injecting himself with horrid chemicals all to prank Dib and make him look like an insane idiot in front of everyone trying to 'prove' Zim an alien...all in the name of revenge for Dib accidentally hitting him with a muffin...

(2): Sasha threatened me unless I made this perfectly clear: Eddy SAID he was eighteen in the online chatroom!

(3): Sorry guys, but yes. Jenny is a human in this...well...for now at least...

(4): And even Cindy couldn't argue with THAT...not that that stopped her from TRYING of course...

AN: Want me to continue this? I'm willing to take Bribes! Go to my P,a,t,r,e,o,n account!

Love me, flame me, review me