As Time Goes By

by Moproblems Moharmoney

Oh you must remember this...

As titles went, 'Princess of Friendship' seemed rather mundane to the average eye. It lacked the grandiose, life-giving nature of the sun, was missing the mystique of the moon, and the 'Princess of Love'? Well yes, it was a bit sappy. Until one thought a few moments on all the...implications it involved. Long uncomfortable silences often followed.

Friendship, however?

The prevailing thought amongst the common folk was 'anyone could make a friend, so why did they need a Princess for it?' Especially one funded by their taxes.

While Twilight Sparkle could happily write several different essays in response to such critique, many novel-length, on the complexities of friendship and why her role was justified... tonight was different.

"Could you pass the grilled carrots please, it seems after my journey I've worked up quite the appetite."

Yes, tonight Twilight rather agreed with the drunken hoi-paoli ranting into their grimy beer nuts.

"It'd be my pleasure, a mare with such ample... talents as yourself needs all the nourishment she can get."

Who needed another Princess? Equestria already had three! Technically they had a queen as well, even if she was of dubious moral fibre and less-than-stable sanity.

"Oh-ho, you've become quite the tease, haven't you? I like that."

No, what Equestria needed, without a shadow of a doubt in Twilight's mind, was more librarians. Yes, librarians. Underappreciated and underpaid, but of great importance to the moral and educational fibre of their great nation.

"You'll find I've become a great many things since we last met."

It also meant she wouldn't have to deal with whatever-the-tartarus this... this... 'thing' had become.

---

It had started, as all complexities in life are wont to do, with politics. Prince Blueblood had sought her out for a favour, a trifle really. Just a little 'nudge' from royalty to get the rusted wheels of bureaucracy moving once more.

He'd tried both aunts already, after speaking at length they'd both 'failed to see sense'. Which already put him on the back hoof with her, something Blueblood learnt with rapid speed. Unfortunately, for all his (many, many) faults, he was a surprisingly shrewd political operator. Worst of all, the stuffed popinjay was right. With elegantly presented horn writing on the thickest sheath of papers she'd ever seen the Prince handle, he highlighted again and again where the Diarchy (despite modernising marvellously for other areas of state) was rather lacking in the complexities of taxation.

So it had come to be, that she, Princess Twilight Sparkle, and he, Prince Blueblood, were debating over the minutia of grain taxes in an empty castle. Starlight had absconded with her 'good friend' Trixie for an impromptu magic tour, while Spike was left to attend the Manehatten Comic Con all on his lonesome. As much as she wished to be with him, the Prince did technically have a point in his legislative questioning, so her sort-of-little-brother would have to make do.

The debate frustratingly went back and forth deep into the evening, each point riposted into its respective counterpoint. Her optimism was matched evenly by the Blueblood's deep cynicism, an impasse that was only interrupted by an unexpected racket in the castle.

Placing his quill down with overt care in deterrence to a freshly hoof-washed suit, Blueblood rose hesitantly from a resplendent (if purchase lacking) crystal table. From here the two had been hashing those more intense elements of income-to-citizen-to-dont-rob-me-m'lord equations, but right now something else far more interesting was ahoof.

"What in the deuces was that?" the Prince said, eying his host quizzically. Ever since the Gala affair he was...careful shall we say, when it came to interactions with the Bearers. Preferably from a city away.

"I'm not sure," Twilight answered, voice still as her horn lit itself in readiness. She wasn't a cast-first kind of mare (that sobriquet firmly landed on her pupils' pupil), but preparing for the unknown was a key facet of any good magical academic. The bad ones tended to receive their refuted dissertations posthumously.

As Twilight carefully stepped away from the table, eyes focused on the room's only entrance, power swelled. Hers was a raging inferno, the former unicorn's old maximum output casually tripled, readied, and aimed at the oak double doors. Yet next to her was a candle, desperately burning to stand out amidst the noise.

She craned her neck to the left.

"Uh, what are you doing?"

"Preparing to...hrmph... defend myself, what does it look like?” Blueblood hissed, beads of sweat already forming on his brow as a golden, glowing, broadsword flickered in and out of existence, held aloft in an aquamarine glow.

"Well it looks like you're trying to cast Bonettis Blistering Blade, but your mana output can't reach the stability point." She rolled her eyes, what was it with stallions and overcompensation? "Drop the field by sixty percent and shift the modulation, that should do it."

She was a fully grown mare. One who felt strongly regarding the effects of bullying those less fortunate, especially when it came to tribal deficiencies. So it should have been easy to hold back the guffaw when her houseguest's broadsword reformed into a pocket knife. Emphasis on the words 'should have'.

"I've been taking lessons." he snapped defensively, pulling back into a battle-ready stance as the room's adjoining hallways began to fill with noise.

"Sure," the alicorn said dryly, noting his posture was that adopted by beginner duelists mere moments before they were run through by those with actual killer intent.

Day Court had been an unconventional education.

"I have!"

The noise increased, now sounding like the familiar clip-clop of hooves on her castle's ostentatious floor. What kind of maniac would break into her home? Especially after they wheeled the last poor fool in front of the press. Starlight had apologised at the time, but in Twilight's opinion it wasn't 'evil' per-se to act in self-defence. Even if Rainbow Dash had declared it 'crazy overkill'.

"Stand behind me!" she barked, lowering her head and (with a deep breath) activated the third sight.

It was a skill intrinsic to every unicorn, yet required exercise to gain even the barest of benefits. Theories as to its origins varied wildly, but the one which most agreed upon involved their ancient horned ancestors losing one too many of their tribe to canny foes and dead drop cliffs in the pre-spell casting era. The actual biological mechanics of it were complex, but it effectively expanded the users' field of vision drastically, taking an Equestrian ponies already prodigiously large eyes and pushing them to limits only those with magic running in their veins could achieve. Combat veterans were reported to gain a one-hundred-and-eighty-degree view at all times.

Twilight had beaten that at seven years old.

With a three-hundred-and-sixty-degree view of the room, Bluebloods... assistance, and enough magic in her horn to knock a minotaur into next week Twilight was confident she could deal with whatever came through that door.

She'd have to, since if her calculations were correct the intruder would arrive in three...two...one...

"Sorry for dropping in unannounced Twi but I-!"

She was ready for anything.

Except for Sunset Shimmer.

---

With eyes readjusted, magic missiles dispersed and arcane butter knives dismissed, Twilight felt it appropriate to live up to her title. Part of which included a pleasant introduction between old friends and new (?), both of whom seemed rattled from their unconventional meeting, in the hopes of spreading the burning joy that was the fires of friendship. In a more metaphorical sense of course, since 'fires of friendship' had taken on a rather different meaning amongst the youth, one that required Nurse Redheart and a significant amount of tetracyclines.

A quick hug was followed with a wing on the shaken, part-time unicorns withers, the alicorn gently directing a stunned Sunset towards her current guest.

"I know this is a bit unusual, and I'll do my best to explain, but I'd like to introduce my good friend-"

"-Sunset Shimmer, as I live and breathe!" the snow-white unicorn whispered, utterly awestruck.

The unicorn in question stumbled at the voice, squinting at the large stallion in a way that put Twilight on edge. She'd prefer to avoid another fight in her castle. The sign had gotten up to five days (a new record!) and she'd like to keep it that way.

"...Blueblood?" said Sunset, her voice unusually soft.

Four plus four ground out eight with alarming slowness for Twilight as realisation dawned.

"You two...know each other?"

Despite her friend's jeers, she considered herself fairly unflappable. Oh they would disagree, citing several 'freak outs' from the past, but that was the old Twilight. She'd grown as a pony, evolved. Wisdom and logic prevailed in her mind as a driving force.

So it was rather frustrating when Sunset's next words sent her into something the mirror doppelganger of Pinkie called "a bluescreen moment".

"Know each other? Twi, I was his marefriend for three years!"

Blueblood melted at those words, a dopey smile overtaking his usually sharp features as he approached the two mares.

"And what a glorious three years they were." He sighed, placing a foreleg around his ex while conveniently fluffing away the lavender wing resting there. "Yet I can't say your sudden disappearance all those years ago didn't hurt, Shim Sham-"

Twilight stepped out of the currently burning morass that was her mind for a brief second, eyes boggling at the mare she'd replaced at Celestia's side.

"Shim Sham!?"

"-I assumed it was something to do with my Royal personage." continued Blueblood, placing a hoof to his head dramatically, "Perhaps I'd been too headstrong in my proposal of marriage?"

The fire was abandoned now. More interesting things had popped up.

"Marriage!?"

Despite having two prime sources of evidence in front of her, something about this didn't seem real. It almost felt like an elaborate prank cooked up by Discord. Especially when Sunset began to stroke the conceited unicorn's face with a degree of tenderness she'd never witnessed before.

"Oh Blueblood, baby, honey. It wasn't you, it could never be you." Sunset closed her watery eyes, a haggard sigh escaping from her usually confident demeanour. " I just...had some disagreements with Princess Celestia and made one of the worst decisions in my life."

"Leaving me?"

Sunset cuffed the stallion softly, a cheeky smile on her face.

"Close, but no." She chuckled weakly now, no joy present. "I-I became wrapped up in my hubris, ugly inside. A monster. A monster that vented itself on another world."

A pair of slowly growing (she'd been measuring regularly) wings puffed out to gain the duo's attention. Twilight felt simultaneously terrible and relieved at interjecting in this outlandish scenario. Terrible because this was a genuine moment of reflection and emotion from a friend, while relieved because this was... well this was weird. Like walking in on your parent's mid-love-making weird.

Plus the whole 'top secret interdimensional mirror' thing. Couldn't let the populace learn of the multiverse just yet. Maybe in another hundred years.

"Who's hungry!? I know I am, I could eat a hor- a large pile of hay!"

Despite her castle's walls being a dull, cloudy crystal, she could swear the stares aimed in her direction had been reflected to a hundred-strong glare of destructive intensity.

With slow reluctance the ex-lovers separated, a thing of great hardship if Sunset's expression was to be believed. Blueblood in particular found it taxing, trailing a hoof gently across her back, an uncontested sign of familiarity.

"We have been at this paperwork for a few hours I suppose," he groused, stretching his neck out and regaining a fraction of the old Prince's contemptuous air, comforting Twilight in the process.

Said comfort was discarded immediately, as Sunset, her close friend, a pony/person/creature she valued highly and technically her first pupil, stared at the stallions shifting muscles with an undeniable hunger she'd never seen before.

This was going to be a long night.

---

The food was... sufficient.

It was embarrassing to confess her weakness in the culinary arts, but Blueblood had astonishingly stepped into the breach. While he didn't quite understand the merit of letting her chef (amongst several other titles) have time off, he was quite familiar with cooking for one's self. 'Good staff are hard to find' were his words.

She suspected an addendum was missing, specifically 'Good staff who put up with me are hard to find'.

It was an ungenerous thought, especially for a pony who had just cooked a three-course meal for them. Yet even amid a mouthful of creamy mashed potatoes, Twilight felt a definite sense of unease. Blueblood hadn't complained the entire time, not even once. Even with a few meagre stains on his custom kirin silk suit!

Then there was Sunset.

Twilight wasn't naive, she knew despite her connection with Sunset that the mare was still something of a mystery to her. Their friendship had been fast and fire-forged, but it had mostly consisted of journal messages and the occasional holiday romp in the mirror world. Not ideal to truly learn someone inside and out.

This Sunset was alien to her. She was...flirty. No, that word barely scraped the surface. Sunset was frisky. If not for the dining table being ridiculously large she'd expect to see the mare playing hoofsy under the table.

"-nd you say this 'mirror world' is full of shaven ape versions of ourselves? I don't know whether to be intrigued or horrified."

Ah, yes. That. Despite her best efforts Sunset had spilt the beans. Well, more upended the whole can purposely and with express intent. Technically Blueblood had clearance. Technically. While the secrecy was designed to stop a public panic, personally Twilight was more concerned he'd end up murdered after a 'jolly galavant' through the magical portal, humans having less tolerance for his asceberic ways and irritating eccentricities. She'd never met a stallion so obsessed with being clean in all her life.

"It's a bit weird, I won't lie. When you get used to it though the differences are amazing. Hands are just... wow." Sunset sighed, reaching out across the table with a hoof, flexing her frog in an imitation of the missed digits. "You can do so much! Plus all the cosmetics, each finger has a mini hoof to paint."

"Did you say 'humans' had ten of these 'fingers' ?" A swift nod from both mares sent Blueblood into a low hum, his icy blue eyes regarding the expertly hooficured keratin currently holding a forkful of steamed cabbage. "Yessss, that does sound rather...interesting. Yes, interesting."

A momentary dip in the conversation led Twilight to silently praise Celestia. She'd barely been adding to the ongoing back and forth between dinner guests, while the uncomfortable notion of being a third wheel in her own home was nagging away at the alicorn's sense of self. The orderly sound of cutlery scraping against ceramic brought a little peace to her soul.

"I think I'd like to see what this 'human world' is like Shim Sham, it seems a thrilling lark."

That peace was shattered. Much like Twilight's plate, her knife impressively breaching both dinnerware and the crystalline table underneath. Scowling (for its durability was the only thing she truly liked in the overabundant material that made up her home) she turned towards her royal equal.

"No." "Sure."

The two mares eyed each other, Sunset looking eerily familiar to how Twilight remembered her upon their initial introduction at Canterlot High School.

"I don't see the problem," Sunset said, a hard edge in her voice and a carrot-covered fork brandished in Twilight's direction. "If Blueblood wants to visit I can keep an on him."

"I am a big colt, I can look-"

"Shush!" Twilight snapped at the unicorn, giving up her futile efforts at removing the dinner knife, "The mares are talking."

One moment of brief contemplation with some deep breathing later and the Princess of Friendship was ready.

"Sunset," she began, using her best 'convincing' voice, "It's not that I'm worried for Blueblood's safety, he's a fully grown stallion after all-"

"Exactly what I was sa-"

"Shush!" hissed Sunset with a face still burnt into certain CHS student's nightmares.

"-It's just that I feel he may be rather bored." She continued, readying her secret weapon. "Yes, the initial biological shift is interesting, but it only lasts so long, and I can't see him enjoying being in a school full of teenagers now, can you?"

Silence reigned once more.

If Twilight was given to letting her smugness out (much like her pupil's pupil) then she'd be sporting a monstrously large smirk. To the winner go the spoils after al-

"How old are you Sunset?"

Blueblood had been quiet (as requested by both mares) yet during that time he'd been studying the unicorn intently, eyes narrowed and hoof on chin in deep contemplation. His words were chosen carefully, yet said with the casual charm of someone used to having little resistance to their demands.

"Uh..." pushing her food around awkwardly Sunset did some quick arithmetic, "I guess...nineteen? I went through the mirror a few weeks after my seventeenth birthday, and it's been two years in the human world." She chewed her bottom lip slightly, "At least in their years, interdimensional timezones are kind of a pain in the flank to translate. Why?"

It hadn't been particularly noisy within the dining room, but the sound of dropped cutlery was like a churchbell peal.

"Sunset...I...that is-"

Twilight's spluttering was cut off by a genteel cough from the Prince, now risen from his seat.

"I'm not particularly gifted in the metaphysical or theoretical elements of magic Shim Sham, you were there for my test results after all." He adjusted his tie, " However I believe what the Princess is trying to say is... well you've been gone from Equestria for twelve years."

The apparent tension was dismissed by a spoonful of mashed potatoes, calmly shovelled into a nonchalant Sunset's mouth.

"Oh, no big deal."

"I'm so sorry- wait what?" Twilight's head snapped up from a respectful bow, confusion etched on her face.

Pausing mid-spoonful, the unicorn stared at the duo, each suffering from a mixture of confusion and concern. "Huh?"

It wasn't her place, Twilight knew that. But something in Sunset's blase response irked her. She restrained herself this time, only using a tiny fraction of her strength to slam both hooves on the table for emphasis.

"Aren't you upset? Twelve years have passed since you left Equestria! Your family, your friends, they all could have grown old, forgotten you, even died!"

She'd expected tears, crying, even a burst of rage. Not laughter.

"Twilight c'mon, you met the old me. I had no friends." She placed her spoon down with exaggerated slowness, the handle protruding from her potatoes like a mockery of her friend's knife. "Everyone at the palace hated me, heck Celestia had to convince half of them not to quit I was such a stuck-up brat. Blueblood was the only one who even gave me the time of day, guess that's why we ended up together. As for family-" she turned away from the two, a faraway look in her eyes, "-I'm...I'm an orphan Twi, Celestia was the closest thing I had to a mother."

When she was young, Twilight liked to associate books with feelings. Some fillies did it with colours, but ' Volcanus - Burning Geology and You' seemed to fit 'anger' better than any shade of red in her mind. Right now she felt a lot like 'Necrosis: To rot with it all'.

Lips tight, she watched as Blueblood approached the downcast mare. The stallion had been a distant constant in her social circle, both at Day Court and during her outings in Canterlot. One thing that Twilight had long noticed, that set him apart from both nouveau riche and old money was the way he walked. It sounded ludicrous to say, but Blueblood had an unmistakable swagger when you paid close enough attention. It emanated privilege, a kind of unstoppable juggernaut of breeding that specified 'I am so important you shan't dare get in my way'. Yet now it was muted. Not absent as such, but held back with some difficulty, each step holding a slight wobble.

"I...erm... must say Shim Sham, it makes a fellow feel awfully nice that you don't notice he's nearly thirty."

Rainbow Dash's copy of '101 most embarrassing injuries' flashed to mind. Its glossy cover showcased all manner of Ponies in increasingly uncomfortable manners of distress.

Sunset, revitalised like a rose in the light, let out a choked giggle before unexpectedly pouncing on the taller unicorn. Confused and bewildered, Blueblood staggered backwards, his new passenger laughing all the while.

"No matter how old you get you're still the same old Blueblood," she beamed amid the whirling dervish that was the unbalanced couple. Their path, unstable to begin with, barely dodged a yelping Twilight and clattered into the wall.

The resultant tangle of equines led to a response in Twilight that Rarity and Rainbow had equally found amusing in the past, if for rather different reasons. It wasn't every day you saw a beet-red alicorn with wings covering its eyes after all.

"You know," Sunset whispered huskily atop the snowy unicorn, "I didn't think you were older, just...bigger." She traced a hoof over rock-hard muscles, muscles that certainly hadn't existed when they'd last been like this. "Scrawny little Blueblood, hitting the gym because he couldn't bare to be without his Shim Sham." Eyelids narrowed smokily, intent being transmitted loud and clear.

"W-Well, uh, one does like to, erm, stay in shape?" he squeaked, wriggling under the mare's lustful gaze.

The slamming of a door drew the couple's attention, their eyes slipping from each other to the rapidly retreating form of the Princess of Friendship, currently, a purple dot flitting down the hallway. Her apologies echoed back, but the duo had long stopped paying attention, other things very much on their mind.

---

The unnamed, disturbingly magical, material that made up Twilights home had a density of thirty grams per cubic centimetre, with the walls of each room ranging between three to four metres thick with the stuff.

"OH GOD! YES! YES! YES!"

It wasn't enough.

"MORE, MORE, MORE!"

She could still hear them.

It had begun within fifteen minutes of Twilight barricading herself in the palace's royal bed chambers. She wasn't a prude, far from it, but public affection like that...with those two of all ponies especially... it just squicked her out.

She didn't even begrudge them for staying the night. Dinner had run into the late hours, and Sunset was always welcome to stay over, having done so on two prior occasions. Twilight just objected to the two defying all known laws of science and magic combined, the shield of silence around her bed being rendered utterly useless somehow.

"FLASH DON'T HAVE SHIT ON YOU! RIGHT THERE! RIGHT THERE!"

They'd also been at it for over two hours now, and she desperately needed her beauty rest. Not to mention a yearning desire for less...intimate details on the human she still held a small yen for.

Even if he was 'lacking'.

Time wore on, as did Twilight's patience. Doing her best to muffle the noise underneath a veritable mountain of pillows, she noted the exact time when Sunlight's cries of ecstasy reached a fever pitch, as did the slightly quieter rhythmic thumping. While intent on using the information in a rather rudely worded friendship report to her student (focusing on the topic of 'considerate behaviour') an unearthly scream followed by silence caused her to pause.

Was it over?

Logically, the only way to truly tell was to check in on the two lovers. Weighing into consideration however was that she'd have to see in the room, her original plan being to place a horn through the smallest door crack and incinerate everything with Gygax's Giganto Conflagration.

After her guests had left of course. She'd have to wait because it was impossible to trust them not to make everything... sticky... again.

Feeling blessed sleep tug at her eyelids, the decision was thankfully no longer her concern.

---

It was with a hankering for the basics of life, bread, cereal and bottled orange juice, that drew the Princess of Friendship from her bed and to a homemade breakfast. Sugar Cube Corner could theoretically supply her needs, but after last night's humbling experience, she desperately needed a confidence boost when it came to cooking.

Twilight's brief shriek upon entering the breakfast nook however, matched her heart rate, in that both were high, sharp and quite unexpected.

The source for this was a thoroughly satisfied, yet oddly morose Blueblood. Clad in an ugly night-robe she suspected was a discarded present from Starlight, and seated on an austere wooden stool, the stallion was nursing a steaming mug of coffee while staring into nothingness, his usually pristine mane a thorough mess.

"I've been thinking," he said to no one in particular, taking a sip of the scalding liquid and ignoring the alicorns near heart attack.

"You've been thinking?"

"Yes. Thinking."

"...About what?" She eventually approached, long after the silence stretched from 'dramatic' to 'ludicrous'.

"My purpose, I suppose."

In Twilight's experience, nine am was too early in the day for confronting existential crises. Her response reflected that, even if a shred of her awakening mind was curious.

"Mhm?"

The Prince (of what, Twilight still wasn't quite sure) levelled a cool glare in her direction. Icy, but lacking in anger.

"I know you and my aunts think I'm a lay-about cad, good for nothing but magazine covers and gossip columns. It... it never really bothered me before, but this grain tax. It and Sunset's description of the 'human world'- " he paused, once more sipping from his mug, the aquamarine aura notably muted, "-they made me realise something. Equestria is doing well, but we could be doing better."

Like a stallion possessed, he rose from the stool, not quite ranting yet nowhere near the calm, reserved, pony Twilight was used to.

"How many citizens' lives could I enrich just by putting my nose to the grindstone? Auntie Celestia and Luna are wonderful, but they don't understand all those little loopholes or their long-standing effects my 'chums' from Trottingham University draft up in these bills."

The word 'chums' was spat with the kind of venomous tone she reserved for those few ignorant clods who burnt books. It was impressive and unsettling in equal measure to hear it from Blueblood's normally smooth voice.

"How much bread have I let fall from my fellow ponies' mouths!?" he continued, aura flaring with the question. "All the while the obese few siphon every available foodstuff! I was... I was so utterly blind before!"

His roar of frustration was crowned with the flung coffee cup's perfect arc, its ceramic body shattering as it impacted the wall. While rivulets of dark brown liquid dripping down her wall didn't inspire confidence in Blueblood's state of mind, it did tell Twilight she still needed to put in an order for more houseware.

A soft puff of breath was released as she approached the emotional stallion warily, Snooze Buttons Silent Sleep incantation ready in her mind. It was a fast caster thankfully, the sight of a horn glow was known to set off the more paranoid individual, so she held some faith that, if things became ugly, she could end it quickly with minimal fuss.

"I wouldn't say blind-"

"No Twilight don't you see!" he exclaimed, gripping her shoulders tightly and letting the mare know he'd definitely not bathed after his 'activities' last night. "I was a monster of ignorance, but I'll make it up, I'll make it up or my name's not Vladimir Blueblood The Third!"

Despite this heartfelt promise, only one thing came to Twilight's mind.

"Your name is Vladimir?"

Any possible explanation was rendered moot by a thunderous two-hoofed buck of the Breakfast Nooks door, its wood not so much breaking as shattering into a mass of splinters and high-quality varnish.

Standing in the open portal with as much dignity as two hours of sleep after some intense 'exercise' could provide, was Sunset Shimmer. If not for her personally witnessing the pony's purification, Twilight would assume the mare had double dipped on her 'steal the crown' scheme, the multiversal travellers face a rich picture of nigh demonic fury.

"Could you keep it down please, some of us are TRYING to sleep!" she snarled, not registering the former door as her hooves stepped over innumerable shards of wood. At the sight of Blueblood however Sunset's fury evaporated, a pretty smile replacing the previous mask of unholy terror. "Oh, hey babe."

Awestruck silence strangled any possibility of Twilight complaining over doors, ruined or otherwise. A quick side-eye found Blueblood in agreement. He, much like her, was utterly dumbfounded.

"What?" She whipped her head around following the pair's dead-eye stare, yet finding nothing. "What are you two looking at?

Twilight tried, honest and truly she did. Yet the words were firmly stuck in her throat, unable to escape. Eyes bulging, mouth like sandpaper, she pushed once more... only to be cut off by Blueblood.

"W-W-Wings!" he managed to stammer, furiously pointing at his lover's new appendages, the amber feathers radiant even in the reduced castle light.

It really wasn't a shock to Twilight anymore that her friend's transition to immortal godhood was treated with the usual solemnity she had for all things magical.

"Huh, neat?"

---

The Coronation Party for Equestria's Princess of Empathy was in full swing and didn't seem to be stopping anytime soon.

It would later be considered, by all accounts, a once-in-a-lifetime event. That was despite the eerily similar bash that had occurred one year prior. Alicorns, it seemed, were rather like the proverbial human buses. When you needed them they were nowhere to be found, yet as soon as your back turned a glut of them arrived.

While the great and the good of two worlds had been invited to the castle, pony doppelgangers swiftly learning that things superficially similar did have differences, Twilight found herself held back. Yes, Flash Sentry was here, and yes, he'd inquired politely for a dance (once a certain level of familiarity had been gained with his hooves) but she'd rebuffed him, a simple promise of 'later perhaps' sending the usually-human stallion scurrying to the buffet.

All too soon she found herself alone, stewing in the courtyard. At least she was, until a warm radiance wafted past her, one she associated with family, knowledge and above all else, happiness.

"Why are you out here all alone Twilight Sparkle?" Celestia intoned, her footfalls silent despite the rulers overwhelming size.

Silence. A familiar answer. Something she'd long ago learnt to navigate when it came to this certain pony. She had her ways.

"Are you not happy that Sunset has finished the first stage of the path you set her on?"

Twilight merely snorted, head held low.

"It's not that Princess, it's just...oh forget about it. Just a silly gripe is all."

"You can tell me anything Twilight, no matter how silly, but please, remember we are equals now. You don't have to call me Princess anymore." she giggled, a high-pitched elfin noise that was known to soothe even the most savage of tempers.

Ruffling her exquisite coronation gown, Twilight fired a look of irate confusion at her old teacher.

"Ok," she breathed deeply ,"You're telling me that while I had to horn craft a brand new form of cutie mark related magic to ascend, explicitly interweaving fate, time, and destiny into a complex whole. All Sunset had to do... was fuck Blueblood!?"

Mentally stumbling at her former protégés vulgarity, Celestia struggled a few seconds to keep up. The answer was there, but it still surprised her to see Twilight miss it in the first place.

"It's not as cut and dry as you necessarily think." She lowered her prodigious frame to the ground, a quiet sigh escaping at the feel of grass on her belly, even if it was through the constrictive royal garments such an occasion required.

"Yes, she slept with him. However Sunset also caused Blueblood's latent empathy to emerge. Can you imagine that ?" Celestia toyed with an errant dandelion, watching the fluffy seeds float away in a barely noticeable breeze. " I love my nephew dearly, but he is-was a hideously conceited creature. Now it's as if a new stallion walks these halls! If she can crack a nut as difficult as Blueblood, imagine what she could do for greater Equestria?"

Twilight's response was simple and to the point, much like how she felt at the moment

"SHE. FUCKED. HIM."

"Yes it is an... admittedly unconventional approach to ascension." Celestia said, the pause letting all and sundry know her feelings on the matter, "But who are we to argue with the greater will of harmony?"

Twilight was a mare of facts and figures. Even magic, the oldest and most primal force on the planet, had a certain logic to it. This? This just ticked her off. Before Ponyville she might have spent hours obsessing over it, her every waking moment studying and plumbing the depths of arcane tombs looking for an answer. Now she had a better way.

"I'm going to the cake buffet, don't interrupt me or I'll get Starlight to switch your cutie mark with the first idiot I find!"

It was impertinent, it was childish, but somehow it felt more fitting. Especially as she trotted away, a certain blue-haired teen on her mind.

Taking the not-so veiled threat in hoof, and witnessing the raucous coronation party underway through stained glass windows, a tear came to Celestia's eye.

"They grow up so fast."

Author's Note:

Notes are here

Comments

[Cerulean Blue]

Nice story with a great ending.

(the Author's Note link isn't working for me).

[Moproblems Moharmoney]

11542969

Thanks :) I've fixed the link btw.

[duckmagee]

dont let rarity know this method of ascension she might try it out

[Zaki]

I quite enjoyed this. I'm always a fan of Sunset and/or Blueblood stories so this definitely made my day!

[mrmidnight]

I love the fact to make Blueblood a better person was for him to finally get laid XD

[PhycoKrusk]

11543147
It's not as cut-and-dried as that.

It had better not be as cut and dried as that.

[mrmidnight]

11543311
I hate to tell you but Blueblood had some blue balls now he finally feels relaxed and no longer a dick

[Mystic Sunrise]

"They grow up so fast."

This was perfect.
11542981
Should've worked the first time honestly. Always make sure any links you add somewhere work.
11543122

11543143
Same.
11543147
This fandom is crazy like that .

[Moproblems Moharmoney]

11543311
While I'm loathe to explain the joke (because at its core, it is partially a joke) I'll bite.

It's a bit of column A and column B.

A. Its a joke, a goof, a jest. Not to be taken particularly seriously.

B. Throughout the fic It's shown time and again Blueblood's not a complete prick. He willingly wants to re-write the grain tax laws aware of how bad a deal they are, he (attempts) to help Twilight fight off a mysterious invader, he even tries to console Sunset. Yes, Blueblood is an arrogant, conceited, fop. That doesn't make him the worst thing ever, just a pain in the ass.

Reconnecting with his first major love, and hearing about the veritable paradise EQG humanity is (mass food, power, internet etc) widens his scope. It's very much a "Christmas Carol" kind of vibe I went for. The sex was both a funny goof, but also fully lights a flame that was already smoldering. Sunset reforged a connection, which forced Blueblood to reevaluate things. Meanwhile Sunset creating that connection to ascend is both a goof (as Twilight eloquently highlights) but also happens to be a big challenge, because she changed his mind without influencing it, but by merely showing Blueblood some genuine love and contact.

[Frankie2]

I... um... uh...
I was not expecting Sunset to become an alicorn. I don't blame Twilight for being upset. I'm surprised Twilight stayed in the castle and we didn't see one of the Apples open the barn and woke her up or something like that. Twilight really got put behind the 8-ball in this fic.

[PhycoKrusk]

11543377
Yes. I know.

The statement that you responded to in order to explain a joke was, itself, a joke.

[Moproblems Moharmoney]

11543458
Jokeception!

[FanOfMostEverything]

Getting Blueblood to actually think of commoners as people is definitely up there with turning friendship into literal, useable magic. Brilliantly silly tale. Thank you for it.