• Published 28th Jan 2023
  • 397 Views, 30 Comments

An Unpleasant Reflection - Tumbleweed



Flash Sentry, certified Hero of Equestria, not to mention self-confessed liar, coward, and all-around-scoundrel, finds himself facing ... himself?

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Chapter 1

In my long, undeserving, and otherwise “storied” career, I’ve faced (or, more accurately, fled in terror from) every sort of terrifying, pony-eatinghorror our surprisingly dangerous world has to offer. And yet, as I look back on my misbegotten life of cowardice, there’s one terror that stands out from them all, one thing that still, to this day, can send a chill down my spine.

A letter from Princess Twilight Sparkle.

It’s a different sort of horror, I should note. Receiving a letter from Princess Twilight isn’t the sort of thing to reduce a pony to screaming and panicked retreat, but rather, the arrival of a starched envelope sealed with a telltale seal in purple wax provokes a more anticipatory horror. Oh sure, Princess Twilight often means well, but that somehow makes the inevitable chaos that follows in her wake worse. Where most of the more overtly murderous creatures I’ve crossed over the years have long since been imprisoned, banished, or slain, Princess Twilight is still out there in her palace, just waiting to summon a certified Hero of Equestria out of retirement for one last, mad quest.

Of course, Carrot Top does not share my phobia of royal stationery. Then again, she’s not afraid of anything. Which has served her well in her career as Special Agent Golden Harvest, master of hoof to hoof combat. Then again, it’s easy to be fearless when you can clobber most anything smaller than a full grown dragon.

And the most damning thing of all is that I’ve been summoned so many times and subsequently sent off on so many life threatening fiascoes is that they all have blended together over the years. It’s to the point I can’t quite recall the exact circumstances of just when and how Carrot Top and I wound up at Princess Twilight’s Ponyville Palace on a pleasant and sunny summer morning.

“And you’re sure you don’t know what this is about?” I shifted my wings uneasily as I stared up at Princess Twilight’s castle.

“Nope.” Carrot Top said, and I even believed her. Mostly.

“Maybe it’s just a social call?” I clung to the optimistic prospect. “Admittedly, the letter was rather tersely worded for a social call. One doesn’t throw around terms like ‘as soon as possible’ and ‘of the utmost importance’ just for afternoon tea.”

“Rarity might, actually.” Carrot Top took a moment to adjust some of the braiding on my dress uniform (as of course I wore my dress uniform to see the Princess. Force of habit, I guess). “But I doubt this is a fashion emergency.”

“So it’s just a regular emergency, then?”

“Sentry.” Carrot Top put a hoof on my shoulder, both to reassure me and to keep me from bolting. “The borders are quiet, there aren’t any ancient evils about to wake anytime soon, and we’ve already survived this year’s Grand Galloping Gala. This is the quietest I’ve seen Equestria in years.”

“And that’s what’s got me worried. What if there’s something that even Special Agent Golden Harvest doesn’t know about? There’s always some sort of trouble brewing, it’s just a matter of where.”

“If it’s any consolation, somepony broke into the vaults at the Manehattan museum of art last week, so it’s not like things are completely quiet. But Manehattan’s a long way from Ponyville, and I understand they’ve already got Miss Maple on the case. Nothing to do with us.”

“Then what does Princess Twilight want with me?”

“Only one way to find out.” Carrot Top said, and knocked on the door.

Like I said, she’s not afraid of anything.

The door swung open, and sure enough, there was Princess Twilight Sparkle, smiling and purple. One would think she would have attendants to greet guests, or even that little dragonling of hers, but that whatever was happening was important enough for the Princess herself to meet us so soon wasn’t particularly encouraging.

“Flash! You made it! Please, come in!” Princess Twilight stepped out of the way, and I trotted into the foyer (after Carrot Top nudged me along, that is). “And-- oh, hi Carrot!”

“Hiya Twilight!” Carrot Top walked in beside me. “I hope I’m not imposing? I know the letter wasn’t for me, but since I was visiting Flash when it came in--”

“Oh, right.” Twilight’s wings unconsciously drooped just a fraction, showing Twilight’s disappointment at the fact that I was assuredly not single. “You and Flash are--”

“Close.” Carrot Top and I said, simultaneously. That single word was enough to convey the … unique relationship between Carrot and I without giving it a specific definition, which was how the both of us liked it.

“Right. Well, Carrot, you’re always welcome here, but, um-- I need Flash for something a little, uh, delicate?”

“Delicate?” Carrot Top said, voice breathy with surprise.

“Very!” said the Princess of Friendship. “Very delicate. Also strange? And, well, I don’t want to use the term ‘state secret,’ but, um-- it’s the sort of thing that you might not want to know about.”

“Oh my.” Carrot Top held a hoof to her mouth, shocked. “Will he-- will Flash be okay?” She even fluttered her eyelashes at me in quite a damselified manner.

“Absolutely! This won’t be dangerous at all!” Princess Twilight, of course, remained blithely unaware of how unnerving that statement could be. “I just need to introduce Flash to a … friend of mine.”

At that, Carrot Top raised an eyebrow.

“Some sort of diplomatic thing, then?” I bit back a wince.

“Not exactly?” Princess Twilight said. “It’ll be easier to introduce you. But my friend’s very shy, which is what makes things so--”

“Delicate.” Carrot Top said.

“Exactly!” Princess Twilight nodded. “I know it sounds weird, and that’s kind of because it is weird, but I’m not trying to exclude you or anything-- except I guess I am, and I feel really bad about it, and--”

“It’s okay!” Carrot Top said with a giggle. “I didn’t mean to impose. I’ll just go for a walk, maybe grab a bite to eat. Tell Twilight’s friend I said hi!” And with that, Carrot Top pulled me in for a hug which was justfirm enough to remind me that she could kick through cinderblocks. While she had me pulled in close, she tilted her head up to murmur into my ear. “Find out what the Princess is planning. I’ll scout the surrounding area, just in case.” Ever the professional, she was.

I could only nod.

And so, Carrot Top let me go, putting on her harmless mask once more as she bid her goodbyes and trotted out the door.

“Right!” Princess Twilight closed the palace door with a little push of magic. “Now then, Flash-- how much do you know about parallel dimensional theory?”

“Absolutely nothing.” I said. This was a mistake.

“Mmm, right.” Princess Twilight started walking deeper into her palace, beckoning me to follow. I complied, of course, and even kept my eyes off of the Princess’ admittedly impressive plumage. For the most part. “Let me give you a brief primer on the foundations of thauma-quantological mathemagic.”

And with that, the Princess of Friendship launched into a lengthy monologue of which I was lucky to understand one word in five. Now, I wouldn’t call myself a stupid pony (apart from all the damn-fool things I’ve done over the years), but I’ve always focused on the more important things. Which is to say, ladies, libations, and living well. As such, Princess Twilight’s prattling went way over my head, even before she started bandying about terms like “universal parallelism” or “entangled soulstate wavelengths.” Honestly, if it weren’t for Princess Twilight’s boundless enthusiasm and casual expertise, I would’ve thought she was making it up as she went along. Nonsense or no, I merely nodded in feigned understanding whenever she glanced back at me, until we finally arrived at a pair of tall, closed doors.

“Oh-kay!” Princess Twilight said. “Now that you’ve had time to get your head around the basic principles, what comes next shouldn’t be any surprise at all! So long as you’ve been paying attention that is.” And so help me, Princess Twilight winked, as if she were sharing some private joke.

Before I could ask any of the countless questions that came to mind, Princess Twilight threw the doors open with no small degree of showmareship. On the other side of the doors was the palace’s central meeting room, complete with the famed Cutie Map on the central round table, but what got my attention was the baffling figure standing on the opposite side.

“Flash Sentry,” said Princess Twilight. “I’d like you to meet … Flash Sentry.”