A Dragonborn, Destiny, and Very Small Horses

by DarrParrot

Chapter 3

A Dragonborn, Destiny, and Very Small Horses

Part 3: O Brave New World, O Beauteous Ponies

(A letter from Darr-Ei) Some of you will no doubt comment on the tangential nature of my story. Those who will comment on that are probably civilians. This is not just a tale of my arrival, but a little demonstration of how my mind works. Why? I'll explain this later, because telling you now would ruin the narrative potential of my story. I have enough free reign here to worry about narrative potential. No, that was not a threat. Why would it even be a threat? Not what I intended in the least.)

I stepped out of the threshold of my home; however, I as soon as my foot moved forward to take another step, it connected with the ribs of a dead guard. I decided to take a look around my environment further and I noticed that a lot of people were dead. I was a bit shocked at how much I had killed. I walked over the body and I surveyed the gore littering the battlefield. There were a multitude of limbs and innards strewn about the town square and the roads. Shocked would've been an appropriate word for how I was feeling. I was shocked at how ruthless and effective I was at... defending myself. I will not lie, by saying I felt no remorse. I will not lie, by saying I was not jaded at my constant murdering of living things. I will not lie to you, and to myself, by saying I was not proud. I was proud at how thorough I was, no matter how sickening it may be to you. It very may well be, but you may already have guessed that I am rather evil in some ways. You would not expect less of me. I do have a reputation to uphold in a certain land. I feel the need to say that if circumstances were different, I would be comfortable having a more positive reputation. Let's just say that mistakes were made. As I walked through the streets I thought about my task.

What would I encounter on the Other Side? Would the denizens be friendly, would they crave blood, would they look similar to those who reside on Nirn? And most important of all (at the time anyway), were they strong?

These thoughts pervaded my mind as I walked past the gate that led to the wilderness of Skyrim. I stopped and looked at the Throat of the World. The huge mountain rising through the cloud layer, with snow covering it's summit and point. It did not seem to be a huge obstacle as it once did. It seemed as if it was a part of me. Without it I just might not have been myself. A true Dragonborn. All of the most important parts of my life have occurred there. Perhaps even the saddest. The murdering of Paarthurnax. I hated thinking about what I had done. I could not even bring myself to warn him. Or even...apologize beforehand. There was so much I could have done, but I just could not. The Blades would not have me in their ranks if I did not kill him. "He may have changed and he may have helped us, but he still enslaved humans", they would have said. Their logic is something I despise. Everyone can be forgiven. They can all be shown the way...

***

I awoke. I had fallen asleep STANDING UP reminiscing about my past. I looked around me to see if anyone was sneaking around, perhaps another member of the Grounded looking to get a cheap shot in. There was nothing. Just the grass, the stars, the immense mountain ranges, and the moon. I am still taken aback at how beautiful the night is in Skyrim. I figured that now was not the time for reflection, that it was the time to hasten my progress towards the mountain. I stretched my arms, and twisted my neck slightly to get the tendons less tense, and I sprinted across the plain between Whiterun and the Throat. The wind whipped past me and the grass was crushed underfoot. I kept going until I saw the river that separated the Throat and Whiterun. I stopped just at the edge. This river was the bane of my existence. It always slows me down. I figured I might as well swim. I jumped into the water and swam towards the shoreline closest to the many-thousand steps at High Hrothgar.

***

I had climbed the seven thousand steps for the 5th time. I used to find it painstaking and laborious, but I began to see it as the builders wished. As a time to remember those who gave their lives to end the dragon menace. I also saw it as a time to reflect upon the Way of the Voice. Which is when I realized that Words should be able to be formed into compound...Sentences. I resolved to test this as soon as I could. I soon arrived at the Greybeards' home. I continued up the last few steps and looked at the statue of Talos. How could a man become a god? Absolutely unbelievable I said to myself. Yet I could still feel the truth of Talos’ godhood resonating within me. Mundus was a place where men could become gods. The statement still feels rather odd, yet it gave me hope for something I could not explain. I opened the door and walked inside.

***

The Greybeards' domain is very dreary and rather anticlimactic when you first walk in. However, when you stay there for a while, you begin to sense the pure power that emanates from within its walls. It fills you with a sense of pride and strength that is rivaled by very few places. You can feel the Words of thousands of Thu'um masters, and Dragonborn alike. The very power of the Voice resonates within the air. They are united by their traversing of the Way. It makes you cease whatever pointless thoughts you may have, and in the place of these extraneous thoughts, deeper ones sprout. It is an incredible place. I continue onwards, my footsteps echoing in Hrothgar's stone walls. I acknowledge the Greybeards' presence and I keep walking. I can almost feel the portal's presence. A part of me thinks it may actually be Black Marsh, when the other, more rational part says that it is somewhere else. Either way it is still dangerous to leave the portal unchecked. I arrive at the door to the courtyard. I throw open the doors. It snows harder and a cold wind wafts in through the opening. I am not cold. Okay, maybe a little. I step outside.

This is where another interesting chapter in my life begins

I say to myself as I continue onward towards the path to the Throat.

***

I'm almost by the end of the path to the Throat when a thought crosses my mind. How do I look? I realize that I may scare off the denizens in the Other Side. I laughed and I resigned to myself that it would be more interesting if they were terrified of me. That way I can test my speaking skills. I want to challenge myself in the persuasion section. That way some fights can be avoided. If I want them to be anyway. I continued onward, the snow and wind wailing, and the snow beneath my boots being crushed. I walk upwards and I climb up onto a rock.

I am so close to the portal and to a new realm. I am also close to Paarthurnax's remains.Too be honest, I dread coming here. It still enrages me to see what I did. I will have to move on at some point. Just remember Paarthurnax for his good deeds, and rationalize his death with his bad deeds. I keep climbing rocks until I see the Word shrine Paarthurnax used to perch upon. I look for the portal when I see it.

It is an oblong shape, shimmering like the surface of a pond. I can see a faint swampy forest within its confines. The swamp in general looks only a little bit like Black Marsh. It has the general black and green coloring, but this swamp is... more colorful. In a dark way. Even during noon in Black Marsh, it is as dark as night in most areas. It is perplexing. This swamp is almost beautiful. I found myself becoming wistful at its resemblance to my home. I walk towards it. I wonder what I must do to enter. Should I just enter in? Is there some sort of puzzle? Do I summon a daedra?. I will admit, the last one was sort of a joke. Most of those questions were just remnants of past experiences that annoyed the hell out of me. I took inventory of my items. I had Luna, the Onyx Soul Crusher, and my armor. To be perfectly honest, that was all I felt I needed. I had my assorted charms and trinkets, but those were nothing to take note of. At least not right now. I wondered what the best possible entrance to this new land would be. I would need to make an appearance definitely. Show the denizens what I was all about, representation of another land be damned. I wanted to show all of the magic and beauty that existed in Tamriel. I realized that I had to be sure how I would arrive when I got there. Depending on how the portal works, anything can happen. I might not even arrive where it shows, odd as that is. The best way to figure this out, I thought, was to throw an object in there and see where it arrives.

I tried to figure out what to throw in. I reasoned it had to be substantial, and a living thing. It also had to be neutral. Not evil or good. How I decided this, I do not know, but that is what I thought. I searched around for something to fit these criteria, when I heard "MEEEEEEEHHHRHHHHHH" or something like it. I knew deep within my heart what must be done. I advanced towards the place where I heard it. The goat saw me coming. It looked me in the eyes, and I thought I could see a hint of adventure, and perhaps even agreement. I nodded and picked it up. I ran towards the portal with the goat in my arms, and I threw it headlong into the portal. A large boom and shockwave erupted out of the portal and knocked me on my back. Dazed, I stood up and looked towards the image in the portal. The goat was standing in a clearing in the forest and was looking around confused. I erupted into triumphant laughter and began to cheer. That is when I heard the goat cry out "MERRH-" and it was silenced. I saw a brief shadowy flash snatch the goat up, and it was gone from my sight.

I WAS FURIOUS. Something had just taken that innocent goat away, no doubt to kill it. That goat was extraordinary. It seemed so intelligent, it was my comrade, and now it is gone. My partner in exploration murdered out of instinct with no rational thought. I did not approve. I roared to the heavens, and I backed up, sped into a run, and lept into the portal.

***

The experience is very hard to describe. A multitude of images flooded my mind. Space, Nirn's two moons, past events, things I have no words for, creatures I have never seen, walls with narrow, hollow geometry, daedric letters, and the face of a gold and blue elf-like creature. Words became apparent to me, that I did not know the meaning to and knowledge that only few know passed through my mind like the mirror-like film of a waterfall. I felt my body being replaced and rearranged and my scales were on fire. This fire did not hurt, but it was very uncomfortable nonetheless. I have cause to believe I blacked out multiple times due to the rush of information and sensations. I felt a pulling sensation and I opened my eyes.

Light.

***

It was very, very dark in this forest. The transition from seeing all of those different images in the portal to seeing this constant darkness jarred me. The colors of the swamp seemed to be outlined and defined so as to make them more visible. The dark greens and browns of the forest seemed more vibrant than what I would see in Skyrim. After marveling over the coloring of this realm I surveyed my environment. I was in a clearing surrounded by tall, gnarled trees, with hanging, fern-like leaves. They had a sinister look to them, that was actually kind of lighthearted. As odd as that sounds, it was closest to the truth. There was a dark mist surrounding the area, that further added to the unfriendly, swamp-like atmosphere of this area. I admit that I was kind of threatened in a "about-to-be-attacked-by-a-stuffed-alligator" sense. This didn't stop me from taking out my O.S.C. If anything I'd just scare off whatever tried to attack me. I assumed that my best course of action would be to figure out WHAT THE HELL TO DO NEXT. I looked to see if the portal was still there. It was, fortunately. The visage of the mountaintop displayed in the portal's surface. I figured that I could go back anytime I want. So I thought I would have some fun and explore this swamp. My stomach began to growl, and that is when I realized that hunting would be required for me to survive in this place. I took my OSC out and started off into a path in the forest. I walked onward and kept my eyes peeled for any movement that might signify, a rabbit, or... a goat. I sighed, realizing I forgot about my goat. I figured that I would have to track him if I wanted vengeance. I went back towards the clearing and I looked for footprints or some sign of him. I saw his little hoof marks in the mud and I looked in the direction they were facing. There was a straight path of broken tree limbs and assorted displaced foliage. I was exhilarated and sprinted off into that direction.

***

I walked for about an hour when the broken foliage and tracks began to drift towards the left slowly. I followed, for I was determined to reunite with that brave goat. The forest suddenly ended and I heard a faint goat vocalization from somewhere off in the distance. Somewhere above me. I saw my goat up on a mountain-top being tormented by some sort of...vulture. Hope filled my mind and I ran toward a path by the side of the mountain that spiraled upward. I ran up the path and kept running until the faint "merhhhss" became gradually louder. I reached the top and saw my goat. It was being pecked at by a winged beast. It had a scorpions tail with a large stinger at the end. It's mouth was tentacled, and the thing was covered in scales. I was surprised that such a thing could reside here. My goat was miraculously dodging each attempt the creature made at stinging it. I was so gods-damned proud. This goat was amazing. I felt tears well up. This goat would not let a stronger creature destroy it. It would fight on until it found what it wanted in its life. It would let its own strength carry it on. I cheered it on from the sidelines. The winged creature began to grow angry, it let out a deep-throated screech, and charged with its tail aimed at my goat like a lance. Time began to slow down, my breath caught in my throat, I saw the goat's visage turn into something defiant, and the creature's tail sped towards the goat prepared to stab it. My goat crouched downward, and it disappeared in a flash. My jaw dropped.

The creatures tail embedded itself in the ground, and my goat appeared behind it. The goat leaped back, and charged at the creature, goring it in the back with its horns. My goat took it's horns out of the creatures back. The creature screeched and it's back arced backward in pain. It fell to the ground, limp, and bleeding. I looked at my goat, in awe of its strength. It stared at me. I got to my knees and gave my goat a hug. I got up, and looked towards the horizon. The sun was rising.

Today truly was special

***

The goat, who I dubbed Mina-Ka (after an Argonian hero), and I went down from the mountain. I brought back the carcass of the monster so I could eat it later. I followed the path I took to get to the mountain and I followed it back to the clearing. I arrived and all was how I left it, except for some tracks in the mud. I decided that leaving the clearing would be best. If Mina-Ka could talk, I bet he would've agreed. I decided to explore further, and see if this land had any semblance of civilization. I lifted the dead carcass onto my back and trudged into the misty, dark parts of the forest. I walked for a long time, deep in thought about what occurred. And by deep in thought, I mean that I was a bit puzzled about what Mina-Ka killed, but promptly ignored. I figured that I would keep going until I reached either a city or village, or dry land. Mina-Ka and I walked onwards through the forest keeping an eye out for anything that might seem like a house. It quickly became nighttime when we arrived at an area that I quickly noticed had dry land. It was perfect to build a fire. It also seemed to be on the edge of this rather swampy forest. The smoke might rise rather high which would alert any civilized, or savage culture to us. It seemed like a great idea at the time.

Mina-Ka and I both sat down, and I took the dead creature from off of my back. I laid it upon the ground and I started up a fire spell in my right hand. I went to find some lumber to make a spit to roast the creature. I was looking about for some lumber when I realized that I wasn't even sure the creature was edible. I really shouldn't even take all this time to eat something that might just kill me. I would just eat it the old-fashioned Argonian hunter way. That is, to eat the heart of something to determine its poisonous contents. Oddly enough, only Argonians and those with Argonian attributes can achieve this. If you were to try this as a human, there is a good chance you would die.

I took my Luna and placed the point to the neck of the beast. I stabbed the point at least one inch into its flesh, and dissected the creature from its neck to what appeared to be its navel. I grabbed each side of the cut I had made and tore it open. I dug my hand in and reached around for the closest shape I felt to a heart. I tore it out. It looked surprisingly similar to a daedra heart. I noted this, feeling it may become useful, and I lifted off my helmet. I cleared my throat and put the creature's heart to my mouth. A silent prayer to our gods that shall not be known was said and I bit into the heart. Blood spurted out of the heart covering my face. The heart flesh was still in my mouth when the taste hit me. It was delicious. In fact it was quite delicious. I devoured it ravenously, appearance be damned, and I swallowed. I wiped my face off and sighed. I put my helmet back on. My hunger was sated, I resolved to explore some more, when I heard something behind Mina-Ka and I. I turned around swinging my sword but I stopped at what I saw.

A yellow-furred horse-like creature with large, blue expressive eyes. It seemed to have pink...hair and wings. You can imagine my surprise. It couldn't have been more than 4 feet tall. I noticed something else about it. It was terrified of me. I can't say I was surprised. I wore armor created from the hearts of evil creatures and black metal. My armor was a deep black, with glowing red lines etched into its ridges. Suffice to say its fear was perfectly understandable. We must've stayed in that particular position, my blade poised to strike its head off, her terrified gaze fixed on me. Suddenly, its eyes darted to the corpse behind me, and to Mina-Ka. Its countenance abruptly shifted into intense rage and she stepped forward. I pulled my blade away, and its wings lifted her into what it may have thought was eyelevel. It began to speak, a whisper quickly forming into a yell, "How could you have done this?!!" I stepped backwards to provide more room for it, which I now realized was a she, since I just heard her voice. She doggedly kept her face pressed to my helmet. I noticed that her eyes gradually became larger as she yelled at me "It was just trying to live!! YOU COULD'VE LEFT IT ALONE!" I will admit that me and Mina-Ka could've just fled from it, but Mina-Ka was dead set on killing it. It wasn't my choice and I would be glad to admit that I was wrong, and accept some form of retribution. However, if this horse-like thing wasn't yelling at me, and trying to get on my back, I might've been more inclined to listen. She pressed her face even closer to me and she began to stare into my eyes. I felt her gaze penetrate into the first layer of my mind. I felt terrible feelings of guilt. She was trying to guilt me. To flood my mind with images of those I killed, and the mistakes I have made. This was not something I would let happen to me. I can’t have regrets, nor can I feel guilt. Not now. NEVER.

I could feel her breaking down my mental barriers. I feel that if I was not shown those images I had been when I was transported here, she would've broken me. Her... Stare was deflected by a word, that I have now forgotten. This word reinforced the barriers of my mind and if I recall correctly, altered my mind. Altered how exactly? I cannot quite remember. All I know is that I felt very, very wise. Anyway, this Word was not draconic, nor any language I can recall. It seemed... old. Old in a terrifying sense. Unimaginably old. The image I see when I recall it, is a tower, threatening to break at any moment at the slightest lapse in concentration. I dare not recall it further because I do not have that much concentration. Using the Word was not even my decision. It was something else. When the Word was used her stare was momentarily broken. I used this time to grab her throat, firmly, but not enough to choke. Or so I wished. The sudden force around her neck, cause her to stop the Stare, as I will no doubt call it from now on. I wanted her to look into my eyes. I began to speak, "I do not appreciate the attempt to bend me to your will. No one has tried that, and they will never try it, because not many know how. I recommend that, if any of your kind, or any of your civilization will try it, that they prepare a eulogy, because I will murder them. In the coldest blood imaginable." I cleared my voice and began to speak in a softer tone. "I apologize for harming you and that creature. You see, I was hungry, and besides, I didn't really kill it. That was my companion, Mina-Ka. The goat you see by my side" I pointed at him with my free hand. "He was attacked by the winged-beast so I was trying to save him, when he impaled the creature of his own accord. Do you understand me?" She nodded, once again, terrified. I was kind of surprised. I found it odd how she understood my language even though I was a guest from another land. I released her and she fell to the ground. I felt rather bad and I felt like being friendly so I began to ask her name when she promptly yelped and fainted. I sighed and put her upon my back. I sheathed my weapons and headed off into the edge of the swamp.

I must've walked for at least another hour before I saw a light in the distance. I jogged briskly off toward the light, jumping over stray roots, and dodging overhanging branches. The light became more pronounced and I saw the abode that housed my guiding light.

I was confused and dumbstruck by the...rhyming. I didn't know how to respond. I wondered if I should rhyme in turn or just answer normally. I decided that answering normally would be the best. "Excuse me, but, I have a... injured...horse here. I think she might need medical attention."
I didn't hear anything and then the door slowly opened. In the doorway stood a black and white striped horse-like creature. This creature seemed familiar to me. I think they may have been called zebras. A miniature zebra just opened the door. The day was just getting odder for me.
Her mouth opened wide and she looked at me inquisitively.

"Your kind, I have never seen,

And you certainly look rather mean,

Where is the one that needs healing?

You do not seem like one so feeling."
And I took the yellow one off of my back and cradled her in my arms to show the zebra that she is in fact with me. "She's right here." I confirm. The zebra nods and she motions for me to follow her into her house. I am a bit daunted at the task of fitting into the house but I realize that it is much bigger on the inside than it seems. But not by much. The zebra motions for me to put her on a table and I do so, placing her gently down. The zebra quickly looks over the fainted miniature horse, gesturing oddly to herself, and speaking in her odd tongue. She sighs and looks at me.

"The yellow one has taken a rest,

But perhaps not at her own true behest,

I start to get a little nervous. I didn't quite feel like seeing the yellow one run away from me in terror. I just wouldn't be able to handle such guilt. I ask the zebra, "Are you sure that this is a good idea? Shouldn't she just get her rest? I mean-" the zebra silences me.

"We must know what affected miss Fluttershy,

Seeing her like this... I must know why, "
She rhymed, looking rather serious. I resigned to her plan, sighing. I then heard a "Merhhhh" right behind me, and that's when I realized that I had forgotten all about Mina-Ka. I nodded and gave him a little pat. Mina-Ka "Merrhhh"d again he pointed his horns toward the zebra and turned his head inquisitively. I knew what he meant. I had to accrue some info about where I am. And who everyone is. I already knew who the yellow one was at that point in time. That was something off the check list. I cleared my throat and started asking all of the questions I thought of. "Alright. I have some questions. I arrived here from another dimension. What is this place called? What are you called, name-wise and species wise? Who is she? Why does she have wings? What is this area we're in called? What kind of society are you built upon? What are your religions like? Do you crave war? Do you have the capabilities of war? Why are you so...cute?"
Her eyes widened in surprise. She looked at the ground, scraped her hoof against the ground, tapped against her chin. She began to open her mouth, and shut it. She yawned and said

" You have just spoken many a question,

But I am tired, and to my bed I go a-questin',

Fluttershy will be fine, or so I think,

She normally always faints, to a cause for this, I can always make a link."
I gave a short laugh, wished her a good-night, and took my armor off. the zebra left to go sleep somewhere else. I was suddenly overcome by exhaustion. I just realized how much I had done. The emotions felt definitely took a toll on me. I found a comfortable looking corner and put my back to it. I closed my eyes, when I felt Mina-Ka crouch right beside me. I felt as if I had a staunch blade-brother to join me in battle, to join me in mirth, and to join me in laughter. I was calm. Yet there was a part of me that felt regret over hurting...Fluttershy. It gave me a slight feeling of pain just thinking about it. I knew that I would have to make it right as soon as possible.

***

I awoke to the sound of the zebra's singing. I quickly stood up, awakened Mina-Ka, and walked over to her. I asked her, "How is... Fluttershy? Is she alright?" She replied

" Fluttershy is still asleep,

From her, you won't hear a peep,

At least not yet."

I was about to ask why she broke her rhyming scheme, but thought better of it. I prepared myself to ask her more about the general situation. "Excuse me, what is your name?"

She began, "There are those that call me Zecora,

I have a talent for potions and flora,

My species is defined as Zebra,

And my hometown is known as Zaroma"

I nodded and said "My name is Darr-Ei. My story is a long one, and I would prefer to keep it as that. A synopsis is not in order, as rude as that may be." That's when I heard a very quiet, very high pitched yawn. It was the most adorable thing I had ever heard. Me and Zecora both looked up from our conversation and she cantered over to where Fluttershy lay. I crouch walked over and put my hands on the table. She shifted slightly and opened her eyes slowly. She looked over at Zecora and said quietly, "Oh, hello Zecora, where am I? Why am I here? The last thing I remember was..." And then she looked over at me. Fluttershy screamed. Or at least that is what Zecora told me. She was screaming so high-pitched that I could barely hear her. She flew up into Zecora's cupboard and started shaking. It rattled violently. Zecora was awestruck by this sudden outburst. I felt absolutely terrible. I have never caused someone that kind of fear. This was completely new to me. I sat down. Zecora looked at me puzzled. She looked back at the cupboard and said

"Fluttershy dear, what causes you this fear?

Whatever it is, I would be glad to hear."

Fluttershy began to speak "I-i-i-i-it's h-h-him..." Zecora looked at me angrily.

"What did you do, O mysterious traveler?

Whatever it was, it sure did rattle her!"

Which is when I began to smell smoke. I ran to the window and looked outside. Out in the distance I could see fire. Bright, huge flames. I wondered what the hell it could be, when I realized that IT WAS MY FIRE FROM THE FIRST NIGHT. My jaw dropped, and I yelled "Zecora, do you smell that!? There is a fire outside, we have no time for this!" She was about to interject when I saw her nostrils flare. Her eyes widened in fear and I am pretty damn sure that is when she smelled it. She was about to go outside when I stopped her with my hand. She seemed offended, but I ignored it. I opened the door. I was about to run towards the direction of the fire when a large bright flash blinded me. I tried to cover my eyes but the damage was done. I stumbled a bit and tried to concentrate my vision back. I was confused. I thought I was blind to be perfectly honest. I began to heal myself, and that's when I saw her. The bright alabaster... pegacorn? Ah yes, alicorn. She dropped down from the sky covered in white light, and landed in front of me. The crown and horseshoes she wore made me feel a bit underdressed. Considering that I was naked. I looked behind me and I saw Zecora and Mina-Ka come out from the house. They were in awe. The alicorn walked regally toward me and eyed me stoically. She spoke to me in an even, motherly voice

"What has happened here?"

I replied, with a weary, smirk,

"O beauteous white horse, I Darr-Ei, have arrived. Now let me tell you what happened. That entire fire was my damn fault. I don't need to hear your mouth on it though. Leave me to take care of it or so help me I will leave and let it burn this forest to the ground. Are we clear? "

The End of Chapter 3

Atuhors Nose: Well well well, this ship was long as fudge. I enjoyed writing it, considering the fact that I consider it some of my best work. Except this piece is like, half unedited. As of yet anyway. Probably the longest thing I've written so far. Sorry about the whole Fluttershy thing. Deal with it. I felt very, very naughty while writing it. Regrets. Regrets. Regrets.

Comments

[jjboyz]

DAT GOAT.

[Arcanus]

That is the greatest goat I have ever heard of.

The goat is a dragonborn I can tell.

[beepboop]

Goat is now insta hero

[NotABrony]

[linch_lord666]

i love you goat

[Captain Grim]

I will never hurt a goat on Skyrim ever again

[Purple Blaze]

162114 '5 minutes later'
*you're standing in the middle of a circle made of goats' corpses*
You: Kill more goats!

That's how I see you not hurting goat again...

[Garino]

Let's see:

Mina-Ka is the most dangerous animal around now.
Darr-Ei has started a forest fire due to no OSHA compliance.
Celestia herself appears before our heroic (term used loosely) Argonian.
And Fluttershy is scared of Darr-Ei.

Yep, seems like a normal day, doesn't it?

[DarrParrot]

163563 Heroic is definitely a term to be loosely applied. Also, no one seemed to have a serious reaction over what happened to Fluttershy.

[BaconHazard]

Make more chapters and I will not have to call the valient and noble of Sovngard upon you!

[DarrParrot]

4th chapter coming out. Pretty short, like, fuggin, 2,890 words right now? maybe more? Its gon b gud

[Sonicbrony66]

OSC?

[DarrParrot]

170392 The name of his hammer. The Onyx Soul Crusher as I mentioned in the other chapters. I chose the name because that's what I use in-game. So yeah.

[Sonicbrony66]

170569 Oh thanks.

[Sonicbrony66]

Now I shall avenge every dead goat I see tenfold. In other words.... COMPLETE AND UTTER GENOCIDE!!!

[Sonicbrony66]

More. I. NEED. MORE!!!!!!!!!!!! Make more wild adventures of Mina-Ka.

[DarrParrot]

So I was thinking. WHY DO PEOPLE LIKE THE GOAT MORE THAN DARR-EI. OH SHIT WAIT I KNOW. HE'S A PSYCOPATH.

[Handcannon Bro]

Wow, this author sure is lucky he has an editor, who is also their friend for this. Otherwise this would be slightly less enjoyable. Hopefully they don't make said editor feel unwanted, as this author clearly has no friends!

[Sonicbrony66]

Aw come on i need more!!!

[DarrParrot]

188011 Lets fuck.

[Handcannon Bro]

189801

I must agree good sir! (me) (you)

[DarrParrot]

189870 Dis nigga.

[jar'o'mayo]

HE IS GOATBORN

[Time Squid]

That goat needs a good hat.

[ArchAIngel]

He used the word for the TOWER?!?! Holy. Shit. Argonian scary dovahkiin.

[Discord_derp]

Authors nose

At the end