This Little Piggy
Twilight happily took a sip of her tea as she sat back in her large chair at the dining table. Sitting across from her were Celestia and Luna, their backs facing each other to avoid any eye contact with each other. As soon as the screams rang through the castle interior, Twilight knew it was time for Rainbow Dash and Pinkie Pie to quickly head back to Ponyville for the night. Now the young alicorn thought it would be good to have a small conversation with the two sisters over exactly what went down just last hour.
Of course after Luna got herself cleaned up.
Rubbing her hoof along her shoulder, Celestia slowly turned her head around towards her sister. The moment she did however, she noticed Luna doing the same. A deep crimson blush fell over both alicorns as they quickly turned back around in their seats. Celestia decided to break the awkward silence with a cough before speaking.
"Twilight , can you please explain to me exactly what you were doing?"
Taking another sip of her drink, Twilight simply smiled at the question. "Well, I do believe I still owed Luna a little bit from her sending me through the ceiling in this place from your chair."
Celestia quickly glanced down to her large throne she was sitting in, glad she had gotten those springs removed. "Okay, but why did you think-
"I believe you already got even with me the night before!" Luna snapped out. "You got me with that drink!"
Celestia lifted an eyebrow in curiosity to hearing that. "What drink?"
Luna slightly turned around so that she could barely glimpse Celestia in her peripheral vision. "Your former student already did a small prank to me for my act. She snuck in something into my water."
"Come on Luna, can you be fair?" Twilight responded with a small grin. "You know that was definitely not even with what you did to me."
Luna cast a hateful glare at the purple alicorn"So you put me in a cracker and made my sister lick my a-
"I DIDN'T KNOW YOU WERE INSIDE OF IT!" Celestia screamed out so loud that the glass in Twilight's magic cracked. Seeing what she did, she took a deep breath to calm herself. "I was not aware you were inside of it. Twilight simply told me that she had a surprise for me and I should wait in my room for it."
Snorting in anger, Luna took a moment to calm her nerves as well. "By the way Twilight, why did you involve Tia in this as well?"
"Well, Princess Celestia told me that she didn't think I had a sense of humor, so I thought it would be nice for her to see what I could do. Although..." Twilight rubbed the back of her head in embarrassment, "I didn't think what happened, well, would have happened."
Both sisters sat silent for a few seconds as they took in what happened. They had both been played in a joke that one of their former students had pulled on them, and surprisingly she did pretty well. Luna then began to chuckle to herself as she began replaying her sisters face in her mind. "So Tia, was I dirty enough for you?"
Celestia's face turned as red as a tomato at that statement. "J-just forget that ever happened! I don't always act like that!"
"I am curious though Tia..." Luna then turned around to look at her sister, a large grin plastered across her muzzle... "Did I taste good on my behind?"
"I SAID SHUT UP!" Celestia smacked her forehead into the table in complete frustration. She irritably flapped her wings several times times before sitting back up. "Can we please just not mention what happened so that-
The three princesses shot up in shock from the sudden shout from the guard in the hallway. Luna quickly stood up in confusion. "What in the world is he-
Suddenly the door to the room burst open as a pair of squealing, grease covered pigs sprinted into the dining area. "WHAT THE BUCK!?" Celestia yelled out as she hopped up onto the table as one of the pigs came crashing by and knocked over her chair. "Guard! Who let that thing in here!?"
The lone Pegasus soldier skidded inside as he kept the animals from escaping. "I'm sorry princess, but I don't know! They were just found running through the hallways!"
"Wait, you mean they- AHHHHH!" Twilight screamed out in terror as one of the pigs jumped through the air and smashed into her. She yelped out in fright as both she and the chair she was in flipped backwards from the weight of the animal as it scrambled away and took off across the carpet once more. "Ow! What in the hay is that thing doing here!?" She screamed out in anger as she wiped off the trail of slick grease that stuck to her face. "Oh my gosh, that's disgusting!"
"Don't worry, I got this one!" The guard shouted as he leaped onto the back of one of the a screeching pigs. As he did though, the grease simply allowed the animal to slip out of his grasp with a wet slurp before it was running once again. "I... Give me a second!"
Luna yelped out as the other pig sprinted by her leg and slicked her fur with its coating. "You filthy little cur! I shall not allow you to dirty up our castle!" Pointing her horn at the creature, she shot out a blast of magic to stick it to the wall... But instead the beam reflected off the pigs side and ricochet towards her sister. "What the-
"Ahh!" Celestia ducked just as he magic shot past her head. "LUNA WHAT DID YOU DO!?"
"I shot the pig! What do you think I did!?"
Twilight looked at the grease that dripped down her hoof before she put it together. "It's anti magic grease!"
"What!? What kind of idiot makes anti magic grease!?" Luna bared her teeth as she looked at the pig that continued to run around the room. "Screw this, I'm gonna catch that little bucker!"
Like a manticore hunting its prey, Luna launched her body through the air and tackled one of the pigs into the wall to her left. Twilight's has dropped as she watched the lunar princess wrestle the creature like a rodeo pony. "Has she done this stuff before?"
The animal thrashed about in Luna's grip as it tried to get away, nearly coming out from its slick grease. The princess grunted in frustration as she used her wings to help hold it between her legs and pull it to her chest. "Tia, come grab its legs!"
"Ew! No, I'm not touching that thing, its filthy!" Celestia yelled out from the top of the table.
"Grow a pair and help me!" Luna yelled out as she rolled across the ground with he pig in her hooves, keeping the animal from running off. She spit out a small amount of grease that slipped inside her mouth. "Bleh! That's tastes horrible!"
"Don't worry princess, we got it now!" The guard yelled as several more soldiers came into the room with a large net. Seeing her chance, Luna let the animal go just as the guards tossed the net over the fleeing animal. "Yes! Got it!" They yelled out in excitement to their success.
Panting from her wrestling match, Luna looked over to the pig that continued to screech inside the net. She also noticed the second one the guards had already captured in her small escapade. sanding up from the ground, she looked down at the thick grease that coated her entire chest and dripped off her wings. "This is disgusting! Who is responsible for those things in here!"
"Like I said princess, they just appeared in the hallway a few minutes ago!" The first guard stated.
Luna sighed as she looked at the pigs then noticed something odd. "What is that?"
Looking closer, she notched one had a number one painted on its flank, and the other a number three. "Holy buck! We are missing one!"
----
From outside of one of the windows to the castle, Discord was laughing hysterically at the screams he was listening to from inside. "Oh ho ho, this is priceless! Ha ha!" He leaned over to the pony that had was sitting beside him. "I must really thank you Applejack. Those pigs you let me borrow were so good."
The farm pony let out a laugh of her own as she leaned against the window frame. "No prob Discord. Ah always get a kick out of a good laugh. Ah have a question though, why did y'all number the pigs like that anyway?"
Discord gave a grin to her question, "now whatever do you mean?"
"Ah mean, y'all put a one and a three on the pigs. Why?"
Before he could answer, Applejack heard a large patrol of guards run down the hallway their direction. "Hurry! We caught pigs number one and three! We have to find number two as fast as possible!"
Applejack lifted an eyebrow in amazement to what she was seeing. "They think there is another pig inside the castle?"
"Yup." Discord laughed as he summoned a bag of popcorn. "I wonder how long it will take them to realize their isn't one."
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Dear lord I want to fav this again!
Classic! A kid in my high school did the same thing with chickens!
Okay, this is hilarious! Soon everyone in Ponyville will be involved in the pranks! Wonder what kind of prank Rarity will help Celestia with? And then Shy helps Luna and Twi get even with Discord. And then Discord unleashes...
"CUTIE MARK CRUSADERS CASTLE PRANKSTERS! YAY!"
And hears how he unleashes them. He tells them to shout that so everyone in the castle hears them...and then he sits them in his room where they have cookies and play board games while the entire castle freaks out about what the CMC will get up to in pranking with Discord's assistance!
It could've been worse. Discord could've brought in that gaint pig from Legend of Zelda Wind Waker that grows so massive it takes away three hearts if it hits you.
Last paragraph, last sentence, wrong 'there'
HOLY FRIGGIN CELESTIA THAT WAS HILARIOUS!
~ Super-Brony12
3620028
I like your line of thinking.
~ Super-Brony12
No matter what happens, Discord is best troll. He's top bro material, and he will stay that way until I see a canonically correct, no BS OC that proves otherwise.
3620028 I fully support this evil venture!
Omg that some funny shit there man!
Ah, the classical "suggest nonexistent missing element" trick.
Omg! Who ever made the cover art can tell the FUTURE! or... the past
Remember in the first episode in the new season 4? Twilight went back in time to see Discord get turned to stone? Well he took their hair and tails, i'm pretty sure he turned them into cotton candy or something else funny with it :D
Wow, putting a 1 and a 3, so clever. Im gonna use that sometime
But what for...
3620021
was it GBHS?
3626780 Nah that wasn't the school.
3626789
oh, i heard about that from a friend who goes there, hey!
i have an evil idea!
3626824 What idea?
3626912
oh, the usual random ideas for spreading paradoxical chaos control to the people of dimension 24-y-kol-purple
buissness as usual
I died.
Please don't hate me, but I think I found an error in the last sentence...
"I wonder how long it will take them to realize their isn't one."
I believe you meant "there isn't one."?
BEST.
So now we gout four of the Mane six... How long until Rarity and Fluttershy join in?
3620401 I love your avatar!
3646164 Yea I fell in love with it when I saw it. I might keep it for awhile its pretty cute.
Aw man, that's a great classic prank. Looks like things are starting to get heated up.
This is the funniest story ever!
i just want to read this like 100000000000 times and fav it 1000000000000 times!